Chapter Twenty-Three

Reagan

 

“Anything else?” Luke asked.

I surveyed the coffee table, packed with snacks and books, then the couch crammed with pillows, and shook my head. “Think I’m good.”

“I shouldn’t be gone long,” he said, though he made no move to leave.

“I’ll be fine,” I said. “I got downstairs this morning on my own.”

Luke scowled, albeit in an adorable way. “Don’t remind me. What if you’d fallen?”

“Worry-wart,” I teased.

“I know the dogs are here and everything, but…” Luke sighed and looked around. “I don’t know—I don’t like leaving you alone up here.”

“The vryke hasn’t been seen in days, I’m feeling better, and it’s been quiet,” I pointed out.

Luke nodded and went to step towards the couch, then seemed to second-guess himself. But his eyes lingered on my face, and a tingle went up my spine. The blue of his eyes deepened.

“No wild house parties,” he said in a light tone, although the air in the room had changed.

“No promises,” I said and wrapped myself around a pillow. But it didn’t satisfy the ache.

The ache for there to be no distance between us.

Or clothes, for that matter.

I caught that thought and looked down, chiding myself. But when I glanced back up, Luke had a slight smirk on his face, and I gripped the pillow more tightly.

Letting Luke worry and fuss over me for the last few days had been wonderful. He took it so seriously, tiptoeing around, arguing with Rogda, checking in on me and asking questions, showing up with snacks or books.

But it had also wreaked hell on my nervous system. One look or accidental touch would set those nerve endings dancing like lightning in a hurricane. With each passing day, the energy between us smoldered and rose, until it was teasing the edges of an explosive level I wasn’t sure I could handle.

Also, I didn’t know if it was all in my head. Maybe I just thought it was explosive because I wasn’t used to this Luke, or to having him all to myself. Or because I hadn’t been with a man in forever.

Hadn’t the same thing happened while on that trip to Belrush?

It was hard not to try and milk it, to prostrate myself on the couch like a Southern belle and beg Luke not to go. I’d forced myself not to call for him this morning and take the stairs on my own. Though I still got winded far too easily, I was recovering swiftly and on schedule.

However, I had been taking advantage of sleeping in Luke’s room. He hadn’t made me move or said anything to the contrary. More than once, too, I’d woken up and caught him napping on the couch in the room. I’d told him he could take my bed, but he’d waved me off.

I’d also wanted to suggest we share the bed, but falling asleep on him once had been enough.

“I’ll be back soon,” he said, and I got my head out of the bedroom.

“Do you have to go?” I asked before I could stop myself, my voice low and wistful.

Luke gave me a heart-rending look, his face falling into lines of concern. “Of course not.” He crossed the room and tipped my chin up. “What do you need?”

My stomach somersaulted with butterflies, all my attention sharpening at the touch of rough fingers on my chin, and the man towering over me. I think the rest of the house vanished.

“Rea?” Luke leaned down, and I pulled back, unable to keep up eye contact.

He won.

A chuckle brushed past my ear, and Luke’s low voice whispered, “What’d I tell you about flirtin' with fire?" He ruffled my hair and left the house, laughing.

I didn't move for several minutes. Then I clapped my hands over my burning face and let out a hysterical kind of laugh. More than anything, I needed to get back on my feet so I could keep up with Luke. How, I didn’t know, but right now he had the upper hand.

Every day so far, I’d had visitors. I’d thought my mom might come up today. She’d been here every day, giving me sly looks as I tried in vain not to pay attention to where Luke was in the room. But there’d been something going on with Cassidy, and I had a feeling she was dealing with that. My dad was fighting a cold, so he’d been bedridden. Luke had offered to bring me down there to see him, but Rogda had warned me that my immune system was recovering, too.

“You might be feeling better, but your body is still catching up,” she said. “You had a recoil reaction like Luke did.” Then she’d tsked about suppressing my abilities, going around and muttering things in Russian under her breath.

Picking up a book, I tried to read, but my eyes were heavy, and I dozed off.

 

Next thing I knew, I woke up, startled, and saw a mess of dirty blond hair inches from my hand. Without thinking, I let my fingers trace through it, still half in a dream.

A deep sigh emanated and made my toes curl. “You have secret hairdresser aspirations?”

“No,” I said and watched as Luke tipped his head back, looking at me. He was sitting on the floor, with his knees up and the coffee table pushed away. One arm dangled off of it, a beer held in his loose fingers. But his breath didn’t smell like alcohol. “You just looking at that beer?”

“This was my dad’s favorite,” he said. “Not that he was a big drinker, but when he drank, it was always this stuff.” He flipped it around so I could see the Sam Adams Boston Lager logo. “I don’t even think he’d ever been to New England. I never asked.”

I woke up more and adjusted my head so I could see him better. This close, I could see the fading blue of the bruise around his eye, a wake-up call from Tristan, he’d called it.

My fingertips found his shoulder as I tried to find the right words. Beyond Virginia, Luke had never brought up his family or past. The grief in his voice was so raw, it made my throat ache.

