Chapter Fifteen

“YOU SHOULD HAVE told me.” Tanner slammed his palm against the eight-top table he occupied at the lodge along with most of his supposed friends. Hawk was conspicuously missing.

“Everything okay over here?” Nugget, the cook and owner stopped by to refill waters and iced teas. “Y’all seem tense.”

“We’re great,” Colby said with a hint of a smile. “We’re here to celebrate the birth of Tanner and Jenny’s baby girl.”

“I was real happy to hear you two worked things out. Any chance of reopening the fishing lodge? Not a day goes by that someone around here doesn’t bellyache about missing it.”

“Afraid not,” Tanner said. “I’m probably heading back to the fire station. It’s satisfying work.” If Tanner told himself the standard line long enough, he might one day believe it. Until then, he could hardly stomach building Jenny a fire in their hearth. He didn’t want to see fire or smell it or hear about the devastation it caused. He knew far too much about it firsthand.

“That’s a shame,” Nugget said. “But congrats on that baby. Bring her and Jenny by for supper. On the house.”

“Thanks,” Tanner said. “I know she’ll like that.”

Once Nugget passed through swinging doors to the kitchen, Tanner eyed each and every person at that table with disdain.

“You all are my family. How could you keep this from me?”

“How could we not?” Rose asked. “Think about it? By the time Hawk told Brody and he confided in everyone else, it was never the right time. You were recovering and Jenny was in a coma. We couldn’t risk you learning this news, then falling into a depression that might have hurt your rehab. Once Jenny woke, we all breathed easier, assuming she’d tell you. But then we learned about this whole amnesia thing and we knew we were really screwed. We all held our breath that night when she kissed Hawk. I don’t know why he didn’t at least tell her everything when he had her alone. You have to believe none of us ever set out to purposely hurt you.”

“We love you, man.” Brody’s expression was sincere. “No matter how this turns out, someone’s going to get hurt.”

Please, God, don’t let that someone be me…

Tanner’s phone dinged, signaling he’d gotten an email. He opened the app. His stomach fisted when he read the subject heading from the lab: Muldoon/Stark Paternity Test Results.

“Is that it?” Colby asked.

Patrick glanced over Tanner’s shoulder. “Yep.”

Lilianna reached for Tanner’s phone. “Let me read it.”

Tanner gladly handed it over.

At first, she was silent, then he witnessed tears pool in her eyes, spilling over onto her cheeks. “Oh, Tanner…”

She backed out of her chair, dashing around the table, crushing him in a backwards hug.

“What does that mean?” Rose asked, snatching the phone to skim the letter herself. “Oh. Oh, no…”

Forcing a deep breath, Tanner said, “Let me guess, I’m not the father of my wife’s baby?”

Rose shook her head.

“IT’S ABOUT TIME, you got back. I was—oh, Hawk. I was expecting Tanner. Not that I’m not happy to see you, but…” Jenny smiled. “Tanner left for lunch with the gang a few hours ago. He should have been back by now.

“I get it.”

“Did you see our baby? I swear, she’s already got her daddy wrapped around her pinkie finger. Tanner practically glows when he sees her. His whole face lights up. And his eyes…” She felt a cheesy grin coming on. “I love when his pale eyes sparkle.”

Hawk cleared his throat.

“You look sick. Are you coming down with something? If so, you should probably leave. The nurse took the baby for her bath and to spend time under her sunlamp to prevent jaundice.”

“I heard. I sat with her—the baby—in the nursery.”

“That’s nice, but…” She narrowed her gaze. “I thought they only allowed immediately family to visit?”

“Jenny…” His voice was hoarse. “We need to talk.”

“I-is something wrong with Tanner? Why do you look so sad?”

He tipped his head back, rubbing his palms over his whisker-stubbled cheeks. “Where do I even start?”

“You start with my husband. Is he okay?”

“Yes—physically, he’s fine. But I think I know the reason why you lost your memory. You’ve—we’ve—been keeping something from him that we can no longer hide.”

“What are you talking about? You said yourself that the two of us were awful together.”

“Look, I’m just going to say it. Your baby? She’s mine—not Tanner’s. I told him I was prepared to give her up. Sign her away to be raised by both of you, but after holding her, I realized I can’t do that. My whole life I’ve searched for something—someone—to ground me. To make me stop taking stupid risks with my life and—”

“Shut. Up. I don’t care about your touchy-feely lies. What in the world are you rambling about? I haven’t been with anyone besides my husband.”

