Chapter Six
There was a certain level of nervous excitement that sent chills up my spine each time one of our crew raced. It crept up through my center and stole my breath. I gripped Breanna’s hand, crossed the fingers of my free hand, and rolled back on my heels. Racers and their inner circles were a superstitious bunch, us included. For Devin to step out on his own, race on his own, and not stay quietly back in the shadows the others cast, was a big deal.
Breanna gave my hand a tight squeeze. For the first time in years, she was motionless. Nerves had dissipated her usual restless energy.
“Who are you pulling for?”
There was a flash of white teeth when she smiled in the dark. “Devin, of course.”
Just as I’d always pulled for Jordan, even if I snuck off with Hunter after the race.
The two cars tore up the street before I could think much about it. For such quick events, the races always happened in slow motion for me. My brain processed the motion through an adrenaline filter. The few seconds as the cars sped toward us stretched on forever.
I was too busy screaming when they crossed the line to cover my ears against the deafening roar. Breanna grabbed me and shook me, no longer nervously still. We’d won. Devin had won.
“D-Boy by a car!” Rascal spoke into the two-way before throwing his arms up in the air with a shout.
As Devin idled back toward us, we continued our celebration. The win was exhilarating and invigorating. For just a moment with that win, I forgot all about Jordan and life’s complications. The smile on Devin’s face as he rolled past us, made my heart swell.
I relaxed after that and enjoyed the rest of the races with my sister. Between races, we turned on the radio and danced. Breanna immensely enjoyed Rascal’s remark about how distracting we were. She gave voice to that enjoyment by shimmying with renewed vigor.
Eventually, Rascal called us over to where he stood near the edge of the street. “It’s time for the big show, ladies!”
If I was nervous before Devin’s race, this time I was standing on an edge so sharp it could make someone bleed. A race shouldn’t be this important for me. I dropped into a squat and crossed both fingers behind my head anyway.
Beside me, Breanna took on the same stoic pose she’d had when Devin raced.
My pulse raced at the roar from the burnouts. When Jordan’s headlights flicked on, the Malibu took on an angry, menacing look. I held my breath as Vic jogged back and lifted his arms with the flashlight in his hand.
From my vantage point, I couldn’t see the light, but I knew the exact moment he hit it. Jordan’s dark, intimidating car shot like a bullet. He left the line barely a breath before Hunter’s truck, but that breath would be enough. Jordan didn’t lift the throttle, and the car stayed glued to the concrete. I hadn’t seen a pass that clean in a very long time.
I held my breath as they careened toward us on the cusp of losing control. The engines were so loud the sound shuddered in my chest and the telltale smell of alcohol laden fuel burned my nose. By a hundred feet Jordan was a fender out on Hunter and the same at six hundred feet. Jordan crossed the line first. That breath of an advantage at the start, his immediate reaction to the flashlight, had won that race. For those of us who had watched him race for years, it wasn’t a surprise.
“We got the Malibu by a fender!” Rascal called down the line, before joining us with celebratory hugs. At the start line, a raucous round of cheering echoed through the night.
Hunter blew by us, heading in the opposite direction.
“Someone’s not happy with that loss.” Brianna laughed and wiggled her hips.
My face was drawn to the sound of an approaching motor. The steady thump-thump increased to a loud whine as Jordan revved the engine, and the car broke sideways in celebration. Proof that my thrill of victory was mild in comparison to his.
Rascal hopped onto the lowered passenger window edge and gestured for us to do the same. Breanna made like she would move to go with them, but turned back to her truck.
“Go! I’ll bring the truck down.” I pushed her toward Jordan and the celebratory hijinks.
I caught Jordan’s eyes as she ran over, his face illuminated red by the gauges in his dash. More emotions passed between the two of us than I thought possible. I knew him, better than most people. I’d made a study of Jordan Slater for many years. Even chased after him like a lost puppy. His excitement for the victory was obvious, but so was a healthy dose of anger.