“What happened?” I asked.

Luke rubbed his forehead. “We got a communication from the SB.”

“The Stasis Bureau?” I asked, and my fingers curled into his shirt. “How?”

“Left it for us on the border. Shifter patrol saw some Skrors fleeing the area and then found a canister. Checked it over and found it inside.”

“What if it had been some kind of bomb?” I asked.

Luke gave me a lazy grin. “Rea, they know what they’re doing.”

“Okay, what do they want? And wait, should you be giving them the time of day?”

“That was the Deacon boys’ and Tristan’s stance. Ignore it. But Xander is considering it.” When Luke didn’t say anything else, I poked his cheek, and he grabbed my hand. “Sorry. I got lost in thought. They want a meeting.” His voice was dull. “To lay down some terms. Basically, they’re promising to leave us alone in exchange for something.”

“And you don’t know what that is?”

“No.”

“Is there more?” I asked.

“Yeah, it requested me and Xander by name,” Luke said. “Xander can’t go, even though he’s not happy about that…” He trailed off, and his fingers tightened on mine, his eyes closing. “The person, though, or one of the people who will be there, is Shauna Lind.”

Every muscle in my body tensed.

Finally, a name. This was the woman haunting Luke.

“She’s my ex,” Luke said quietly, and I almost pulled away, but his grip tightened. “We were even engaged—briefly. But Lind, she doesn’t have much of an attention span.” Now his voice grew colder and bitter. “Unless it’s status and power related. She’s ruthless about getting what she wants, and she doesn’t care what it takes. She’s a hell of a manipulator and liar.”

My stomach clenched. “I’m so sorry. We all have shitty exes, though.”

His chin dipped to his chest. “There’s nothing in her, Reagan, but I wanted there to be. And she took advantage of that. I trusted her, and—”

“You shouldn’t go.” My voice sounded strange to my own ears. “Please.”

“Xander is thinking about it, but Kal and Rett are probably the better bet. Alpha bear shifters, you know—it’s hard to take them down, and no one has a nose for trouble like Kal.”

“Not even you?” I teased, even as relief went through me.

"No." Luke let out a rueful laugh, and his eyes opened, looking at me. "I like to think I have good judgment, but honestly, I have to think about things ten ways to Sunday. And even then, I screw up half the time. Anyway." He turned his body so that he was facing me, his arm resting on my thigh, and his fingers intertwining with mine. "Thank you for listening.”

“Of course,” I said and let out a long breath. “We lost my grandfather before we set out for Winfyre. Actually, we’re not sure what happened, but I’m pretty sure he’s gone.” My throat thickened, and I suddenly wondered why the hell I was bringing this up. “I only wanted to say, I understand, and I know what it’s like to blame yourself for making mistakes after the Rift.”

“I should blame myself,” Luke said in an intense voice. “It’s my fault Pop died.”

“Luke—”

“No, Reagan, you don’t…” Anger flared and died. He put a hand to his face. “It’s not what you think.”

“You can tell me,” I said. “You’re a good man, and you loved him—that’s what matters.”

His hand slipped, and his head bowed. “Not enough to protect him from my own stupidity.”

There was silence, and I slowly said, "My grandfather taught me everything there is to know about the woods. Camping and wilderness skills, you name it. When I was younger, we'd all go camping all the time, but as we got older, fewer and fewer people came. Until it was the two of us. He was so spry for an old guy, you know?" I wiped at my face. "I think you would have liked him."

“If he’s anything like you, then yeah,” Luke said.

“After the Rift,” I said slowly, “he became a shifter." Luke looked up at that, and I nodded. "An owl. It was incredible. He loved it, but…I mean, everything went to hell after that. Cassidy insisted on going back to Seattle, even though we were hearing scary things. Grandpa and I went with her, just when it was getting bad there. Then we couldn't get a hold of Linh's mom or Shelby's parents.

"He-he said he'd go check on them. Cassidy and I didn't want to leave him, but he wouldn't budge. He said he could fly out, worst case. We believed him." My throat closed up. "We waited five days. We would've waited longer, but the SB was coming, and we—"

My voice broke, and my eyes closed.

“He would’ve wanted you to go,” Luke said in the gentlest voice as his thumb rubbed mine. I nodded. "I'm so sorry, though. Do you want us to look into it?"

"Maybe," I said and rubbed my eyes. "My parents have been talking about it. I think Shelby and Linh asked to have their parents investigated." I blew out a sigh. "I'm sure there are so many."

“Yeah,” Luke said quietly.

We stayed like that for a while, not talking, and trying to come to grips with our shared grief. Luke had closed his eyes, looking exhausted and resting his head on our joined hands. I was thinking about everything he’d said and bit my lip.

“Maybe this really is an olive branch,” I suggested. “Maybe they’re tired of the chaos, too.”

Luke shook his head. “I doubt it.”

“I mean, why else would she come? Maybe she wants to apologize—”

A bitter and rough laugh escaped Luke. “Reagan, no. She wants to win. She wants to cull herself five Alphas and rise up in the ranks of wherever she is. Zero conscience.”

