Two Years Ago

You know that moment when a hot girl sweeps her eyes up your body, each of your muscles instinctively flexing as she focuses on the sections of your brawny strength. That heat in her eyes, and you just know that she’s wondering what you’ll be like in bed. If you’ll be able to hold her down, pin her up against a wall?

Yeah, I know what that looks like too. Because I see every girl at Grover University give that look to my teammates every night we go out. But never me.

Hi, I’m Clint Bellows, and I’m the fat friend.

Sure, every group has one. But what no one tells you is that if you are the fat friend, life fucking sucks. Good thing I’m also used to it.

I’ve been the big guy, the teddy bear, for as long as I can remember. I’d never been a small kid — always a couple pounds too heavy, a little bit too large for each grade I entered.

I’d resigned myself to being passed over, to having to suck in my stomach each time an attractive girl looked my way, hoping she’d overlook the extra weight and come up and talk to me. I’d heard the whispers from the girls who came back to the house with my friends, “I just wish their roommate was hotter so that one of us could hook up with him.”

I’d endured the stares and criticism of other college coaches when I’d gone to try out for their baseball teams while I was in high school. One coach had actually told me I would never play for him unless I got rid of the gut.

So I hid. I used my weight, my shame, to hide from the world. Insecurities ruled my life, usually keeping me from going to parties, doing normal things a 21-year-old would do. Especially things guys do with girls.

It’s never been the hugest deal, just the ugly dark cloud hanging out in the background, tainting the picture but never fully ruining it. Until tonight.

Tonight. When Owen Axel, my best friend, brought his girlfriend Minka Braxton to visit, she’d brought her two friends. And one of them just happens to be the girl of my dreams.

Or so I think she is, not that I’ve gotten the nerve to go up and talk to her.

But when Kelsey O’Brien walked onto my porch this afternoon, it had taken all of my willpower not to drool like a hungry dog. She was fucking perfect. Small and full of life, like a beautiful fairy. Like the one Liv Tyler played in Lord of the Rings. Except smaller, which made her so much hotter. Something about knowing I could tower over her if we were toe-to-toe makes my cock twitch with lustful anticipation.

She’s got that halo of fiery red hair twirling around her foxlike features. Her pointy ears, narrow nose and slanting, mysterious amber eyes. Her expression was cunning, like she had some devilish idea on her mind. Jesus, she made me gulp so hard I thought my Adam’s apple would end up in my stomach.

But of course, Kelsey had looked straight through me.

I’d seen her eyes slide right over me to Parker, his muscled, tatted torso on full display. Damnit, I’d thought. I thought I would get over it, just move on from yet another rejection or pass over. But this one niggled at me all day. I couldn’t get her out of my head. That megawatt, troublesome grin she’d plastered on her face as we said hello wouldn’t stop playing over and over in my brain.

For the first time in my life, I wished I looked different. Of course I’d had that thought before…if I could just be more in shape, if I just had muscles, if I had more confidence. But this time I felt it down to my bones. A pit of deep sadness sat in my stomach, because if I could just look like Parker or some other cooler looking dude, she would have noticed me.

I would have been the one she was dancing with right now, out on the deck at her first college party. She might even come back to my bed, let me kiss her and strip off those clothes, which were already leaving little to the imagination. My cock went rigid in my boxers.

This is how it had always been. Clint, the invisible big guy. Friendly, pretty cool, but not hot enough to actually date. Or fuck. Or anything.

Shame, hurt and dejection crawled up my throat until the point of nausea. I didn’t even realize Owen’s girlfriend had come out to stand beside me.

“Hey, Owen’s girl.” I grin, but she scowls at me. Shit, I think I just offended her. “Sorry, I know, your name is Minka. Anyways…is your friend, the pretty, short one, single?”

She eyes me and I see it instantly. She’s assessing whether Kelsey would ever date me, and by the sympathetic look in her eyes, I’m guessing it was a no.

“Kelsey, yeah she is. But that’s of her own doing. Word of advice? Don’t try it. She doesn’t do boyfriends. Or friends that are boys for that matter.”

Okay. Okay…I could work with that. I’d get her to be my friend first. I would be the first guy to do that. Minka walks away with a concern marring her face.

A plan began to formulate in my head. This time would be different. I could change, sure it would be hard and it would take a while. But eventually I’d mold my muscles and shape my body into a masterpiece that Kelsey could not ignore.

At the same time, I would befriend her. I’d become her go-to guy, the one she could count on. I’d make her laugh, get to see her smile. This way she would know me well before I really went after her.

Because I intended to catch her. To make my face be the one she saw when she closed her eyes. To make her think about me as much as I was already thinking about her, and I’d only just laid eyes on her four hours ago.

This time I would get the girl. Because she wasn’t just any girl, this was the girl that would change my life. I felt in my bones.

I’d had everyone, especially women, pass me over for too long. I took it lying down. Not anymore. It was time to stand up, buff up, and show Kelsey O’Brien exactly why I was the only man for her.