Bad Boy Secret Baby Romance Collection

THE QUARTERBACK’S SECRET BABY

Chapter 1

Amanda nearly dropped a tray of dirty dishes when an old man pinched her ass as she walked by. She ground her teeth and shot him a glare, but she kept her mouth shut. She'd complained to the boss on more than one occasion about the behavior of the customers, but Spiro didn't care about anything but the restaurant's sales at the end of the day. If a customer kept coming back week after week and spending money, then he wanted that customer treated like gold.

Not that the assholes who treated her like a piece of meat ever tipped well. She'd be lucky if he left her a dollar on the table after he left. But Spiro only cared about the amount of money he made, not what his staff made.

She dropped the dirty dishes off in the back, then printed out the check for one of her other tables. She took the long way around to drop off the check, so she could avoid walking by the perv's table again. She also noticed the perv's drink needed to be refilled, but as far as she was concerned, he could wait. Maybe if she gave him bad service, he'd stop coming back. Spiro would complain about losing a customer, but Amanda had better things to do with her time than be manhandled by someone who didn't even tip.

She dropped off the check at the other table. “Is there anything else I can get you?” she asked, keeping her fake smile on her face.

“You can give me your phone number,” the man said, winking at her.

Amanda rolled her eyes. Max was one of her regulars, and while he never got handsy with her the way some of her other customers did, he was relentlessly hitting on her. But he was at least friendly about it, and he never took it the wrong way when she shot him down, so she tried to at least have some fun with it. “My phone's probably getting shut off next week, Max,” she said, giving him a playful smirk. “Tell you what, wait until I win the lottery, then we'll see.”

He chuckled and shook his head. “You either make too many calls, or you're not being paid enough here.”

“Little of both,” Amanda said. “Mostly the latter.”

She flashed him a genuine smile as she took his empty plate. Max, at least, was a decent tipper.

She took a quick glance at her other tables. Aside from the perv needing a drink refill, it looked like everyone was doing fine. She'd have just enough time to slip out for a quick smoke.

She kept an eye out for Spiro as she cut back through the dish room and out the back door. The boss didn't much care for his employees smoking on the clock. But Spiro only paid her $2.13 per hour, which was the minimum wage when you earned the rest of your pay from tips, so she didn't really care what he thought. She ducked behind the dumpster, trying to ignore the smell as she pulled out her Parliament Menthols and lit one up. She never smoked at home, because she didn't want to expose her son to secondhand smoke, which meant she had to get her fill while she was at work.

While she was smoking, and dreading the next three hours of her shift, her phone buzzed in her pocket. She pulled it out and saw it was a text from her friend Michelle. She almost ignored it. Michelle had been a real party girl ever since high school, and had only gotten worse when she moved away for college. Whenever she stopped back in town during a school break, she wanted to go out drinking and cruising for guys. Amanda didn't have the time, between working two jobs and taking care of her son, for that kind of life. As much as she felt like a jerk for ignoring Michelle's texts half the time, she knew she just couldn't deal with being dragged out for a weekend of partying.

She read the text, already composing a response in her head. She needed to make a good excuse in order to get out of going drinking without hurting Michelle's feelings in the process. Though when she read the text, she nearly dropped her phone.

Hey, Mandy! You need to clear your plans for the weekend. I'm coming home, and guess what? I'M GETTING MARRIED!

Amanda was still staring at the text, trying to process it, when her phone buzzed again with another incoming text.

You'll be there, right? Promise you will! I need my bestie there as my maid of honor!

Amanda held her cigarette between her lips and typed out a response. She didn't see how she could get out of going to her friend's wedding, especially if Michelle wanted her to be maid of honor. Her head was spinning as she typed out her response: Holy crap! Since when are you getting married? Why such short notice? Of course I'll be there.

Just before Amanda headed back in to check on her tables, she got another response from Michelle: Long story, I'll explain when I see you. But Blake only has this weekend available, so it has to be now. OMG! I'm so excited! See you soon!

Amanda tucked away her phone and went back to check on her tables. The man who'd pinched her started complaining about how he'd been waiting ten minutes to have his drink refilled. She muttered a completely insincere apology and went to fetch him a new Coke. Then she finished clearing off Max's table, and stopped, stunned, when she saw the tip that he'd left.

It was a $50 bill. She knew Max had decent money—at least, compared to the usual crowd that came into the diner—but he was never this generous. She immediately felt a surge of guilt about her lie about her phone being shut off. Her bills were tight, but not so tight that she couldn't keep up with them, albeit barely. Max must have taken her excuse to get out of giving him her phone number as a genuine plea.

She pocketed the money, trying not to feel guilty about it. Though she immediately felt better when the perv at the next table only left her seventy-eight cents. She'd earned Max's big tip, if only because she had to put up with so much shit from the rest of her customers.

When her shift was finally over, she took the bus home, then stopped by her neighbor's apartment to pick up her son, James. Mrs. Carter was a stay at home mom, and she watched James for free, in exchange for Amanda watching her son a few times a week so Mrs. Carter could run errands or have a night out with her husband.

“Come on, kiddo,” she said, taking James's hand. “Time for dinner.”

“But I don't wanna go,” James said, stomping his foot.

Mrs. Carter shot Amanda an apologetic smile. “He's been in a mood today.”

“I have not!” James protested, stomping his foot again.

“I'm sorry, kiddo,” Amanda said, scooping James up and holding him against her hip. “You can come back and play tomorrow.”

James made a frustrated sound as she carried him down the hall to their apartment. She set him down on the couch and did her best to clean the place up a bit before dinner. The apartment was eternally a mess, and she had long since given up on ever getting it truly clean. She just tried to maintain a certain level of disarray.

“What do you want for dinner?” she asked as she looked through the cabinets.

“Pizza.”

“We don't have pizza,” she said. She considered using Max's $50 to order out, and save herself the hassle of cooking, but she really needed to put it towards paying off her credit card. “How about pasta? That's Italian, too.”

James grumbled, but since he wasn't old enough to cook for himself, Amanda figured he could deal with her making whatever she wanted. She set the water to boil, then went into the living room to sit on the couch next to her son.

He'd turned the TV on, and the Monday night football game was playing. She frowned at the TV. “Hey, isn't there cartoons on?”

“No,” James said, pouting. “I wanna watch them play!”

Amanda sighed and leaned back against the couch. James loved playing and running outdoors, though she rarely got the chance to take him out anymore. She didn't want to deny him the chance to watch the game, even if watching it brought back painful memories for her.

James clutched his Nerf football to his chest as he watched the players running across the field. Amanda watched just one player in particular, the quarterback, Cole Reed. Michelle's brother.

She sighed and leaned forward, propping her chin in her hands. She usually didn't want to admit it, but Cole was another reason why she'd been avoiding Michelle so much over the years. When they'd been in high school, Cole had been in college, and already making a name for himself playing for his college football team. Amanda had crushed on him pretty hard, mooning over him whenever he came back to town during school breaks. She'd been pretty sure he'd barely known that she existed, and she was even more sure now that he'd completely forgotten her entire existence. After all, they had just had one night together. The night she gave him her virginity.

She glanced at James, the memories rushing back once more. She'd been a bit drunk, thanks to Cole and his college friends buying alcohol for Amanda and Michelle's high school graduation party. There had been dozens of kids there, including half of Cole's college football team who'd driven down for the party, and for the chance to score with some eager and willing high school girls. Amanda still didn't know if Cole had put the moves on her because she had been wearing a tight, low-cut dress that night, or because he'd been drunk enough to forget that she was his sister's best friend. And she hadn't cared what his reasons were. When he asked her to go upstairs, she'd been more than willing.

The rest of the night after that was a blur. She remembered that it had felt amazing, after the initial pain, of course. She remembered Cole's stamina, how he'd wanted to go at it again and again. She remembered getting down on her knees for him, when she was too sore to let him inside her again, and how rough and controlling he'd been with his hand on the back of her head, forcing her to swallow.

Most of all, she remembered that he'd been gone in the morning. She'd woken up, naked, sticky, and hung over, in his bed. After she'd gotten dressed and headed downstairs, Michelle had told her that Cole and his friends had driven back to their school. He hadn't even said goodbye.

And Amanda hadn't seen him since. Well, except for when she saw him on TV. And when she looked at James – yes, she saw that resemblance! She'd never told Cole that he was the father, and had never told Michelle that she was an aunt. After how humiliated she'd been that he'd used her as a one-night stand, she had never been able to bring herself to admit the truth. Not to anyone.

She could only hope that Cole wouldn't be at Michelle's wedding this weekend. It was hard for her to imagine him skipping his sister's wedding. But he hadn't been back home in years. After he'd been first draft pick right out of college, he'd been too absorbed in his success and fame to care about the town that he'd left behind. And she was certain that even if he did see her, he wouldn't even remember her name.

Chapter 2

Cole woke up to discover a naked woman draped across his body, drooling on his shoulder. He looked down at her, thinking that she definitely didn't look as hot now as she'd seemed last night. Maybe it was because he'd had a few beers after the game. Or maybe he'd been so high on the team's victory that he hadn't cared who he went to bed with.

He pulled himself away from the woman and got out of the hotel room bed. He searched for his pants, and by the time he found them, the woman was waking up. She sat up in the bed, the blanket falling away from her naked body. Now that he got a better look at her from the neck down, he saw the appeal. Though he wondered what it said about him that he couldn't quite look her in the eye.

“Hey,” she said, giving him a tired smile. “That was some night last night.”

“Yeah,” he said noncommittally. “I guess.”

Last night hadn't been anything special to him. Sure, he was always glad for the chance to score with one of the women that were always fawning all over him after a game. It was one of the perks of being the quarterback. But this woman hadn't left any more of an impression on him than any of the others had. Heck, he couldn't even remember her name.

She got out of bed while he was pulling on his pants. She sauntered over to him and draped her arms around his shoulders. “Why in such a rush?” she asked. “I thought we could have another go before breakfast.”

“Sorry, babe,” he said, pulling away. He grabbed his shirt and pulled it on. “I've got a flight to catch.”

She frowned at him. “What, off to another game?”

He snorted. “I wish. I have to head back home.”

She planted her hands on her hips. “I see.”

He rolled his eyes. “It's not like that. My sister's getting married, and for some reason, she decided to do it back home in New Jersey. So I've got to catch a plane back to East Bumblefuck.”

“Whatever,” she said, waving her hands dismissively. “I should have known you were just another horny jock.”

She pulled on her dress and headed to the door with her shoes in one hand and her panties in the other. She glanced at him from the door as she was shoving her panties into her purse. “See you around,” she said. “I guess.”

Cole let out a long sigh, shaking his head. He could have been offended, but the girl had the right to be pissy with him. He hadn't taken the time to learn her name, or even buy her breakfast. He felt like a complete tool.

He sat on the edge of the bed, pulling on his shoes and thinking about where he was in his life. Sure, he had a great sports career, and with it plenty of fame and plenty of money. And for the first couple of years, banging a different chick every night had been a great time. But after a while it was starting to get a bit stale. The sex was still physically good, but it was leaving him wanting something more.

He tried to think back over all the women he'd been with in the last few years. He found he couldn't remember any of their names. Not a single one.

He wracked his brain, trying to come up with a single name. The only one he could remember was...Amanda.

