Chapter Thirteen
Ainsley felt giddy with relief. For the first time in months, she had a real chance at happiness again, thanks to the extraordinary man who strolled by her side. Behind that sarcastic and sometimes arrogant façade lay a sensitive, thoughtful man who gave her everything she needed, including time and patience. Yet he asked for nothing in return but the chance to love her and be a father to her daughter.
That Royal indeed loved her and wanted her in his bed was no longer in doubt. Ainsley wanted that too, someday, and she would do everything she could to make that someday happen sooner rather than later. Whatever stood between them, she wanted it gone. She wanted to want Royal as much as he wanted her.
“What are you smiling at, lass?” he asked, tucking her close as they crossed the quiet street. There wasn’t a carriage or even a cart in sight, yet he guarded her as carefully as if she were the queen.
“It certainly wasn’t your description of the service rooms in that town house you viewed this morning,” she said. “As scintillating as that was.”
He gave her a crooked grin. “I realize you’re not very interested in cold rooms and pantries. We’ll find a butler to manage that end of things. I don’t want you bogged down with boring details if you’d rather not.”
“Royal, you do understand I was raised to manage large households, including country manors. I’m quite up to the task of running a small town house.”
“It won’t be that
small.”
She squeezed his arm. “Whatever it is, I’m sure it’ll be fine.”
He remained worried she would find it difficult to adjust to a life outside the highest echelons of the ton
. Though Ainsley was in fact heartily sick of that life, she suspected it might take a little time to convince him of that.
“If it wasn’t the anticipation of installing a bang-up-to-the-mark range in your new kitchen, what were you smiling at?” he asked.
“It’s going to sound rather silly.”
“Love, you’re marrying into a family with several exceedingly silly members, not to mention the dogs. You have a long way to go to challenge us.”
She laughed. “So true.”
“Then confess. If that smile has anything to do with me, I want to make sure I know how to prompt it as often as possible.”
When they stopped at the foot of the stone steps that led up to Kendrick House, Ainsley took Royal’s hands.
“For the first time in a very long time, I’m truly happy.” Her nose started to tickle a bit, which tended to happen when she became emotional. “And it’s because of you, Royal. I can never be grateful enough for everything you’ve done for me and Tira.”
He gently extracted his right hand and cupped her cheek. He’d stripped off his gloves back in the park, so she could feel the warmth of his palm, tough with calluses. That hand spoke of strength and hard work, and a man who would do whatever was necessary to provide for his family.
“Ainsley, your happiness is thanks enough.” His gaze swept over her face, warming with an appreciation that made her knees go wobbly. “For you and Tira to be happy and safe means everything to me.”
If she didn’t take a firm grip on her silly self, she’d burst into tears right on the stoop. But the emotions swirling through her—joy, gratitude, and so much more—seemed too big to contain.
“Och, lass,” he murmured, his malachite gaze sparking with heat, “if you’re not careful, I’ll be forced to kiss you right here.”
Ainsley was stunned when she giggled. As a rule, she abhorred giggling. And yet here she was, acting like a girl fresh from the schoolroom, engaging in her first innocent flirtation.
It was a marvel.
She placed a hand on his chest. “Mr. Kendrick, are you suggesting that we commit acts of public indecency? Someone might send for the constable to have us arrested.”
He covered her hand and pulled her even closer. “It would be worth it, especially if they put us in the same cell.”
When he leaned down to kiss her, her eyelids started to flutter shut. But she popped them up in surprise when the door opened behind them.
“Dammit.” Royal reluctantly pulled away.
She smothered a chuckle. “Perhaps we can go for another walk around the square after you get home from the warehouse this evening. It should be quite dark and deserted by then.”
“Don’t tempt me, lass. I don’t think you’re ready for what I want yet.”
She couldn’t help responding in a challenging tone. “Maybe I’ll surprise you, Mr. Kendrick.”
He flashed her a rogue’s grin before glancing up to the open door. His amusement quickly faded when he saw the youngest footman. “What is it, Will?”
William’s boyish features were tight with concern. “Ye’re both needed inside, sir, my lady.”
Ainsley’s heart thudded against her ribs. “Is Tira all right?”
“Aye, my lady, she’s fine. It’s just that ye have a visitor.”
