Maddie
I looked at the clock in the living room. It was 9:30 p.m. The men were still not home. I grew worried as each minute ticked by.
I hoped that tonight was the night they would bring Ayla home.
So I sat on the sofa in my nightdress with my robe around me. I waited. I prayed that by some miracle Ayla was going to appear in front of me, safe and sound.
But again, tonight that wasn’t the case.
The men walked through the doors, and I jumped to my feet, looking wildly around them for any sight of Ayla. When I saw their heads hung down, their shoulder sagged with yet another night filled with defeat, my throat closed up.
My chest tightened, and I almost fell to the ground. Despair filled me, and my cheeks were already wet with my tears.
I cried as Alessio walked past me without a word. A few minutes later when his roar of pain echoed around the house, I sobbed.
Nikolay walked away. And then Viktor. No one said a word.
Phoenix stayed at the door, his face drawn in with sorrow. That was when I noticed the blood on him. My eyes widened, and I scrambled toward him in panic.
“Phoenix!” I gasped, my arms moving over his body, looking for the wound. “What happened to you?”
My tears blurred my vision. With the thought of Ayla in pain and now Phoenix being hurt, I was slowly going crazy.
He grabbed my hand, holding it still over his chest. “Shhh…I’m okay, Maddie. It’s not my blood.”
He palmed my cheek, softly rubbing his thumb over the skin. I should have pulled away. It was wrong for him to touch me like that. It was more wrong for me to care the way I did.
But I found that I couldn’t move away.
“You’re not hurt?” I whispered, looking at his blood-covered suit.
He shook his head. “No.”
The air left my body in a loud whoosh, and I sighed in relief. But the relief was short-lived when I heard Artur’s voice behind me.
My eyes went wide, and I quickly pulled away from Phoenix. He didn’t let go of my head.
I turned my head to see Artur staring at us. His eyes showed what he felt. He looked at me as if I betrayed him.
My heart ached at the thought of hurting Artur. Looking back at Phoenix, our gazes met. He begged me with his eyes.
But I couldn’t give him what he wanted.
I glanced down at our intertwined hands and slowly pulled away. He grasped me more firmly, but I twisted my hand until I was free. Without looking at him, I stepped back and turned toward Artur.
I walked straight into Artur’s arm and buried my face into his chest. Taking a deep breath, I inhaled his familiar scent. This was what I needed.
He swept me up in his arms and carried me to his room. As soon as the door closed behind us, he had me against the wall, his lips on mine.
Artur kissed me furiously as he pushed us toward the bed. I fell down on the soft mattress as he settled on top of me. Before I could think, he had me out of my nightdress until I laid bare underneath him.
His kiss was bruising, his hands hard against my skin. His touch wasn’t searching. He didn’t touch me to bring me pleasure.
Artur seemed almost lost in his mind.
“Artur?” I questioned.
He didn’t answer. Instead, he continued to trail kisses down my neck. I should have felt good, but this time, I just felt cold. Almost disconnected.
“Artur? What are you doing?”
When he ignored me, my panic grew, and I pushed against his shoulders. “Artur, stop.”
He didn’t. He kept kissing down my stomach until his face was between my legs. The Artur touching my body wasn’t him.
My nails dug into his shoulder as I pushed him hard. “Artur, stop!” I called out louder.
His head snapped up, his eyes laced with a mixture of lust and anger. He looked confused for a second and then cocked his head to the side, giving me a heated look.
“You’re scaring me. What’s wrong with you?” I said, pulling away from him. I grabbed the comforter and pulled it to cover my body.
His expression changed to a remorseful one, his eyes flashing with regret. Artur raked his fingers through his hair almost angrily, although this time he appeared angry at himself.
“Talk to me,” I begged, looking at the man I loved struggle with something inside his head.
He flopped down on the bed beside me, staring at the ceiling. Rubbing a hand over his face, a small growl vibrated through his chest.
“Fuck! I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Maddie. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. It drives me fucking crazy when I see him touching you,” he replied through clenched teeth. “His hands were on you, and I wanted to slice them off his body.”
The image made me go cold. “Artur,” I snapped.
He turned to face me. We stared at each other in silence before he finally brought his hand up. He palmed my cheek gently, a soft look in his eyes.