He leaned back on his elbows, staring at the ceiling. Amanda. That was a name he hadn't thought about in a long time. His sister's best friend. He was pretty sure she'd had a crush on him for years before they finally shared that one night together. He'd had a bit of a thing for her himself. But over the years, whenever Michelle had caught him staring at her friend, she'd made a point to tell him there was no way it would happen. She'd lectured him on more than one occasion, telling him she knew the reputation he'd developed, even back in college, and how she was not going to let her best friend become just another one of his conquests. He'd protested more than once that it wouldn't be like that...but then, he had probably been fooling himself.

He still felt like a chump for leaving her that night. He'd gotten up early, while Amanda was still in his bed, and headed downstairs for some breakfast. Michelle had confronted him in the kitchen, accusing him of taking advantage of Amanda and using her while she was drunk and vulnerable. He'd been so drunk the night before that he couldn't remember who had initiated things, him or Amanda. But the way Michelle painted the picture, he'd practically been a predator, seducing the young, shy, virgin girl and luring her into his bed.

After Michelle had finished berating him, he'd been so ashamed that he'd left without going back upstairs to even say goodbye. He'd felt bad about that for years. There had been more than one time, early on, that he'd asked Michelle about her, trying to keep up with how Amanda was doing, whether she was seeing anyone. But Michelle had refused to even give him Amanda's phone number, and she'd eventually told him to stop asking about her.

He stared at the ceiling, wondering about how Amanda was doing. She'd been a sweet girl. Sure, it had only been one night. But even before that, whenever she was over at the house, studying with Michelle, he'd enjoyed her company. He remembered her being funny, and smart, and full of energy.

If he was going to be back in town anyway, he wondered if maybe he could look her up. But...no, he knew he couldn't. Michelle would probably still be bad at him for seducing her friend and then leaving her after a one-night stand. And besides, Amanda had probably moved on. She'd been a beautiful and amazing girl. She must have found someone else by now.

He got up and finished throwing the rest of his clothes into a bag, then headed downstairs to check out and head to the airport. Maybe he'd ask Michelle about her friend when he got into town. It couldn't hurt to ask.

Chapter 3

Amanda looked at herself in the mirror one last time. She was wearing a skimpy black dress she'd first bought more than two years ago for a date. The date, as she recalled, had ended badly, with the guy feeling her up in the front seat of his car while they were parked outside Amanda's apartment, then getting mad when she wouldn't invite him upstairs. She hadn't wanted to sleep with anyone on the first date—her experience with Cole had made her wary of one night stands—and she definitely wasn't going to bring anyone upstairs while her son was in the apartment with the babysitter.

The dress was probably a little too flirty to wear to meet her friend's fiance, but it was the newest and nicest thing she owned. It had been years since she'd been able to afford new clothes, other than a few cheap pairs of jeans and t-shirts from Walmart. It was either this dress, or something that was old, frayed, and possibly stained. James had once had the bad habit of vomiting all over her clothes when he was an infant, and her wardrobe had never recovered.

The doorbell rang. She hurried into the living room and scooped James up in her arms. “Come on, sweetie, you get to spend the night at Mrs. Carter's and play with Billy.

She dropped her son off at the neighbor's, then headed downstairs. Michelle was waiting at the door, wearing an expensive-looking dress. It was hard to tell at a glance, but Amanda was guessing it was a designer label.

“Hey, you!” Michelle squealed and took Amanda's hands, shaking them excitedly. “Oh my God, I've missed you so much!”

“Hey,” Amanda said, trying to put as much enthusiasm into her voice as Michelle had in hers. “It's good to see you.”

“I can't wait for you to meet Blake,” Michelle said. She led Amanda to the car. It was a luxury rental, and Amanda tried not to think about how much it must have cost. It was starting to look like Michelle was marrying money. Amanda was a little jealous.

Amanda got into the backseat. Blake half turned in his seat to flash a smile at her. He was a gorgeous man, dressed in an expensive silk shirt and a black blazer. Even his designer sunglasses looked like they cost more than Amanda made in a week.

“Blake, this is my absolute best friend ever, Amanda.” Michelle gestured from the front seat, a huge smile on her face. “Amanda, this is my man.”

“Nice to meet you,” Blake said. He eyed her over the rim of his sunglasses for a moment, smiling flirtatiously. Then he turned around and put the car into gear. “I hope you brought your appetite.”

“I'm starved,” Amanda said. She had skipped lunch when Michelle called to say that Blake insisted on taking them all out to dinner. She felt a little guilty about taking advantage of his generosity, but she planned to fill up at dinner as long as the meal was on Blake. Though from the looks of things, he could more than afford to treat them to a night out.

Blake took them to a fancy restaurant in a part of the city Amanda never went into. She usually considered a night at Applebee's to be a luxury. This place was so upscale it made Applebee's look like her old high school cafeteria. They even took reservations, and someone at the front offered to take Blake's coat.

They sat and ate, and at first the conversation was all about the wedding. Michelle went on and on about all of the last-minute planning that had gone into it, how they were flying in a photographer from Boston because they'd needed someone who could work on short notice, and how her dress was being shipped in from Paris. Amanda sat there, stunned, having a hard time processing how the girl she'd went to high school with had somehow managed to snag someone who was rich enough to spoil her like this.

When there was finally a pause in Michelle's wedding-related rants, Amanda asked, “So, how did you two meet?”

“Well,” Michelle said, “you remember how I told you I was doing everything I could to land a part in a commercial to jump-start my acting career?”

“Yeah,” Amanda said, her face turning red. She distinctly remembered Michelle saying she'd be willing to sleep with a producer or director if it would get her a part.

“Well, Blake here,” Michelle squeezed Blake's arm, flashing him a smile, “had some really fascinating projects in the works. He gave me a chance to audition, and, well, one thing led to another.” She shrugged, still smiling innocently. Though from the smirk on Blake's face, Amanda was pretty sure that Michelle's “audition” had been performed on her back.

“So, did you get the part?” Amanda asked.

Michelle waved her hand dismissively. “Oh, I've been too busy to worry about that sort of thing anymore. Besides, once we get married, I won't need to work. Blake's going to take care of me.”

Amanda chewed on the inside of her cheek, trying not to stare at Blake. She had a hard time with the idea of him convincing Michelle to settle down and be the wife. No doubt he'd expect her to raise their kids, if they had any, while he continued focusing on his fabulous Hollywood career. But there had been a time when all Michelle could talk about was pursuing her acting career. If she had really given it up that easily, all for a man, then that was about the saddest thing Amanda could think of.

But then again, Michelle looked happy. Amanda wasn't about to rain on her parade.

“That's great,” Amanda said. She sipped at her wine, trying not to think about the price Blake had paid for it. “I hope you two are happy together.”

“We are,” Michelle said, clinging to Blake's arm. “I've found the perfect man, and I couldn't be happier.”

Blake shrugged and a smug smirk spread across his face. “Well, I guess she knew a good thing when she saw one.”

Amanda fought the urge to roll her eyes.

“So,” Michelle said, “the talk has all been about the wedding, and you haven't told me anything about you! How've you been?”

Amanda shrugged and looked away, toying with her fork. She didn't much care to talk about how she was working two jobs to support her son, and how she hadn't been on a date, or even had a night out with friends, in almost a year. “I'm getting by,” she said. “You know how it is. But James is doing great. He's going to be starting preschool in the fall.”

“Oh, that's great!” Michelle grinned wide. “I miss the little guy. You should have brought him with you.”

Blake shot Michelle a cautious look. “How old is he, exactly?”

“Four,” Amanda said.

Blake gave her a level stare. “Are you planning to bring him to the wedding?”

Amanda frowned, grinding her teeth. “Well, yeah. It's kind of a big event. I'm sure he's going to love it.”

“It's just,” Blake said, “I don't think there's really going to be any other kids there.”

Amanda was about to snap and say that if her son wasn't welcome, she wouldn't be coming either. But Michelle interjected. “It'll be fine.” Michelle waved a hand dismissively. “He's old enough that he won't be crying or anything. Besides, he should be there when his Aunt Michelle gets married.”

Amanda froze, a chill running down her spine. As far as she knew, Michelle had no idea that she was actually James's aunt. She was sure Michelle had just meant it figuratively, the way some kids referred to their mom's best friend as an aunt.

Though it made Amanda remember her other big concern about the weekend. “Is Cole going to be there?”

Michelle's expression dropped and she pressed her lips together in a thin line. “Yeah. Yeah, he is.”

Amanda felt her face heat up.

“Hey, I need to go to the bathroom,” Michelle said.

“Me too.” Amanda got up to join her.

Once they were in the privacy of the bathroom, Michelle started touching up her makeup in the mirror. “Is everything going to be okay with you and Cole?” she asked.

“Yeah,” Amanda said, shrugging. “I mean, I guess so. It was a long time ago. I don't really care anymore.”

“I was mad at him for a long time for what he did to you,” Michelle said. “I still can't believe he took advantage of you like that.”

“Yeah,” Amanda said, letting out a nervous laugh. Looking back on it now, she wasn't sure whether she'd been taken advantage of. She'd wanted it. Wanted him. Wanted to give herself to him. If not for how he'd run out on her in the morning and never called again, she would have been happy.

“Has he ever...asked about me?” Amanda asked, looking into the mirror in order to avoid meeting Michelle's eye.

Michelle glanced at her sidelong while she reapplied her lipstick. “Not for a while.”

“Not for a while?” Amanda frowned and turned to Michelle. “What do you mean?”

Michelle shrugged. “Well, he asked about you a couple of times, years ago. I told him to leave you alone. I didn't want him leading you on.”

“What? You...you told him not to call me?”

“Well, yeah.” Michelle pouted, putting her hands on Amanda's shoulders “Look, hon, you had enough on your plate. After you started dating Robert and he got you knocked up, I knew the last thing you needed was my brother trying to cheat his way into your pants again. You were better off.”

“Yeah,” Amanda said, frowning and turning away. “Maybe.” Of course, Michelle didn't know that Amanda had never slept with Robert. She'd gone on two or three dates with him over the summer after high school, then broken up with him when she'd found out that she was pregnant. Claiming the baby was Robert's had been the less humiliating option, especially since he'd moved to Florida for college in the fall. Amanda had never heard from him again, and she didn't much care if Michelle thought he was a deadbeat dad. It was better than her knowing that her brother was the father.

Though as they returned to the table and the conversation returned to the wedding and the rehearsal dinner, she was reminded once again that she would soon have to face Cole for the first time in years. And she had no idea what she was going to say to him.

Chapter 4

Cole pulled his rental car up to his parents' house, then stopped to look at the long line of cars that stretched down the block on both sides of the street. He had never seen it this busy here before. The house was in the wealthier part of town—he'd bought his parents a new house with the money from his first big signing bonus, as a thank you for all of their support through his high school and college years. The neighborhood was far from crowded, and he didn't know what was going on.

When he walked into the house, he was greeted with applause. There were dozens of people there. Some of them were old high school friends, plus people he knew from his dad's country club, and others from his mom's book club. But there were many more he didn't know.

“Welcome home, son,” his dad said, shaking his hand and clapping him on the back.

“Thanks. What's all this?” He gestured around to the large crowd.

“Well, when word got around that you were coming home, there were a bunch of people that wanted to meet you. It started off as a small gathering, but I guess it grew into quite a party.”

