Chapter Ten

Bailey

I groaned at Arthur’s statement as he confirmed exactly what I knew he was thinking. He had the wrong impression of Emily and the kids. He wasn’t even allowing me to explain fully to him. Not that I owed him an explanation, but seeing the way he had been looking at me in the restaurant, I knew he thought I was playing him. I didn’t want to leave him with that impression when I was really into him. I didn’t plan to do anything about it though, but to explain what the kids and Emily meant to me. This holiday was still all about the kids. I had already gone too far anyway by bailing out on them to go after Arthur.

He crossed the threshold and since he looked like he was going to shut the door anytime now, I took a step into his suite. I was instantly blindsided by the luxury. This wasn’t any ordinary cabin. Without a doubt, the tickets he had bought me had fine accommodations like this one. His bed looked big enough to get lost in, and there was a chair set just before a door partially opened which led to the balcony and a view of the sea.

“What do you want?” he snapped at me.

My gaze traveled back to him, and I jumped when he pushed the door closed behind me. He just gave it a shove over my shoulder, and it was done. I was trapped with him. Well, not really trapped, but that was the way I felt. My inability to leave then wasn’t about him locking me in though. It had more to do with my desire to stay.

“I just want to explain.”

“Why the fuck are you here, Bailey?” he snarled at me.

“I told you. To talk about earlier and what you just saw.”

My back hit the door before I expected it. His hand planted firmly in my chest, he kept me pinned to the door.

“You’ve got kids, man?” he snapped at me.

I hesitated in answering the question. If I answered yes, he would think the kids were biologically mine, and if I answered no, I would feel like disowning the children, which I would never do. I could try to explain, but he wasn’t even allowing me to get more than three words in.

“Yes, but I—”

“I can’t fucking believe you have kids and a woman,” he snarled in my face.

“Look, they are mine, but not really mine.”

“They are hers then?”

I almost said no, but I stopped myself in time. He hadn’t even attempted to call me any at all after we had sex. What right did he think he had to get so livid as though we had come at a conclusion that we were exclusive? All that had happened between us was one day of madness I regretted every day because he never called. He made me feel cheap like I had sold him my ass for those tickets. In fact, I should have never come after him.

“You fucking kidding me right now?” I asked him, slapping his hand away from my chest. “We fucked once. You haven’t even called me. Why do you think you now have a right to act up because I took someone else on this cruise with me?”

“You mean the way you called me?” he replied, his voice turning husky. “I have every right in the world to ask you that question, and you know it.”

“That’s bullshit.”

“Is it?”

Before I could reply, he had me pinned to the door again, but this time he was on me, his mouth pressing to mine. Instead of pulling away, I found myself clinging to him in desperation. So many nights I had lain awake remembering how good it had felt to be with him that day. I often wondered what if we had gotten a whole night instead of a few minutes that day?

Arthur tasted of vodka, but I couldn’t blame intoxication for the weakness in my knees. The cocktail swirling through my blood, making me unstable had nothing to do with alcohol. It had everything to do with the man whose kisses drugged me more than any drink could have. My hands fisted in his shirt, clinging to purchase as I sought to stay grounded, but all was lost. He had my shirt unbuttoned before I even knew he was undoing the buttons. I should have stopped him when he reached for my belt, but my cock needed too much attention, and he wanted to give it to me. Who was I to stop him?

“Do you know how much I stay awake at night thinking about doing this?” he whispered against my mouth. He trailed kisses across my jawbone. “Are you messing with me, Bailey?”

I shook my head. “Oh god, no.”

“Such a shame I don’t believe you.”

I opened my mouth to protest and nearly swallowed his tongue. He kissed me, scrambling my thoughts. He peeled the jeans down the swell of my ass, releasing it to fall about my thighs. He grasped my cheeks hard, his hands lifting and spreading, squeezing hard enough to make me gasp.

“Arthur,” I moaned his name, pushing my hands beneath the hem of his shirt to stroke his belly. I didn’t mind that he wasn’t carved like I was. In fact, I loved the way he was bigger than me. There was something about his imperfect size that made me feel protected in his arms. It was the dumbest thing ever, but that was how he made me feel, like he wouldn’t let anything hurt me.

