How You Know It Won’t Work:
He uses a Pokémon Go pickup line on you
My sleepover with Nathan had done wonders to my confidence. I was feeling myself Beyoncé style. My hair had bounce, my eyes shone brighter, and I had a new pep in my step.
Maybe that was why I found myself sitting in a patchwork booth with Iris and a few of my other coworkers. Just because my behavior improved didn’t mean my attendance tonight was going to get me to join the masses to White-Girl-Wasted-ville.
We all had drinks in front of us, although mine was left untouched. Iris insisted on ordering some pink fruity concoction I was supposed to love, but the smell alone had my nose scrunching in disgust. Iris hated wasted alcohol, so I assumed the longer I left the glass sitting undisturbed, the more she’ll want to drink the concoction before it became watered down.
It was going on ten o’clock, and the bar was only getting louder. I was not a fan of the weird techno music blasting from the speakers in the corner of the room, but thankfully the noise of the crowd surrounding the pool tables drowned some of it out.
There was nothing about this outing that was particularly fun, but I painted a smile on regardless, because I knew I’d be hassled if I didn’t. Iris had noticed my downtrodden mood at work but didn’t push when I avoided her.
Sneaking a glance at my phone under the table, I re-read my unanswered text. For probably the one millionth time.
Me: Hey, Nate. How was your week?
It was delivered three days ago without a response yet. In fact, it’d been radio silence between us since the moment he left my apartment. I told myself that he could have broken his phone. Maybe the screen cracked. Or maybe he was just busy. He was always busy.
We should plan that hiking trip, he’d told me. But would we? He’d been telling me that for over a month.
Making an excuse to go to the bathroom, I slipped out of the booth and down the corridor to escape for a moment. At this point, I was counting down the seconds until I could crawl home. I figured another twenty minutes or so, and Iris would be too plastered to notice I’d left.
After ten minutes of sitting on the toilet browsing Facebook, I decided I’d been gone long enough. I got up, washed my hands, and forced my feet to take the path back to the table. Halfway there, a guy who resembled Justin Timberlake circa 1998 stumbled into me. Alcohol was seeping from his pores and causing my eyes to water.
“Hey,” he greeted, leaning his forearm against the wall beside us. I think he winked at me, but his movements were slow and awkward.
“Hi,” I drew out, eyeing the anime shirt he wore. It looked like something a middle schooler would own and be proud about.
“You know,” he slurred, “I caught all 150 Pokémon in Pokémon Go.” He stumbled slightly. Trying a different tactic, he said, “Did you see this weekend’s forecast? Cloudy with a chance of Squirtle?”
Why did those words not surprise me? I honestly was waiting for a bad rendition of “It’s Gonna Be Me”.
I couldn’t stop the snort from escaping. This dude had to be thirty. Why did he act like catching virtual creatures in a make-believe world geared toward bored teenagers was his biggest accomplishment?
Clearing my throat, I nodded in fake appraisal, eyes wide, head bobbing theatrically. “Yeah? That’s, um, interesting?”
He grinned. “Yep. So…want to get a drink with me? Maybe go back to my place and play a game or two?”
Cringing, I couldn’t help but conjure a mental image of his home. A dark, musty bedroom in the basement of his parents’ house, blow up dolls wearing cartoon T-shirts, posters of half-naked women hanging on the walls, and Star Wars fan fiction littering the floor.
I also wasn’t sure what kind of games he had in mind. Was he implying sexual ones? Or more along the lines of running around town catching virtual cartoons?
Either way, his plans weren’t in my future.
I jabbed my thumb toward the main room. “You know, I would, but I’ve actually got friends waiting for me. Good luck finding somebody interested in your skills.”
His features twisted into offense, clearly not drunk enough to miss my thick sarcasm. “I happen to know plenty of women find my skills sexy!”
Somehow, I doubted that.
Walking away from his swaying form before he made a bigger fool of himself, I took stock to the extra bodies surrounding our table. From the broad, toned, muscled views of their backs, they were all men, which meant Iris was going to try and work her matchmaking magic. Thankfully, I was tapping out for the night.
One of the three men occupying our table grabbed my attention instantly. I’d recognized those dirty-blond locks anywhere, and when he laughed, I stopped and stared in the middle of the floor. A girl bumped into me and spilled her drink in a puddle at our feet.
Shit.
Iris noticed my pointed glare directed at Caleb’s back, and gave me a pleading look. I knew she was trying to look apologetic, but she was probably secretly screaming in victory.
Caleb followed his sister’s attention and turned to lock eyes with me. My lips parted to say something, but his locked jaw and fiery eyes shut me up.
“What the hell happened?” he demanded, bolting up so fast that the chair fell backwards. He met me half way, gently turning my face to study my bruised cheek in better lighting.
