Three Months Later
Nix
“I’m gonna throw up.”
“Nix,” Rose giggles, “she’s gonna love it. This is so cute.”
“What if she doesn’t want this?”
“Want what?”
“To marry me,” I murmur.
My sister’s eyes widen. She only pauses a moment before immediately running over.
“Look at me, Nix. No chance in hell. That woman adores you, and you adore her. Your love is next level. It’s just paperwork. Besides,” she grins mischievously, “you gotta get this outta the way so you can start having babies.”
“Babies?” I choke.
She throws her head back and laughs. “Oh, my big, bad brother, you’re so oblivious. Your girl has baby fever. Do you see her eyes when she sees Lacey’s kids or even hears about them? She goes doe eyed. You two have never discussed children?”
“No! Fuck, no. What?”
“Oh, bro,” she says as she squeezes my shoulder, “you’re in for a lifetime of surprises. I can’t wait to be a part of it.”
She winks and goes back to arranging the flowers. I move Pamela and take a deep breath.
Why is this so fucking scary? Why is everything worth having so damn terrifying?
* * *
Sage
I head back to the house. Therapy was particularly hard today, but my therapist is careful with me. She doesn’t make me lay all my cards on the table at once. The process of healing has been slow and steady.
Therapy is right down the road, so I walk there. Walk. It’s amazing. The sun is bright and warm on my skin. The birds sing. It’s all so gorgeous. I almost wanna cry every day.
I push the door to our home open and immediately know something’s not right.
“Nix?” I call shakily.
“It’s okay. Don’t be scared.”
That’s when I see it. The small vases of flowers on the table and barstool. Pamela by a tiny black box. Nix in a suit. A. Suit. My Nix.
Oh no. My eyes immediately fill with water.
“Nix?” I whimper.
He comes over and wraps me in his strong arms. He gently leads me to the couch. My whole body is vibrating so hard that if he wasn’t being so sure to keep one hand on me at all times, I’m pretty sure I would topple over.
“Sage, I love you so much.” He rubs my hair with a large hand. “You’re my first real example of what love is, and princess, I love you so fucking much.”
He squeezes my face passionately before dropping to a knee.
I break down crying.
He grabs the little black box from Pamela and slowly opens it with water in his eyes.
“Sage Briar-Rose, will you marry me?”
* * *
Four Months Later
Sage
“I can’t believe we did that!” I squeal as Nix tugs me in close to him. I lean back against him in our first class seats.
He just smirks. I swat at his chest. Dumb man!
“We eloped!” I shriek. “We’re married. Eloped. We flew to Vegas on a whim and eloped.”
“Say eloped again,” he teases.
“We eloped, Nix!” My eyes bug out.
He laughs and turns around, holding my shoulders gently.
“Do you regret it?”
My shoulders fall. “No. I didn’t want a big wedding with my dad still ill. I just want you to be my husband. I don’t want to be celebrating when he’s still recovering. I don’t want to be overwhelmed with planning and people. I just love you, that’s all.”
He smiles. “Then what’s with the dramatics, doll?”
I smirk a little. Good point.
“I guess there’s such a stigma around it.”
“We’ve been together more than eight years. We didn’t decide to do this on some drunken night. We planned this. For months now.”
I wrap my arms around him. “I know. I’m sorry. I’m so happy.”
He chuckles and hugs me back. “I know.”
I swat at his head. His smile tells me everything I need to know. “Sleep, princess. I’m getting drinks.”
I think for a moment, letting my fear and months of therapy go to war.
Fuck it.
“Get me a drink, too.”
His eyebrows shoot up. I hold my hand up for the flight attendant.
“Can you get us two beers, please?”
He takes my hand and kisses it. I laugh.
“My bomb-ass wife.”
I poke his nose. “Don’t forget it.”
“I won’t, Mrs. Briar-Rose.”
“Good, Mr. Briar-Rose.”
He smirks.
Yep, Nix took my last name. Untraditional, yes. Perfect for us, definitely yes. He’s no longer a Marketta. That name brings no good. Rose didn’t even keep that last name.
