The white house with a pointed roof and large windows were surrounded by lush, green trees. This guest house was nearer to the city than the countryside, but it seemed the owner wanted to create some escapism with the décor.

Iris really liked it, it had a quaint, sweet feel.

Ewan dragged his case towards the front door, so Iris followed behind him. As she walked, she wondered what the people inside would think of her travelling with this man. Would they assume that she was an affair that Ewan wasn’t being very discrete about? They couldn’t assume that she belonged to him since it was clear that she was not highborn.

Hopefully, it would quickly become clear that this was nothing more than business. Iris did not like the idea of judging eyes upon her.

Actually, this was the first time since she had left her own home that she felt scared to have people looking at her again. It felt strange to have that sensation washing over her again, it was almost as if all the work that she’d done on herself in the Oakley household was gone.

Inside, the golden shine of the wallpaper caught the sunlight perfectly, which drew Iris’s eyes towards some wonderful pieces of artwork. There was a portrait of a fine-looking gentleman next to an image of a stormy ocean, which of course was the one that she was mostly drawn to. Iris felt like it represented her emotions, she felt a windy storm brewing inside of her, tossing her through the air like a ragdoll.

“Good evening, Sir,” the kindly-looking lady from behind the counter said. “How may I help you?”

As Ewan reeled off his request for four bedrooms, the lady glanced towards where Iris was standing, half hiding behind the Lord. She felt her spine stiffen as the lady’s gazed drank her in, but as she received a non-judgemental smile, all of that simply fell away.

Maybe the world wasn’t such a scary place, after all.

Eventually, they were taken upstairs and shown to their rooms. Iris felt lucky to be positioned on a different floor to everyone else because it gave her some much-needed space. She'd spent a lot of the day alone in her carriage, but it wasn’t enough. There was so much in her mind that she needed to process and Iris honestly wasn’t sure if there was enough time in the world to go through it all.

Her room had white walls and a cream bed. Everything about it was clean and crisp, which made Iris glad that she didn’t have to clean it up. She wouldn’t cause any mess, but it was very likely that some guests would, and with all the light colours it would undoubtedly be impossible to clear out. Any stains would be impossible to get out, she couldn’t help wondering how the staff at this guest house did it.

Luckily today, Iris did not need to worry about cleaning or looking after anyone else but herself. She was off-duty; this time was all her own.

It was just a shame that there weren't any wonderful paintings here for Iris to stare at like there were in the reception area.

She moved over to the window where an armchair had been positioned perfectly for her to gaze out in the world. It was dark, so she couldn’t see too much, but her brain was much too wired for her to even think about getting any sleep. It was better to stare at the view than look at the ceiling all night long.

As she gazed out over the trees, Iris returned to her favourite pastime, one that she hadn’t really done much of in a very long time. She let her mind wander and her imagination came flooding back like an old friend.

Iris imagined she was back in that pub, talking to Ewan, but of course this time the conversation went very differently.

“I feel like we should talk about our... previous meeting. At the Warwick household.”

“Yes, of course,” Ewan replied in Iris’s imagination. “I want to talk about it too. I have not been able to stop thinking about it. I should have kissed you that night, and I wish to kiss you now.”

“Then you should kiss me right now,” Iris saw herself replying bravely. “We will only have one life, so we should embrace it wholly, should we not?”

“Mmm, I love breaking the rules with you. Especially as you make such a good point. Why not live our lives to the maximum?”

Iris's heart fluttered violently as she pictured Ewan pressing his lips to hers. She had never felt the urge to kiss anyone before, not anyone real. Of course, she'd had her daydreams about a mysterious prince that didn't exist, but this was someone real, someone in her life, someone she could kiss if things were different.

If life was something different, they could be kissing right now.

Iris could not believe that after all this time she had fallen in love with someone, just for him to be a man that she could never have. If she was herself, and her parents – or at the very least her mother – was alive, she could ask to marry this man. He could actually be hers if she was given a choice.