He had little choice but to make the rounds and start greeting people. Most of them fawned over him, the men asking him about the latest game and whether he thought his team was going to the Superbowl. Men who had yelled at him when he was a boy—for smashing their pumpkins on Halloween or playing football in the street and blocking traffic—now shook his hand and treated him like he was a prince. His junior high English teacher, who'd once called him “a worthless little shit who was never going to go anywhere with his life,” came up to him, patted him on the back, and raved about how he'd always known that Cole was going to be a success.

And then there were the girls. He recognized a few of them from his high school days: girls who had never so much as given him the time of day. Now they wanted to talk to him and catch up on old times. Others he didn't know at all, though they all said they'd met him at some point or another. The younger sister of this girl he went to school with, the cousin of some other girl who had supposedly been on the cheerleading squad, and others with vaguer connections they used as an excuse to talk to him. More than one asked him if he had a date for the wedding, but he evaded the question every time. He wasn't sure what was going on with the wedding, but he wasn't interested in going with some random girl who only cared about him because his name had been on the news a few times.

By the time he'd made his way through most of the crowd, he realized there was one person that wasn't here. The one person he'd actually been looking forward to seeing again.

Eventually he decided to just bite the bullet and ask about her. He corralled his sister into Dad's study and shut the door behind them so they could have some privacy. “Hey,” he said. “Some party, huh?”

“Yeah.” She smirked and stuck her hands in her pockets. “It was supposed to be a wedding party for me, but I think most of these people just showed up to see you.”

Her tone was teasing and playful, but Cole couldn't help but feel a bit guilty. “Sorry about that. If I'd known they were planning something like this, I would have gotten them to cancel it.”

“Oh, sure. Like Dad would give up the chance to show off his famous son for the whole town to see.”

Cole laughed and shook his head. “Yeah, I guess he likes having the chance to live in the spotlight.”

He cleared his throat, then pushed forward onto the topic he really wanted to ask about. “So, hey, listen. How's your friend Amanda been? Is she coming to the wedding?”

Michelle's expression dropped into a cold stare. “What do you care? You haven't seen her in years.”

Cole shrugged, rubbing the back of his head and looking down at the carpet. “I dunno. I just wondered if she was going to be around. It'd be nice to catch up.”

Michelle crossed her arms, eyeing him suspiciously. “Well, she'll be in the wedding. But I'm sure she's going to be too busy to catch up. Bridesmaid duties and all that.”

“Hmm.” Cole rubbed his chin. “Well, maybe we can get together before the wedding. I've got nothing but free time this weekend. Any chance you can give me her number? I'd really like to get in touch with her.”

Michelle stared him down, chewing on her lip. “Well, she just got a new phone,” she said. “I don't have the new number yet. So, I guess you're out of luck.”

Michelle walked past him and out the door. Cole watched her go, frowning at her back. He had the feeling Michelle was lying to him, but there wasn't a whole lot he could do about it. It wasn't like he could steal her phone and go through her contacts list.

But now he was more determined than ever to track Amanda down. How hard could it be? They lived in a small town, and there were plenty of other people he could ask. It shouldn't be too difficult, he figured, to find a way to get into touch with her.

Chapter 5

Amanda worked a double on Friday, to make up for the hours she was going to lose by going to Michelle's wedding. It was a long, grueling shift, and by the end of it, her feet were so sore that she had to lean on the counter as she walked. She really wanted nothing more than to go home, stick her feet in the cheap little foot bath she'd gotten for Christmas a couple of years ago, and forget about the rest of the world. Though her shift wasn't quite over yet, and the end of the night always seemed to drag on and on.

She was down to her last table of the night, and she was spending most of her time finishing up side work so that she'd be able to go home on time. Tonight's side work was refilling all of the ketchup bottles; the diner washed and reused the ketchup bottles to save money, and refilled them from a bulk container. She had a line of ketchup bottles set up on a table near the back, with the mostly-empty bottles turned upside-down and balanced atop others to drain ketchup into them, so the empty bottles could be washed. It was a tedious and sticky process, though she had to admit it was better than what she went through changing out the salt and pepper shakers.

She was starting to load the emptied bottles onto a disk rack when the bell over the door sounded, announcing the arrival of another customer. She sighed and let out a low groan. Late-night customers could be some of the worst, especially when they didn't understand that half the kitchen was already being shut down, so certain items from the menu weren't available this late at night. She hauled the ketchup bottles back to the dish room, then headed up front, grabbing a menu for the guy who'd just walked in the door.

“Hi,” Amanda said. “Just a table for one?”

“Hey, Amanda.”

Amanda froze in place, looking up at the guy's face. A familiar, handsome face.

Cole.

“What...why...?” She stared at him, then looked awkwardly around the empty dining room, brushing a strand of hair back over her ear. She had still been working up the courage to face him at the wedding itself. She was completely unprepared for him to just walk into the diner like this.

“I heard you worked here,” Cole said. “I wanted to see you. You...you look great.”

Amanda turned her face away. She was sure Cole was just being polite. Her uniform was stained, she smelled like soggy hash browns, and her hair was a mess. Plus she'd put on a fair bit of weight during her pregnancy, and four years of eating mostly diner food at work and frozen dinners at home hadn't done her waistline any favors. Though the smile Cole was giving her certainly seemed genuine.

“I'm busy,” she said. “I can't...I can't really have people coming here while I work.”

“What if I order something?” Cole sat in the first booth, giving her a playful smile. “What's good? Do you have pie?”

Amanda shrugged, chewing on her lip. “It's not fresh. I mean, I guess it's okay.”

“Pie sounds good then,” Cole said. “Something chocolaty? And a cup of coffee.”

“Sure.” Amanda set the menu down and went to cut Cole a slice of the chocolate cream pie. She brought it over to him along with a cup of black coffee. Then she stood there awkwardly, playing with the strands of her apron.

“How've you been?” Cole asked. He looked up at her, toying with his fork, not touching the pie.

“I'm...I'm really good,” she said, forcing a smile. There was no way she was going to admit to Cole, the superstar quarterback, that she was living in poverty while raising his son all by herself. “Things have been great. Really great.”

“Are you in school? I remember you were going to some music school. You were like, in the band, right?”

Amanda let out a wry laugh, shaking her head. She hadn't touched a musical instrument in years. “Yeah, that umm...didn't work out.”

The truth was, she'd been forced to drop out of the music school in her second semester. She'd managed to struggle her way through one semester even while she was pregnant with James, but after he'd been born, she'd had her hands full, and she hadn't been able to get back into classes. For a while she'd promised herself that it was only a temporary break, and that she'd get back into school when she got the chance. But it was looking more and more like that chance had long since passed her by, and her old flute was just collecting dust somewhere in the back of her closet.

“Well, that's a shame,” Cole said. “So, what have you been up to? Are you...seeing anyone?”

She shook her head. “I don't really have much time for dating.”

“What about the wedding?” Cole flashed her a charming smile. “Michelle said you're going to be one of her bridesmaids. Are you bringing anyone? Cause if not, well, I was wondering...”

“Wondering what?” Amanda said, scowling at him. “Wondering if I'd hook up with you after the wedding?”

“What? No, it's not like that.”

“Then what is it like?” Amanda planted her hands on her hips, staring him down. “We slept together once, over five years ago, and you figured you've made your way through enough other girls by now that you want to start back at the beginning?” She'd heard a thing or two about Cole's reputation with girls. From what she understood, she wasn't the only one he'd tossed to the curb when he was done with her.

“Look, I...” Cole spread his hands, looking up at her apologetically. But if he meant to apologize, the words seemed to die in his throat.

He got up and took a step towards the door. “I just thought maybe you'd like to catch up is all,” he said. “I know it's been a long time, and I know maybe I lost my chance, back in the day. But I just...”

He shook his head and turned away. “I guess I'll see you around,” he said.

Amanda watched him leave. She wanted to go out and talk to him. To find out if he really wanted to “catch up,” or if he was just trying to get back into her pants. To tell him that he had a son, and that he had an obligation to help take care of him. But she couldn't find the words.

Her thoughts were interrupted when her last table started calling for her, asking for their check. She handed them their check and cleared their plates. When she came back up from the dish room, she found they'd left her a whole two dollars. She tucked it into the pocket of her apron, fighting back the tears that welled in her eyes.

She finished cleaning up and refilling the ketchup bottles, hurrying as much as she could so she wouldn't miss the last bus home. The entire time, she kept thinking about Cole, about him being back in town, and about whether she'd have the courage to ever come forward and tell him the truth about his son. She was so distracted that she didn't finish her work on time, and she was still wiping down her tables in the back dining room when she looked out the window and saw her bus driving past.

She muttered a curse, clocked out, and hurried out the door, hoping she could catch up to the bus at the next stop down the road. But the bus made every green light and drove on ahead, soon vanishing out of sight.

She sighed and started trudging down the road for the long walk home, pulling out her phone to call Mrs. Carter and let her know that she'd be late picking up James.

Chapter 6

After he left the diner, Cole drove his rental car around town, wandering aimlessly. His thoughts were clouded, and all he could think about was what an ass he'd been. He'd been a fool to think that Amanda would want to talk to him, would want anything to do with him. She had been right about his reputation. Most of the girls he'd slept with, he didn't even remember their names, or anything about them. Why would Amanda think that it would be any different with her?

He drove around for a while, looking at the old, familiar sights of the town he'd grown up in. He drove past the IHOP where he'd worked as a busboy one summer in high school, and past the school's football field where he'd attracted the attention of recruiters and made a name for himself. Those days were long since past, however, and he knew this town was no longer a part of his life.

After driving in circles for a while, he found himself not far from the diner where Amanda worked. He thought about going back inside to apologize to her, to try to explain himself. But he couldn't think what to say.

He was about to drive on past the place and head home, when he spotted Amanda walking down the street. He slowed down as he approached her, wondering why she'd be walking home in the middle of the night. He had assumed she had a car; it hadn't occurred to him until he saw her walking that her restaurant job probably didn't pay her enough to afford one.

He pulled alongside the curb next to her and rolled down the window. “Hey, Amanda.”

She looked at him, an irritated scowl on her face. “Go away, Cole.”

“Amanda, don't be like that. Come on, let me give you a ride.”

“I'm fine,” she said. She pulled her jacket tighter around herself. “Why don't you just head along home? I'm sure the big welcoming party must still be going. You guys used to party all night, didn't you?”

“I'm not in college anymore,” Cole said. Sure, he and his friends used to stay up until all hours of the night, drinking and partying. But being in a professional football team was different. He had to keep himself fit, and early morning training sessions weren't easy to keep up with when you were hung over.

“Come on,” he said, “it's freezing out there. And it looks like it's going to rain.” He peered through the windshield up and the cloudy night sky. There wasn't a single star in sight.

Amanda stopped walking and looked up at the sky. Cole stopped the car right next to her. He leaned across and opened the door for her. “Please?” he said. “I owe you at least a ride home.”

Amanda looked down the street, then let out a long, frustrated sigh. She got in and pulled the door closed, then crossed her arms and turned away from him. “I live on Chestnut Lane,” she said.

Cole started driving, heading in that direction. He remembered it being in the poorer neighborhood. When they got into the right area, he saw that a lot of the houses were rundown, with peeling paint and the shutters hanging off the front of some houses. At one point they passed a couple of guys standing on a street corner, hunched over and talking quietly to each other. They shot suspicious glares at the car as they drove past, then went back to whatever illicit business they were up to in the middle of the night.