I smacked his hands away. “Nothing.”
His expression screamed disbelief. “If somebody hurt you—”
“Stop,” I hissed, noting the audience we were gathering. “I told you it was nothing.”
“You have a black eye.”
“Gee, thanks for pointing it out, I had nooo idea,” I intoned, rolling my eyes.
“Paisley—”
“Caleb,” I warned. “I’m not talking about this here. Nobody hurt me. You don’t have to pretend like you care.”
He blew out a heavy breath. “Who said I was pretending? I’m not that much of an asshole. If a girl is hurt, I’m sure as hell not going to ignore it. And if you’re protecting some guy you’re seeing—”
“Nate didn’t do this!” I blasted, offended he’d make that assumption. My attention shifted to Iris. “I’ve had enough fun for the night. I’m leaving.”
She began sliding out of the booth, but I held my hand up to stop her.
“I’m tired and won’t be good company right now,” I told her, shrugging. “I’ll see you at work tomorrow.”
She relented, nodding. The others said goodbye. Well, not Caleb. He decided to walk me outside despite my protests. His intense gaze burned holes into the side of my skull the entire way.
“Are you going to tell me what happened?”
I stopped. “Can’t you just mind your own business? Is it that hard?”
“As a matter of fact, yes,” he replied coolly.
I groaned loudly. “You have no right to be in my business, Caleb.”
“Why?”
I blinked. “Is that even a serious question?” His blank stare told me it was. “I don’t like games, okay? I’m not the type of girl who lets guys walk all over her.”
“I’m not that guy. I texted you—”
“Two weeks, Caleb!” I hissed. “You left me hanging for fourteen days, making me feel like a complete idiot. I won’t let you play house with my emotions. Especially not when you’re so judgmental over someone else doing the same thing.”
I sucked in a breath of air, tipping my head, and then walking away. It was embarrassing to argue with him. He called my name when I got a few feet away, suddenly stopping in front of me to cut off my path.
“Hear me out,” he pleaded.
“Caleb—”
“Iris would never put you in a situation where you got hurt,” he reasoned. “She wouldn’t even consider trying to set us up if she knew I’d hurt you. She cares about you. So, let me explain why I couldn’t reach out right away. Give me five minutes.”
I wanted to tell him no, but he had a point. His sister wouldn’t put me in a place where the other person was just a waste of time.
“You get two,” I bargained.
He gave me a small smile. “I had to take care of some shit at work. I know it’s vague, but I can’t go into details. If it could have waited, I wouldn’t have left.”
“Left?”
“Had to fly back to base.”
“Oh.”
He nodded. “I couldn’t get your number from Iris because I got called away the same night. There was no time to tell you I’d be gone, and no time frame as to when I’d be back. I didn’t want to make empty promises to you and then not deliver. As soon as I got home, I made sure to reach out. But you didn’t reply, so here I am begging for your understanding.”
I vaguely remember Iris telling me once that Caleb was stationed at Fort Knox. I’d never been to Kentucky, or any army base for that matter, but I guess it made sense that he was radio silent if he was called back suddenly.
Could I fault him for that?
“If it makes you feel better, Iris didn’t tell me you guys were here. I may have hacked into her phone and read where you were going.”
“You did what?”
He shrugged innocently. “I go after what I want. Will do pretty much anything to get it done. So …”
I shook my head. “So, what?”
“Do you forgive me?”
My shoulders slumped. My pride was about to take a hit. I didn’t want to forgive him yet. I’d rather just change the subject altogether.
“I fell,” I blurted.
“Huh?”
I blushed. I could feel the heat rising over my cheeks and collar bones. “I fell. That’s what happened to my face.”
His eyes narrowed. “Are you telling me that as a distraction?”
I shifted on my feet. “You asked what happened. I answered. You’re welcome.”
What I wasn’t going to admit was that I’d hurt myself doing stupider things. Like bruising my ass trying to take my pants off. Or tripping over the cat only to realize it wasn’t Mashed Potato at all, but my own damn foot.
Graceful, I was not.
He grinned. “I’ll let it slide if it means we can keep talking. Walk you home?”
My brows shot up. “Uh…”
He eyed me, his brows furrowing in. “I just want to make sure you get home without falling on your ass again. If you were Iris, I’d be doing the same.”
The pretenses were different and we both knew it. But I didn’t doubt for one second he was protective of his big sister. He seemed like the type to ensure anybody’s safety, like the night I’d gone to Nate’s house for the first time.
He saw the moment my resolve crumbled. It caused him to tip his lips in victory, falling into step with my easy tempo as we walked down the sidewalk.