The anger thrilled me.
Abashed, I turned away quickly and all but ran to the truck. His anger shouldn’t have triggered a lusty tingle. It was that very tingle, that jolt of excitement that had caused me so many problems. That his anger with me lit a fuse of lust in my system, only proved I’d deserved every amount of pain I had caused myself. I wasn’t afraid of Jordan’s anger, I was excited by it. He wouldn’t hurt me. I’d figured out all too late, that not all angry men were as forgiving as Jordan was.
It took some doing to weave through the exiting traffic to the start line. When I finally did, the first person I saw was my brother’s wife. I’d done my best to avoid Wendy since being back. We’d never been friends and no amount of time nor distance would change that. She was still easily recognizable. Too much makeup and too much hair paired with far too little clothing. She stood on the outside of a group of women that looked like half a dozen Wendy clones.
She took a long drag of a cigarette, looking less pleased with her life than I was with mine. Silent, brooding anger pushed at my chest. My brother was a great guy, and she had a great life. Nothing would ever be good enough for a woman like Wendy.
Jordan’s sheer size made him easy to spot. I pulled to a stop just beside his trailer. He celebrated his win with fist bumps and bro hugs.
“When I heard you were back, I wondered if I’d see you here.” A familiar voice brought a smile to my face.
“Here I was wondering if you hadn’t bugged out already.” I hugged Hunter East through the open driver’s window of my sister’s truck.
One of the biggest differences between Jordan and Hunter was how long they held on to a loss. Jordan, a loss became a weight that pressed against him. While just as competitive, Hunter brushed them off far more quickly. Even now, he wore his smile as easily as he wore his tight white t-shirt.
“You look good, Rae.”
“Ha!” I had to laugh at that one. “You must be in a dry spell to say that. Y’all are lucky I even brushed my hair tonight.”
“Nah, you still look better than any other girl here.”
I blushed, I couldn’t help it. Hunter East was my type. Tall, muscled, with bright hazel eyes. Add in his love for fast cars and it was easy to understand that his presence at the truck was gaining attention and fast.
“Uh-oh.” He tweaked my nose. “Here comes your ‘daddy’ and he’s bringing friends.”
We’d caught Jordan’s attention, he, Vic, my brother, and a small horde of gear heads were fast approaching. Most guys would have split, cut and run in the other direction. Not Hunter, he was as big an adrenaline junky as any guy I knew. They were all cut from the same oily cloth.
“We should go out, what are you doing tonight?” There was a dare on his face.
I would have said no, the excuse was poised on my lips. I had enough problems with guys, I didn’t need to go looking for more.
“What’s up, East?” Jordan stopped at the bumper of the truck and crossed his arms across his chest.
He stopped short of asking me if I was all right. The obligatory eye roll came without thought. I had to stop myself from banging my head on the steering wheel. People could have drowned in the testosterone thickened air.
“Other than having a race snatched from me?” He grinned when Jordan didn’t take the bait. “Just catching up with an old friend.”
The last time I’d seen Jordan it hadn’t ended on the best note. His anger tonight had been quite apparent. I reached for the door handle, reading the emotion in his face and becoming annoyed because of it.
Beside Jordan, Aiden’s face stretched into a devil may care grin. He too was reading the situation, reading Jordan. Unlike me, Aiden was amped for it. If they weren’t racing, sex and fighting were probably the closest things to that rush any of them could get.
The door popped open as Hunter stepped back, interpreting Jordan’s silence for the challenge it was. Fear-edged adrenaline propelled me out of the truck. I slammed the door, but neither of the two muscle bound men paid me any heed.
“Jordan, how you gonna get mad? You’ve poached a race from me, I poach a girl from you. Sounds fair to me.” The muscles in Hunter’s neck grew more tense with each word. His smile didn’t reach his eyes.
