Chapter 29 – I Win

 

“He’s not cooperating.  He said there’s no way in hell he’s giving a DNA sample.  There isn’t enough evidence for a warrant.  He might have caused a small scene at the party, but he left and didn’t come back.  That’s not enough in the court’s mind to issue a warrant for DNA,” Jude says to me over the phone.

“So that’s it?” I ask, looking across Rosa’s house full of her family and friends who have gathered after the funeral. 

My eyes are on Paige.  She’s talking to Leigh, Gabby and Rosa’s daughter.  She’s worn a constant face of contemplation mixed with worry since the night of the Star Wars party, even if she’s doing her best to hide it.  I want to believe it has to do with the death of her friend, but unfortunately, I think it has more to do with me.  If I hadn’t taken so long to get my shit together, we could be passed this by now. 

I haven’t let her return to her apartment, she’s been back with us for four days and three nights.  As often as I’ve explained to Jordy that her leaving was my fault, he held on to his grudge.  Yesterday, he finally let that go and I could tell Paige wasn’t just relieved, but down right happy.  The two of them were thick as thieves last night and seeing them together again was so good, it was almost painful.  I’m furious with myself for causing that rift in the first place.  She’s back to her normal self with the kids, but with me?  I’m not even close.

I went back to her apartment to collect more of her stuff and this time got as much as I could.  There’s no reason for her to go back.  She’s been a whirlwind at home like she was before, getting her clean freak on, but this time doing it with even more vigor.  So much so, I have a feeling she’s cleaning to avoid me.  And damn it, I don’t give a shit about the house.

But since she’s been back, she crawls into my bed without question and into my arms.  I talk to her, ask her if she’s okay, she assures me she’s fine and goes to sleep.  Then she rolls away from me and hogs the bed like she used to.  I’ve not pushed her for anything more and she hasn’t let on she wants anything more besides clinging to me before sleep.  I haven’t had her since the night of the Star Wars party.  She’s different, not herself, but not quite moody.  She’s strangely withdrawn, but not quiet. 

Basically, she’s back but she’s not back.  And I know it’s my fault.

“Unfortunately, that’s it,” Jude answers.  “There’s nothing more you can do other than keep an eye on her.  My gut still says it was Brian who broke into her apartment and did that sick shit, but it’s circumstantial.  Sorry, man.”

“I’ll keep an eye on her.  And she’s not going back to her apartment, that’s for sure.  I appreciate the update,” I say.

“Tell Paige I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to the funeral, my case blew up last night and I needed to be here.  Gabby said she’s taking it hard,” Jude says.

“I appreciate it and I’ll let her know,” I say before we disconnect.

“No warrant?” Tony asks, listening to my side of the conversation.

“Nope,” I say sliding my phone into my suit pocket. 

“Dad and I thought that was a reach.  Not enough evidence,” he says.  Then he fully turns to me and moves on to the subject of his little sister.  It feels like old times when he scowls, “You two back together?”

I look at Paige.  She catches my eyes and gives me a hesitant smile before turning her attention back to the women. I sigh, “She’s back and she isn’t going anywhere, even if she wants to.  The together part will come, I hope sooner than later.”

“You gonna give her what she wants?” he asks, knowing I know what he’s talking about. 

Trying not to look pissed because I know I bought this, I put it simply, “She’ll get everything she wants, Tony.”

Tony looks at his wife, cousin and sister before he tries to hide a smirk when he mutters, “Good.”

Finally.  Being on Tony Carpino’s bad side is an annoyance I don’t need. 

He finally smiles when he asks, “This mean softball is back on?”

I shake my head no but say, “Sure.”

Not able to keep my eyes off her wherever she is in the room, I find her looking at me but her eyes seem unfocused.  She’s got a small frown playing on her face and looks deep in thought, caught in another world.  I frown, tipping my head in question and she finally blinks out of her spell.  Her eyes immediately well up, her body language telling me she’s upset. 

I can’t stop myself from moving to her as I say to Tony, “I’m gonna get her out of here.  I’ll let you know about softball.”

I don’t wait for him to answer, but hear him say, “Sounds good.”

Her tears start to spill by the time I get close enough to ask, “Baby, what’s wrong?” at the same I hear Leigh’s voice, “Are you okay?”

She gives her head a little shake as I put my hands to her waist on her midnight blue dress.  It hits her above the knees, fitting like a glove everywhere, and she’s taller than her usually small self in her spiked heels.  When I pull her to me, I ask quietly, “You want me to take you home?”

She swallows hard and nods, not able to utter a word.  Putting my arm around her, I pull her to my side and we move out the door without saying goodbye to anyone.  When I get her outside, I ask, “What happened in there?”

“Please, I need to go,” she begs.

