CHAPTER THIRTY
Brand
The sun was barely up. Cami was clinging to my side like an octopus and I loved it, even if I was hot as fuck. At some point, the sheets had been thrown off and I now had a full view of her perfect, naked body.
“Is it that time already?” her words were muffled against my chest. Her voice was raw and sad. I wondered if she’d slept at all last night.
I had a good idea that this was going to be a bit hard for her. Not just the fact that I had to go and would be gone a few days, but what I was actually doing while I was gone. Though, she didn’t know what exactly this run was because she had made it a point to let me know more than once, that she didn’t want to know, but she wasn’t stupid. Even if the words hadn’t been said, she got it.
No amount of reassuring her that it would be fine seemed to help. And I thought I’d worn her out enough the night before that she’d just pass out, but by the dark circles under her eyes, I could see my plan had failed.
“Come here,” I said as I hauled her up my body and kissed her. “There’s nothing to worry about. I’ll be back in a few days.”
“I know,” she whispered. “I’m just not sure how I’m supposed to handle this you know? Like what do other girlfriends…or…old ladies I guess, do?”
Clearly, someone had been filling her in on all the club stuff she didn’t know about. I could admit I loved her naivety to the whole thing. I hadn’t bothered to break the old lady thing down simply because we were us, and sure, I wanted everyone to know it, but I knew I didn’t have to go throwing around some title for everyone around us to get it.
“Keep busy. Gwen is here. Chris is here. And you could go hang out with Laurel. Don’t think about it and before you know it, I’ll be back. There really is nothing to worry about.”
“Okay,” she agreed with a nod.
I kissed her one last time, then dragged her tired ass into the shower with me to give her a proper goodbye. Then I grabbed my stuff and headed for the door.
“A few days. I’ll call you, I promise,” I said, flashing her my dimples in hopes of distracting her from all the thoughts in her head.
“I’ll…I’ll miss you.” I didn’t like the hesitation in her voice like she was afraid to tell me how she felt.
Fuck that. If she was going to miss me then I for damn sure wanted to hear it.
“I’ll miss you, too,” I said, the honesty in the statement was at one million percent. “I love you.”
I ducked down and kissed her one last time.
“When I get back, we should look for an apartment.”
I could tell by the shocked look on her face that I’d taken her by surprise.
“Like, for us?”
“Yes, baby, for us. I want to move in with you and have a real place to call ours. One where I don’t have to worry about Ky banging on the wall because we’re disrupting his sleep or whatever.”
“Yeah, okay.” She flashed me the biggest smile I’d ever seen.
“I’ll call you tonight,” I said as I turned on my heels and all but forced my feet to take me away from her.
The whole ride there I let my mind get lost. I could see the future with Cami and it looked fucking amazing. I tried not to let my past make me question things. I wanted marriage and babies and all that with Cami and I was going to make it happen come Hell or high water. The boy in me wanted to throw my past relationships in my face. The fact that I’d once wanted all the same things with someone and it turned out my relationship had been a giant joke. But all it took was one look into Cami’s eyes and I knew, every damn time, that I was all she thought about. I was the only man she saw. And it was the same for me when I looked at her.
Feeling the miles fly by under my tires was always the best thing. I’d never get enough of taking long trips on my bike. I hoped that one day I would get to finish my cross-country tour. Maybe not all in one go, but I’d still love to see all the places I was going to go with my dad. I felt like I needed to do it to honor him. Maybe I could take Cami, share that part of me with her even more.
I couldn’t help but think that maybe this was the way that it was all supposed to turn out. Part of me wanted to go as far as to say this was some kind of slip of fate. That my dad’s death had led me to this very point in my life. That he’d been the one responsible for guiding me to Cami. Maybe it was a bit silly, but I didn’t care. If it made this thing more epic, then fuck it, I was going to go with it. Because I believed that Cami and I deserved epic.
As we pulled off into Moon Hill I was hit with a wave of emotions. It felt good to be back and I was excited to see everyone. As I parked my bike, I thought about everything that had happened here. I wasn’t that man anymore. Wilmington. The shop. Cami. All those things had changed me. And I wasn’t saying it was a bad thing.
We rode straight to the back of the compound and switched things off, then a handful of the head chapter brothers were off to handle the deal a few counties over.
“Good to see you, brother,” Loch said as soon as my boots crossed over the threshold to the clubhouse.
I was hit with a wave of nostalgia. The smell. The look. Even Dane sitting on the couch watching shitty action movies and Seven sitting at the corner of the bar, watching everyone but not looking like he was. It was all the same. Like no time had passed at all.
“You too, brother,” I said as we shook hands and he surprised me by pulling me in for a quick hug and clap on the back.
“She’s excited to see you,” he said taking me by surprise.