But now she was lowborn, and Ewan had made it very clear that he could not marry someone who did not share his status. It was a shame for the switch to have brought about such a confusing situation when it had done a lot of good for Iris too.

With a deep and sad sigh, Iris removed herself from the chair and she forced herself over to the basin so she could wash herself down. It hardly mattered that she could not sleep, she needed to get some rest for the big day tomorrow. She had to be suitably prepared to address Elizabeth.

As Iris peeled off her dress and she took her underwear off, she tried to find that fear she had before. It was still utterly terrifying to think about, but it wasn’t as powerful anymore. This mess with Ewan had completely overshadowed everything. Iris wasn’t sure if that was a good thing, or not. It was much better not to worry, but mooning over Ewan wouldn’t ever get her anywhere.

With a clean body and a nightdress on, Iris slid between the slightly scratchy bed sheets at the guesthouse and she wondered what Ewan was doing. Was he fast asleep already, were all his worries gone, or was he lying awake just as she was wondering what could’ve been?

Iris liked to think of him wrestling with his emotions, wondering what could be if things were different. She enjoyed the image of him daydreaming, imagining a future where they could actually be together. She knew it was unlikely and that he was probably snoring loudly already, but it helped her to think that she wasn’t the only one.

She actually smiled to herself as she considered it. She felt an unexpected burst of happiness coming deep from within her. If Ewan was as tortured as she felt, then maybe he loved her too. It was a hopeless love, but something that they shared. Something that would bond them forever. Maybe it wouldn’t help her to witness him with a wife who he could actually love freely, but it would get her through this journey at the very least.

* * *

Another night of very little sleep, Iris stared at her weary face in the mirror, noticing the darkness under her eyes. Her skin was also a little pale, like it needed much more beauty sleep. Unfortunately, that seemed to be the one thing that Iris could not offer it. She had done a little makeup to cover up the worst of it, but she couldn’t hide it all. She was exhausted, on the biggest day of her life.

It is finally time to face the music, today is the day I will see Elizabeth.

There was one wonderful thing to this, at least she would get to spend some time with her big sister. It was going to be fraught and stressful, but this was someone who knew the real her inside and out. Someone that she didn’t need to hide a single thing from. The mask could slip totally away. Iris felt like she could finally let out a deep breath that she’d been holding in.

But first... breakfast. She could vaguely recall a mention of food being served in the dining area this morning, and although no plans were made she assumed that was where she would be meeting Ewan.

After one final check that she had packed all of her belongings away, and a last glance out of the window, Iris clicked the door to her guest house bedroom behind her. Then she slowly made her way down the spiral staircase until she spotted a selection of fine-looking men and women entering a room.

Iris did not care that she was underdressed when she spotted Ewan standing next to the queue as if he was waiting for her. What did it matter what anyone else thought of her when this man didn’t mind being seen with her? He did not mind that she had a simple pale dress on, or that her hair flowed freely down her back. If Ewan was not worried, then she couldn’t be either.

It seemed that Ewan cared about how he appeared in society, but seemingly not today. It felt like another sweet moment that was just for them. Just another memory that they could take with them when everything changed tomorrow.

As Ewan’s eyes connected with Iris’s, she instantly felt her pulse race. It was almost as if her knees had turned to jelly and she could barely hold herself upright any longer. Then he smiled and she actually trembled a little.

“Good morning,” Ewan smiled brightly as he spotted her. “Are you hungry? I thought that we could eat something before we start again.”

“Yes, that sounds wonderful, thank you.”

Iris almost went to curtsy, but fortunately, she managed to stop herself at the last minute. She did not want to make their apparent differences so obvious when they were having such a nice time acting almost as equals.

Ewan’s hand hung near hers as they walked into the dining room, which made Iris feel even more excitable. There were electrical bolts fluttering all over her body until she was almost out of control. The knowledge that he could just reach out and touch her at any moment was too much to handle.