And both of us are honored to be related to my father. A man who truly knows how to repent, learn, and grow. A man who built himself from the ground up and gave it all up for me when I needed him most.
A man I know will build himself back up again.
So here we are. Mr. and Mrs. Briar-Rose.
* * *
Three Years Later
“Wanna go see Grandpa, pumpkin?”
Chubby cheeks and, I swear, if I didn’t know better, annoyed eyes stare back at me.
Nix laughs behind me and goes over my shoulder to talk to our son.
“Let me try this. Damien, you are going to see your grandpa. Be good.” Nix kisses my cheek. “There.”
“Nix!” I gasp. “He’s only one. You have to be gentle.”
“That’s my son. You just gotta tell him what to do. Trust me.”
“He’s my son, too, and he needs gentle.”
Nix smirks. “Is he pouting?”
I pull my little angel away to see his face. Of course he’s completely calm, the little fat on his cheeks spilling over.
I give Nix a flat look.
“Asshole.”
He (fake) gasps. “Don’t say that in front of my son.”
I laugh. “You’re gonna raise a monster,” I mutter.
“We won’t let him be a monster,” he whispers in my ear, gentle and sincere.
I squeeze Damien in tighter to my chest. Thirty minutes later, we are at my parents’ house. Molly gives me a tight-lipped smile. I stopped calling Molly “mom” completely. I’m over it. We have our moments, but she’s no mom. It doesn’t bother me anymore.
“Hello, Molly.”
“How’s my grandson?”
God, she might as well be asking about the weather.
“Good.”
I push past her and enter the house, Damien held tight against me. Nix walks in behind me, carrying all of Damien’s things.
I find my dad in his office. Pride swells in my chest. You’d never know. You’d never know all he has to fight every day. He’ll never be “better”. He’ll never be completely healed, but you know what? He can run his business. He gets up every day, puts his favorite suits on, and builds his empire with my mom by his side. She’s been nothing but loyal to him. She’s taken on a bigger role in the company to make up for my dad’s weaknesses. With them as a team, the world will never know the things my dad struggles with behind closed doors.
Oh, and he never blamed me. Not for one second.
“Dad!”
He looks up from his computer and smiles at me. Well, Damien, let’s be honest.
“How are my two favorite people?”
Nix pops up behind us, leaning against the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest.
“Hi Charles.”
“Hi, son, how are you?”
“I’m very good, thank you.”
The two men share a look I can’t quite interpret. Damien breaks the moment. He starts to cry and kick and scream. Of course, the second I place him in his grandfather’s arms, he stops.
I roll my eyes.
The two men laugh at me.
Just me and all my boys.
And I’ve never been happier. I couldn’t ask for more.
* * *
“You sure he’s okay?” I bite my lower lip.
“Yes, Sage. I promise. Lacey will protect him as if he’s her own. She even went to Rose and Sven’s place to keep Damien away from the mansion while you’re not there. It’s one night.”
I hold a hand over my stomach. Nix smiles and places his hand there as well.
“Our little princess.”
He kisses my lips hard.
“I thought I was your princess,” I murmur.
“You’re my queen, now, babe.”
“Cheesy motherfucker you are.”
He pushes me back on the couch. His erection is hard against my inner thigh.
“Yes, Yoda,” he mumbles.
“Nix,” I whisper, feeling my hips buck up against him.
“Babe,” he groans, long and hard.
I’m twenty pounds overweight. My hair’s not done. My make-up’s, eh. Minimal. This pregnancy has not treated me kindly.
But Nix finds me beautiful.
He’s so excited to have a night with me.
His sloppy, mentally unstable wife.
But that’s my story. It’s messy, dirty and definitely unstable. The story of a girl who only wanted love. How that, in its naive form, left her shattered in the beginning.
And the story of the man who never gave up on her. The man who understood what it is to be unloved and abused. Who loved her even as she grew and changed.
I’m accepted. Wholly and completely.