I had no clue what time it was. All I knew was that it was sometime at night because it was pitch black outside. I sat up on the bed, and my head instantly started to spin.

Having never been drunk before, I’d never experienced a hangover. If that was what you had to look forward to when you drank, I wasn’t sure why anyone touched a sip of alcohol in the first place.

It took me a minute to get my bearings, but I was able to look around and realize that I was still in Nick’s apartment. My head was pounding so I laid back down on the pillow and wondered what I had been thinking. I kept trying to talk myself out of going over there.

I kept telling myself that nothing good could possibly come from going to his place. I didn’t let those little voices in my head win, however, because I felt like I owed it to him to thank him for being there for me when I needed him the most.

Showing my gratitude was never supposed to end with me in his bed, but there I was. My inhibitions were gone as soon as the whiskey went down my throat and I allowed passion and desire to take over.

Nick was sleeping peacefully next to me, his arm around my waist, just like we always slept. I slid my body to the side, grabbing his hand and moving it away from me.

He moved around and said something indecipherable in his sleep, pulling his arm close to himself as he readjusted his body. It was dark, but I was able to see him using the dim light coming from the bathroom. I couldn’t help but look at his face. He was so handsome.

I thought about how well I knew him but at the same time, didn’t really know him at all. When it came to the physical aspects of our relationship, I knew him well. I knew every single detail of his body.

I knew what turned him on, as well as the things he didn’t like. I knew what made him laugh, and I knew what made him upset. What worried me, however, were the things that I had no clue about.

When it came to his past, I had no idea what was true and what was made up. I had no clue who he was when he was younger or anything about his life before I met him.

All I knew was that he had been to prison after a bar fight got out of hand. I didn’t know what prison had been like or what kind of an effect it had on him.

Lying there looking at him was so strange. He seemed so peaceful. Everything seemed so calm. It made me wonder how things progressed the way they did. How did we end up in such a bad spot?

I never would have put up with any of that from any other man, but with him, it was so different. Could it be because I had never been in love with any man like I loved Nick? Could it be because I had never felt the kind of love that he had given to me? Was it really love, though? Was it real?

It sure felt real. When we were together, he’d been so good to me. He was sweet and loving. Honestly, when the truth came out about him being in prison, he was pissed off, but he wasn’t mad at me. He never told me that I should mind my own business or anything like that.

He was persistent when it came to getting me back. He let me know that he was there and that he still loved me. He never yelled at me or hit me when I denied his advances. Instead, he just kept making sure I knew he was around.

A few people that I told about it said that I should have been scared of him. They told me that I should have been concerned at his persistence, but I wasn’t worried in any way. I wasn’t in fear at any time. I knew that he wouldn’t ever hurt me.

Of course, maybe I was just being stupid. I could have made him stop coming around if I really wanted to. The truth was, somewhere deep down inside of me, I didn’t want him to stop.

As I pondered all of these feelings, I looked down and watched him sleeping. It always amazed me how such a big, tough guy could look so angelic when he slept. All of his features when softened while he was out.

The lines that I usually saw on his forehead weren’t visible. I took my finger and traced it lightly from his cheek down to his chest. His muscles were thick and hard, even as he slept.

“Hey gorgeous,” Nick mumbled out of his sleep, his voice sounding throaty and scratchy. “How are you feeling?” he asked me, placing his hand on my arm.

I don’t know if it was the alcohol that was still in my system or something else, but it felt like the walls were going to close in on me. I scooted away from him as fast as I could and jumped out of bed. As soon as my feet hit the floor, I regretted my decision. My head was pounding, and I felt dizzy.

“Alexa? Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, I'm okay. I’ve just got a little bit of a headache. Should have known better than to drink like that. I won’t be making that mistake again,” I told him as I bent down to put on my jeans. “I think I’m just going to head home.”

“What? You’re leaving? Why?” Nick asked as he stood up from the bed. “You can’t drive home. You’ve had way too much to drink.”

“It’s fine. I’m not drunk anymore. I just really have to go. I only meant to stop by for a few minutes. I shouldn’t be here.