“Sorry,” I said in a small voice. “I was trying to find the silver lining.”

“I know,” he said, and he opened his eyes, trying to smile. “I appreciate it.”

I’d hoped he would tell me what had happened between Lind and him, why he didn’t trust her, and what had happened to his father, but maybe he wasn’t ready to talk. I sensed there was a deeper wound here, one I’d barely gotten a glimpse of. But still, unreasonable jealousy rose up, and I wondered what Lind looked like.

“You wouldn’t let them into Winfyre, would you?” I asked.

“Hell, no,” Luke burst out. “They’d love that.”

“Good,” I said.

“God only knows what they’d do,” he said. “Burn the place to the ground, probably.”

“What do you think happens—” I swallowed the question.

Luke gave me an understanding look and murmured, “There are underground groups who work to get them out.” My eyes went wide, and he nodded. “They work out of Veda. More resources up there, you know.”

“Why don’t you guys live up there?” I asked.

“We need to stay near Xander, and he needs to be here.” Luke glanced at the window and nodded north. “You asked me why the other side of the bay wasn’t settled. Well, it’s because of him.”

I’d wondered about Xander’s mysterious power and his animal form, but I’d never pried. For some reason, as with all Winfyre denizens, there was an unspoken respect for the secret.

“Speaking of which, I need you to stay away from the borders,” Luke said. “Lind would love to get her claws into you." His jaw went tight. "Sarrow probably told her, if the SB and Skrors have formed an alliance.”

“Why are you so sure they’re working together?” I asked.

“When did I say that?” Luke asked.

“You mentioned it once, something like, ‘she told him.’ Wasn’t hard to put it together.”

“Because it makes a sick kind of sense,” Luke said, “once I realized what she was and the lengths she was willing to go to for power.” I gazed at him, and he sighed. “I know you think you want to know, Reagan, but believe me, you don’t.”

“I do, though. Mainly because I think it would help you to talk about it,” I said, sitting up.

Luke set the beer on the table and gently tugged his hand away from mine. I watched as he stood up and berated myself for going too far. But then he walked over to the fireplace and began stacking wood, then tossed in a match. It went up in a second.

I’d sat up and watched as he walked back over, all light swallowed into shadow in his eyes. He sat down next to me and leaned back, his gaze still lost in things I couldn’t see. Pain lined his face, and his shoulders hunched.

“Maybe three months after the Rift happened, Rett, Tristan, and I left Winfyre,” Luke said, and I tried to even out my breathing. He was telling me, and I wasn't sure how I felt about it. I had a sense I was about to learn a heartbreaking secret. “We wanted to get our families up here. Tristan was a California guy, and the Deacons are from Oregon. We split up in Seattle.” He paused. “Lind was there. I hadn’t seen her in over a year. We’d broken up years before that, but I still felt like I should go check on her. She was my friend.” He swallowed. “Maybe, I thought, this changed things…”

Uneasiness came over me. “Did it?”

“No. Here I was, so relieved Lind was in Seattle. I thought I’d swoop in and save the day. Then she was so happy to see me, hugging me and everything. I was tired and overwhelmed, and the city was different, as you know. Lockdowns and checkpoints. I wasn’t thinking.”

Luke was silent for several moments, then said, in a low voice of aching bitterness, “I told her too much. I gave her everything she needed.”

“What do you mean?” I asked, leaning forward and touching his arm gently.

“I didn’t even think to make sure I could trust her. Ask who she was working for.”

“She was working for the SB?” I asked, and Luke nodded. “And she didn’t tell you?”

“Yes,” Luke said.

I swallowed the many, many epithets I wanted to hurl. “Did you tell her you were a shifter? And about Winfyre?”

“That I was a shifter, yes, but Winfyre, no. Only inasmuch as we had a safe haven in British Columbia,” Luke answered and gripped his hands together. “I told her to think about coming with us because she was on the fence about it. Promised I’d be back in two weeks.”

Luke’s entire body seemed to radiate with agony.

“I had to go get Pop.” His voice was soft. “Lind was surprised. Mentioned how she’d thought he still lived in Virginia. I remember being flattered by that. Told her about his move to Coos Bay, how much he liked it there, and how the old bastard didn’t want to leave, even if it was safer…”

My heart was racing with anticipation, but my mind hadn’t caught up yet.

“I got there, and—” Luke put his face in his hands, and his voice broke. “I realized what I’d done. I’d put my trust in the wrong person, and this was the cost.”

Something heavy and dark slammed into me. “No. Oh, Luke.”

“The SB got there first.” Now his voice was hollow. “I was walking down his little beach, enjoying the sunrise and the waves. Then, it was like all light was crushed out of the sky. Something was wrong, and I ran.” Luke’s breath grew ragged. “And I found him, lying in the sand…”

My breath hitched, and I pressed my hands into the cushions as Luke struggled.

Oh, Luke, no…

“Just like me. An Alpha wolf, silver and black, shot through the head.”