We hadn’t talked about what went down all those years ago. Loch wasn’t much of a talker, to begin with. I’d tried to keep my distance the best I could and I could tell he was more standoffish around me. I wasn’t sure if it was because he didn’t trust me after everything that had happened, but he had no reason not to.
Simply put, Reagan was, and always will be, his.
Not that I wished it any differently.
“Let’s go. Ethel’s cookin’ dinner and she’s expectin’ you now,” he said when he picked up on the fact that I was at a loss for words. “Meet you over there.”
And so, I headed to Ethel’s without another thought. The front door opened the moment my bike turned into the driveway.
There was Reagan, looking beautiful as ever, carrying little Maddy on her hip. Both girls greeted me with huge smiles as I stepped off my bike.
“Hi,” Reagan breathed out, pulling me in for a one-armed hug because her other one was full of baby and all. It didn’t mean that it felt any less warm.
“Hey,” I said and it felt like all the tension and questions I’d held onto about her escaped with a breath.
While her touch was warm and comforting, it was just that. Like eating grandma’s cookies fresh out of the oven.
There was nothing beyond that. No electricity shooting through my veins at her touch. No flutter in my belly as I met her eyes. No unexplained extra beats of my heart.
All the things that I got when I was around Cami.
“You alright?” Reagan asked a half smile on her face. I imagined my face must have been stuck in some weird half-dazed expression.
“Yeah,” I said, pulling a full smile. “Perfect.”
“You met her, didn’t you?”
She didn’t know anything about Cami, well not unless Chris had talked to her, but by the way she phrased the question, I would have guessed not.
“Yep. I definitely have.” I said without a second of hesitation.
“Good. It’s about fucking time.” There was no lingering sadness in her answer and I knew it was genuine. “Now, give your little niece some love.”
As she said those words, I was lifting Maddy out of Reagan’s arms and rubbing my nose back and forth against her cute, tiny, button one. She was so squishy and cute. Her big eyes a burst of colors just like her mother. Her barely-there hair was the color of Loch’s. She was so adorable I almost couldn’t stand it.
“Brand, get your ass in here so I can pinch it,” Ethel called out from the front door. “It’s been far too long. Got to make sure you haven’t gone soft on me.”
I laughed.
And it felt wonderful.
“It’s good to see you,” Ethel said as she wrapped me up in her arms, then slid one hand down to pinch my ass. I knew it was coming. That woman never did play around with her threats.
We sat and ate. Ethel’s pot roast was on point. I had missed her meals, that was for sure. I definitely didn’t eat as well down on the coast. Unless Gwen was cooking us something, it was usually take-out or cereal for me.
“Ethel, you in there?” a strange voice called through the front screen door.
“Rosemarie, come in, dear. We were just finishing up,” Ethel replied, wiping her face, placing her cloth napkin on the table, and rising to her feet. “Did you eat? Would you like some roast?”
“Oh, sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt.”
She was tall and thin, from what I could tell under her scrubs. Her long, dark brown hair was straight and pulled back away from her face in a low ponytail. I would have guessed she had some Italian in her by her features and tan skin. And by her prominent cheekbones and almond shaped eyes, I would have said that she had some Asian in her, too. She was pretty and it was clear by her fresh face that she didn’t need any makeup.
“Hi.” Her brow furrowed as her head cocked to the side slightly. “I don’t know you.”
“Brand,” I said getting to my feet and holding out my hand.
“He used to be here, but he left us to go hang out at the beach all day. I guess I can see the appeal, all those hotties in barely-there bikinis and all. This is Rosemarie. She does my STD tests for me here, so I don’t have to drive all the way to the city.”
And there was the Ethel I knew and loved.
“Nice to meet you,” I said with a smile because Ethel was just Ethel and you couldn’t be embarrassed about anything around her.
“You, too,” she said as she shook my hand. After giving me a sweet smile, she turned her attention back to Ethel. “I’ll leave these here for you. Every thing’s good. I’ll see you later.”
“Wait,” Ethel called coming out of the kitchen carrying a Tupperware container full of cookies. “Take these to Bocca. Tell him I said to share this time.”
“I will,” Rosemarie said with a laugh. “Thanks. I’ll see you later. Later Reagan and Loch. And bye little cutie.” She bent down and kissed Maddy’s head, tossed me a wave, then was off and out the front door before my ass hit the seat again.
“We have to get going too. This one is going to get fussy if she doesn’t go to bed soon,” Reagan said as she stood and it seemed like Maddy was permanently attached to her hip.
Just one look and I knew Reagan was a good mom.
And when Loch looked at the two of them, I could tell he’d finally found his happiness. His home. That hole that was in his heart from losing his parents was now filled with the love he had for Reagan and his daughter. He deserved this. He deserved her. And I knew he’d spend the rest of his days doing any and everything for them.