“I hate that he had you first,” he whispered.
I flinched at the reminder and pulled away from him. “You promised that you would never bring this up. It’s in the past. Leave it there, Artur. You have me now. I chose you.”
“I know,” he murmured.
“Then stop thinking so hard. Please, Artur. Don’t let Phoenix get between us. I left him in the past, and you need to do the same thing,” I begged.
Even as I said the words, my mind screamed lies. Did I really leave Phoenix in the past? Was I really over him?
I loved Artur. I chose him.
But when I thought Phoenix was hurt tonight, it felt like my heart was going to split into two. How was it possible to still feel that way after so many years?
“I’m sorry, Maddie.”
I stared down at Artur and felt my heart expand just a little bit more. This man has stood beside me when I needed him the most—when Phoenix wasn’t there for me.
Artur was there for me when Phoenix left me broken.
Leaning forward, I kissed Artur slowly. He groaned into my lips and returned the kiss with the same fervor. When I pulled away, a small smile played across my lips. My heart didn’t feel as heavy anymore.
Moving my fingers through his hair, I smiled down at him. “I need the bathroom. Be right back,” I mumbled before jumping off the bed.
I closed the door behind me and went to the sink. Staring at my reflection, I quickly combed my hair. And then washed my face.
I wrapped the white robe around me and took a deep breath.
I pushed hard…harder than before. I pushed Phoenix out of my head and heart. I refused to think of him. Of us.
Artur was the one I needed. The man I loved. Now I just needed the courage to tell him. I had dragged this out for too long. He needed to know how I truly felt.
Since Ayla’s kidnapping, we had drifted apart, but I needed us again.
I also learned that love shouldn’t be kept to ourselves. Alessio and Ayla loved each other, but they never had the chance to say it. My heart ached for them, for what both of them were going through.
I didn’t want the same between Artur and me.
We didn’t need the words, but I wanted to say it. I didn’t want Artur to think that I didn’t love him enough. He had to know how much he meant to me.
Because anyway, we were about to take another step in life. Together.
Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath. When I felt my racing heart start to calm down, I opened my eyes and smiled at my reflection.
Without a second glance, I opened the door but stopped dead in my tracks. My heart stammered to a stop.
“Don’t worry. They won’t find Ayla.”
My eyes widened, and I stayed completely silent. I was even scared to breathe. Artur’s back was to me as he faced the windows, his phone next to his ear.
My chest tightened when he continued to talk. “It’s been almost four months, and they still haven’t found her. All thanks to me.”
My fists tightened. No. This couldn’t be happening. Not Artur.
He listened to the other person and then replied, “I know how to do my job. I’ll make sure they don’t find you.”
Even though he was whispering, the words echoed through my ears loudly. My heart raced and pounded like a drum. The veins in my neck throbbed as my body grew cold with panic.
And anger. So much anger. The fury built up inside of me like hot lava until I was ready to explode.
“I have to go. Don’t call me again. It’s too much of a risk,” he mumbled before hanging up.
I stayed partially hidden behind the door, my legs feeling suddenly weak.
Artur was the traitor?
I didn’t want to believe it. My mind fought violently against me. It couldn’t be true. I tried to force the thought out of my mind, but how could I when the truth was right there in front of me?
I heard him talk. He admitted it clearly. How did I not see that before? How did I miss it?
Tears of anger and frustration blurred my vision. But I was also hurting at the thought of Ayla being in pain because of the man I loved.
The bastard. How could he?
Alessio would never let him live. Hell, I wouldn’t let him live.
Stepping forward, I marched toward Artur. He heard my footsteps and quickly swiveled around, surprise evident on his face.
“Maddie?” He swallowed nervously but quickly hid it with a seductive smile.
When I stopped in front of him, I drew my fist back before slamming it in his nose. “You fucking asshole.”
He stumbled back in surprise before quickly straightening up. His eyes went wide. “What the fuck, Maddie?”
“I heard you,” I hissed. There was a flash of horror on his face, but it was quickly gone, and he regained his composure.
“What are you talking about?” he asked, feigning innocence.
That little shit. It wasn’t going to work on me. I raged inside. My skin prickled with it, like flame dancing underneath. My body shook with my fury.
“Don’t act innocent, Artur. You are crazy!”
