Chapter Twenty-Three
Luke walked up to the front door of Krish's house, knocked, and waited for someone to answer. He'd been surprised, but happy when Krish had asked him to come over. They hadn't arranged anything.
Simon answered the door and beckoned Luke inside. "He's upstairs in his room."
Luke nodded and walked upstairs. When he was outside Krish's bedroom door, he knocked then walked in. "Hey." He smiled seeing Krish lying on his bed.
"Hi."
Krish stood up and walked over to him, bending down to kiss him. Luke kicked the door shut behind him and leaned up, threading his fingers through Krish's hair. Pushing his tongue against Krish's lips, Luke moaned when Krish opened them, and Luke's tongue slipped in.
Pushing them towards the bed, Luke gripped Krish's hair, pulling his head to one side to deepen the kiss.
"Wait," Krish panted, pulling his lips away.
Luke loosened his grip, frowning up at Krish. When he noticed Krish was avoiding his eyes and biting his bottom lip, he asked, "What's wrong?"
"We need to talk."
Luke paused, stomach rolling. He swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry. "What?" He wasn't sure he wanted to know.
"I've been stupid."
"Why? What's happened?" Luke asked, walking them over to the bed and sitting down. He took Krish's hands in his, surprised by how cold they felt.
"My parents. I told them."
"Told them what? About us?"
"Yeah, they want to meet you."
"Oh, okay. I've never met anybody's parents before."
"No, you don't understand."
Luke frowned. So, he was going to meet Krish's parents. He was nervous, his stomach churned and developed a bad case of butterflies, but he'd manage.
Krish twisted on the bed, so he was facing Luke. "I told them about you."
Luke swallowed hard, leaning back. Sweat broke out over his skin. What? Krish told them what? "What did you say?"
"I told them about you being in foster care and that you had to leave. They were asking questions and my Dad... I told them, Luke."
Luke opened and closed his mouth several times before he managed to whisper, "About my time on the streets?"
Krish nodded, glancing away. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," he muttered.
Luke stared at their joined hands. How could he betray his trust? Luke snatched his hands free and stood up. He paced the bedroom, continuously running his hand through his hair. Grinding his teeth together, Luke groaned out. "How could you?" His body vibrated, heat flooded through him.
"They didn't want us to be together, so I explained what happened to you. Please, Luke, I'm sorry."
Luke stopped pacing and turned to face Krish, who now had his head in his hands.
"I feel like you've betrayed me. Just when I thought I was leaving that all behind, especially after all that Sarah shit, you tell me this." Luke shook his head, his hands on his hips. "Seeya, Krish."
Luke walked towards the door, but Krish beat him to it.
"No, please. You can trust me, I promise."
"Trust you? How? We've been together a few weeks, and you've told your fucking parents!" Taking several calming, deep breaths, Luke glared at Krish. "Get the fuck out of my way."
Krish's eyes looked shiny as he shook his head at Luke. "No, Luke. Please, not like this. I know you're angry, but please understand. They don't hate you. I told them you had no choice and you'd turned your life around. They just want to meet you, and talk."
Luke shook his head. "Move, Krish. I want to go."
"Luke..."
Luke shook his head, and eventually, Krish moved out of the way. He ran from the house, not stopping until he was out of breath. When he did eventually stop, he paused, glancing at the area around him. Running a hand through his hair, Luke muttered, "Fuck."
He liked Krish, but now he felt betrayed. He felt sick, his stomach churning violently, and he bent over breathing through his mouth. A cold sweat broke out over his skin, and he moaned quietly, closing his eyes.
Fuck! Why now?
When he eventually felt like he had some control over his stomach, Luke stood up straight and walked slowly home. He couldn't face Krish and sit in his lectures. How could he? Krish had betrayed his trust in him. He shivered as a cold breeze blew past him, and he tightened his coat around him.
Why? Why? Why?
First Sarah, now this. Why couldn't his past stay there? Hadn't he suffered enough?
Eventually reaching home, Luke stopped and stood outside. Maybe he'd made a mistake staying in Manchester. Maybe he should have moved away and only come back for holidays. Sighing, Luke rubbed the back of his neck. Didn't matter now, did it?
Walking up the path, Luke let himself in and went straight to his bedroom. Throwing his coat on the bed, Luke pulled his phone from his pocket and looked at the screen. Several texts and missed calls showed from Krish.
Luke dropped face first onto his bed, still holding his phone. He didn't know what to do.
❊❊❊
It had been two weeks since Krish had last spoken to Luke. The day he'd left. He'd barely slept, barely ate. He'd fucked up. Well and truly. He'd even gone to his parents that Sunday and explained everything that had happened. His dad hadn't said anything, but his mum had told him to be patient and to give Luke time.
What did he expect? He'd betrayed Luke's trust in him. No wonder Luke had left him. After everything he'd been through with Sarah and now this? Krish snorted. Luke would probably never talk to him again, and it ate away at him.
But they were his family, and he loved him, and he knew his parents were only concerned about him. Hell, even his dad had admitted his fear over Krish's sexuality and his dad had never expressed any concern before.
Krish had no idea how to win Luke back. He didn't know what to say or do. He'd left numerous messages, but Luke hadn't responded to any. It was wearing him down. He struggled to eat, having to force the food down. He'd lost weight. His jeans were looser.