“You’re wrong. Before Christmas, you and I shared quite a goodbye before you left San Diego to come up here. You and Tanner were divorced—at least, you believed you were. Soon after, you must have been with him, too, because you called to let me know you were pregnant and either myself or Tanner was the father. When you kissed me at your Welcome Home party, I came damned close to letting our secret slip, but you thankfully missed my mistake. The thing is, none of that matters. Your baby is also my baby. I know I told you I’ll never be a family man, but what if this is fate’s way of telling me I need to try? Divorce Tanner like you’d originally planned and marry me. We’ll raise our baby together. Move back to San Diego. We’ll be close to the beach and your family so your mom and sister can babysit on date nights.”

During the entirety of Hawk’s speech, Jenny’s head pounded from the inside in time with her thundering heart. She felt dizzy and sick and above all, she felt overwhelmed from the rushing tide of memories accosting her from all directions. She and Tanner’s wedding. Their lovemaking. Their legendary fights. Makeup sex. More fights. Missing him desperately when he was gone on missions. Loving him fiercely when he came home. Moving to Alaska and feeling isolated and alone. Fearing losing him, first from the fishing lodge, and then again to his job at the fire station. When she’d broached the subject of divorce, she never believed he’d follow through. She’d meant it as a warning shot across his stubborn Navy SEAL bow. But he’d not only called her bluff, but upped the ante. Within days, he’d found a lawyer and officially filed.

She’d returned to San Diego believing herself a divorced woman—something she never wanted to be.

She’d consoled herself by indulging in a rebound fling with Hawk—the one guy on Tanner’s former team that she knew he couldn’t stand. When she found out the divorce wasn’t final after all, she’d seen it as fate’s way of calling her home to Tanner. When she learned she was pregnant, she took the news as an unmistakable sign that they were meant to always be together. She’d told Hawk there was a remote possibility the baby could be his as a courtesy.

Never in a million years did she believe it could be true.

“You’re awfully quiet,” Hawk said. “Do you need anything? Crackers? Water?”

I need my husband.

“I realize this is a lot to take in, but think about it,” Hawk said. “We’ve always been hot in bed. But maybe there’s more? Now that we share a baby, don’t you think we owe it to ourselves to try?”

“Leave.” Using her fingertips, she rubbed circles atop her throbbing temples. “Please, just leave.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. We have a lot to discuss.”

“Leave! I love Tanner. I want to be with Tanner. If you want to help raise our child, I can’t stop you, and will always welcome you to have a meaningful relationship with your daughter. In the same respect, I hope you’ll understand that I’m married. My husband will also play a pivotal role in Mckynley’s life.”

In her peripheral vision, Jenny caught a movement by the door. Tanner.

“H-how long have you been here?” she asked.

“Long enough. Hawk, I can’t fault you for trying, but if you don’t mind, I need time alone with my wife.”

Hawk bowed his head. “You got it, man. No hard feelings?”

“I’m working on it.”

Once Hawk left, shutting the door behind him, Jenny sharply exhaled. “I remember everything. I was terrified of telling you Hawk might be the father. I couldn’t bear the thought of losing you all over again.”

“Never going to happen.” He went to her side, lowering her bedrail to perch on the mattress alongside her, drawing her into his arms. “For a hot minute, I contemplated being the bigger man and letting Hawk have you and the baby, but then I said, screw that. I know it’s politically uncool for a guy to tell a woman she belongs to you, but that’s how much I love you, Jen. You’re mine. Always have been, always will be. Understood?”

Grinning, she nodded. “It’s kind of hot—being claimed.”

“Good. I’m glad you like it because I’m here to stay.”

“Mmm…” She leaned forward to kiss him, to find home in his taste. “Tell me how it’s going to be, sailor.”

“It’s going to be perfect. Forever. We’ll share Mckynley’s custody and Lord willing have plenty more little ones of our own. Sound like a plan?”

“The perfect plan.”

“Knock knock…” The room’s door opened and in walked the nurse, pushing the baby in her clear acrylic cart. “Someone misses her momma and daddy.”

When the nurse left after placing the baby in Tanner’s arms, Jenny asked, “Are you really okay with sharing? It’s not always going to be easy.”

“Sure it will.” He gazed at her with tears shining in his eyes. “What little girl wouldn’t want to be adored by two proud papas?” After leaning in for a kiss, he added, “As for our little girl’s mother? She’d better be content with one man.”

“Jamie Dornan?” she asked with a sassy wink and smile.

Tanner growled before kissing her again. “I think I preferred Jenny 2.0.”

“Tough. Consider me fully updated and much more user friendly.”

Deepening their kiss, his growl transformed to a groan. “How long do we have to wait until—you know?”

“S-E-X? Six, agonizing weeks.”

“I’ll never make it.”