The innocence façade was suddenly gone, and he glared down at me. “Keep your voice down.”
I scoffed and took a step back. “You betrayed us,” I said to him.
When he didn’t even convince me otherwise, I laughed humorlessly even though the tears spilled down my cheeks. “How could you?” I choked. “After everything Alessio has done for you, this is how you repay him?”
His face was a mask of rage. “He didn’t do anything for me!”
I stumbled back from his outburst. “You are so stupid. Why? Why did you do it?”
“Is that really a question, Maddie? You’re acting like the stupid one here,” he hissed.
My eyes widened when realization dawned. “God, I am so disgusted right now. Your father was a traitor, and so are you!”
“He killed my father!”
“Because he was a traitor! And Alessio pitied you. You were left on the streets to die, and he gave you a home. He thought you were different. He trusted you,” I argued past the lump in my throat.
Shaking my head, I took several steps back. “You made him trust you. Was that your plan all along?”
When he didn’t say anything in reply, I had my answer.
“You disgust me!” I spat at him.
I swiveled around to walk out of the room, but Artur’s voice stopped me. “Where are you going?”
Turning back around, I leveled him a glare. “Away from you! I can’t even look at you right now.”
He was a traitor, but I wasn’t. If he thought I would keep quiet, then he was so wrong.
I was in pain at Artur’s betrayal. It was hard to breathe, but it only got harder when he reached behind his back and pulled his gun out.
He pointed it at me. “Another step and I will shoot you.”
Fear slithered its way through my body, and sweat broke out on my skin. I stood frozen, debating if I should make a run for it.
Artur glanced between us, and his expression softened just a little. “Maddie, I don’t want to hurt you.”
A sob escaped my lips. “Betraying my family hurts me, Artur. This is hurting me more than you can ever think.”
Regret flashed across his face. “Maddie…”
My sniffles filled the room. I rubbed my chest, trying to get rid of the ache there. “What about Ayla? What did she ever do to you? How could you do this to her?”
Artur shook his head. “She just happened to be in the middle. Alberto wanted her, and I wanted my revenge against Alessio. He was invincible, but then Ayla came into his life. She’s his weakness. What better way to destroy Alessio than destroy his only weakness?”
I gasped at his cruel words. Never had I expected to hear such words for Artur. Where was the sweet man I knew?
My shaking began again, only this time it was a mixture of fear and anger. Anger at Artur for being so heartless. “Ayla is innocent. You condemn her to the very monster that destroyed her. You knew the things that were done to her, yet you still sent her there.”
Artur shrugged. “It was two birds with one stone.”
“She doesn’t deserve this. What you have done to her is enough to make me hate you with everything that I am.” My voice was filled with hatred and utter despair.
My skin felt raw as panic coursed through my body. I felt suddenly dizzy as the world tilted around me. I had to get to Alessio.
I moved a step back, but Artur caught it. His eyes widened. “Maddie, don’t make me do this,” he warned, his eyes begging me.
In that moment, I wondered if he really would shoot me. The thoughts accelerated in my head. My heart hammered in my chest, and my stomach rolled. As my stomach tightened painfully, I knew I was going to be sick.
I glanced beside me toward the dresser. My gun. Just a few steps and I could reach for my gun. I glanced back at Artur and thought of ways to divert his attention.
Licking my dried lips, I swallowed past the heavy lump in my throat. “What about us? Did you ever love me, Artur, or was that fake too?”
He quickly shook his head. I saw his arm drop just a little. “No. We are real, Maddie,” he admitted in a quiet voice.
I took a step toward the dresser. He didn’t seem to notice, so I kept talking. “What will happen now? To us? To me?”
The tears fell down my cheek as I waited for his answer.
“Come with me. Run away with me, Maddie,” he replied. His voice was so soft, sweet even, as if he was making love to me.
Another step toward the dresser.
But this time he noticed, and the gun was pointed directly at me again. “Don’t move, Maddie. Don’t make me hurt you.”
I was only two steps away from the dresser—from my gun. My hands shook by my side as my stomach lurched with tension.
“Will you really shoot me?” I asked, my body slowly starting to go numb.
I took another step. Artur didn’t answer.
But when a gunshot rang through the room, I had my answer.
