My thoughts still worrying the situation at hand, I set down the grocery bags and went to find Bree with the intention of apologizing for practically mauling her but it seemed Bree had other plans.

Lo and behold, I found her all right — and by the looks of the razor held tightly in Bree’s hand — trying to escape.

“This is what I’d call the beginning of a trust issue,” I murmured in a cool tone. Did she really think she was going to cut me with a disposable razor?

Her mouth dropped open when she saw me, then, seemed to realize she was holding the razor. “Oh! Uh, this is not what it looks like,” she protested but the flush in her cheeks made her look guilty as hell. “No, honestly, I swear, I was...uh, thinking of showering.”

I continued to regard her with suspicion, causing a rabble of words to fall from her mouth as she tried to explain but honestly, I think I stopped listening as soon as she said the word ‘shower’ and my man-brain took over.

Bree in the shower.

Bree naked.

Bree slippery and wet.

“...And then, well, I don’t know what kind of vagina you like and I didn’t want you to think I was a wookie, so I thought I could tidy things up a bit-“

I stopped short. Did she just say...vagina? “What are you talking about?” I asked, confused and terribly aroused all over again. “What about a wookie?”

Bree looked exasperated at me for having to explain all over again. She crossed her arms across her chest and glared. “You know what, screw it. This crap is too complicated for someone like me who isn’t into day spas and sitting in mud up to my eyeballs with cucumbers on my eyes — cucumbers are for eating, not for your eyeballs — and honestly, women were made to have hair on their bodies, so it’s really unnatural to shave everything off, particularly in that area. I could seriously injure myself trying to shave every hair from my hoo-ha and how would I explain that kind of injury to the emergency room doctor without dying from total mortification? So, if you don’t like my vagina or anything else on my body, you can just stick your judgment up your ass because this is a one-time offer, buddy!”

Words. I didn’t have them.

“What. The. Fuck. Are you talking about? How the hell did we segue from razors to vaginas to...what offer?” I finally managed to ask.

Her cheeks were flaming red by now. Whatever she was rambling about had embarrassed the shit out of her.

I still had no clue what had just happened but I had a raging hard-on and I was really fucking confused as to why.

“Ughhhh, just forget it!”

Bree spun on her heel and practically ran back to the bedroom, presumably to hide.

But I needed answers, like, quick.

“Bree...”

“Go away,” she mumbled from beneath the pillow clutched over her head. “I’m waiting for the floor to open up and swallow me whole.”

I wanted to bite her cute ass.

I smiled and grabbed both ankles to yank her out from under the pillow. She yelped and her flushed face was adorably splotched as I flipped her over.

Instead of looking at me, she stared at the ceiling in rebellious silence.

“Look, I’m not so good at deciphering woman-speak so if you could just spell it out for me...that’d be great.”

Bree’s mouth pursed as if she were holding back a burp then, she covered her face with her arms as she started talking. “I was going to have sex with you, because, duh, you’re hot and even though you were going to kill me, now that you’re not, it might be a good idea to see what all the fuss is about before I potentially die.”

Before my brain could fully process what she was saying, Bree sat up abruptly, near bumping me in the nose with her forehead.

“I hadn’t really thought about it before but I realized I don’t want to die a virgin.”

The spit dried in my mouth.

Bree was untouched?

No man had ever breached those thighs, parted those long legs?

My heartbeat thundered in my chest, making it difficult to breathe.

“And then I thought of other things, like what if you don’t like my vagina? Or the fact that I have hairy legs? And...other hairy things? I’m no supermodel, you know. And I’m sure you’re accustomed to knocking boots with strippers and porn stars who can swivel on your penis like a Cirque de Soleil act but I don’t know what the hell I’m doing and...it’s...intimidating.”

That last admission came out in a tiny voice that pulled at my heart.

She was worried I wouldn’t like her vagina?

Was this really a thing women worried about?

I realized she was still staring at me, waiting for my response, practically vibrating with female insecurity.

How could I say that I didn’t care if she was covered in fur, I’d still want to bury myself balls deep inside her hot pussy?

Crude as hell but the raw truth.

I couldn’t explain it either.

Everything about Bree turned me on.

Even the prospect of muff-diving into that hairy bush.

Hell, in my current frame of mind, I’d willingly floss my teeth with her pubes if it meant I could taste that sweet cherry.

“Bree...”

She dared to meet my gaze, her voice tremulous. “Yeah?”

“You worry about stupid shit.”

Before she could protest, I grabbed her by the crook of the neck and laid my claim on that mouth, kissing her hard and deep, a preview of what I was going to do to that pristine pussy.

Bree didn’t know it yet, but she was all mine. I was going to plow that body and leave her shaking because when I was through, she’d never open her legs again without thinking of me, of how I was the first to break her apart.

Saddle up, baby girl. Shit’s about to get real between you and me.

Starting...right...now.