Amanda was quiet for most of the drive. She stared out the window, not even looking at Cole. He kept glancing her way, trying to think of something to say, but his mind was blank.

They pulled into her apartment complex. The buildings were badly in need of repair, and the lawn out front was patchy and filled with weeds. Cole looked through the window at the building, trying to find the right apartment, but half the numbers had fallen off the doors.

“Right here's fine,” Amanda said, her voice a bare whisper.

Cole stopped the car and sat there, watching Amanda. It had started to rain, and the only sounds were the rumbling of the engine, the light splattering of raindrops on the car, and the squeak of the windshield wipers.

Amanda reached for the door handle. Cole reached over and took her other hand. “Hey.”

She froze, looking at him out of the corner of her eye. “I need to go upstairs,” she said. “I have to pick up my son.”

He let go of her hand. He'd forgotten that she had a kid. He wondered what the situation was with the kid's father, if he was still around. “Can I come up, and we can talk?” he asked. “Just talk.”

“We don't have anything to talk about.” She got out and slammed the door shut. He watched her walk through the rain and into the apartment. He sat there staring at the building until he saw a light on the third floor turn on. He gazed up at the window, hoping to catch another glimpse of her. But a minute later the light turned out.

Cole sighed and shifted the car into gear. He'd been a fool to think he could become a part of her life again. He drove home through the rain, trying to banished thoughts of Amanda from his mind. But seeing her again, after so many years, had stirred something up inside of him. He couldn't stop thinking about her, no matter how hard he tried.

Chapter 7

Early Saturday morning, Amanda had a shift at her second job, running a cash register at a local supermarket. It was grueling to be there so early in the morning after working a double the night before, but she didn't have much choice in the matter if she wanted to keep up with her bills. She was consoled by the one perk her second job had: she had a stool behind the register, so she could sit instead of being on her feet all day. It was a small benefit, but with how bad her feet were still hurting, it was a blessing.

Her shift finished at noon, leaving her with the rest of the day ahead of her. She wanted to go home and spend some time with her son, since she had barely seen him over the last few days. But before going home, she felt like there was another stop she needed to make. After her encounter with Cole the night before, she felt like she needed to go talk to Michelle about the wedding.

She took a bus to Michelle's parents' house, where Michelle and Blake were staying for the weekend. She had rarely been to the new house since they moved to the wealthier part of town. It was the sort of neighborhood where Amanda felt completely out of place. All of the houses were huge—not quite mansions, but close to it—and every driveway had a BMW or a Mercedes or some other fancy luxury car. Most of the people who lived in that area were doctors, lawyers, or finance professionals. Michelle's family stood out as not belonging there in the least. Her dad was equipment manager for the high school football team, and her mom was a nurse. They could never have afforded such a nice house on their salaries. Though from what Amanda understood, Cole had paid for it all.

Michelle's mom greeted her at the door and led her inside. She found Michelle in the living room, going over last-minute wedding plans. She set aside a catalog when Amanda walked in, getting up and taking both of Amanda's hands in hers.

“Oh, thank God you're here,” Michelle said. “The florist is rushing to get all of the arrangements together at the last minute, but he's pushing me to decide on the bouquet. I can't decide if I want to go with something more traditional, or pick something a little more exotic.”

“Umm, okay,” Amanda said. She didn't know the first thing about flowers, but she let Michelle drag her over to the couch so they could sort through the catalogs. She offered the best advice she could, though it mostly involved her saying that the first choice looked nice and the second choice looked nice and the third choice looked...nice as well. Michelle didn't even seem to notice her noncommittal answers, picking out whatever she liked regardless of what Amanda said.

“Listen,” Amanda said when there was a brief pause in all the talk about flowers. “I needed to talk to you. About the wedding.”

“Why?” Michelle asked. “Is something wrong? Please don't tell me there's something wrong. You have no idea what I've gone through planning this thing on such short notice.”

“No, it's not like that.” Amanda squirmed in her seat, not sure how to bring the delicate subject up. “It's about—”

“Cole!”

“Yes, how did you....?”

Amanda trailed off when she saw that Michelle was looking across the room at Cole. He walked in carrying a case of wine. “Hey, sis,” he said, setting the case down on the table. “They only had one case of the Zinfandel left, so I picked up a couple of cases of this rosé stuff. They said it tastes the same. I've got the rest out in the car.”

Michelle went over to check on the wine, frowning as she read the label. Cole smiled awkwardly at Amanda and gave her a small wave. “Hey,” he said.

“Hey,” Amanda said. She tried to avoid making eye contact. She had come here to talk about Cole, not to talk to him. She wasn't sure how to bring up the situation with him there in the room.

“I need to call the distributor,” Michelle said, pulling out her phone. “They promised me they had four cases set aside for me.”

She stepped out of the room to make the call, leaving Cole and Amanda alone together. Cole stood there with his hands in his back pockets, looking like he wanted to talk. Amanda sighed. “Thanks for the ride home,” she said.

“Yeah, no problem.” Cole sat down on the chair across from her. “I'm always happy to help out a friend, you know that.”

“Are we friends?” Amanda frowned at him.

“Well, yeah.” Cole shrugged. “I mean, I used to give you and Michelle rides all the time, back when you two were in high school together. It's no big deal.”

Amanda shrugged and looked away.

Cole leaned forward. “Listen...you know I wanted to call you, right? I mean, I asked Michelle for your number. But she...”

Amanda nodded, still not meeting his eyes. “She told me.” She still wasn't sure how to feel about the knowledge that Cole had actually tried to get back in touch with her. It made it harder for her to be mad at him.

“Look, maybe I can make it up to you,” Cole said.

“What do you mean?”

He reached over and took her hands in his. “Let me be your date to the wedding.”

She started to shake her head, a hesitant look on her face.

“No funny business,” Cole said, giving her a pleading smile. “I promise. I just think we owe it to each other to have the chance to catch up. Make up for what happened. Just like old times, right?”

Amanda thought about it, not sure what to say. She wasn't sure they had any “old times” to rekindle, really. She had just been a foolish teenager with a crush on her friend's older brother. The one night they'd shared together had been amazing, but it had still just been one night.

She looked into his eyes and was stunned by the thought that he looked just like James. She had seen the resemblance before, but it was something else to be sitting so close to Cole, looking right into his eyes, and realizing how much they were alike. It made her voice catch in her throat.

“Please?” Cole asked.

Amanda sighed and hung her head. “Yeah,” she said. “I guess. Sure.”

“Great,” Cole said, grinning. He got up, pacing excitedly around the room. “It'll be great. Just you wait and see.”

Amanda watched him, thinking of her son. Their son. Though she knew she could never let them meet. It would be too hard for her to bring Cole to meet his son, without telling him about their connection. It would break her heart.

And more than that, she was worried about the effect it would have on James. He had never yet asked her who his father was. He was too young to really think about that sort of thing. But she knew that one day, it was a conversation she was going to have to have with him.

It would be easier, she was sure, if she could tell him a story about some vague father figure that had never been a part of his life. She could tell him about her high school crush, and how she'd spent only one night with Cole. How Cole had never called her again after that night. That would be easier than letting James get to know Cole, letting them develop some kind of relationship together. It would be so much harder for James to accept that his father wasn't a part of his life if that father was someone he knew, someone he had developed some sort of bond with. She didn't want to put him through that.

Michelle returned a few minutes later, but Amanda couldn't sit around any longer. She'd come here to talk about how to avoid Cole at the wedding, and instead she'd somehow agreed to be his date. The whole situation was too confusing. She made her excuses and left, heading for the bus stop so she could head home to her son.

Chapter 8

A few hours after he'd seen Amanda, Cole headed out with some of his old college buddies. He was looking forward to having some time to catch up with his friends, instead of being hounded by people from around town who he barely knew. He hadn't seen some of his old college teammates since graduation. Most of them hadn't gone on to play professionally, and instead they'd moved on to living normal, simple lives. A couple of them were even married, and one or two had kids already. Cole couldn't imagine being a father at his age. He was only in his mid-twenties. Though when he thought about it, he realized that his parents had already had kids by his age. He couldn't get his head around that.

Cole sat at a table with half a dozen of his old teammates. They had a few pitchers of beer, and some nice greasy cheesesteaks, and they were telling stories about the glory days. Cole made sure to push the conversation away from his own recent success; he'd had enough over the last couple of days of people raving about his football fame. Whenever one of his friends asked about his time in the NFL, he made his answers as brief as possible, then quickly responded with a question about how their lives were doing. He learned that one of his friends had become an accountant, another a bank manager. One was still working as a cook in the same restaurant he'd been in during college. And while their mundane jobs sounded boring, Cole felt a bit of jealousy at the simplicity of their lives. Especially when the conversation came around to their romantic lives.

“Yeah, we'll be coming up on our third wedding anniversary this May,” one of his friends said. “I gotta tell ya, I never thought I'd be married. But you know how it is, when you find 'the one.'”

A few of the guys shouted teasing taunts at him, throwing pretzels and booing. “Aww, come on, man,” another of Cole's friends said. “No one wants to hear about you settling down with two-point-three kids and a dog. Now, my man Cole, I bet he's just rolling in pussy, am I right?”

The guys grinned. Cole felt his face heating up. He shook his head, staring into his beer. “Hey, guys, being a playboy isn't all it's cracked up to be. I wouldn't mind settling down and finding the right girl.”

“Oh, come on. You're really telling me you'd give up all the free pussy that lines up after every game.”

Cole shrugged and looked away. “I'm just saying, maybe there's something more to life than that. Something more satisfying.” His thoughts drifted to Amanda. He knew he was probably being foolish, pinning all of his hopes and emotions on a girl he'd barely known since his college days. But she was on his mind more and more, especially after he'd finally seen her in person again.

“Well don't look now, Cole, buddy boy, but there's a couple of hotties looking your way.”

His friend nodded towards the bar. Cole glanced over and saw a couple of hot young girls standing there, sipping at some fruity drink concoctions and giving him the eye. They looked too young to even be in the bar, probably a couple of eighteen or nineteen year olds sporting a pair of fake IDs. When they saw him looking, they leaned together and whispered. They giggled, then crossed the bar and came over to his table.

“Hey,” one girl said. She had bleached blonde hair and she was wearing a top that barely held her in.

“You're Cole Lockheed, right?” the other asked. She had short, dark hair and a sultry look.

“Yeah,” Cole said, avoiding eye contact with either of them. “Sorry, I'm not doing autographs or anything. Just here to have drinks with my buddies.”

“We don't want autographs,” the blonde said, smiling at her friend. “We were just wondering if we could join you.”

“Absolutely,” one of Cole's friends said. He pulled a chair over for one of the girls, and one of the other guys grabbed a chair for the other one. They sat down and the guys ordered them a round of drinks. Cole sighed and looked down into his beer, feeling like he'd rather be anywhere but here.

What he really wanted was to be with Amanda.

When he got tired of evading the girls' advances, Cole made his excuses and left. He knew he could have ended up getting laid back there, quite possibly in a threesome. But the meaningless sex just didn't interest him now. Well, he'd be lying to himself if he said he wasn't tempted. The girls had been hot, and more than willing. But the only appeal they had was physical, and he wanted something more.