Whenever he thought about Luke, which was constantly, his stomach rolled and his chest tightened. He'd been on the verge of tears so many times over how their relationship had ended, yet their relationship had barely begun. But Luke had touched something inside of him.
Krish had wanted him for so long. Watching and waiting and he'd eventually had him. Luke was everything Krish wanted in a partner.
His past didn't bother Krish. He saw Luke and only Luke. Luke, who had accepted his submission and had even looked into it, to ensure Krish's safety.
Yeah, Krish had fucked up. Well and truly.
❊❊❊
"Okay, enough's enough."
Luke glanced up from where he sat on the sofa, seeing Tom stood next to him. "What?"
"Don't 'what' me." Tom put his hands on his hips. "What the fuck's going on?"
Luke glanced away. "Don't know what you're talking about," he mumbled.
"Don't fucking lie to me." Tom sat down next to Luke and the sofa. "What's wrong?" he asked in a quieter voice.
Luke slumped back against the sofa, closing his eyes. "It doesn't matter now."
"Yes, it does. Is it Krish? Haven't mentioned him recently."
Luke sighed, rubbing his forehead. "I finished with him."
"Why? It sounded like you liked him."
"He told his parents about my past." Luke opened his eyes and looked at Tom. "Some bullshit excuse that they were concerned for him."
Tom shrugged. "Maybe they were."
Luke's eyebrows shot up. "What? You're defending him?"
Tom sighed. "Not everyone's parents were like mine. Some are more open-minded. Is he close to them?"
Luke shrugged. "Seems to be. He sees them often and has mentioned brothers and sisters a few times."
"Maybe he was telling you the truth then. Maybe he was forced into it. I don't fuckin' know. Mine and Seb's are homophobic cunts. Krish's parents know he's gay, and still love him, right?"
Luke nodded, frowning. "Yeah, they're close."
"Tom has a point," Seb said as he walked into the living room. "Look what we've been through the past three years with my parents. Yet Krish's have accepted his sexuality, and they want to meet you. Maybe they could be genuinely concerned for their son."
Luke nodded again, watching Seb as he sat down. He could see the sadness in Seb's expression. Even though he and his parents didn't agree with his relationship with Tom, it didn't mean that Seb had stopped loving them.
Even when Josh had told them about him and Matt, Seb had still tried. It was only recently that he'd stopped and Luke could see how much it hurt him.
Yes, Seb and Josh's parents were wrong in their treatment of gays, but they were still Seb's parents.
"I'm sorry," Luke muttered.
Seb gave him a small, sad smile. "It isn't your fault. I wouldn't change any of the past. I have Tom, and I'm not letting him go."
"Good," Tom muttered. "Not fuckin' going anywhere. You're stuck with me."
Luke watched the way they looked at each other and smiled slightly to himself. He wanted that too.
"Talk to him, Luke. Don't make a mistake you'll regret."
"Yeah, Luke, don't fuck it up."
Luke chuckled. Even after three years plus together, he could tell them apart simply by the way they spoke. Yes, Seb didn't swear as much, but occasionally one would slip out.
"You know, you'll have to watch your language when you're in court," Seb advised Tom.
Tom snorted. "I'll manage."
"Maybe we should get a swear box," Luke added, smiling at Tom.
"Fuck that. I'd be broke!"
Both Seb and Luke laughed as Tom smiled ruefully. When he stopped, Luke sighed. He didn't know what to do for the best. First Sarah, now Krish. But he did know one thing. Even though they hadn't been together long, Luke missed Krish far more than he ever did Sarah.
"Talk to him, Luke. Don't fuck it up." Tom stood and placed a hand on Luke's shoulder, squeezing him tight. "You know where we are."
Luke nodded and watched Seb and Tom leave the living room. Sitting back on the sofa, Luke thought over what they had said to him. Had he overreacted? They'd had sex a couple of times. Luke snorted. Sex aside, they had talked or texted pretty much every day, except for these past two weeks, and he missed him. He'd been on Luke's mind constantly.
Sure, he'd seen him at Uni, and it had hurt, every single fucking time. He could see Krish wasn't doing well. He'd looked ill, thinner too.
Luke constantly thought about that day in Krish's bedroom, and he knew, in hindsight and with Tom and Seb's advice, that he needed to resolve this.
Thinking back on all the conversations they'd had together, Krish had always mentioned someone from his family. They were close. Luke knew this, yet when it counted, he'd ignored it and had walked away.
Even though the relationship was new, Luke knew it would have lasted. A gut feeling, maybe.
Krish had been open and honest about his needs, especially in the bedroom, leaving himself vulnerable. He'd trusted Luke with that part of him. But still, Luke felt betrayed. His past was that--the past. He didn't want to have to relive it. It was over and done with.
Sighing, Luke closed his eyes. He didn't know what to do. He wanted Krish, but was afraid. Krish's parents knew about him--about his past. From what Krish had said, they'd wanted to meet him. Wanted to make sure he was good enough for their son, Luke guessed.
Luke had never had that. A loving family who accepted you for who you were. He'd had one foster home after another until he and Matt had run away. Then it was merely a case of surviving.
Luke sighed. He wished he knew what to do.