I wake up in darkness. I can feel something across my lips, and my hands and feet are bound. I struggle to sit up and hit my head. Laying back down I feel the hum of an engine and realise I’m in a car boot. Fucking Rance. This is not good. Rance will be taking me to Randall and he’s going to be mad. Randall is going to hurt me in a way that I might not come back from. Tears well in my eyes and run down my cheeks as my mind imagines the worst of things to come. Groping around in the darkness, I find nothing. There’s nothing in here to help me, I’m defenceless. I’m useless. Panic rises within me and I scream, the sound is muffled and no one can possibly hear me. Death must surely be rubbing his hands together waiting for me. This image causes me to laugh, of course Death is Randall and I thought I could out-run him. Stupid.

The boot opens, it’s dark outside. Rance reaches in and grabs my hair, forcing me to sit up. Pain shoots through me from the roots of my hair to my feet. Whatever he did to me, I’m sore.

“Hey, Cindy, Randall is on his way. Did you really think you could leave him and we wouldn’t find you?” Rance snarls at me.

From experience, I know better than to answer, not that I can with a gag on. Rance is one of those coppers who thinks he’s better than everyone. Being from a small town suits him fine, it makes him top dog in a very small place, just the way he likes it.

I look around and realise we are at a rest stop. Rance has parked in a corner away from the other vehicles. It occurs to me that if I could scream I might survive this. As if he knows what I’m thinking he pulls me out of the boot by my hair and I land on the ground, hard. More tears fall down my face, this time from the pain in my hip. Rance grabs my shirt to pull me up, ripping it and exposing my bra clad breasts.

Rance’s eyes lock onto my cleavage. “You know, I was always envious of Randall and you. I was amazed you let him do whatever he wanted. You know he bragged about it, don’t you?” His hands get closer and he roughly massages my breasts. Bile rises up in my throat as he continues his assault. “He only needs you for a few more days, when he has your money he’ll be done with you.” Rance puts a hand between my legs and rubs. I shake my head furiously and yell. He laughs. “Time for some fun.”

Twisting and thrashing I try to pull myself out of his grip all the while my head is shaking no. Rance grabs my elbow and pulls me toward the back of the car. He opens the door and pushes me into it. My head hits the door frame and I am momentarily stunned When Rance begins to undo my jeans, I slap at his hands with my bound ones. Randall was bad enough, I’m not sure I can survive mentally knowing Rance had defiled me. I try to turn away from him, screaming as loud as I can but it’s all for nothing, I’m gagged and bound, no one is coming for me.

“Oh for fuck’s sake!” he growls and stops. Rance gets off me and I try to get my pulse to slow and to think about where I am and what I have to do to survive. If I can make this as hard as possible on him, he won’t do it; after all I am his brother’s wife. Stupidly, I think he’s given up on raping me.

Rance returns, he straddles me in the back seat, grabs my hands and puts them above my head. I struggle and he hits me in the face, rendering me near unconscious. As if in a daze, I feel him tape my hands to the door handle. He’s smiling, pleased with himself. Once my hands are secured he goes back to removing my jeans and underwear, cutting through the bonds at my feet with a hunting knife. The knife I’ve seen him and Randall use to gut animals that they’ve killed. I close my eyes tight and lock my legs together. I am not some dumb animal that they can dispose of. I will not make this easy on him. Tears course down my face, I’m shaking my head, I’m screaming, but none of this seems to be penetrating his ugly thick skull. All the while I keep my eyes closed.

“Come on, Cindy, Randall told me how you get off on all this stuff. My fucking old lady only lets me at her on special occasions. He was always saying you were up for anything.”

I feel his hands on my knees as he forces them apart and pushes my legs up. Louder, I’m screaming against my gag, shaking all over when I feel him as he enters me. The pain, the humiliation all comes flooding back at this new, unwanted assault. Reverting back to my old self, I freeze. I allow this pig to pump in and out of me, feeling pain with every thrust. Rance finishes by collapsing on top of me and sucking on my nipple through the fabric of my bra. He’s still inside of me as he sucks and strokes me.

“Damn, I should have done that a long time ago. You’re tight and young. Better than the old bitch I’m married to. Maybe I’ll keep you after all this is done.”

I feel Rance awkwardly move off me and stand outside the car doing up his jeans, I close my legs and pull them up into a foetal position. My eyes are still closed as I mentally assess the damage to my body. I think that some of my ribs are either broken or badly bruised, my hip is painful and my jaw is aching but doesn’t feel broken. But I am broken. I’m scared, I’m hurt inside and out. The fear of what Randall will do, or worse, that Rance will keep me and I’ll never have a life, I’ll never be free.

The next sensation I feel is Rance straddling me again and my eyes fly open hoping it isn’t another assault. He has the knife in his hands this time and all I can think is that I hope he’s going to end my suffering. A life with him would be worse than hell itself. Rance presses it against my cheek, under my eye, and smiles leeringly at me.

“Not going to kill you, Cindy...might slice you up a bit though.”

I stare at him, challenging him silently to end my life here and now. Whatever he sees in my eyes causes the smile on his face to disappear. I hate him and his brother. If I ever get free I’ll use that fucking knife on them both. Rance puts the knife to my hands and slices through the tape as he climbs off me.

“Get out of the car.” His tone is flat, and he doesn’t look at me.

I sit up and slide painfully across the seat to get out. Rance hands me my jeans and underwear. I see no point in putting the underwear on so I use them to wipe myself and cringe at the rawness. I throw them on the ground once I’m done. Every movement causes me pain and trying to breathe through the tape over my mouth is hard. I reach up and tenderly try to remove it. Rance eyes me and I stop.

“You scream, you make any fucking sound and I’ll end you. Understand?”

I nod, Rance stands next to me, his hand trails up from my shoulder to my mouth and he rips the tape off, taking skin with it. I gasp but don’t scream. Rance grins, happy that he’s caused me more hurt. Stiffly, I put my jeans back on. My body feels worse than it has in a long time. And now I have this new assault to process, one which my mind can’t even think about at the moment.

“Get back in the car,” he orders.

I nod and sit back down, like the good little robot I am. That Cindy is. Rance shuts the door and moves away, phone to his ear. I can’t hear what he’s saying. Thinking about an escape plan seems futile. I’m right back where I started. I had a fleeting moment of freedom, of love...was it love?

Whatever it was, it wasn’t this.

“Malakai”, I whisper his name and tears flow down my face, these turn into silent sobs as I know my captor will hurt me if I’m too loud. Curling up into a ball, my mind latches onto the only man who’s ever showed me kindness and I whisper his name over and over again in a silent prayer meant only for him.