I move her to my Expedition as quick as I can with her in her shoes, “Anything you want.”

For some reason, she starts crying harder when I finally maneuver her up in the truck in her dress and heels.  After I climb in beside her, she looks over and says in a shaky voice, “I’m sorry.”

I pull away from the curb and reach over to grab her hand, “There’s nothing to be sorry for.  I can’t stand seeing you upset.”

She keeps hold of my hand with a death grip without another word as I make my way to the outskirts of town.  She’s silent the whole way, never letting me go as she wipes her face and breathes deep, trying to control her tears. 

I make it to the end of Athica Lane and pull into the garage next to her car.  She makes her way into the house quickly and goes to the island, setting down her small purse.  I’m about to make her tell me why she’s upset when she turns and states, “You didn’t trust me.”

I stop where I am across the kitchen and feel my body go taut, “What?”

“I don’t mean just me.  You didn’t trust anyone, and that included me,” she says.

“What are you talking about?” I ask.

“Before,” she goes on with an unsteady voice.  “When I told you I wanted kids and it was the only thing I wanted more than you.  You weren’t there yet because of her and you sent me away.”

I feel a rock form in my gut because I don’t know where she’s going with this.  I take a step closer and say as soft as I can, “I told you I’ve worked through that.  It took me longer than it should’ve, but I want what you want.  Don’t ever question that again.”

“You know I’d never do anything to hurt you,” she keeps on talking in circles.  “You trust me now.  It took me a while to realize it, but it wasn’t just me.  You did it because you didn’t trust anyone and you had to let that go.  But you did.  You let it go for me.”

“Paige,” I demand frowning.  “What’s going on?”

“And you love me,” she adds, softening her voice.

I sigh and feel my face relax a fraction as I confirm, “Yes, baby, I love you.”

“And I love you,” she responds quickly but her tears start to well again.  She gives her head a little shake when she goes on, “I think I might’ve loved you the moment I saw you throw Cara up in the air the first time.  The first time I saw you smile at Jordy.  At the time, I didn’t dream there was even a possibility you could be mine.  But that was the moment it became clear what I wanted for me.  I wanted some form of you.  Someone who would love me because I was lucky enough to be the one he wanted.  Someone I could make happy, give babies to and for him look at those babies the way you look at Jordy and Cara.  Someone I could love back and I hope, give as good as I got.  I never thought I’d get the chance at the real you.  But I did.  I got the tiniest taste of you and Jordy and Cara, and I fell.  I fell so hard.  The three of you were it for me.”  She swallows hard through her tears, her words flowing over me like silk, before she rips me to shreds, “Then you sent me away,” she goes on, her voice hitching.  Her tone dips when she finishes, “Then I didn’t trust you.”

I feel my face fall and my gut clench.  I start to move to her but she puts her hand up, halting me in my spot before she keeps going, “I forgot and I don’t know how I could forget.  I probably put it out of my head because it was just days after you left me.  But it came to me the second you looked over at me as we stood in Rosa’s house just then.  She was always telling me things, not really giving me advice, but being bossy about how I should live my life.  I always thought it was cute or funny, but now that she’s gone, I hate myself for not writing down every single one of them so I could remember them forever, no matter how ridiculous some of them were.  Just days after you sent me away, she held me in her arms and told me you’d be back.  She said as she rocked me back and forth, ‘That fellow, he’ll be back for you, Paige.’  Then she made me promise not to make you work for it and I broke my promise.”

Tired of being far away from her, needing to touch her, I move until I have her against the island.   I look down and demand, “I don’t like this.  What in the hell are you talking about?”

She slides her hands up my chest, inside my suit jacket and melts into me, saying through her wet eyes, “I made you work for it because I was afraid and didn’t trust you.  For three days I was scared you’d change your mind, I didn’t even know I was doing it.  But I made you work for it and I shouldn’t have.  I should have trusted you.”

I finally exhale in relief, understanding this isn’t going to go bad and look down into her big, brown eyes, “So fucking sweet.  I deserve to be dragged over the coals for what I did.”

I feel her melt further when she whispers the truth, this time with content in her voice, “If this works out, you want what I want.”

“Paige,” I say with a warning in my voice. “There’s no ‘ifs’ about it.  This is going to work out, no one other than me is going to give you the babies you want.”

Her tear-stained face smiles and she informs me, “You love me.”

I can’t help but tip my mouth and respond, “You loved me first.”

I see a look come over her face, a look I haven’t seen in what feels like forever.  It’s a look I came to love.  I realize now how much I’ve missed that look when she gazes up like she knows she’s one-upped me and says quietly, but with a hint of her old attitude, “Well then.  I win.”