He got into his rental car and started driving. He was drunk enough to know that he shouldn't have been driving, but he was also too drunk to care. He didn't feel like having one of his buddies drive him home, and he didn't want to call a cab.

He drove slowly through the back streets of the town, stopping a couple of times when he felt too dizzy to keep going. At one point a cop car passed him, but he managed to keep the car going straight and steady until the cop passed him by. He let out a long, slow breath, and a voice in the back of his head told him he needed to pull over and walk the rest of the way home.

He stopped the car and got out, then looked around blearily. He realized he had been driving in the wrong direction. He wasn't anywhere near his parents' house.

But he was pretty close to Amanda's.

He started walking towards her apartment, without letting himself think it through. By the time he stood in front of the apartment door, it was already too late to turn back. He jabbed the doorbell over and over again, peering through the glass door into the stairwell. He didn't know which apartment was hers, so he rang every doorbell for all three floors.

A minute later, one of the ground floor doors opened. An angry man in a bathrobe and pajamas came out, putting on his glasses. “Do you know what time it is?” he shouted through the door. He eyed Cole suspiciously, but he didn't open the door.

“I'm looking for Amanda,” Cole said, leaning close to the glass. “Is she there?”

Another neighbor opened her door and peeked out, asking the other man what was going on. Their voices were muted through the stairwell door, but Cole could hear the anger in their tones.

“Look, I'm just looking for Amanda!” he shouted. “Can you please let me in?”

Footsteps sounded from the stairwell above, and a moment later, Amanda appeared. She was dressed in pajama pants and a tank top, and her feet were bare. She peered through the glass door at him. “Cole?”

She opened the door and let Cole in, while her neighbors angrily asked her what this was all about and if she had any idea what time it was.

“I'm sorry, Mr. Johnson,” she said. “I'm sure he didn't mean to wake everyone up.”

Mr. Johnson tugged his bathrobe belt tighter, his jaw set in a stern glower. “You should think more carefully about the company you keep, young lady.”

Amanda rolled her eyes at him. He turned and went back into his apartment, as did the other annoyed neighbor. Amanda crossed her arms, staring Cole down, and angrily whispered, “Cole, what are you doing here? It's after midnight.”

“I wanted to see you,” Cole said. He felt foolish, but he wasn't quite thinking straight. When it started to settle in what an ass he was making of himself, he turned towards the door. “I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bother you. I'll go.”

Amanda grabbed his arm. “Wait. Cole, did you drive here?”

“My car is...” Cole gestured vaguely with one hand, pointing first in one direction, then the other. “I'm not sure.”

Amanda rubbed her hands over her face. “God...you're such a pain. You can't drive like this.”

She looked at him with a thoughtful frown. Then she sighed and said, “Come upstairs. You can sleep on the couch.”

A smile spread across his face.

“But no funny business,” she said.

“I promise,” he said. And he meant it. As much as he was attracted to Amanda, and as much as he knew he'd be more than willing right now, he knew he couldn't put the moves on her in this state. It would ruin whatever chances he had with her. If showing up on her doorstep drunk hadn't already ruined it.

She led him upstairs. The apartment was dark, and the living room was littered with children's toys, junk mail, and empty soda cans. Amanda steered him over to the couch and sat him down.

“You need to be gone first thing in the morning,” Amanda said. “I don't really want to have to explain to my son why there's a strange man sleeping on the couch.”

“I'll leave as soon as I sober up,” Cole said. “I promise.”

He was vaguely aware of Amanda helping him lie down and take his shoes off. She covered him with a blanket and he started to drift off. In the darkness and through his blurry vision, he thought he saw her standing over him for a minute, looking down at him. But the next thing he knew, he had passed out.

Chapter 9

Amanda watched Cole for a while as he drifted off to sleep. Now that he was resting, and he wasn't trying to flirt with her or act all macho, he actually looked pretty cute. Almost vulnerable.

She still couldn't believe that he had come down here, drunk, in the middle of the night. She wanted to be mad at him, but it was almost sweet, in a pathetic kind of way. Sure, what he'd done had been immature and irresponsible. But in the moment when all of his inhibitions were gone, what he'd wanted most was to come and see her. She supposed he could have had any other girl he wanted. He could have gone down to some bar and picked up the first bimbo that recognized him from TV. But he'd come to her instead.

She adjusted the blanket over him, then took his shoes and set them by the door. She went to go check on James. He was asleep in his little bed, clutching at his Nerf football. He held onto that thing more than a teddy bear.

It was so tempting to tell James that his father was in the other room. That after so many years, they finally had the chance to meet. But she didn't think she could take that chance. Cole would be leaving in a few days, and for all she knew, he'd cut off all contact with James even if she told him about their relationship. She didn't want to risk James's poor little heart like that.

She went to bed, her thoughts still swirling. She dreamed of a different life, one where they were a proper family. Mom and Dad married, raising a son together, living a simple, carefree life. One where she didn't have to work two jobs just to support herself. One where she didn't have to skip meals at home so she could save money by eating at the diner.

Amanda woke back up in the early hours of the morning. She normally worked a morning shift at the diner on Sunday, and her body was so used to being up at six a.m. that she found herself wide awake even without an alarm.

She got up and heard movement from somewhere in the apartment. She went down the hall and found Cole in the bathroom, washing his face and combing his hair.

“Hey,” he said, giving her a tired smile.

“Hey. How are you feeling?”

“Better,” he said. “Still a little woozy. Listen, I'm sorry about—”

“Don't worry about it,” Amanda said. She leaned against the door frame. “I get it. I mean, I've done my fair share of dumb things while I was drunk.”

He blushed and turned away. She wondered if he thought she was talking about the night of the party, when they'd slept together.

Her lips twisted in a grimace. She didn't know what else to say. So she opened the medicine cabinet and pulled out a spare toothbrush. She'd bought a four-pack last time she'd gone shopping, since it had been on sale. “Here,” she said, handing it to Cole. “Make yourself at home. I'm going to put on some coffee.”

By the time she finished brewing the coffee, Cole emerged from the bathroom, looking much more put together. She handed him a cup and they went into the living room and sat on the couch together. There was a long, awkward silence, and Amanda didn't have the first clue how to fill it.

Finally, Cole said, “So, the wedding is this afternoon.”

“Yeah.” Amanda checked the time. They had less than twelve hours before the ceremony. “I still can't believe Michelle is getting married. And to a Hollywood producer, even.”

“I know, crazy, right?” Cole chuckled and shook his head. “I still remember when she had a crush on Bobby Stevens.”

“Oh God. Bobby. I forgot all about him.” Amanda smiled, thinking back to her high school days. Michelle's crush on Bobby had been almost as big as Amanda's crush on Cole. “What ever happened to him?”

“I heard he got married.”

“Oh? Well, I hope he and his wife are happy together.”

“Husband, actually,” Cole said.

Amanda's eyes went wide. “Oh.” She sipped at her coffee. She wondered if Michelle knew.

“Do you ever miss the old days?” Cole asked.

Amanda leaned back on the couch, staring at the ceiling. “Sometimes, I guess. I mean, I certainly liked it better when I wasn't working all the time. But I wouldn't trade James for anything in the world.”

Cole looked down the hall, towards James's room. “Who's the father?”

Amanda stared at Cole. He caught her staring and looked her right in the eye. She quickly turned away.

“It doesn't matter,” she said. “He's not around.”

“When's his birthday?”

Amanda frowned. “Why?”

Cole shrugged. “I dunno. Maybe I could send him something. Does he have a bike? He's almost getting old enough to start on training wheels.”

“He's four.” Amanda shook her head.

“I was on training wheels when I was five, I think. And riding a two-wheeler by six.”

Amanda thought it over. James was pretty coordinated. He must have gotten that from his father.

The conversation lapsed for a few minutes. Cole finished his coffee and set it on the table. “So,” he asked, “when should I pick you up tonight?”

“Pick me up?” Amanda asked.

“Yeah. For the wedding? You're still going with me, aren't you?”

“Oh.” She shrugged, looking into her empty cup. “Yeah. I just figured we'd meet up there, or whatever.”

He studied her for a long moment, a sad look in his eyes. “Listen,” he said, “if you aren't interested, I don't want you to feel pressured or anything.”

“It's not that.”

“Then what is it?”

Amanda looked down the hall again, towards James's room. How could she explain to Cole everything she was feeling? All of the conflicted emotions, all of the memories, and all of her worries about the future. It was all too much to handle. She couldn't put it all into words.

The weight of it all started pressing down on her. The more she tried to find a way to explain things to Cole, the harder it was to speak. She felt her chest start to tighten. She choked back a sob. Before she knew it, tears were flowing down her cheeks.

Cole moved closer to her, wrapping his arms around her. She buried her face against his neck. He held her tight, and his strong arms made her feel safe and protected. It made it so much easier to let it all go. She cried harder than she had in years, all of her frustrations finally coming out. She clung to him desperately, wishing things could be easier. Wishing it were as simple as rekindling her old crush and starting all over again.

Cole pulled back and brushed his thumb across her cheek, wiping her tears away. She looked up into his eyes. He looked into hers, holding her while she trembled.

Then he kissed her.

She knew it was probably a mistake. A small part of her wanted to hold back, to stop. But it felt so safe and warm in his arms, and she hadn't been touched by a man in such a long time. There had hardly been any men after Cole. She had never been able to really trust another man, never been able to let him inside. And then there was her son to consider, and she couldn't just jump into bed with any man without considering how it might affect James. But this was James's father, for better or worse.

Cole leaned forward, pressing her down onto the couch. His weight on top of her felt solid and real, real in a way she hadn't known in a long time. His hands started roaming her body. She was tense at first, afraid he would judge her, that he wouldn't find her attractive. She wasn't the thin, fit girl she'd once been. She was scared that he would be disgusted to find how much her body had changed, after the toil of childbirth and the troubles of her life since then.

But he caressed her ample curves with pleasing sounds coming from his throat. He pressed himself down on top of her, and she could feel him growing hard through his pants. His hands slid along her sides, teasing her sensitive skin. Then he started to push up her tank top, exposing her full, firm breasts.

She tensed up, part of her mind screaming at her to stop. James was in the other room. He might hear them, might walk in on them. She wasn't ready to have that conversation with him. Not by a long shot.

But when Cole started touching her breasts, his hands felt so strong and warm. She couldn't push him away, couldn't tell him to stop.

She reached down and started pushing off her pajama pants. Cole grabbed them and pulled them the rest of the way off, exposing her body to him. He had his own pants off a moment later. He laid his body on top of hers, spreading her legs with his knees. She felt his hardness rubbing against her, and despite her reservations, despite her fears, she ached for it. She needed it. It had been such a long time, and she couldn't stand to make him stop.

She shifted herself to make it easier for him, and within a moment, Cole was inside of her. She gasped and clung to him, holding him close. He grunted in pleasure and started thrusting inside of her, holding her ample hips in his strong hands. She wrapped her legs around him and pulled him tighter with each thrust, biting her lip to hold back her moans.

As the ecstasy built inside of her, she knew this was something different than the first night they'd shared together, over five years ago. That night had been a drunken mess, and her virginal movements had been awkward and full of fumbles. She had been full of nerves and alcohol, and unable to do anything but let Cole have his drunken way with her. But this time it was something so much more. Even in his eagerness, Cole moved with a tender touch. He held her close, their cheeks pressed together, his warm breath caressing her ear. She felt his need with each movement of his hips, and it felt like so much more than just a physical urge. He wanted her, needed her, and helping him fulfill that need filled her with a warmth and pleasure that went beyond the burning in her loins.