He did not touch her, he didn’t take her hand, but that didn’t stop Iris from dreaming.

They took their plates of food and sat at one of the smaller, mahogany tables opposite one another. There was something very intimate about the moment, they were nearer to each other than when they were in the pub, but for some reason, Iris felt much less awkward this time.

She wasn’t sure if it was her, or if it was Ewan, but someone was very different, and that change affected everything.

Ewan had dreamt of the beautiful young woman that sat in front of him all night long, and although he knew that none of what had happened in his imagination was real, it had felt that way and now changed everything.

He knew that he shouldn’t love Daisy, she was a lowborn maid who would wreck him, but he couldn’t help himself. He didn’t intend to make any life changing decisions without speaking to Amy first, but he already had a feeling that she would not mind. From what he understood, Amy adored Daisy and would want her around no matter what.

Or so he hoped.

Now that he’d made the choice to live his life in a much freer manner, he could not take his eyes off of Daisy. He didn't even care if anyone saw him gazing at her like she was the most beautiful woman on the planet... that was exactly how he felt.

He wanted to tell her that he’d changed his mind about everything and that he didn't mean to let her believe that he did not like her because she was lowborn, but he did not know how to form the words. Nor did he think it was wise to get her hopes up when they might be dashed once more.

He also wanted to be cautious of the fact that Daisy was about to lose her father. This was a sensitive time for her, and she could be very emotional. He did not want to throw this into the mix.

“Did you sleep well?” he asked her kindly, deciding to stick to a safe subject. “You look really well today.”

“I do?” Iris gasped in shock. She had seen herself in the mirror this morning, she knew that she looked worn out. “Oh, well thank you.” Despite that, she didn’t want to argue with Ewan’s kindness. “I slept perfectly,” she lied. “Thank you. You look well yourself like you are very prepared for your business meeting today."

“Ah, yes, my meeting,” Ewan mused. “That should be a lot of fun, I am sure.”

“It sounds terribly exciting to me, working with boats and trade. It seems like an adventure.”

“It can be,” Ewan nodded and smiled. “But as with everything, the amount of paperwork involved can be a nightmare. I am certain you can imagine.”

Iris smiled but didn't answer that. "I think I would love to cross the ocean," she commented idly. "To see other lands. I imagine it would be a lot of fun to get to know new cultures.”

“You mean societies without as many rules,” Ewan only half-joked. “Yes, it would be exciting.”

“So, you have never been anywhere else? You work with boats but you have not ever been anywhere?”

Ewan’s expression shut off again as he was reminded of the very things that he wanted to forget for now. “I have always had too many responsibilities for that. Even if I wanted to, I would not be able to.”

“Because of Amy?” Iris knew that she was being too forward, but she didn’t care anymore. “You do not want to leave her?”

“I suppose not.” He shrugged. “But she is my sister and I love her. She needs me. I do not mind sacrificing certain things for her.”

“I do not think she needs you so much anymore,” Iris commented honestly as she thought about the wonderful girl they had left behind. “She is blossoming into a confident young woman.”

Ewan knew that was because of Daisy and her hard work, he had seen an immense change in his sister since she had started working with her, so he grinned at that remark. It was lovely to see his sister gaining more confidence in herself, it was all that he truly wanted for her. He knew that he hadn’t been around as much as he would have liked, and he hated how that affected her. Daisy working for him was the best thing that could’ve happened to them both.

“Yes, I suppose you are right. It is hard to think of her as anything other than my younger sister. But soon she will have her own life, a husband and a family of her own.”

That was when Ewan would have to begin living his own life. Having been handed so much responsibility at such a young age, it was hard to think what his life would be like then. The only thing he knew for sure was that he wanted to be happy during that time, he wanted to finally live. He had earned it, hadn’t he? Had he done enough to deserve that?

He certainly hoped as much, or he was not sure what he would do with his life!