“Who is it?” Royal asked as they hurried up the steps.
When William simply gave a grim shake of his head, Ainsley’s heart went to her knees. Then, as she saw Victoria standing in the hall, looking disturbed, her heart went straight through the heels of her half-boots.
“This is bad,” Ainsley whispered.
Royal helped her off with her pelisse. “Whatever it is, we’ll deal with it together.”
She looked into his calm gaze and her churning insides steadied a bit. “Promise?”
He took her hands and helped strip off her gloves. “I promise, love. You’re not alone anymore.”
Victoria came to them. “I’m sorry to surprise you this way, Ainsley, but your mother is here.”
“At Kendrick House?” She winced at the shrill note to her voice. “Is my father with her?”
“No.” Victoria grimaced. “Kade and I practically smashed into her when we got home. Her carriage was in front of the house, and her footman was just handing her out.”
Ainsley had to fight the sudden urge to be sick. “Did she see Tira?”
Victoria gave a grim nod.
“Dammit to hell,” Royal ground out. He took off his hat and handed it to the footman, dismissing him.
As William retreated, he threw Ainsley a worried glance, as if he knew exactly why they were all upset. Had everyone in the blasted household figured out she was Tira’s mother? If so, it was going to make it almost impossible to keep the secret any longer.
“Was Tira awake? Did my mother get a good look at her?”
“Tira was awake, but I’m not sure Lady Aldridge saw very much. Once I realized who she was, I handed Tira over to Kade and bustled them off to the nursery.”
Ainsley pressed her palms over her eyes for a moment, trying to quell her rising panic. “All right. Where is my mother?”
“With Nicholas in the drawing room. I thought it might be a good idea for him to speak with her before you arrived home.”
Royal nodded. “You mean you wanted Nick to intimidate her with his stern Highland laird manner. Not a bad plan.”
“My mother is not easily intimidated, unfortunately.” For her mother to show up like this was a very bad sign. It meant she would try to persuade Ainsley to return to London—or worse.
And if she’d gotten enough of a look at Tira . . .
“I’m so sorry,” Victoria said in an unhappy voice. “If I’d known your mother was coming, I would have taken Tira around to the back of the house.”
“It’s not your fault, Victoria. I had no idea she was coming either. Let me go in and try to find out what she knows.”
“I’ll come with you,” Royal said, starting her toward the drawing room door.
That was a very
bad idea, for too many reasons to count. “No,” she said, holding him back. “It’s best if Mamma and I speak alone, at least at first.”
Royal made an impatient sound. “I won’t have her bullying you, or forcing you to do something you don’t want to do.”
She mustered what she hoped was a reassuring smile. “You know by now that no one makes me do something I don’t want to do, not even my mother.”
Or her father, for that matter. But Ainsley was still tremendously grateful that Papa hadn’t come along. He could be incredibly stubborn and tended to yell when frustrated. That would have gone down very poorly with Royal.
“Are you sure, dearest?” Victoria asked. “Nicholas can stay with you, or I can come in, if you like.”
“Thank you, but my mother is no doubt upset and will not appreciate an audience.”
Royal muttered a few curses before escorting her to the door. “All right, but I’m staying right out here. If you need me, just call out.”
“Thank you.” Although she appreciated his protective instincts, Ainsley was terrified of what her mother might say, and even more terrified that Royal would hear it.
You should have told him the truth right away.
Ainsley squashed that panicked thought. The truth wouldn’t change anything, including how she and Royal felt about each other. Or how she felt about Cringlewood.
She squared her shoulders and nodded. Royal opened the door and then stepped back. As she walked by him, he pressed a quick, comforting hand to her shoulder.
His unquestioning support made her wretched with guilt.
Pausing for a moment after closing the door behind her, she worked to settle her tripping heartbeat. Then she adopted her best social smile and crossed the drawing room to join her mother and Lord Arnprior. They were seated opposite each other, the earl cool and imperious in his high-backed wing chair. Mamma looked like she had the fireplace poker up her backside as she perched on the edge of the chaise.
“Ah, Lady Ainsley,” Arnprior said, rising. “Your mother and I have been getting reacquainted while we waited for you.”
Her mother’s expression suggested she’d find a tooth extraction preferable to chatting with the laird—or setting foot in Scotland, for that matter. Her mother loathed the north.