This is nothing but sex, I tried to caution my fluttering heart as Arthur knelt to strip off my jeans this time. When I was completely naked before him, he trailed his tongue up my leg, until he arrived at the juncture of my thighs. I placed my hands on the door behind me, bracing as his mouth slid down my shaft in one fluid motion.

“Holy fuck,” I gasped, clenching my ass at the shiver that ran through my whole body.

He released my cock way too soon, but at the back of my mind, I remembered that I had another ten minutes tops before I needed to return to Emily and the kids. This was just a stolen moment I was capitalizing on. I kissed his neck, moaning as he reached for his cock. With only saliva for lube, he grasped me by the waist and lifted me while pressing me into the door at my back. I knew I wasn’t exactly a featherweight, and that he was able to do this made my heart lurch. I wrapped my legs around his waist, my mouth fastening onto his as he ran his hand down my back, fingers trailing between my cheeks. He filled me with his fingers, digit after digit stroking inside my body, preparing me before he guided his cock to where we both wanted it. He slid in, thrusting in and out until he was filling me up.

“Oh god, yes,” I moaned, my head smacking into the door as his strokes got deeper. The muscles in his legs were bunched from supporting my weight, but he didn’t let it deter him. He kissed me, sucking my tongue into his mouth. I reached between our bodies to grasp my cock, stroking to his rhythm. His grunts filled the room, mingling with my pants, and it was the perfect melody for the passionate lyrics coaxed from our bodies.

“Oh my god, Bailey. I can’t—”

My back hit the door hard behind me as he lost control and nailed me against the solid oak. I cried out from the intensity, my toes curling as his thrusts became more urgent. My hands pumped my cock even harder, and the door rattled from our frantic attempt to get to the peak just ahead.

A bang on our door startled me, and my eyes flew open. “Everything alright in there?” someone shouted.

My heart pounded in my chest, and I almost answered that we were fine, but Arthur’s warning look kept me quiet. Then he thrust into me again, rattling the door. I couldn’t contain my moan.

“Ah, well you could have just said you were fucking,” the voice grumbled.

I almost laughed at the ridiculousness of what just happened, but at that moment, Arthur drove deep inside my body, stroking that sweet spot. I gasped, my ass tightening. “Oh fuck, Arthur,” I gasped, staring into his eyes. “I’m coming.”

I did exactly that, splattering his chest as he pressed me into the door and thrust in me repeatedly. With a grunt, he buried himself deep inside me at the same time he smashed his lips into mine. I felt the warmth of his cum filling my satisfied body.

Even after he had stopped thrusting, Arthur still kissed me. I wrapped my arms around his broad shoulders, and he squeezed me to him, his belly feeling rather nice against my stomach. His cock slid out, and I could feel his cum begin its downward slide.

I tore my lips away from Arthur. “Oh fuck, no, we didn’t!” I pushed at his shoulders. “Arthur, let me down and point me to the bathroom.”

He released me, looking startled. “Why? What’s wrong?”

“We didn’t use a condom!” I cried. “What the hell, man!”

“Fuck,” he remarked. “Well, stop looking at me as if I’m the only one responsible. You were just as caught up in the moment.”

“Bathroom!” I snapped at him, trying not to let the fear of how reckless we had been overwhelm me.

He pointed me in the direction, and I grabbed my clothes from the floor, turning away from him without further acknowledging him. Once in the bathroom, I shut the door and started cleaning up. So stupid. How could I have been so reckless? I had never ever gone without rubber. Not even when I was on the streets and sex was the quickest way to get cash to ensure I didn’t starve. Especially because of then I was careful about what went inside of me, and it was always wrapped up. What was it about Arthur that made me lose every goddamn sense I ever had?

I was done cleaning up and was putting on my clothes when he walked into the bathroom without even knocking. I refused to look at him, but concentrated on zipping my jeans like I was learning calculus.

“Bailey, look at me.”

I blinked away frustrating tears. I didn’t even know him, and I had done this very stupid thing. Emily and the twins were waiting for me, and I had been more interested in getting barebacked. Why the hell did I think I was a good parent? My mother was right. They deserved better than me. I couldn’t even keep a goddamn roof over all our heads.