I find myself shaking my head before letting my eyes close in relief.  I can’t help it, she’s not just back.  She’s back.  I pull her into me at the same time I lean in to kiss her.  When she gives me her weight like she used to, I’m overcome by how much I’ve missed her, how close I came to losing her for good.  How I wouldn’t have her now if she wasn’t the selfless dream she’s proven to be. 

When I finally pull away and look into her big brown eyes with those gold flecks glinting, she asks, “How many do you want?”

I feel my smile form thinking about making babies with Paige, thinking I’m the biggest jackass for not realizing sooner that nothing could make life sweeter than making a bigger family with her.  Giving her a squeeze, I say, “I’m good with one or two.  Three with Jordy and Cara’ll give us a basketball team.  Any more than that, we’ll have to go into negotiations.”

“A basketball team?” she smiles.

“Five starters,” I grin.

“I’m good with two,” she smiles bigger.

I shrug my shoulders, “A relay team, then.”

She frowns through her smile, “A relay team?”

“Yeah, in track, they pass the baton.  Or swimmers, whichever.”

She rolls her eyes, her sass sweeping through me like a feast for a starving man, “You do remember my boot camp experience, right?  I can’t promise you athletic children, Cam.”

“It doesn’t matter,” I tease.  “My swimmers’ll make up for your un-athleticism.” 

She slaps my shoulder lightly as she grins back.

“And speaking of my swimmers,” I keep on. “Until we decide to put this plan in motion, you need to get on the pill.”

She sighs a content sigh, “I’ll start right after my next period.”

I look down and say full of meaning, “You’re back.”

Melting further into me, she whispers, “I’m back.”

I let my eyes drift over her face and tell her the truth, “Never loved you more than right now.  You gave me back your sweet, even though I don’t deserve it.”

“Cam,” she whispers.

“You made me a lucky man,” I say.

“Stop,” she insists.

“Could’ve lost you, it would’ve been my own doing,” I go on.

“Okay, I changed my mind. I want a basketball team,” she teases.  “If you keep going, we’ll have to go into negotiations.”

I feel my body relax and smile, but turn my head to check the time before I complain, “Kills me, the kids’ll be home from school in a few minutes.  I could bury myself in you for hours.  Early to bed tonight.”

“Early to bed,” she agrees with a small smile.

I lean down to touch my lips to hers while giving her ass a squeeze, “I’ve gotta get out of this suit.”

I move away from her, but on my way out of the kitchen I hear her call for me, “Cam?”  I stop at the opening to the family room and turn back to look at her.  Her voice is soft when she says, “It feels good to be back.”

“Welcome home, baby,” I say.  She smiles before I have a chance to narrow my eyes on her and reiterate in a low voice, “Early to bed.”

  And then, my woman, standing in my kitchen that’s really meant to be hers, home where she’s supposed to be, bites her lip and shifts slightly to her other foot.  I know my woman and I know what that means.  She’s wet for me and now I have to fight against being hard all afternoon and evening. 

I shake my head slowly as she fights a grin, because she knows that I know.

*****

“No, why are you stopping?” I exclaim.

“Want you on top of me.  I want to come with you and I want to watch,” he breathes.

“Want, want, want,” I mock him through my labored breaths.  I was on the verge and he stopped.  “You never stop when I’m that close.”

He moves to his back while I start to climb over him, watching him roll on a condom.  I can’t wait to be on birth control. 

“Hurry,” I complain.

“You missed my cock?” he grins.

“Cam,” I repeat on a whine.

“Climb on, baby,” he says, but before I have the chance to climb, he yanks me by my bare hips, dragging me over him. 

Once I’ve straddled him, he wastes no time surging up at the moment I meet him, sinking down.  When I do, I feel it everywhere.  Inside me where he fills me up, my clit, down to my bones and straight to my heart.  He lifts his hips and I move with him, his big hands cupping my breasts, working my nipples. 

I look down where he’s looking up to me and breathe the truth, “I’ve missed you.  I’ve missed this.”

I watch his eyes slowly droop until they shut completely and his hands on me tense.  His face is pained when he murmurs one word, “Baby.”

But I feel it and start to move faster, feeling it build where he left me hanging minutes ago.  As much as I hated him stopping, I can’t wait because we’ve never come together, he always took care of me first.  I honestly thought it would be too hard to coordinate.

One of his hands trails down my body, going straight to my clit where he opens his eyes and he encourages me, “That’s it, baby.  You feel it?”

His thumb starts to move on me and that feels even better.  I move faster, he raises his hips higher for me to get more leverage and I can’t manage to answer him, but I do moan. 

His other hand comes to my hip helping me move to match his thrusts.  It’s all so good, better than I remember and I’m close, I feel the eruption building. 

“Cam,” I call for him and he thrusts harder. 

