I open my eyes, remembering how the night ended with a smile. Everything about Victoria seems to light up every nerve ending in my body. I’m even dreaming about her. It’s sheer insanity.

She’d loved talking about work, she’d loved talking about her day, she’d loved dinner, I couldn’t imagine a more perfect evening. Even now, the thought of going back to coming home to just Jax makes my chest ache like someone smashed a sledgehammer into my ribs and crushed my chest cavity.

It’s agony.

I hear a sigh behind me and my smile widens. Things are just weird. Everything has changed so much in only a little over a week. And even more stranger; it’s hard to remember how I lived my life before. All I can think about is now. It’s like life before Victoria didn’t exist.

I roll over in bed. And am met by a warm, wet tongue covering my nose and mouth in a layer of saliva.

“Damn it Jax,” I say, pushing him away. He begins to give me that little howl that tells me I over slept while standing up like he’s going to jump on me in a playful – and slimy, drool-filled - attack.

I get out of bed and pull on some clean clothes. Jax bounces around my feet like some happy, insane artic fox diving in the snow for mice.

“Okay, okay,” I tell him, leaving my room. I spot Victoria in the kitchen. She offers me a glass and I thank her for making breakfast. She’s gotten used to my routine of smoothies for breakfast and she’s getting better at deciding what flavors go and which ones don’t.

I have to admit, a chia seed lemonade smoothie might be the weirdest thing I ever put in my mouth. But she’s got it down now, I think, and there’s still that experimental nature in her personality that I find endearing.

I take a sip, enjoying the burst of flavors. With Jax on my heels, I open the back door and he rushes out right to his favorite bush.

“I was going to let him out this morning when I got up, but he ran right to your room,” she says, mischief in her pretty brown eyes.

“Yeah, he decided to bathe my face for me,” I say, remembering that I wanted to go wash the gross off. I set my glass down and head to the kitchen sink to rub some antibacterial soap on the spots he’d licked.

“Aww, don’t wash it off,” she says, her voice coming from very near my elbow. “It’s his way of saying he loves you.”

“Is that why he licks his balls and butthole?” I ask, amused by her line of thinking. “I don’t want all that on my face.”

She giggles and I rinse my face off. Her fingers touch my cheek and wipe off a bit of soap I missed. “Here,” she says, her voice husky as I run the water over my skin where she touched. She moves to the other side and touches my cheekbone and temple. “Here,” she says again, this time her voice barely more than a whisper.

My body, seriously turned on by her touches, begs me to touch her. It had taken every last bit of strength I had last night to walk away, to not give her what her eyes had been begging me for. And I wanted to. With every ounce of my being, I wanted to take everything she was silently offering.

But I’m already in too deep.

I dry my face off and look at her over the towel. She’s studying me, her face alight with wonder. “Thank you for breakfast,” I say, unable to keep my hands to myself. I pull her in close and press my lips to hers. And it feels as natural as breathing to have her here, this close, her lips moving under mine like she can’t get enough.

How did everything come to this? How did we go from strangers who didn’t really like one another to this feeling I have of needing her?

“Thank you for desert,” she says, her breath cooling my damp lips. Her lips taste sweeter than the smoothie she’d made me this morning, and more like home than this kitchen feels.

And everything in me hits the brakes. I need to stop this. I need to remember she’s going to be walking away in a few weeks. I can’t have this complication in my life.

Jax rushes back in, his tail beating at our legs as he winds around Victoria. She releases me to kneel and give him loves. “Feel better, mister?” she asks him and he gives her his little husky howl that communicates his pleasure.

“I bet you do!” She scratches him behind the ears and he tucks his chin to his chest to give her better access. When she looks back up at me from this kneeling position, my body instantly snaps back to attention. Fuck. Why does this keep happening?

“What are your plans today?” she asks, her gaze darting to my cock before back up to mine with more than a hint of shock.

I want her so bad.

“I need to get out of here,” I say, backing off a step. It’s leave or do something we both might regret.

She’s quick to get to her feet, a look of worry twisting her pretty face. “Want me to come with?” She asks, and I shake my head.

Some time alone will do me good. It’ll remind me how things were before her. It’ll be the conformation I need that I can go back to being alone once she picks up and moves on with her life and her healed dog. Because she will. She’ll live her life with Sentinel, and I’ll be here with Jax.

“What did I miss?” she asks, wiping her palms on her jeans. There’s a look of panic in her face and I know I need to talk her down.

Or do I?

Maybe instead of being a nice guy, I need to go back to being the man she thought I was at first. The asshole. I never should have stopped being that man. Because the look in her eyes hurts more than her leaving will.

So I opt for truth, without regard to her feelings. Like the Kyle I am, not the Kyle she thinks I am. “I can’t do this anymore,” I say, gesturing to the space between us. “I need to get away from this. From you,” I clarify.