“Thank you, sir.” Ainsley bent to press a kiss to her mother’s cheek. “I’m sorry, Mamma. If I’d known you’d be arriving today, I would not have gone out. Why didn’t you send me a note?”
Her mother allowed the kiss but made no move to touch her or display any sign of affection. “I arrived in the city late last night and did not have time to send a note around.”
Ainsley frowned. “Why didn’t you have your footman deliver a message to Breadie Manor first thing this morning? I didn’t leave the house till after breakfast.”
“I thought it best to go directly there, instead. I was surprised to discover you had already gone for the day.” Her mother flicked a disapproving glance in Arnprior’s direction. “I didn’t realize you were spending so much time at Kendrick House, my dear,” she said, making it sound like Ainsley was carousing in a pub down in the stews. “It is unfortunate that I had to chase after you.”
“We consider Lady Ainsley one of the family, madam,” the earl said in a matching tone of aristocratic hauteur. “She is welcome here anytime, day or night.”
“How kind,” Mamma intoned. “But need I point out—”
“Where are you staying, Mamma?” Ainsley hastily interrupted. “Next time just send a note, and I’ll come there right away.”
Her mother pressed her lips together for an irritated moment. “I am staying with Lady Montgomery.” She glanced at Arnprior. “Her ladyship is Lord Cringlewood’s cousin on his mother’s side. Our families are exceedingly close.”
Damn and blast.
They were clearly all lining up against her.
“Oh, that’s convenient,” Ainsley said lamely.
“Lady Ainsley, would you like me to ring for tea?” Arnprior asked in a kind voice.
“I have already declined refreshments, my lord,” Mamma said. “I only wish to speak to my daughter, alone and uninterrupted.”
Ainsley flushed at her mother’s rude behavior.
That’s what you sound like when you’re in a snit, my girl.
She made a silent vow to be much nicer from now on. In fact, she would make all sorts of vows to reform her behavior if it meant she and Tira could escape this latest crisis unscathed.
Arnprior pointedly ignored her mother. “Ainsley, would you like some tea?”
Her mother tsked her disapproval, although it wasn’t clear whether she objected to his patent disregard of her wishes or to his informal use of Ainsley’s name. No doubt both.
Ainsley gave him a grateful smile. “Thank you, sir, but I’ll just speak with my mother. I know luncheon is about to be served, so please go ahead without me.”
“There’s no rush,” he said. “And I’ll be happy to remain, if you prefer it.”
“I would not
prefer it,” Mamma said icily.
Ainsley briefly closed her eyes. Her mother was a high stickler, but she generally had distinguished manners. For her to be acting so out of character with an aristocrat meant she was thoroughly knocked off her pins.
The earl patiently waited for Ainsley to answer his question. Despite how awful this day was turning out to be, she felt enormous gratitude for his kindness. It would seem she had another supporter in the household, after all.
She shook her head. “Thank you, sir, but I’ll be fine.”
“As you wish. But I will be close by if you need me.”
“Along with everyone else,” Ainsley said ruefully.
His smile was brief and charming, and then he gave her mother a genial nod. “My lady, I hope to see you again soon.”
“I very much doubt that will be the case.”
Arnprior threw Ainsley an ironic look before departing the room.
“Really, Mamma, did you have to be so awful? Lord Arnprior was simply trying to be polite.”
“I have the headache,” her mother announced in a blighting tone.
Ainsley mentally sighed. Mamma was prone to headaches whenever she was upset, which always made things worse. This one was sure to be a whopper.
“I’m sorry you’re not feeling well. Are you sure you don’t want something to drink? Can I fetch you a headache powder?”
“Oh, Ainsley, stop fussing and do sit down. Staring up at you is making it worse.”
“Sorry.” Ainsley took the seat Arnprior had just vacated.
Her mother seemed to finally pull in her horns by managing a strained smile. “As I’m sure you can imagine, the last few days have been exceedingly stressful. You know how I hate traveling.”
She did look a trifle exhausted, but as lovely and elegant as always. Her mother possessed a slim, straight figure, and had black hair with dramatic white streaks at the temples. Like Ainsley, she had a blue-violet gaze that many considered her best feature, contributing to her fame as a great beauty. Those eyes were striking and unmistakable, a characteristic she now shared with her granddaughter.
