CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
I hated that I had given my phone up to Gretchen upon my return to the show. I desperately needed to talk to Lauren or Kennedy. Aiden was being very sweet through all this drama. Almost too sweet. I kept thinking about Kennedy’s warnings not to trust him, and then Shep’s about him not being the man I thought he was. I had to be overreacting. He trusted me; that was all.
That was a good thing, right?
Shep had cornered me after filming one afternoon to discuss the tabloids and the source they had mentioned. “Have you seen Aiden talking to anyone on the crew?” he asked.
I didn’t know what that had to do with anything. “The source was probably made up.” I hugged myself tightly, feeling uncomfortable at being alone with him again.
“I just don’t trust him, Claire,” he said, his dark eyes filled with concern. “Someone had to know we’d be found together in Boston.”
“I didn’t tell anyone but Gretchen where I was going. After I left, I don’t know who she told, although everyone was asking about my friend when I got back, so she at least told them I’d had some sort of emergency.” I chewed my bottom lip, trying to remember anything else. “As far as Aiden and the crew, the only one he talks to is Lance, the cameraman.”
As I sat in my camper reliving our talk and all that had happened the past couple days, someone tapped on my door. I opened it to find Elle standing there holding a six-pack of bottled beer.
“Oh. I could use one of those,” I said, reaching for the carton.
Elle sat down on my bed while I pushed the beers into my fridge and pulled out two. I handed her one and sat down on the chair by my table and twisted off the cap. She watched me guzzle half of my beer down and then sighed. “I’m sorry you’re going through all this,” she said.
“Thanks.” My eyes focused on the bottle, reading the details on the label.
“I’m also sorry I haven’t been around much,” she added.
“It’s okay, I didn’t take it personally,” I told her. “It’s a competition, right?”
Elle laughed and took a long sip of her beer. “Yes, it is, but it feels more like a soap opera at times.”
I laughed at her comment, and it felt good to release some of the tension I’d been holding. She smiled at me in the same way she used to and everything felt normal again. Just two girls drinking beers, chatting.
“So, what happened in Boston anyways?” Elle asked, and the happiness melted away.
I finished my beer and reached for another, unsure what to do or say. I met her eyes and could see her anticipation flowing from her pores.
Shit.
Would it really hurt to talk about this? It wasn’t like anything was a secret anyway. Plus, I needed someone to talk to, and since I couldn’t contact Lauren or Kennedy, Elle would have to do.
She listened intently as I told her about Shep showing up at the hospital. She opened her second beer as I continued my story, telling her how Shep confessed his feelings for me before Lauren and Asher showed up to save me from the awkwardness of the conversation.
“Why was he in your room?” she asked coolly.
“The marathon had the town booked up. I had a suite, paid for by Asher, and I was his ride to the airport, so I felt it was harmless. Plus, that agreement was made before he told me about his feelings.”
“So, if he’d confessed first, you would have let him sleep in the car?” Elle asked, with amusement in her voice.
I hadn’t really thought about it, but as she said it, I knew things would have been the same. I wouldn’t have turned Shep away to sleep in the car or under a bridge that night, regardless of what he had confessed or when.
“No, I guess not,” I admitted.
“So, you slept in your room, and he was on the couch?” she pressed.
“Eventually,” I answered.
“Eventually?” Elle pushed for more information.
I took a deep breath and finished my second beer. “Yes, things got a little heated at first,” I murmured. God, it felt good to get the secret out.
Her eyes widened even further, and her lips pushed into an ‘o’ as I told her about our exploit on the couch.
“Why didn’t you sleep with him?”
“Two reasons. One, he’s a judge, and I don’t want to win through favoritism.”
“And the other reason?”
“Aiden,” I said softly.
“But everyone thinks you did anyway, so you should have at least had some fun,” Elle insisted.
“But I would have known, and I couldn’t have faced Aiden if I had,” I said, feeling the guilt pressing me down again.
Elle stood up, a bright smile on her face. “You need to get out of here and quit sulking.”
I hunkered down further in my chair. “No, I don’t really feel like it.”
She pouted. “You sure?”
It felt good to get my story off my chest, but I still couldn’t help but wonder if I could truly trust Elle. She continued to urge me to tag along, leave the farm and find an adventure, but I knew how her adventures ended; with me walking home in the dark alone.
“No, I really think I just want to stay in. You go ahead and have fun,” I insisted.
Elle took the last swig of her beer and tossed the bottle in the trash can. “You can’t beat yourself up forever, Claire,” she said. “People aren’t perfect.”