She clung tightly to him until the waves of euphoria washed over both of them, then they laid there on the couch, panting and covered in sweat. He held her even tighter after it was done, as if he were afraid that she would disappear, that she would leave him for another five years.

Eventually, she pulled herself from his arms. She wrapped a blanket around herself and got up, feeling awkward in the aftermath. Cole laid on the couch in a daze, looking like he was still woozy from his drinking the night before, combined with the exertion of sex. She looked down at him for a moment, the reality of what had just happened slowly settling in on her.

When Cole passed back out again, she laid the blanket back over him, then headed for the bathroom and climbed into the shower. The smell of sex covered her, and she didn't want that to be the first thing James noticed when she woke him up for breakfast.

Though as the hot water poured down over her, she found herself faced with the reality that she would have to tell her son something. What had just happened meant that Cole's presence there was more than just a friend stopping by for the night. She didn't know what exactly it meant, but she knew that it wasn't something she could simply brush off and ignore. She owed her son, and Cole, better than that.

Chapter 10

Cole woke up a few minutes after Amanda got in the shower. He looked around blearily at the unfamiliar living room. He was laying naked on the couch, covered by a blanket. Faint traces of morning sunlight shone through the sliding glass door that led out onto the balcony.

And there was a small child standing in the middle of the room, staring at him.

“Hi,” the kid said.

Cole sat up, pulling the blanket over himself to make sure he was covered. “Hey.”

“Who are you?”

“I'm Cole.” He gave the kid an awkward little wave.

The kid continued staring at him, clutching a Nerf football to his chest. “Are you a friend of my mom's?”

“Yeah,” Cole said. “Yeah, something like that.”

“Oh.” The kid looked around the room awkwardly. “Do you want to watch TV with me?”

“Sure.” Cole grabbed his pants off the floor while the kid grabbed the remote and turned the TV on. He pulled his pants on under the cover of the blanket so as not to flash Amanda's son. He didn't want to have any awkward conversations about just what he and the kid's mother had been doing on the couch.

He expected the kid to turn on cartoons, but instead he put on ESPN. There was a game later in the day, but for now the station was playing the early morning edition of SportsCenter. Cole finished getting dressed while the kid watched the sports commentary and the theories about how today's games would go. Cole's team wasn't playing until Monday night; he had an early morning plane ticket to fly back tomorrow morning, giving him enough time to sleep off any hangover he might get at the wedding tonight.

“You're James, right?” Cole asked. He was pretty sure that was the kid's name, though they'd never met before.

“Yeah.” James kept his eyes on the TV, mostly ignoring Cole.

“You like football?”

“Yeah.”

“What's your favorite team?” Cole slid off the couch and sat on the floor next to the kid.

“The Eagles.”

Cole made a face. Philadelphia hadn't been one of his favorite teams even before he joined the NFL. Though for a kid living in South Jersey, it was the home team.

“That's cool,” Cole said. “Think they're going to win the Superbowl this year?” Cole knew that wasn't likely to happen. Philadelphia had only been to a few Superbowls in its entire history. But there was nothing wrong with being polite if it was the kid's favorite team.

“I dunno,” James said. “I guess.”

They chatted for a little while about football, not that the kid had the greatest insight into the game. He said his favorite part was when they kicked the ball, and that he didn't like it when the guys in the striped shirts made everyone stop playing. Cole wasn't too fond of the constant interruptions by the refs himself, though it was a bit different when you were the one on the field, staring at a yellow flag.

“So how old are you, anyway?” Cole asked. He couldn't remember if Amanda had told him.

“Four. I'm gonna be five in March.”

Cole leaned back on his hands, thinking that over. Four, going on five. His one night with Amanda, before this morning anyway, had been five and a half years ago. And it had been in June, at Amanda and Michelle's high school graduation party. And he didn't remember using a condom.

He counted the months, doing the math on his fingers. It added up right.

Damn, he thought.

He looked the kid over again. He had a strong jawline, like Cole and his father. Blue eyes, just like Cole. He couldn't really be sure. It might have just been a coincidence. For all he knew, Amanda had been with another guy not long after their encounter together. It was possible someone else was the father.

But now that the idea had occurred to him, it appeared to be the case more and more likely. He couldn't believe it had never occurred to him before. But it wasn't like he'd expected to come home after five years and find out there was a kid he'd never known about.

Amanda returned from her shower while he was thinking things over. She was dressed in sweat pants and a t-shirt, and the clothes hugged the curves of her body in ways that gave him ideas. Ideas that he most definitely couldn't act on with her son in the room. With his son, maybe?

He looked up at her. She met his eyes, and there was something in her gaze that set him on edge. Something about the way she looked at him, and at James. Was she hiding the truth from him? And if she was, why hadn't she ever told him?

Because he'd walked out on her the morning after they'd slept together. He couldn't blame her, if that was the reason. If he'd ever called her, ever gotten back in touch with her, then maybe she would have had reason to tell him the truth. But she must have felt abandoned. Alone. Stuck with the consequences of that night, and with no one to support her.

He looked away, unable to meet her gaze any longer. He looked around the messy apartment, with its secondhand furniture and its worn out carpets. She had to live like this because of him. Because he hadn't taken responsibility for his actions. It didn't matter that he hadn't known. He knew it was still his fault.

“Do you want to stay for breakfast?” Amanda asked. Her voice was tense, but she seemed to be trying to hide it. “I was going to make french toast.”

“Yeah,” Cole said. “That sounds good.”

“Yeah!” James said, thrusting his fists into the air. “French toast!”

Cole went into the kitchen to help out. He and Amanda moved awkwardly around each other, blushing every time they bumped elbows. Cole found the plates and silverware with a little direction from Amanda, then he cleared the old magazines and junk mail off the table to make room. It felt strange for him to be this...domestic. Strange, but good. After the initial awkwardness passed, he and Amanda found a comfortable silence. He tried to imagine doing this every morning. Waking up together, making breakfast together, and spending time together as a family. When he was a kid, he used to love when his family shared meals together. Though by his teenage years he had grown out of that, and he would mostly eat in his room. He'd developed a habit of eating alone in the years since then as well, so much so that he rarely took the girls he dated—or slept with, rather—out to dinner. Usually it was drinks, then heading back to his place or to a hotel room for a romp under the sheets.

Maybe this was what he'd been missing. The simple peace of shared family time.

“You hungry, kid?” Cole asked when Amanda started serving the French toast slices.

“Yeah,” James said. He climbed into a chair. When Amanda set a plate of French toast in front of James, he looked up at Cole and asked, “Can you cut it for me?”

Cole exchanged a look with Amanda. A slight smile played across her lips.

“Yeah, sure thing,” Cole said. He sat next to James and cut up his French toast, then added some syrup.

“You forgot the butter,” James protested, a serious look on his face.

“Oh. Sorry.” Cole opened the tub of butter and spread some on the French toast. He had a bit of trouble spreading it, since the bread was already cut up. Amanda watched him struggling with it, and she giggled. Cole blushed and smiled at her.

After breakfast was over, Cole got up and walked towards the door. “I should really get going,” he said. “I need to shower and get changed. My fancy clothes are back at home.”

“Yeah,” Amanda said. She kept her head down, not meeting his eyes. “Okay.”

“Did you still just want to meet there?” Cole asked. “I mean… I'd be happy to come pick you up.”

Amanda turned and looked at her son, probably thinking about what a pain it would be to catch a bus with him to get to the church. She shrugged and gave Cole a small smile. “If you want to come by, that'd be fine.”

“Great.” He smiled at her. She finally met his eyes. He stepped closer, leaning in for a kiss, but she pulled away, looking at James.

“I'll see you then,” Amanda said.

Cole looked at James, wondering how much a kid that age understood about adult relationships and all of the complications that came with them. He supposed it was for the best if he didn't give the kid any reason to ask his mother awkward questions. “See you then,” he said, before he headed out the door.

During the walk back to where he'd parked his car, all he could think about was Amanda and James. He was almost certain that the kid had to be his. It all added up.

He just didn't know what he was supposed to do about it.

He was so preoccupied with his thoughts that be barely noticed the parking ticket on his car for parking too close to a fire hydrant. He pulled the ticket off the car and stuck it in his pocket. Considering everything that last night and this morning had brought about, it was worth far more than the cost of a parking ticket.

Chapter 11

Amanda took her time getting ready for the wedding. Michelle had sent over her bridesmaid dress the night before. It was emerald green, and fairly hideous, which seemed to be the norm for bridesmaid dresses. It didn't fit too well either, which was to be expected with how rushed the entire wedding was. There had been no time to go to a dress fitting or to get adjustments made. She had just given Michelle her sizes and hoped for the best.

Once she finally got herself into the dress, she looked herself over in the mirror. The dress was tight, hugging her curves a bit more than she was comfortable with, and the top pushed her breasts up so much she was afraid she was going to fall out of it. Though she supposed that Cole would like that.

When she thought of Cole, she had to stop and sit down on the bed. She still couldn't believe that she had slept with him again. Or that he'd spent the morning with her and James, having breakfast together like a normal family. It was something she'd thought about many times over the years. It was something she thought she could get used to.

She went to fetch James and get him ready for the wedding. She didn't have a suit or any fancy clothes for him; there was no way she could afford to spend so much money on a suit that he would grow out of in a few months anyway. So she simply dressed him in his nicest corduroy pants and a plain black shirt. He would probably end up getting cake all over it before the end of the night, but that was okay. She'd grown used to living a life filled with stained clothes.

“Okay, sweetie,” she said as she adjusted his shirt. “Cole is going to come by soon to pick us up, then we're going to go see your Aunt Michelle get married.”

“Is Cole your boyfriend?” James asked.

Amanda fell backwards until she was sitting on the floor. She didn't know how to answer that question, especially in a way that a four year old would understand. “I'm not sure. What do you think of him?”

“He's okay,” James said with a serious nod.

“Just okay?”

James shrugged. “We watched Sports Center together.”

“Yeah, I saw. Did you know that Cole plays football? You saw him on TV the other day.”

“I did?” James's face scrunched up in concentration. He probably hadn't recognized Cole out of his uniform.

“Yup, that's right. He's a quarterback.”

“That's so cool! Do you think he could teach me how to play?”

Amanda smiled. James had wanted to learn to play football almost since he'd first learned how to talk. Amanda didn't really know the rules, so she hadn't been able to teach him anything, though she took him outside to toss the ball around whenever she could. “I think maybe he'd like that,” she said. “But you know, he probably has to go home after the wedding. He can't stay here if he's going to go be on TV playing football.”

“Will he come back?”

She stroked her son's hair, feeling a bit misty-eyed. “I don't know, sweetie. But maybe he will.”

“I hope so.” James bit his lip, a thoughtful look on his face.

Amanda caressed his cheek. “Me too, sweetie. Me too.”

She let James go off to watch TV while they waited for Cole to arrive. Amanda lingered in her room, her thoughts on the past. She dug through her closet until she found one of her old photo albums. It had been a long time since she took actual photographs, instead of taking digital snapshots with her phone. But she had a collection of pictures from back in high school, many of them taken by Michelle's mother. She used to take pictures all the time, whenever Amanda and Michelle were hanging out, and she had always made duplicates of the picture to give to Amanda.