I didn’t feel it at first. I stumbled back when the bullet made contact with my body. But I was too surprised to feel it.
One second passed. Two. Three.
And then I was hurting all over. My shoulder burned like it was on fire. My skin felt raw, and I almost retched as pain raked through my shoulder and traveled down the length of my spine.
I looked at the left side of my shoulder, where blood poured through my robe and the bullet had pierced my skin.
Artur made a regretful moan. I looked up to see him stepping toward the open window. Knowing that he intended to do, I jumped into action.
Adrenaline pumped through my body, and I reached for the drawer, pulling my gun out. I pointed it at him at the same time as another gunshot echoed around the room.
As a second bullet pierced my body, I fell to my knees. Pain. So much pain. It was an excruciating burning sensation, and this time I felt it in my stomach. I looked down to see my robe quickly getting soaked with my blood.
No. Please no.
I was frozen on the spot, and my body continued to pulse in agony. I was quickly losing blood. It wasn’t just my body hurting. My heart and soul had shattered in that moment.
I cried out as my body convulsed in pain. I felt warm. Too warm. I was burning. My vision blurred in front of me and I called out.
“Alessio!”
I saw Artur quickly moving toward the window. Acting on reflex, I pointed my gun and pulled the trigger.
I missed.
The bullet hit the window, and the glass shattered, throwing shards everywhere in the room.
Artur climbed out of the window, and as I fell on the ground, curling into a fetal position, I screamed again.
“Alessio!”
My heart stuttered a few times. When I saw Alessio running inside the room, followed by the others, I didn’t know whether to cry or be relieved.
There were gasps of surprise and looks of shock. Alessio knelt down beside me and pulled me into his arms. “Maddie?” he choked.
“Artur…” I gasped through the pain. “He…is…the…the…traitor…spy…”
Alessio’s expression thundered with fury. I kept talking, knowing I had little time left.
“He…knows,” I broke off when a fiery pain coursed through my body. I felt blood dribble in the corner of my lips.
I was going to die. Tears slid down my cheeks as I tried to speak. “He…knows…where…Ayla…is…”
Alessio bellowed something. I saw Viktor running out of the room. Nikolay jumped out of the window.
I stared back at Alessio, this time my body shaking with how heavy my sobbing was. Placing my hand over my stomach, right over where the bullet went through, I closed my eyes.
“My…baby…”
My heart had shattered the moment I realized I would never see my baby. I only found out the day before. But now, I had lost him before I even had a chance to see him.
I didn’t even know if I was having a girl or a boy. It was too early.
Opening my eyes again, I saw Alessio staring at me with a horrified expression. “Baby…my…baby…” I cried in his arms.
Behind his back, I saw Phoenix running into the room, followed by my mother. His face was a mask of horror as he ran to me, falling down to his knees next to Alessio.
He pulled me out of Alessio’s arm, who stayed frozen, his eyes empty and soulless. He was in shock.
I looked away from Alessio and up at Phoenix. When I saw tears in his eyes, my already bruised heart broke a little more.
I had never seen Phoenix cry. Ever. But right there in front of my eyes, I saw him break.
“Maddie,” he choked, pulling me to his chest. “Where’s Sam?” he bellowed.
“Maddie, hang in there. Okay? I’m right here,” he said against my cheek.
My fingers tightened around my stomach as the pain intensified until I found it harder and harder to breathe.
Phoenix placed kisses over my face, and I cried silently.
I was stupid…so so stupid.
“Don’t leave me, Maddie,” Phoenix whispered, kissing my lips gently.
Why did I stay away from him for so long? Why did we break each other?
My heart continued to ache as blackness slowly surrounded me, pulling me further under.
I brought my hand up and cupped his cheek. I tried to smile.
I wanted to give him my smile. He loved my smile.
But my lips felt stiff. I tried to speak, to tell him the truth.
Staring into his eyes, I pressed my palm against his cheek, willing him to understand what I couldn’t say.
I love—
My hand fell away, too weak to hold it up any longer. I lost sight of Phoenix and everything else as I was thrown into pitch blackness.
I went numb. All feelings were gone. Nothing hurt…I felt nothing.
As I succumbed to oblivion, I wished I had a chance to say those words to the man I truly loved.
I love you.