Our conversation hit a comfortable silence. I looked around and wondered if that moment was even real. There was a full moon that night. It was big, bright and beautiful. Around it, twinkling stars filled the rest of the deep, dark sky. The moon lit up a path along the rippling ocean water. There was a cool breeze and the sound of crashing waves filled the silence. Even with the cool ocean air, I felt warm because I was tucked in close, under the arm of quite possibly the most handsome man I’d ever met in my life.

Is this real? I thought.

It felt too perfect. I was too happy. I’d spent my whole life telling myself I deserved less, and now I was getting everything I could dream of.

“What was that?” Kane said. I must have spoken out loud.

“I didn’t say anything,” I said, hoping he’d buy it.

“Isn’t the ocean incredible,” he said. “It’s as if it remembers everything, so you don’t have to.”

I looked at him and wondered what he was thinking to say that.

“How long have you lived here?” I said.

“Born and raised.”

“I guess that qualifies you as the welcoming committee.”

He looked at me, confused by what I meant.

“Although you take quite the non-traditional approach,” I blurted without thinking. “I mean, most committees drop off a gift basket. You drop your pants in the ladies room.”

As soon as the words came out of my mouth, I knew I was being rude. Only a part of me regretted it though. Sure, the sex was amazing, and I was having a really nice night with him, but there was still a nagging part of me that wondered how many women he’d done this with.

“Hey now,” he said, turning to face me. He didn’t instantly deny it. Now I regretted it. It was one of those questions I shouldn’t have asked if I didn’t really want to hear the answer.

I wouldn’t have been surprised at all if my fears were true. Men are able to fuck a lot of women. Matt made that clear enough.

I’d be kidding myself to assume Kane was any different. Of course I wasn’t the first woman he’d had some fun with, before taking her down to the beach for a romantic cuddle. I could just imagine how many women had sat right where I was seated, feeling warm and safe against his body.

“What happened earlier in the brewery, that was all your fault, Meadow,” he said.

“Excuse me? My fault? You’re the one who practically pushed me through the door,” I shot back.

“I know. But you gave me no choice.”

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. My fault?

I sure as hell wasn’t the perfect surfer babe with the perfect beach body and perfect beach hair and every girl in town lusting after me!

“The second I caught a glimpse of your perfect ass, your sexy curves, your number was up. No way this was ending any other way than my getting inside your sweet body.”  

“Well, aren’t you the charming one?” I said, getting more upset than I meant to. “First you make me feel fat, then you humiliate me in front of the entire town. Then you tell me to go home.”

“Meadow,” Kane said, holding me tighter. “I know. I’m sorry for all that. Believe me. I’ve got issues.”

“Are you really sorry?”

“Totally sorry. If I could take all that back I would in a heartbeat. It’s just …”.

“Just what?”

“It’s been so long since I was taken this way by a woman. And last time it ended so badly. I was fighting my feelings for you.”

There was so much I wanted to ask him about that but he kept talking before I could say anything.

“When I saw you in the brewery last night, some emotion overpowered me.”

I looked at him, waiting to see where he was going with this.

“And then when you came in again tonight with Sandra, you had so much light in your eyes, so much joy, I couldn’t take my eyes off you. I had to do something about it.

His words made me melt. I couldn’t believe that he’d noticed me that way. That I’d had such a powerful effect on him. I was still in disbelief that any of this was real.

“When I saw you by the washroom, it was game over. My urges got the best of me. I had to have you. I had to taste you. Right then and there.”

I wanted to believe him but there was still that nagging, skeptical part of me that was terrified of being hurt again.

“I don’t know,” I said. “Are you sure you’re not the type to take every hot girl in town down here to look at the moon and take her panties off.”

“You’re not very good at taking compliments, are you Meadow?” he said with a sly grin. “Besides, I didn’t have to take you any further than that alley to get your panties off!”

I hit him playfully on the arm.

“Don’t tease me.”

“Sorry.”

“So why are we here at all? If you already got what you wanted.”

“Oh come on. I brought you here so you can tell me something about yourself. I want to do more than fuck you. I want to get to know you. Then I want to fuck you again,” he said with a sly smile. “Then get to know even more about you. And then… .”

“Fuck me again,” I laughed. “I get it.”

“In so many positions, Meadow. You won’t regret it. The things I have in mind.”

I tried not to smile but I couldn’t help it. Before I could come up with some more challenging questions for him, he silenced me with the most tender, delicious kiss.

I so wanted to believe everything he was saying, but hadn’t he just told Paul he had no intentions of getting mixed up with another woman?

I broke away from our kiss.

“So explain this to me,” I said, not done being difficult. “First you say you’re avoiding women, and now you’re saying you want to spend more time with me. Which am I supposed to believe?”

“Meadow! It’s complicated! What can I say? I swear I have no intentions of hurting you. I swear I’m not using you. But I don’t know what’s going to happen after tonight. No one does. All I know is that right now, I love sitting right here, next to you, and there’s no where on earth I’d rather be.”

I nodded. “I’m sorry I’m being so difficult. If you knew more about me, it would make sense.”

“So tell me more about you.”

“How about we just enjoy right here, right now instead?”  

Kane smiled. “Fair enough.”

I could tell he liked that I turned his own words on him.

“But will you do me one favor, Meadow?”

“Depends,”  I said, looking at the crashing waves. He gently moved my face towards him and looked into my eyes.