She flipped through the pages, and she was surprised to see how often Cole was in the pictures. Sitting next to her on the couch while she mooned over him. In the pool at Michelle's house, splashing her playfully. She'd longed for him so much back then. He had always seemed like the perfect guy. Handsome, athletic, fun to be around. It had crushed her when the reality of the situation set in and she realized he wasn't any different from any other guy. Even Michelle's admission that she had told Cole not to call didn't help take away that heartache.

She looked at one of the last pictures in the album. It had been taken the night of her high school prom. She and Michelle were there in their fancy, expensive dresses. Amanda had gone to the prom with Conner Williams. He had been a nerdy boy with braces, and she hadn't really liked him that much. But when he'd asked her to prom, she hadn't had anyone else to go with, so she'd said yes. But she had really wished she could have gone with Cole.

He was there in the picture, standing in the background, looking out of place in jeans and a t-shirt when the prom-goers were all dressed up. She remembered wishing that Conner would cancel. She had imagined being there at Michelle's house, crying because she had been stood up. Then, in her fantasy, Cole would have put on his father's tuxedo and escorted her to the prom. It would have been magical. At least, in her imagination.

But instead of sweeping her off her feet in a romantic gesture, he had fucked her at the graduation party and left her alone the next morning. Romance was never what it seemed to be in real life.

The doorbell rang. Amanda set the photo album aside. She was filled with more doubts now than she had been before. Seeing Cole again had made her feel like she was in high school all over again, but her high school crush had been nothing but a fantasy. And the reality was that Cole was a man with a reputation. A man who would be flying home after the wedding, leaving her and her son alone once again. She wouldn't let herself forget that again.

She picked up James and carried him downstairs. Cole was waiting at the door, looking rather nice in an expensive suit. He flashed a smile at her when she came outside, but she refused to let herself swoon over him.

“Hey,” he said, grinning wide. “You ready?”

“Yeah,” she said, keeping a neutral tone. “Yeah, I'm ready.”

They got into the car and headed to the wedding, and to what Amanda was sure would be the last time she ever saw Cole.

Chapter 12

Cole tried to strike up some conversation with Amanda on the ride over to the church, but she was oddly quiet. He wasn't sure what was wrong, or if he had done something wrong. When he'd left her this morning, they had been in a good place. Or at least he had thought. But now she seemed distant. As if she didn't want to be around him.

He told himself that it was his imagination. They had chemistry. He knew they did. This morning had proven that. Not just because they'd had sex. But because of how they'd spent time together, like a real family. He was sure that connection was there. He just needed to find a way to strengthen it. To make sure that Amanda saw what he saw. That they belonged together.

When they got to the church, he tried to hold her hand, but she had her arms full holding James. He would have asked her to sit with him during the ceremony, but she was a bridesmaid, and her place was up by the altar with Michelle. Blake had brought friends of his to be his groomsmen, so Cole didn't have a part in the ceremony. He ended up sitting in the front row, alongside his parents. And while his mother cried and the rest of the church's eyes were on Michelle, Cole's eyes were on Amanda. She looked beautiful, standing up there. He started to imagine her as the one in a white dress. Standing in front of a priest with him. Making their vows to each other.

He shook those thoughts off. They were foolish, he knew. Even if things started to work out between them, they were a long way off from thinking about marriage. But still, it was easy to imagine it. And it felt good.

The ceremony itself was fairly quick and simple. When it was done, Cole drove Amanda and James over to the rented hall where the reception was being held. There was plenty of food, and an open bar. Cole didn't intend to drink too much, but when Amanda continued ignoring him as the night went on, he found himself drinking more and more. By the time he stopped to think about how many he'd had, he was already quite buzzed. Enough, at least, that he had the guts to press Amanda in order to find out what was wrong.

He scooted his chair next to hers and took her hand. She had been quiet for a while, watching James dance with a group of other young children off to one side of the dance floor. When he took her hand, she looked up at him, a hesitant expression on her face.

“Amanda,” he said, trying to sort out his thoughts through the haze of alcohol. “Did I do something wrong?”

She frowned thoughtfully, studying his face for a long moment. Then she reached out and touched his cheek. “No. No, Cole, you didn't do anything wrong.”

Her words almost consoled him, except that she turned back away from him, her shoulders hunched. “Something must be wrong,” he said. “I'm not stupid. I can tell.”

“Just forget about it.”

“Why?” He shifted his chair so she had to face him. She turned her face away, but he leaned forward and made her look at him. “Amanda, I know I haven't been a part of your life for a long time, but we made a connection this weekend. I know we did.”

“Life isn't all about romance and magic, Cole.” Amanda shook her head, a sad frown on her face.

“Who says it has to be?” he asked. “Why can't it just be about two people making a connection. Feeling something for each other.”

“Are you saying you feel something for me?” She frowned deeper, finally meeting his eyes.

“Yes.”

“How do I know you don't just want sex?”

“Because...” Cole sighed and shook his head. “I don't know. Because I'm telling you I do. Because I want something more.”

“And you really think that would work?” She shook her head. “You live on the other side of the country. You have your career. And I have my son.”

“Our son,” Cole said.

Amanda froze. Her face went pale. She licked her lips. “Cole...I...”

“You don't think I couldn't figure it out?” He leaned back in his chair, looking across the room at James. The little guy was having a great time, dancing up a storm. “I get why you never told me, I do. But it's different now.”

Amanda shook her head, wrapping her arms around herself. “No. It's not that simple.”

“Why can't it be?”

“Because it just isn't!”

She got up and stormed out of the room. Cole followed, catching up to her in the lobby. The music was quieter there, muted by the doors, and there was no one else around but the two of them.

“Do you expect me to believe you're really going to change, Cole?” Amanda asked, spreading her arms. “Am I supposed to believe that you'll stop sleeping around? That you'll take responsibility for your son? That you'll be there for him? You won't even be here tomorrow. What does that say about any kind of future we could have?”

“I can make a change,” Cole said. “Transfer to a different team. Maybe play for Philadelphia. I mean, I've got a contract, but I can find a way out of it.”

“And then what?” Amanda let out a wry laugh, shaking her head. “You want to play house? Pretend like we're a family? This isn't a game, Cole. I deserve better than that. James deserves better.”

“And I want to give it to you. To both of you.”

He stepped forward and placed his hands on her arms, looking into her eyes. “Amanda, I've had a lot of time to think these past few days. A lot of time to look at my life and realize all of the mistakes I've made. I made a lot of dumb choices. But there's been something missing in my life. Something missing for a long time. And I finally know what that is.”

“What?” Amanda asked, looking at him hesitantly.

“You.”

She slowly shook her head, tears welling in her eyes. “But how do I know...?”

“You never know,” Cole said. “Not for sure. No one ever does. But I want to try. That's all I'm asking you to do is try.”

He gestured through the glass doors into the main hall. “James deserves a chance at a better life. The kind of life I can help provide for him. With a father, with a real family. I know you've done the best you can, but I've seen how hard it's been. Let me have the chance to make it up to you. To make it up to him.”

“And what if it doesn't work,” Amanda asked, “and James ends up getting hurt in the long run?”

“I promise you that won't happen. Even if things don't work out between you and me, no matter what, I want to do right by James. Provide for him. Help you take care of him. I can afford to make sure he has everything he'll ever need. Clothes, food, the best toys. And a college fund.”

Amanda wiped the tears from her cheeks, a thoughtful expression on her face. “I do want to make sure he gets the chance to go to college. I don't want him to have to struggle the way I did.”

“Then let me help.” Cole took both of her hands in his. “Just let me try. Give me a chance.”

Amanda stepped closer. There was the light of hope in her eyes. “I'm not making any promises,” she said.

“I'm not asking for any.”

He pulled her close and pressed his lips against hers. She held herself stiff for a moment, then she melted into his arms. Her hands slipped around his neck and she leaned close to him, their bodies melding together. The tension melted away, and just for that moment, everything was perfect.

They went back in to join the rest of the party, and Amanda even danced a couple of slow dances with him. They talked a bit about how they were going to handle this new and uncertain relationship. He still had to fly back home for the Monday night game, and there were some training and practice sessions that he wouldn't be able to miss. But they made arrangements for him to fly back out next week, when he'd be able to take a few days off. And the week after that, his team was playing in New York, which would give him the chance to drive down and see Amanda and James while he was on the east coast.

At the end of the night, Cole drove Amanda and James back home. They went upstairs together and Amanda tucked James into the bed. They stepped out into the hall and Amanda shut James's door.

Cole slipped his arms around Amanda's waist.

She stepped away, pulling his hands off of her. “Not tonight.”

“Why not?”

“Because, I want to wait.”

“Wait for what?” Cole frowned in confusion.

“Until next week. Just...please? I want to wait.”

“All right.” Cole held back a sigh of frustration. He supposed she wanted to prove that their relationship was about something more than just sex. He could respect that.

She walked him to the door, where they shared a long and intimate kiss. Then he headed home, filled with sexual frustration, but also with hope for the future. He might be leaving her tonight, but he knew he would be back, and soon, everything would be the way it was supposed to be.

Chapter 13

Over the next few weeks, Amanda almost felt like she was in a real relationship. Cole was only in town a couple of days each week, but even if he couldn't be there for long, he flew out in order to spend time with her and James. Some nights, after they put James to bed, they made love long into the night. James even seemed to get used to the idea of Cole being there in the morning when he woke up.

Cole spoiled James each time he came to visit. He brought clothes, toys, and books. On the third visit, he brought James a bicycle. James was so excited that he made them take him outside right away so he could start learning to ride it. He wobbled a lot, but the training wheels helped him stay upright.

When James's birthday was approaching, Cole asked Amanda, “Can we do something for his birthday? I was thinking of a party at my parents' house.”

They were sitting in the kitchen, talking over a couple of cups of coffee. James was in the other room, reading some of his new storybooks. This was the first time Cole had asked about doing something with his family. And it made Amanda realize they were finally at a serious crossroads.

“You want to introduce him to your parents?” she asked.

“Well, yeah.” Cole shrugged. “I mean, they're his grandparents.”

“Right.” Amanda tapped her fingers against her coffee cup, thinking it over. She knew this was a step they needed to take if this relationship was ever going to work. It would be the big test. If Cole could really introduce James to his grandparents, it would mean he was really taking responsibility for his son. Making him a part of the family.

If they could do that, Amanda realized, it would mean that all of this was finally real. She wouldn't just be the girl Cole was sleeping with. He would be declaring to everyone that he was a father, and that would be the greatest gesture he could make.

“It sounds like a great idea,” she said.

They worked out all of the details, though before the party itself, Amanda insisted that they bring James to meet his grandparents first. Cole made arrangements for them to have lunch at his parents' house, and they drove down together one afternoon. Amanda made sure to dress James up in his best clothes, in order to make a good impression. Cole's parents had briefly met James at the wedding, but this was something different altogether.

Cole's parents greeted them warmly at the door. His mother gave Amanda a big hug, talking about how much she had grown up over the years. Aside from the wedding, Amanda hadn't seen them much since the days when she and Michelle used to hang out in high school.

They sat together in the living room, eating a simple lunch of sandwiches and finger food. They made small talk for a while, while Amanda tried to figure out how to bring up the subject they'd really come there to discuss.