“Yes, baby,” he breathes and when I look, he’s looking down his body at his hand, watching our connection.  When his eyes lift to meet mine, they’re now smoldering.  I feel his thumb move faster.  Just when I feel my body tumble over the edge, I’m forced to lean forward on his shoulders as I come apart.  Cam presses his head back in the pillow and I see the muscles in his neck, chest and arms tense.  His hands, grasping my hips, yank me down and as he thrusts up two more times before holding me still. 

Spent, I collapse on his chest.  His hands go to my head and ass, holding me where I lay, our bodies damp from exertion.  Who needs boot camp when I can work up a sweat with my own personal trainer, Coach Montgomery?

I feel him squeeze me at the same time his goatee comes to my temple where he murmurs, “Love you.”

I sink into him further and press down on his cock.  I feel my throat become thick as he keeps murmuring into the side of my head before I can respond.

“Thought I lost you.  Thought I fucked up my chance at your sweet forever.”

And they work their way up from my throat to my eyes.

“You gave me this back when I didn’t deserve it,” he carries on, making the tears leak from my eyes with the sweetest apology and thank you known to mankind.  

“Please stop,” I manage to speak.  “Just when I think I’m all cried out, you make me cry again.”

He rolls me and when he has me on my back but still connected, he presses into me one more time as he catches a tear with his thumb.  He says, “I’m going to do everything I can to give you as good as you give us.  I know we just got you back, but I need you to do something for me so I can do my best to take care of you.”

“Anything,” I answer quickly, because it’s true.

“I want you here, for good.  Give notice at your apartment.  It’s only just after the first of the month, they shouldn’t have a problem with you being out in three and a half weeks,” he says.

“So soon?” I ask.

“You anxious to spend time away from me?” he frowns.

“Well, no.”

“Then give notice.  I don’t like you there and the sooner you’re officially out the better.  I want you here,” he presses into me on his last word for good measure.

I feel him everywhere, so it doesn’t take much for me to relent and breathe, “Okay.”

“Okay,” he approves.  “Last, until they figure out who messed with your apartment, you’re not there.  Ever.  You’re here.  You can work from here, cook from here and be here.  I’ve got to be at school all day, but if you absolutely need to go out, we’ll arrange something with your dad and brother.  I bet Jude and Lanny’ll kick in.  I don’t want you out all over the place, let your mom and sisters do your shopping.  The rest you can do from here with the alarm set and phone close.  You know I think it’s that guy who fucked with your apartment and I know you disagree – ”

“His name is Brian,” I interrupt.

“Whatever,” he keeps on.  “You’re you and only see the good in people, but I want you to promise me you won’t see him. Don’t take a call from him and by all means, do not let him in if he comes here and you’re alone.  He had every opportunity to submit a DNA test to prove it wasn’t him, and he refused.  That tells me—without a doubt—it’s him.  I don’t give a shit what his rights are to refuse a test.  An innocent man doesn’t cast a shadow on himself by refusing to prove his innocence.  You’ve got to see that.”

I look up into his intense face and bite my lip, saying quietly, “It did surprise me when he refused the test.  I know that makes him look guilty, but he’s been my friend for so long.  I still can’t believe he would do this, but I’m not stupid.  I do see the possibility of it being him.”

“Good,” he breathes, probably worried he’d have to lock me up and throw away the key.  “Then you’ll lay low for the time being?  Keep yourself safe until this plays out?”

I shift underneath him as best as I can with his heavy bulk pressing me to the bed, “I will.  I’d be stupid not to, plus my schedule is so heavy over the next few weeks, I wouldn’t have time to gallivant if I wanted.  I threw myself into my work to keep my mind off of you and I’m overextended with events.  I’m hoping Charlotte will help me out in the short term to get me through the next month.  I’ve already hired her to take over advertising for the blog.  She’s better at it than me, plus likes the part time work and extra money.”

He ignores all I said and mutters, “You had to keep your mind off me?”

“Well, yeah.”

“And you only made me work for it for three days and even then, you apologized for it?” he asks me something he already knows.

“I didn’t make you work that hard, I was sleeping in your bed and cleaning your house,” I argue.

“Yeah, but you had me worried,” he admits.

“See, Rosa was right,” I say, rolling my eyes back before muttering, “I’m so not a lady.”

I feel him shaking on me and when I look to him, he’s doing the silent laughing thing.

“What?” I ask.

“You’re not a lady?” he chuckles.

“You know what I mean,” I mutter.

His laughter dies and he dips his face close to say, “Well, whatever you are, Paige Elizabeth Carpino, you’re perfect for me.  And you’re also finally mine.  Not one thing about that’s going to change.”

And then Campbell Montgomery, the football player slash cowboy slash smarty pants math teacher slash coach slash hot dad, kissed me crazy.  And since we had an early to bed night, there was still time for more fun.