Please, God. Don’t let her have seen Tira’s eyes.
“Did Papa travel with you?” Ainsley asked.
“No, I brought only Biddle.”
Biddle was Mamma’s longtime dresser and was devoted to her mistress but less than enamored with Ainsley. Biddle made a point of quietly conveying that whenever possible.
“Thank God,” her mother added in a bitter tone when Ainsley didn’t respond. “Your father is quite distraught over this business, so I felt it best he remain in London given his weak heart. I see now that I was right to insist on that.”
Ainsley struggled not to overreact. “It truly wasn’t necessary for you to come all this way, Mamma. You could have just replied to my letter.”
“You would not have listened. I had no choice but to come here to talk you out of making an inexplicably stupid and selfish decision. Before it is too late, I might add. Leonard’s patience will not last forever.”
“I don’t give a hang about Leonard’s bloody patience, Mamma. He raped
me. Do you actually understand that?”
Her mother flinched. “I beg you to refrain from using such extreme language. It’s neither appropriate nor accurate.”
“Not when it describes exactly
what happened?”
Mamma waved a hand. “It was an unfortunate misunderstanding, and for your sake I’m sorry for that. But there is no cause to exaggerate, nor is it helpful in the present situation.”
“There was no misunderstanding. I’m not going to marry Cringlewood and that’s the end of it.”
When her mother studied her with a narrowed, intent gaze, the hairs lifted on the back of Ainsley’s neck.
“Even though Leonard is the father of your child?” Mamma asked.
“I . . . I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she managed.
“I am not stupid, child. I saw her. That baby looks exactly like you did.”
Ainsley rose and stumbled over to sit beside her mother, grabbing her gloved hand. “You can’t tell anyone, Mamma. You can’t
.”
“Of course I cannot tell anyone. It’s too late to even acknowledge her.” Mamma dragged her hand free, as if repelled by her own daughter’s touch. “I should have known when you didn’t put up more of a fight about having to spend the winter with that wretched aunt of yours. I should have known something was wrong.”
Ainsley forced herself to ignore the hurt of her mother’s rejection. Right now, all that mattered was keeping Tira safe. “No one suspects, though? Not Papa, or anyone else?”
“No, thank God. Your father already feels entirely betrayed by your actions. If he knew about this, it would kill him.”
“I’ve done nothing to betray him or anyone else,” Ainsley retorted. “I’m only doing what is right for me and for my daughter. My actions are entirely appropriate under the circumstances.”
Her mother’s mouth twisted with disapproval. “Appropriate? There is nothing appropriate about allowing your fiancé to get you with child and then refusing to marry him. That is the exact opposite of appropriate.”
“I did not allow
him to do anything. Cringlewood forced himself on me. He’s a pig.”
“Leonard is a peer of the realm and a distinguished man,” her mother flashed. “Yes, he behaved in a manner unbecoming a gentleman, but that does not entitle you to act like a trollop in return.”
For several moments, Ainsley felt paralyzed. But she finally stiffened her spine and found her voice. “If that’s all you have to say, Mamma, I would ask you to leave now. I refuse to be insulted by you, or anyone else.”
Her mother pressed her fingertips hard to her temples before folding her hands in her lap. “I apologize for that uncharitable remark, Ainsley. My fatigue is getting the better of me, but I am simply trying to understand. How could you have done such a foolish thing, especially after discovering you were with child? You should have made the effort to reconcile with Leonard right away. Yes, it might have been awkward, but he would have no wish to embarrass you. Nor would he desire his child to be born a . . .”
“Bastard.”
“There is no need to be crude, my dear. You know I do not approve of such language.”
“My language is the least of our concerns, Mamma.”
Her mother mustered what she probably thought was an encouraging smile. “You’re right, of course. And I’m sure we can find a solution to this problem, if you will only be sensible.”
“What do you mean by sensible?” she asked, although she already had a fairly good idea.
“You must return to London with me and speak honestly with Leonard. I know he’ll be very sorry to hear how dismayed you were by that unfortunate incident, and he will wish to make amends. I’m sure he’ll be more than willing to start afresh.”
“Oh, that would be big of him.”
“Leonard loves you,” her mother insisted. “He always has.”