“So,” Cole's mother said, “Michelle tells us that you two have been seeing a lot of each other lately.”

Amanda blushed and looked at Cole, meeting his eyes. She hadn't realized that Michelle had been talking about them to her parents. “Yeah,” Amanda said. “Things have been...going well.”

“I always liked you, Amanda,” Cole's mother said. “You're such a sweet girl. So down to earth. I think that's exactly what Cole needs.”

Amanda's blush deepened. “Well, thank you. I'm glad to hear it.”

Cole's father looked her up and down with a stern gaze. “I hate to be the sour grape in this conversation,” he said, “but I'm afraid I have to point out that I'm not sure it's appropriate for our son to be dating a woman who already has a child.”

“Dad,” Cole said, giving him a stern look.

His father held up a hand. “I'm not trying to make any accusations or anything. But it has to be said.” He looked at Amanda. “Cole makes quite a lot of money, I'm sure you know that. Now, I'm not saying you'd get involved with him just because of that, but I'm sure that it's crossed your mind that getting your hooks in someone like him would mean quite an easy life for you and your son.”

“Getting my 'hooks' in him?” Amanda scowled at him. “Excuse me, but I don't think—”

“Amanda,” Cole said, putting his hand on her knee.

She frowned at him, biting back her harsh words. She wanted to yell at his father, to tell him that he had no right to accuse her of something like that. Not after all the years she'd spent raising James alone, with no support from Cole or anyone in his family. But the look on Cole's face kept her quiet. These were his parents. It was his place to tell them.

“Mom,” Cole said. “Dad. There's something I need to tell you.”

“Oh God,” his dad said. His frown deepened.

Cole's mother just sat back on the couch, folding her hands in her lap.

Cole took a deep breath. He looked to Amanda. She smiled at him and put a hand on his knee.

“Amanda and I didn't just get together,” Cole said. “What I mean is, this isn't the first time we were together. Back when we were in school, there was a...well, I mean we...”

Cole's father turned and looked at James.

Amanda cleared her throat. “Cole and I spent a night together,” she said. “Five years ago.”

Cole's mother turned as well, looking at James. James sat off to the side, eating a sandwich and looking through one of his books. He didn't seem to be paying much attention to what the adults were talking about.

“Cole,” his father said. “Are you telling me what I think you're telling me?”

“Well,” Cole said. “Mom, Dad. You're...well, you're his grandparents.”

They looked at James again. He finally looked up from his book when he realized everyone was staring at him. “What?” he asked.

Cole's father scowled. His mother started to beam, covering her mouth with her hands. She got up and crossed the room, kneeling by James's chair and stroking his face. “Oh,” she said. “Oh my. My precious little angel.”

“Cole,” his father said. “Are you sure about this? I mean, we could have a paternity test done...”

“Dad, come on,” Cole said, rolling his eyes. “Believe me, I'm sure.”

“I wouldn't lie about this,” Amanda said. “If I had wanted to, I wouldn't have kept it secret for so many years. But I didn't want to be a burden.”

Cole's father rubbed his chin. He got up and started pacing around. “Well, if this is how it is. I mean, if you're sure, and you're sure this is what you want.”

Cole squeezed Amanda's knee, a wide smile on his face. “I'm sure, Dad.”

His father stood over Amanda, looking her up and down. “Well, then. I suppose I should welcome you to the family.”

Amanda smiled, feeling a warmth spreading in her chest. She got up and gave Cole's father a hug. Then she picked up James and explained to him that these were his grandparents.

They spent the rest of the day catching up. Cole's mother asked a million questions about James, wanting to know every little thing about his life. His father focused mostly on practical concerns: how was his health, and was he showing signs of proper development. When Amanda explained that she hadn't been able to afford to take James to the doctor for years, he insisted on setting up an appointment with a pediatrician, promising to take care of the bills.

By the time they left that night, James was tired from all of the attention, though he seemed excited to know that he finally had grandparents, and a real dad. Cole and Amanda took him home and tucked him into bed. Then Amanda took Cole's hands and led him into her bedroom.

She pulled him into bed, her movements slow and sensual. She was filled with warmth and desire, and she was finally starting to accept that everything was going to work out.

She made love to Cole, basked in the moonlight that streamed in through the window. She held his hand against her chest, their fingers intertwined, while he filled her and pleasured her. Their bodies were as one, and it was everything she could have hoped for, everything she could have dreamed for.

And she didn't give a single thought to using protection, for even though she knew she might get pregnant again, she was more than ready to bring another child into the world. They were a family now, and their family bonds were growing with each passing week. She could already see the future, and she knew that she and Cole were meant to be together. It had taken them a long time to get to this point. They had missed out on a lot of time together, years lost that could never be regained. But now that they were building their relationship, they were going to do it right. And when James, one day, had a little brother or sister, that child would grow up in a house with two parents who loved each other, who needed each other, and who would provide their children with every opportunity that they could possibly imagine.

After he came, Amanda held Cole against her chest, stroking his hair and whispering softly to him in the night. They held each other close, and for the first time in a long time, Amanda went to sleep without any fear. Because she knew that the man who held her in his arms would keep her safe, keep her close. And she knew without a doubt that when she woke up in the morning, he would still be there. and he would be there every morning after, for the rest of their live.

***THE END***

STEPBROTHER ALPHA’S BABY

Chapter one

I thought that I had it all and my dad was always that big shot that had me rolling in luxury. I had nothing but the best. I didn’t even know that there was anything to worry about until it was too late. I lived thinking that money grew on trees. Any time that I asked for something, it would be given to me freely without reservation or hesitation. Growing up, I was forced into culture and religious beliefs by my dearly departed mother.

I also had a naughty and rebellious side of my father that was most likely the cause of my father going prematurely gray. Thankfully, it didn’t make him look old. It made him look sophisticated and worldly.

You’re welcome dad.

“Jessica, I want you to come down here and apologize to your brother.” I heard my father’s voice and I knew that I was in a bit of trouble. It wasn’t anything that I couldn’t get out by batting my eyelashes or feigning innocence. It would work on my father, but my stepmother Allison was another story altogether. She never let me get away with anything. The days of having my father wrapped around my little finger had vanished a year ago.

My father was a bit of a playboy and he used his good looks and charming personality to bed down several different playmates. Thankfully, his bedroom was on the other side of this large estate and I could barely hear anything. The most that I got were mumbles and girlish glee, but it was what happened a year ago that changed everything.

We had the most amazing collection of cars and they started to dwindle, as my father started to sell them off to keep the roof over our head. He claimed that it was only a precautionary measure, but I knew that being a real estate mogul didn’t help matters. The bottom had dropped out and he was one of the few that had stuck it out to the bitter end. We downsized everything, but our home was a heritage that was passed down by his father and his father before that.

I knew that there was only so much that I could do and ignoring my father was not going to be seen in the best light. My father the consummate player had fallen for a well to do socialite. Allison was born with this silver spoon in her mouth. Her family came from old money revolving around a media empire. Why she wanted to get sidled with an instant family was beyond me. It must have been love. It was the only thing that would explain her need to drop into our lives.

She didn’t come alone and her main bit of baggage was her twenty year old son. Anthony was one of those guys that thought the world owed him something.

I was sitting on my bed in the Lotus position with the flecks of moonlight coming through the window. It was pretty damn cool to be this flexible and big boned.

I could see the bathroom and the illumination of the light underneath. I remember lying here many nights hearing him in there showering and wondering what he would look like completely naked.

“Jessica…Sarah, get down here and you are trying my patience. If you don’t want to lose television privileges and your phone, you will make an appearance whether you like it or not.” Using my middle name with my first meant that he was serious. One thing that I couldn’t do without was my phone and I pretty much had my whole life inside that thing. I even had some risqué photos of my stepbrother. I’d caught him on a couple occasions with his shirt off and was able to subtly take a few quick snapshots for my fantasy life. A six pack and muscles busting out all over the place fueled many nights alone in the room.

“OKAY…OKAY…I’m just finishing up some homework. Give me about 5 minutes and I’ll be happy to come down and face the music.” He had always considered my homework to be the one thing that I could not slack off on. He expected nothing but the best. I had an IQ that was the equivalent of Einstein himself. I didn’t have the social skills and only one real friend of the gothic persuasion. Helena was a Greek transplant to the school and we had become fast friends, despite the fact that she wore dark makeup and clothing that made her look like she was in mourning 24 hours a day.

I looked out the window and I saw his black jeep. Anthony was quite the ladies’ man and his idea of making a commitment was paying for dinner and expecting something in return. I didn’t think much of him when he first got here, but I did notice that I had those butterflies whenever he was around. I was constantly looking in his direction and biting my bottom lip with the anticipation of seeing him without his clothes on one day. He had the football player body and the gym in the basement was now getting used too. It was pretty much a second thought, but then he came along and brought with him those muscles that probably could easily carry me all over the house.

I stood at my mirror looking at my body and knowing that calisthenics and Yoga had made me the vivacious woman that I see looking back at me. My lips were adorned with the slightest bit of makeup. It was just enough to enhance my already natural beauty. I was at the perfect height at 5’8 and was carrying 160 pounds in all the right places. I had the kind of ass every woman was jealous of with more junk in the trunk. A modest pair of C cup breasts rounded off my figure. I had been told by several boyfriends that I had the most amazing green eyes that they had ever seen in their lives.

I was getting ready for bed and was wearing nothing, but a pair of very sheer panties and a white man’s shirt. It made me feel like I was closer to my father by wearing his stuff. It seemed a little silly and maybe a little creepy to some, but this was something that was between me and my father. There was nothing unsavory about our relationship. I wouldn’t consider wearing his shirt to be that strange.

I came out into the hall and I bounded down the stairs. Anthony was standing there in a pair of black chinos with a silver belt. His shirt consisted of a pullover blue Henley. His dark hair was combed straight back and that clean shaven look was only making it the much more difficult to be around him without wanting to do something.

“I don’t know what this is about, but I do hope that we can dispense with pleasantries.” Anthony had his keys in his hands and I could tell that he had found that small tiny little dent in the back of his bumper. It was so small that you would have to literally be looking right at it to see it. “If I didn’t put the dishes away, then I apologize. I’m sure that I can get to them later.” I was showing a bit of attitude, but it was mostly for Anthony’s benefit.

“Anthony has told me that you took his jeep for a joy ride. I told him that there was no possible way that you would do something like that, but then I thought about Helena. She’s always over here and to be honest I find her to be a little off putting. I believe that she might be a bad influence on you, but I would never tell you who you can be friends with. Before you say that you didn’t do it, remember that we have cameras outside in the yard.” I’d almost forgotten about that and there was virtually nothing I could do that my father wouldn’t find out about.

“We didn’t go very far. We went down to the lake to watch the fireworks the other night. It wasn’t even my fault. Some drunken jock bumped into it with his jaguar. I was only told this after the fact, but it was so small that I didn’t really concern myself.”

“You’re going to have to work it off. I suggest that you give your brother your expertise with organization. I walk by his room several times and it looks like a tornado went through it. Your punishment is one week cleaning up after him.” I didn’t enjoy being made into his personal maid, but it did offer me a unique opportunity that I never expected. I would be able to go into the inner sanctum of his bedroom. It was always off limits before, but now my father had given me the perfect way to take a look around.