“Ethel, get all the details on this girl for me,” Regan said and shot me a wink.
“Girl?”
“Thanks for that,” I mumbled as I gave her and Maddy a hug at the same time. Then I kissed Maddy’s chubby cheek.
Loch chuckled and slapped me on the shoulder.
“See you before you head off,” he said as he shook his head and gave me a look that said ‘good fucking luck with that.’
The door hadn’t even shut behind Loch before Ethel was on me with the questions. All of them. From wanting to know every little detail about what Cami looked like, down to how we met, and of course, she asked about the sex. The last subject, I skipped the details and simply told her that I’d never want for another ever.
I made it back to the clubhouse just in time for the long day to catch up to me. I didn’t hang out long, but I wanted to at least seem a little social. Then, I called my beauty before I went to sleep. By the sound of her slurred speech and the over giddiness in her voice, I knew she was having a good time. The only reason I didn’t worry about her was that I heard Chris and Laurel’s voice in the background. I would have bet they were hanging out at Chris’ house.
We spent half of the next day in church. We went over everything our chapter had been up to, all the things that had happened, and what we were currently dealing with. Axe filled us in on his upcoming plans and the new MCs he was bringing into the fold. We were expanding the pipeline and I was going to be a huge part of getting that up and running.
Axe was a strong leader. I had no doubt that he would take care of the club. He knew what he was doing but then again Cal had been grooming him for this for a long time.
And Cal, well I’d never seen that man more relaxed as I did right then. Not a care in the world, and a girl on each knee. It was hard not to laugh at the guy. I was happy for him. That man deserved some fun after all years he’d put in. I had no doubt that his pops would be proud with all that he’d done. Axe may not have been his blood, but it was clear Cal saw him as his son.
There was a huge gathering that night. Burgers, hot dogs, and even Dane made some of his amazing barbecue ribs. Fucking mind-blowing, and that was putting it mildly. All the old ladies were there. I got to see Ellie and the ever-growing Fate. I couldn’t believe how big she’d gotten in just the last few months it had been since I’d seen her.
Grass was running around chasing after Fate and it was the cutest thing. I may not have been there the moment everyone found out that Grass was still alive—mostly because Axe left my semi-conscious and messed up body tucked away in a room while I prayed no one would find me—but I do remember the feeling of the club once the boy came back home. And to this day, Nadya still scared the ever-loving piss out of me. I would not want to be on her bad side. Ever.
I couldn’t wait to bring Cami here, and I’d already started planning the trip in my mind. This would just be the first stop. I didn’t care that I’d be away from the shop for a while and I had no doubt that Iron would let me go for just a little bit. Part one of our road tripping days would start soon. All I needed was my girl on the back of my bike, driving to wherever the hell we decided on.
Looking around, I could tell that life was different from when I’d first found this place. It wasn’t a bad thing. It just was. And it felt good to still be able to be a part of it all.
“Hey, you,” Reagan said walking up to me. I was sitting on the outskirts of the picnic benches, taking it all in as the sun was fading out of the sky. She was baby free, Loch having gone in to put the little one down in their room there at the compound a bit ago. And I guessed that was why I hadn’t seen him since he’d taken her away.
“Hey.”
“Things are sure different,” she said.
“Yeah. But it’s good.”
“Yeah.”
The comfortable silence hung around us for a long moment, both of us staring out at the people that made our wild, crazy, and wonderful adopted family.
“I never did thank you for everything—”
“No need,” I cut her off. “You shouldn’t have had to go through that, and I hate that you did, but I was glad I was there for you.”
“I was such a mess.” I could hear the sadness in her voice.
“And who would blame you. What happened wasn’t your fault—I shouldn’t need to tell you that, but I am. The thing that got me the most, was after you fell—after you broke down, you picked yourself back up. You have the most beautiful strength in you. And I’m lucky to have been there to see you rise after it all.”
“You amaze me, you know that?”
“Oh, yeah?” I raised a brow and flashed her a twinge of a cocky smile. She laughed, which was what I was going for.
“Fucking dimples. I swear.” She shook her head, huge smile still plastered on her face. “She’s a lucky fucking woman.”
I didn’t have to ask to know she was talking about Cami.
“Nah, I’m the lucky one.”
“Such a damn sap,” she said then bumped me playfully with her shoulder. “You’re a good friend and I’m so happy for you. Now we just need to find someone for Chris.”
“Isn’t that the damn truth.” We laughed and everything felt right with the world.
I had no idea when I rode up here that I would get some of the closure that I hadn’t even been aware that I needed. Not only closure, but a new direction for my future. Things had shifted but I couldn’t have felt more settled as I climbed on my bike the next day and drove away and headed home.