“Please.”

At the word, I felt myself crumbling. It wasn’t about him and what we had just done. It was the pressure of the past year, losing the closest person to me and now about to lose the twins. I turned my face away from him so he didn’t see the tears that spilled down my cheeks. I scrubbed at them, trying to be as discreet as possible.

“Jesus, Bailey, you don’t have to cry about it,” he stated, sounding frustrated. “Yeah, it was a dumb thing, but I promise you that I’m good. You don’t have anything to worry about.”

“Nobody knows for sure.”

“I’m positive,” he said with a grin.

I turned to scowl at him. “How can you be making puns at this time?”

He shrugged. “Because as I said, I’m quite certain I’m safe. I keep on top of my status. Can you say the same?”

“Of course I can,” I replied. I hadn’t hooked up with anyone in such a long time.

“Then we have nothing to worry about. The worst that can happen is you getting knocked up.” His grin widened, and while I gave him mental props for trying to lighten the situation, I was still pissed at our lack of responsibility.

My phone rang, interrupting our conversation. I dug it from the pocket of my jeans and groaned when I saw it was Emily. This was definitely a déjà vu moment.

“I’ve got to take this,” I told him, then turned so I didn’t have to watch his reaction. His face was already turning hard. Fuck. I should have explained everything to him before I allowed him to almost slip my back out against his room door.

“Hey, Em,” I answered the call.

“Thank God!” she cried. “I just started to think someone had pushed you overboard. Where are you?”

“Umm, I’ll explain when I get there.”

“Well, I took the kids back to our cabin,” she replied. “Don’t rush over on our account, but promise me you’ll fill me in on all the details later.”

“Some,” I answered. “I’ll be there soon.”

“Uh, Bailey, are you okay?” she asked before I could hang up.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just give me a few minutes, and I promise I’ll be there.”

“Alright.”

I hung up the phone, and by then I had gotten rid of all the tears. I turned to face Arthur, but I settled my gaze on his shoulder, refusing to meet his eyes. God, I needed to talk to Ollie. He would know the right thing to say. One of the toughest things I had to do was move away from him since we became good friends. I had thought it would be a good way for me to get over seeing him with Drew. As much as I thought it wouldn’t have affected me, it did, but over time the hurt slowly went away. Only our friendship remained.

“You should go,” Arthur stated, standing aside to show me the door. “And you should probably stay away from me for the rest of the cruise. I think that would be best for everyone involved.”

I tried not to let my shock show, but all the color drained from my face. “What?”

He shrugged. “You heard me. We had a nice little recap of our first time, but now things are getting rather stale, don’t you think?”

“Why are you saying this?” I asked in surprise. Nothing felt stale about what we just did. “I was hoping you’d let me explain. The twins aren’t my kids, Arthur. They are my brother’s.”

“And I guess that’s why the little boy especially looks just like you?”

I opened my mouth to argue with him, but seeing the stern look on his face, I knew it didn’t make any sense for me to try to explain further. He wouldn’t believe me. He didn’t want to believe me. Or he wanted it to be true so he didn’t have to deal with the consequences of sleeping with me. Did he think I wanted anything from him?

I had so many questions to ask him, and so much to explain, but I no longer counted it as worth it. Now was hardly the time for me to try to start a relationship. My vow to my brother came first. Those kids were my family, and I was about to lose them. Only that mattered. Not Arthur and his distrustful manner. Certainly not the way he made me forget about my problems when I was in his arms. It was all just an illusion. At the end of the day, I still had these problems to face when the aftermath of sex wore off. And it eventually would. A man like Arthur only used boys like me. I had met them quite often while I was on the streets, and I didn’t want to be anybody’s pet again.

“Goodbye, Arthur,” I said, noticing the way his eyes widened as though he thought I would have argued. My shirt still in hand, I brushed by him out of the bathroom. Walking away felt hard, too hard for a man I still didn’t know despite sleeping with him twice.

I was in no place to handle a relationship with another man. My promise to my brother came before everything else. I couldn’t get distracted on this holiday just because I couldn’t remember sex ever feeling this good.