Nineteen

Ava

What the fuck is this man doing to me?

My call to him was initially an act. It was mostly to get him to meet up with me again so I could pump him for information. I knew Ian was at ease talking to me, and I hoped I could get him talking enough that he would reveal something that would help me build a case against him. But as I waited along the pier, staring over the briskly chilled Lake Michigan, I fought to convince myself that this meeting was strictly work related. I needed to be honest. If with nobody else, then with myself–I was truly falling for him.

I was being torn in two, pulled in opposite directions. I was caught between my job and the truth, and a man I’d just started to get to know but felt insanely deeply for. Originally, when I’d set my eyes on him, I wasn’t sure how anyone could fall for a vicious man like him, knowing what I did. Knowing the things he’d done. But now that I’d spent time with him and had gotten to know him on a personal level? Well, it was hard to remember exactly who I was dealing with sometimes. And my feelings were very real.

Too real.

If I thought about it, I could honestly see myself settling down with this man at some point down the line. But I knew this entire charade was a fraud. I wasn’t some administrative assistant like I’d told him, and Ian wasn’t, well–Ian.

“I’m sorry for everything, Ava,” he said, holding my hands in his. “I’m sorry for making you cry, for making you think I was running away from you. I’m just worried and a little scared if you want me to be honest. This is all new to me, and my life is a shit storm most days.”

“I understand,” I said. I knew all too well what he meant.

“I’ve never considered a woman with more than my dick. How I made her feel, if I made her happy. But believe me, sweetheart,” he said as he pulled me closer, holding me in his arms now. “No matter what, my feelings for you are very real, I just don’t understand it all.”

His eyes were soft and filled with nothing but adoration and love. And when he looked at me, he reminded me of a sweet, innocent child. There was no guile, no deception–nothing bad in those eyes that I could see. They were clear as day, but that look never lasted too long. The darkness always overtook them at some point, just as it took him over, too.

“My feelings for you are…” I hesitated, unsure if I wanted to admit the truth out loud just yet. He tilted his head and eyed me quizzically, waiting for the words to fall from my lips. “True, deep, real. Completely unexpected, Ian.” And I meant it. No matter what happened, I knew deep down how I felt for this man–or at least the man I thought I knew, even if I didn’t want to be honest with myself.

He kissed the tip of my nose. “I know you have to get back to work, my sweet Ava. So do I, sadly enough. Even though I’d like nothing more than to spend the entire day out here with you.”

I leaned my body against his and stood on my tiptoes and pressed my lips to him. I conveyed every pent-up emotion I was too scared to express into that kiss. I wanted him to know. To feel it. Because I knew that this very well could be the last kiss we ever shared.

All this time, he’d thought my tears were for thinking he’d run away from me. That was only partially it. I was crying because as soon as I got back to the police station, I would have to talk to Chief Wheeler and turn him in.

I’d have to face the truth. The man I was in love with wasn’t Ian, an executive who ran his family’s import business. The man in front me was someone much darker. Someone infamous for his brutality. The man in front of me was given to fits of rage. And his name was Flynn O’Brien.

The leader of the Irish Mob.

And the son of the man who killed my father.

***

I walked toward my car, my head down and my heart dragging on the ground behind me. I had no intention of looking back. I couldn’t. I refused to let myself, but I knew that if I dared look at him, I might change my mind and talk myself out of it.

But I had to do this. I had to go through with it. I had to turn over everything I knew about Flynn O’Brien and the new leadership of the Irish Mob over to Chief Wheeler. They didn’t know how I’d found most of this out–that I’d gone in undercover. No one would have allowed me to do that.

I’d made the decision for myself and had done it on my own, mainly because he’d made it extremely easy for me to get close to him once he’d started flirting with me at the bar. But this, well, this was beyond anything I had imagined for us. Falling in love with an O’Brien—the man I was building a case against so he could face justice in the state penitentiary–now that was a first.

Especially since our families were sworn enemies.

I clicked the lock on my key fob and heard the doors of my car unlock. But as I reached to open the door, I felt something pressed against the center of my back. He stood behind me–too close for comfort actually, and nearly pressed me into the car.

“Who are you?” the voice tinged with a heavy Russian accent asked me.

“My name is Ava, what do you want?”

“What were you doing with Flynn?”

“Who?”

I felt the weapon press harder on my back. I’d been around guns long enough to know what they felt like without having to have eyes on it.

I closed my eyes and said a prayer to whoever was listening, asking that someone might see us and come to my rescue. I was trapped between this man–a very large man–and my car. The gun between our bodies.

“You fucking know who I’m talking about, bitch,” he said.

“No, I don’t–”

His free hand wrapped around my face. Something pressed up against my mouth, and before I knew what hit me, my entire world went black.