“He’s got an awful way of showing it.”
Mamma sat back with a sigh. “I suppose I should have expected you to be like this. It’s my fault, really. Mine and your father’s.”
“What does that mean?” Ainsley said, startled by her mother’s sudden shift.
“I’m afraid we allowed you far too much freedom when it came to decisions about your future. We simply spoiled you, child. It’s no wonder you don’t understand the consequences of your actions.”
“I understand enough to realize I don’t deserve a lifetime of mistreatment at Cringlewood’s hands.”
“That incident was a misunderstanding,” her mother stubbornly repeated. “If you would just talk to him, everything would be fine.”
“You seriously think he would also be fine about Tira?”
Her mother frowned. “What sort of name is that?”
“It’s a fine Scottish name.”
Her mother mulled that over for a few moments before answering. “You obviously cannot acknowledge the child as your own, so it doesn’t matter. Perhaps it’s best at this point not to tell Leonard about her at all. It will cause too many complications for everyone.”
“You can be sure I will not be telling him or anyone else in our family about Tira,” Ainsley said tartly.
Her mother rewarded her with a smile. “Excellent, my love. I’m so glad you’re finally coming to your senses.”
Ainsley had never thought her mother lacked a firm grip on reality until now. Still, for Tira’s sake, she had to make one last effort to get through to her. “Mamma, would you have married Papa if he had hurt you in that way? Because I truly cannot understand why you would wish me to marry a man who thought he was doing nothing wrong in forcing himself on me.”
“Do you truly believe I always desired your father’s marital attentions? There was many a night when I heartily wished the man would find his pleasures elsewhere than in my bed. In fact, I sometimes prayed for exactly that.” She flashed a bitter smile. “My prayers, unfortunately, were rarely answered.”
Ainsley blinked, stunned by that sad, ugly glimpse into her mother’s life. True, her parents had never been particularly affectionate, but Mamma and Papa had always seemed content with each other, presenting a united front to the rest of the family.
“Then why didn’t you just tell Papa that?” she asked.
Her mother stiffened. “I took vows on my wedding day to honor and obey my husband. That is what a decent and respectful woman does, something you should realize by now.”
Ainsley thought of the solemn promise Royal had made her only this morning—a vow to love and protect her and their daughter above all else. Even at the low tide of their friendship, when they could do nothing but snipe at each other, he’d always tried to protect her, even from herself. And he’d done it not for personal gain, but because he was a good, kind man.
It truly was as simple as that.
“I’m so sorry you had to suffer in that way, Mamma,” she finally said.
Her mother shrugged. “We all have unpleasant burdens to bear, my dear. I am serene in the knowledge that I have always done my duty to your father and to our family. I expect the same from you. Give up this foolishness and come home. Be what you were intended to be—Marchioness of Cringlewood and a great lady.”
Ainsley now realized her mother could never understand. Given what she’d just revealed, Mamma would naturally see her daughter’s defiance as a rejection of all the sacrifices she’d made for her family. Indeed, it would be a rejection of everything she believed in most dearly.
“I’m sorry to disappoint you, but no,” she said quietly.
“Then you will have betrayed all of us,” Mamma snapped. “And for what? For a penniless younger son from a Scottish family no one cares about?”
“As it happens, I care about the Kendricks a great deal. And it’s ridiculous to dismiss them as nobodies.”
“You will have nothing if you do this, Ainsley. Your father will cut you off without a shilling.” Mamma suddenly gave her a canny look. “Does Mr. Kendrick know that?”
“Of course he does, and he doesn’t care.”
Mamma stared for a few seconds but then pressed a hand to her eyes, suddenly looking quite ill.
“Are you all right?” Ainsley asked, touching her arm.
“Ainsley, the marquess is threatening to bring legal action against you,” she said as she lowered her hand. “For breach of promise of marriage. If he follows through, the scandal will be utterly appalling. God knows what it will do to your father, given the weak state of his heart.”
For a moment, Ainsley could only gape at her mother. She knew that breaking an engagement was a dreadfully serious business that could potentially damage one’s reputation—and financial prospects, if one of the parties was depending on a generous marriage settlement. Since Ainsley’s settlement was more than generous, Cringlewood would feel the sting of losing it. Still, he was a marquess
, for God’s sake, and a wealthy one at that.