“Believe me when I tell you how beautiful you are.”

His eyes never broke contact with mine as he said those words to me. He meant it. I could tell.

Men were always telling me I was perfect and beautiful, but they never actually thought about what they were saying. They never actually meant it. Kane meant it. He saw me. I felt the connection between us.

My stomach filled with butterflies and I was left speechless. His words meant so much to me and I leaned forward to kiss him so that he knew it. This time, our kiss felt different. It was more than just our lips that were connecting.

A cool breeze passed over us and I shivered slightly. Kane moved to sit behind me, his legs on either side wrapping me up tightly and keeping me warm. Despite my reluctance, deep down I knew I could trust him. I was safe with him.

“It’s just that my husband …” I started to say.

“Your husband?” he said, cutting me off mid-sentence and removing his arms from around me.

“My ex-husband,” I quickly clarified.

I only relaxed again when I felt his arms return around me.

“He was a cheater. He cheated on me for years. With so many women.”

“He sounds like a piece of shit,” Kane said.

“That’s an understatement. At first it was just random affairs with women when he was away for work. But gradually they grew more serious. The last woman he was with was a full on relationship. He was leading a double life. She didn’t even know he was married.” “I don’t understand how people can do that. Lead double lives, I mean. It seems exhausting and like it’s just asking for trouble. I’ve always been a one woman man, Meadow. That’s something I know about myself. When I’m with a woman, she’s my entire universe. I’m not kidding.”

I didn’t want to look at him for fear he’d see dreamy little hearts form in the pupils of my eyes. Prior to him saying that, I had convinced myself that there wasn’t a man on earth who thought that way anymore.

“I put up with my husband’s cheating until this last woman. Once I realized he was in love with her, I just snapped.”

“You mean, you knew about his cheating before?”

“Yup.”

“And you said nothing?”

“Nope.”

“Why not? You should have cut off his dick and mailed it to his mother so she knew what a bad job she did. You don’t deserve a man like that. No woman does.”

“I was too scared to admit it to myself. I was terrified. It was like, as long as I didn’t bring it up, it wasn’t really real. He gave me everything. Well, everything money can buy. He provided for me and I was paralyzed with fear at the thought of having to be on my own.”

“You’re on your own now, and you’re doing great,” he said, squeezing me tight.

“Haha, yeah, it’s been a real solid twenty-four hours of independent woman power.”

“Hang on. You left him yesterday?” Kane said in shock.

“Yup.”

“Jeez. Well that certainly explains why you’re feeling so fragile. So what, you called him out for cheating yesterday and left him in your dust?”

“Not technically. I called him out months ago, but to my surprise, he actually ended it with the other woman and begged me to stay. He made promises to be a better man. He promised we’d finally have the baby I’d been begging for. He gave me expensive gifts and promised I’d never have to worry again.”

“Big promises.”

“I stayed on a trial basis, but I knew in my heart it was over. It was never real to begin with. Well, I thought it was, otherwise I never would have married him. But his cheating started weeks after we got married, and it never stopped. With each affair he proved he loved me less and less. All his promises were empty and broken, just like our marriage.”

“I hate that you stayed with him through all that. Sounds like you’ve been robbed of knowing what a real man’s love should feel like.”

“Tell me about it.”

“So, why yesterday? What made you finally leave?”

“Well, speaking of fragile moods. Remember this morning when you saw me at the café?” I said, reaching into my purse for my phone.

“Yeah.”  

“I’d just been crying.”

“I could tell. I’m actually slightly relieved to know I’m not one-hundred percent responsible for all your tears in the last twenty-four hours.”

We both laughed and I opened the emails on my phone.

“Just before you arrived, I watched this video some guys sent me. I don’t know who they are, where they came from, or how they knew Matt, but yesterday these four big, bad looking guys showed up at our home in Palo Alto. They were looking for Matt. They knew he was a cheater and a liar and told me I deserved better. It was strange. For years I knew it, but it was like I needed to hear it from those guys before I believed it.”

“They’re right.”

“Anyway. Long story short, in a daze, I handed them my wedding band and let them into my home to find Matt. Then I just got in my car and drove away. I didn’t look back once.”

I held up my phone and hit play. I couldn’t believe what I was about to show him. It was so personal. I wondered if it might even scare him off, giving him a glimpse into my dramatic soap opera life. Part of me was dying to share it with someone though. It was still so surreal.

We watched as the camera followed the men down the hall to my bedroom. As soon as the door was broken open and there was a clear view of Matt, I felt my eyes fill with tears. Kane took the phone from my hands and pressed pause.

“Is that him? Is that your cheating fuck face ex?”

I wiped my tears and nodded. Kane held the phone up closer to his face and got a better look at Matt.

“Do they kill him? They look like tough guys. I hope they killed him.”

“No. They just made him strip naked,” I said, tears mixing with laughter as I realized what I was saying.

Kane started laughing with me.

“They spanked him, then they made him shove my wedding band up his ass.”

I wiped my face, and Kane forced himself to stop laughing. We really weren’t sure if it was funny or disturbed, but laughing felt good. He closed the video and put my phone back in my purse.

“Whoever those guys are, I’m glad they gave you the wake up call you needed. That asshole of an ex-husband had no business being with a beautiful, amazing woman like you. Come on. Let’s go down to the water.”

He jumped down from the lifeguard post and landed in the sand. He put his arms out for me and, after hesitating just a second, I leapt right into them.