Jordan moved with a speed that belied his size, but so did Hunter. Hunter took the shove to the chest like the football player he’d once been. The force of it would have sent most guys sprawling to the ground, but Hunter barely staggered. He took a half a step back before he went for Jordan.
“What the hell!”
Not for the first time in my life, I found myself standing right between two huge guys ready to rip each other’s throats out. The second I stepped out, Devin and Aiden reached for Jordan. Matt and one of Hunter’s friends grabbed him as well. Not because none of them wanted to see these two titans of the streets go at it, but because I stood between them.
A lot of things frightened me now. This didn’t at all. Who needed to go out in search of trouble, when you came home to this?
Jordan shook Devin off with ease and pointed a finger at Hunter. “I’m gonna fuck you up, boy.”
“Boy? That’s not what your girl said.” Hunter’s smile was bright and mean.
“Hunter! Shut up!” I hissed sharply.
I did the only thing I knew to do before there was blood all over the concrete, I went at Jordan. With a running jump, I shoved him with both hands. When he moved back two steps, I pushed him again. Aiden lost grip of the arm he’d had and it was only Jordan and me.
“Are you insane?” I screamed at him, as I continued to push the much bigger man backward.
Thick fingers were coiled into fists and his jaw was clenched with rage, but none of that stopped me. I backed him up the street in a way my brother and Devin had failed to do. In front of a big crowd of our peers, I was pushing the biggest guy away from the action.
I didn’t care if I was making a spectacle out of us. He’d started it, I was going to finish it. The anger from the night before, from years before, all seemed to come out of me at once. This was my life, to live my way. He wasn’t going to control it. I wasn’t going to let anyone control me again.
“Stay out of it, Rae,” he growled, but he wasn’t looking at me. He was looking past me to Hunter.
Hunter hadn’t given chase, no one had. Though they all watched intently, they all gave us our space. No one questioned if he would hurt me, they all knew better.
“Because he was poaching me?” I said with a desperate shrill. “You can’t poach what doesn’t belong to someone else.” I shoved him again, hard enough to have pain shooting up to my elbows.
This time he didn’t move, he stood stone still and stared at me with his nostrils flaring. We both panted, silence surrounding us. The only sound was when he spat with distaste at my feet.
I slapped him. It was not a moment I would ever be proud of. The sound of my palm cracking across his face echoed through the night. The black ball cap on his head slid sideways, letting me see his eyes fully for the first time. Barely controlled rage and contempt darkened them.
“I don’t belong to you, I don’t belong to Devin, I don’t belong to anyone but myself and you can all kiss my ass. I belong to me.”
I smacked the hat the rest of the way off his head as I fumed. There was a small twinge of disappointment when he didn’t flinch as I reached for him.
I had plenty of reasons to be afraid of Jordan in that moment, of any man really. His self-control had given me a false sense of security where big scary guys were concerned. For a moment, I recalled the pain that could be caused by that false sense of security, a newfound fear slid in place of my indignation. It was the flaring of his nostrils, the way his eyes lit with anger that was directed at me.
I’d seen that look before, but not from Jordan.
I’d seen that look in my dreams.
I was accomplished at hiding that part of myself, but he’d seen it before. I’d run from what he saw in me last night.
Slowly, he bent to retrieve his hat from the ground. “No Raelynn, you don’t.”
I knew the exact moment he saw my fear. He balked with a visible flinch and spun away from me, away from the fight. I was too angry for guilt. It was obvious he thought he’d scared me. I knew him well enough to know what that would do to him. For a moment, one selfish moment, I was glad he had a taste of that. I wanted him to hurt, payback for the way his rejection had hurt me that night years ago.
I spun and stalked back to the crowd that had gathered behind us.
“You okay, Rae?”
I looked up at Hunter, there was genuine concern on his face. I fisted my hands on my hips and changed my mind about his offer.
“Better than okay, give me a few minutes to change and you’ve got your date.”
He was grinning when I spun back to where my sister waited by the truck.
“Hey, Breanna, I need your shorts.”