She also knew that breach of promise suits were notoriously difficult and expensive to prosecute. It had to be nothing more than a stupid, mean-spirited threat on Cringlewood’s part.
“The marquess hates scandal as much as you and Papa do,” Ainsley said. “I cannot believe he would court it through legal action.”
“He hates scandal, but he hates being humiliated and cheated even more. You must
return home with me, or else he will proceed.”
Ainsley shook her head in disbelief. “But why does he care so much?”
“Some days I do wonder,” her mother said bitterly. “But the fact remains that you committed yourself to Leonard, and he rightly insists you honor that commitment, as do we. I should not have to tell you how damaging the consequences will be for all of us if you do not.”
At this point, Ainsley didn’t give a damn about herself or her family. But a court case, with all the attendant publicity, would shine a stark light on her actions over this past year and more. That ugliness would eventually find its way to Tira, exposing her to the world.
In fact, who was to say that her mother wouldn’t try to use the knowledge of Tira’s existence to force her hand? “Mamma, you cannot tell anyone
about my child,” Ainsley said, trying to steady her quavering voice.
“If you return home with me, there will be no need to do so.”
“I can’t do that.” Ainsley jumped to her feet, battling the urge to race upstairs, snatch her child, and flee with her to safety.
There’s no place safe.
Her mother stood. “You leave me no choice but—”
The door flew open. Royal stalked in, going straight to Ainsley.
“Is everything all right?” He curled a supportive arm around her shoulders even as he directed a hard gaze at her mother.
Ainsley’s knees quivered with an unholy combination of relief and panic, forcing her to lock them in place. “Yes, thank you. Mamma was just leaving.”
“I was doing nothing of the sort. Unless, that is, you are coming with me.”
“I will come see you later,” Ainsley said. “We can finish our conversation then.”
“When, exactly?”
“I . . . I’m not sure. Later.”
“That is not acceptable. We need to finish this discussion now.” She threw Royal a disdainful glance. “Alone.”
“Or, you can finish the discussion with me present. Would you prefer that, Ainsley?” Royal asked.
Ainsley did not
prefer. Royal would be furious with her for bringing such a horrific scandal down on their heads, one that could threaten Tira. Under the circumstances, Mamma might even be able to convince him that the best way to protect the child would be for Ainsley to return to London and marry Cringlewood, in exchange for promising to keep Tira’s existence a secret.
No, Royal would never do that to you.
Still, she needed a plan to hobble her tormentor before he left the gate. If she could do that, there would be no reason for Royal and the Kendricks to be dragged into embarrassing scandal and expensive legal machinations. Royal had forgiven her so much already, but even he had to have his limits.
Ainsley was done with testing men’s limits.
“I have no intention of discussing private family matters with you present, Mr. Kendrick,” Mamma said, glaring at him. “And take your hands off my daughter.”
Royal left his hands where they were. “Then since we have nothing further to discuss, I suggest you take your leave, my lady.”
Mortally offended, Mamma snatched up her reticule. “If you were a gentleman, you would encourage my daughter to return home, where she belongs.”
“Then it’s a good thing I’m not a gentleman.”
“You aren’t fit to marry her.”
His sudden smile was wry. “I am well aware, madam. Fortunately, Ainsley doesn’t seem to agree.”
“Mamma, please
go,” Ainsley said. “I’ll visit you later today, I promise.”
For several long seconds, their gazes clashed, her mother clearly reluctant to cede ground.
“May I escort you to your carriage, Lady Aldridge?” Royal asked, holding out a polite but firm hand.
Mamma ignored him. “Do not fail me, Ainsley.”
She turned and stalked to the door, where Victoria now hovered. But Mamma brushed past her without saying a word.
“Here, love, sit down,” Royal murmured as he guided Ainsley back to the chair. He crouched down in front of her, chafing her hands.
Victoria hurried over. “Does she know about Tira?”
Ainsley nodded, her dismay choking her.
“Do you think she’ll tell anyone?” Royal asked in a calm tone.
“Probably,” she whispered.
Victoria grimaced. “What do you think we should do?”
Suddenly, Ainsley knew exactly what to do. The answer was so simple it was almost laughable.
She took Royal’s hand and met his concerned gaze. “We should get married, of course. This very day.”