“So…” Shoving his hands into his pockets, he looked up at the night sky. It was blanketed with pretty little stars that lit up our way.
“You and Iris seem close,” I mumbled to break the silence. Maybe if I chose the topic of conversation, it’d keep things mild.
From his profile, I saw his lips slip into a soft smile. “Yeah, we are. We’ve got another brother, but he’s not really in the picture. It’s always just Iris and me.”
I rubbed my bare arm, trying to rid of the goosebumps peppering my skin. It wasn’t cold out, but the breeze was strong enough to nip at my skin uncomfortably.
“What about your parents?”
He glanced at me. “Happily married for over thirty-five years. What about you? Siblings? Parents?”
“My parents are still together after almost thirty years,” I answered. “But it’s just me. Although, I’ve got a cousin who I’m close with. He’s a nut, but…”
“He’s your nut,” he concluded.
I just smiled.
“So, how’d you fall?”
I internally groaned. “Just did.”
“You’re evading the question.”
“Darn, am I that obvious?” I acknowledged with another famous eye roll.
He snickered. “All right, smartass. I get it, you don’t want me in your business. Have you considered that people are worried about you?”
“People like you?” I scoffed. “You don’t know me.”
He stopped walking. “I’m trying to.”
I didn’t stop, making him jog to catch up to me. “Is it weird for you to think that someone would want to get to know you?”
I got hit on all the time. Men flirted, sweet-talked, and charmed me. But it was because they wanted to sleep with me, use my body. It wasn’t because they cared. Nate was the first person to catch my interest and he seemed like he meant well. But he held me without trying to take things further and he never kissed me like I expected him to.
…like I’d wanted him to.
If I had met Caleb first, it might have worked out. Instead, I was hung up on a guy who wouldn’t text me back.
His phone was broken.
No, it’s not.
“Hey,” he said softly. “Don’t tell me that a guy’s never expressed interest. That would be a crime.”
I refrained from rolling my eyes. “Guys express plenty of interest. None of which I want.”
“Why? Don’t believe in love?”
My teeth smashed together, grinding.
It was hard to believe in something you had never felt before. Hell, I wasn’t even sure I’d been privy enough to witness real love. Puppy love, sure. Infatuation, plenty. But not the soul crushing, heart aching, bleed me dry kind of thing.
I thought of the way my chest tightened around Nate, and how I smiled when he held me. Did that make him feel the same way I did? I think I knew the answer to my own question without having to dig deep. I just didn’t want to face the truth.
“Maybe love doesn’t believe in me,” I whispered, knowing everyone had five seconds to send a text. It didn’t matter how many excuses I made for him, deep down I knew. I knew.
“Paisley…”
“Don’t,” I sighed. “Just don’t.”
“You can’t believe that.”
“Well, I do.”
“But why?”
Now I was the one who stopped, making him abruptly come to a halt. “Guys don’t think I’m worth the time, okay? They want to fuck me. That’s it.”
My mind went back in time to freshman year move in day. Tyler Grayson lived down the hall, and since he had finished unpacking he helped the other families carry things into their dorm room.
Tyler was the kind of beautiful you couldn’t ignore. Like if Jason Mamoa and Zac Efron suddenly turned gay and had a love child…yeah, that would be Tyler.
It was hard not to want to be with him. Even when he proved himself unworthy of my time. From the start he lied about where he was, who he was with, and what he was doing. I was the naïve girl who believed every word soaked in glitter and promises. I could admit there were more good times than there were bad, but even now, looking back, those good times were tainted by his deceiving ways.
I made myself believe things were developing when he had given no indication of the sorts. In fact, when we first started hanging out he said he liked to “play the field.” But like every other young and innocent girl, I wanted to change his bad boy ways. He’d hold my hand at the movies and pay for my lunches, but he wouldn’t kiss me in the quad or drop me off at class.
The first time we kissed, he hadn’t been expecting it. I misread the signs, thinking he was leaning in to kiss me, only he’d really been leaning down to pick my bag up from the floor. Things between us had changed after that, touches becoming more frequent—hand holding, leg brushing, hugging. Tyler seemed to like my awkward self, and I delved into the world of fantasy, one where we could live happily ever after. I barely made it out alive when I found him sleeping with my roommate.
I’ve heard it said that people find their forever loves in college. My parents included. It didn’t seem far-fetched until Tyler came into my life. He’d been my best friend until I accidently kissed him.
I should have never kissed him.
“Hey,” Caleb crooned. “Look at me.”
The soft crystal color of his eyes darkened as he reached out, stopping just before he touched my arm. Withdrawing his hand, he shook his head.
“Who hurt you?” he whispered.
It wasn’t Tyler or Lucas or Connor that popped into my head over the question.
It was only Nate’s face I saw.