Carson didn’t know what to do. He knew she would be livid. Just like he knew she was going to think he had killed Argo himself. Once she heard her cousin was dead, it was like a switch went off, and he didn’t think she even heard anything after that. She made this noise that sounded like she was screaming inside her mouth, and there was nothing he wanted to do more in that moment than to comfort her, but she wouldn’t stay still long enough for him to catch up with her.

 

When she locked herself inside the bathroom, he didn’t know what she was planning to do. The screaming that she was muffling in her mouth turned into full blown screams and crying a few minutes after she closed the door. He didn’t think she’d hurt herself, but the thought did cross his mind. In the time that he’d known her, he’d learned how special Argo was to her and sometimes he would cringe just thinking that he was going to end the man’s life for a job. Death happened. Sometimes to the most deserving people, but when you did it for hire, you didn’t even have a problem with the person. It was just business. Before now that was just fine by him, but now he didn’t know how he felt about it.

 

Sitting by the door of the bathroom made him feel helpless. He’d knocked a few times when she got quiet and told her if she didn’t say anything he was going to call the police. Both times she threw something at the door. At least she was okay even if she apparently wasn’t talking to him.

 

After a few hours the door opened, and he wasn’t sure if he was going to be good or bad, but when he finally saw her face he knew the end result wasn’t going to be the one he was hoping for.

 

“I’ve called my father’s people, and they are coming to pick me up.” She didn’t even look him in the face as she said it. It was like she was a robot, and all her emotions were shut down. He understood that, but he wished she would just hear him out.

 

“How long until they’re here?” He took a step toward her, and she moved around him to start loading up all her items.

 

“They should be here shortly so I don’t think you should stay. If they know what happened, and I know that they do, this night will be your last.”

 

“I was trying to explain myself when you went into the bathroom, but I don’t think you could hear me. My side of this story has to be told. I don’t care what your family thinks or what my company thinks, but I want you to know the truth.”

 

She was normally a methodical neat freak who liked everything in its place, but now she was throwing things into bags randomly. He moved to sit next to the suitcase where she was tossing everything when she suddenly stopped.

 

“I don’t really care about your truth because the truth won’t bring my Argo back. You and the people you set yourself up with killed off one of the best human beings I’ve ever known. I can’t even look at you without knowing that if you didn’t enter my life, I may have my cousin back. All my life I’ve tried to live a nonviolent and normal life because I didn’t understand how people could want to harm other people.” She stopped to look up at him finally, but when she did he wished she hadn’t. There was a fierce disgust in her face, and it was like he was a child again back in foster care. She wished he was never born just like everyone else he’d ever run across that he took time to know.

 

“I know that, Kelli,” he said quietly because he knew that hurt people… hurt other people, and he was definitely the target for her wrath.

 

“But did you know that you’ve helped me understand it all. My father and his boys, my cousin and his underlings… they all have rage. It burns inside of them leaving a path that desires to be filled with ugly things… like revenge, destruction, and hate. I feel that now… I understand that now, and I’m praying that it won’t over take me. I want you dead… in this moment if I had a gun, there wouldn’t have been a question that you would have taken your last breath on the same night as your victim.”

 

She looked so sad as she explained her feelings to him, and he’d never heard it put that way. It wasn’t like he didn’t know what she was talking about. He lived his life with that feeling, and until he met her, he didn’t know how it felt to be without the monster that lived within him. That thing that made him want to fight, destroy, and fuck anything and everything that had a wet pussy and was willing. Kelli soothed that beast in him, but in turn he made her take on the ugly dragon that ruled his world. He’d destroyed her, and just like he couldn’t bring Argo back, he wasn’t going to be able to fix the fury that beat within her heart.

 

“I won’t stoop to your level, but I want you out of my life. I want you out of my sight and I’m giving you this one last reprieve. Leave before my family gets here. This is the only way I’m going to believe that this night hasn’t made me into the death machine that you are.” She turned back to her suitcase where she finished throwing her clothes and items in with haste.

 

“Kelli?” He didn’t even know what he could say to her, but he didn’t want to leave it like this.

 

“Don’t make me sorry I didn’t let my family clear up this mess. I want to be a decent human being… that’s all I ever wanted. Even though I came from shitty stock, I thought that I could make a good defense for nature over nurture and be the rose that broke through the garbage to bloom and be fruitful, but I can see that science is right and the fruit doesn’t fall far from the tree. I’m shit too. Thanks for helping me find that out. I probably should be grateful, but I just am not.”

 

He stood there for a few more minutes hoping that something brilliant that would make her see that she was wrong about herself. She was one of the best women he’d ever met who always saw the best of everyone. She didn’t look like she was going to be believing anything he had to say. Was it odd that she’d want to be away from him? No, but he’d hoped she’d sleep on it and be able to hear his side of things first thing in the morning. This would probably be the last time he saw her, and he was pissed about that, but things happened, and he knew that it didn’t matter how he felt about things. If someone didn’t want you around, they were going to make sure you knew about it.

 

“They should be pulling up any minute. You need to think very carefully about the next move you make here. My family doesn’t like you for whatever they presume you did to make me change and pick a stranger over family, but now that Argo is dead, the time for talking is over. Capishe?” She didn’t even look at him with that drawn out rationale for why he needed to stop standing there and get going, but it didn’t feel over. His intuition could be wrong when it wanted to be, he guessed.

 

He walked over to get the rest of his clothes and threw them on. “I know you’re not in the mood to hear me, but if ever you want to know what happened tonight I’ll be willing to tell you. No one else, but you. I will.” He scribbled down the phone number he kept at his home and hoped that one day soon she would call it. Placing it in her purse, he closed it and walked out the door. He wasn’t going to beg anyone to be there for him or to trust him. He knew no one thought he was trustworthy, and he knew the end result of trying to force something that wasn’t meant to be. It had been like a television show while he was with her… friendly… inviting… unreal, and he loved each and every minute of it. He wasn’t sure he deserved all that he was getting when he was with her, but damned if he was going to turn it down.

 

Taking the steps quickly he threw his duffle bag over his shoulder and went over to his bike. It didn’t take long to strap everything up and be ready to go. Unfortunately, he didn’t want to go. He looked up to the window where their room had been hoping to see something… a shadow of her frantically packing or her in the window flipping him the bird, but what he did see made him wish he’d been denied anything. There was a shadow that he could make out, and it was of her crouched down on the floor. It looked like she was crying so hard that her body was wracked with heaving sobs. Fuck.

 

He couldn’t leave her like that. There had to be a way he could stand around and make sure she got picked up. He wheeled his bike to the other side of the house behind a wall where he couldn’t be seen from the road. It didn’t take long for the troops to come rolling in, and they came in like there was a war to be fought. Most of the men stayed in the cars but what looked like a father and a few other guys got out.

 

The door opened, and Kelli walked out of the house like she was a regal princess. He could see the dirty look her father was giving her, but since nothing was done, Carson would have to be comfortable with the fact that she was safe with people who loved her… minus Argo.

 

It didn’t take long for them all to let the lead car back out and the others follow suit, and he knew he should be counting his lucky stars that no one saw him and that he didn’t try to take off when he was going to… he would have ran right into them on the road, and he wouldn’t have to worry about getting another chance at her or anything else. His chances would be done and so would he.

 

Waiting a few more minutes, he pulled out of the place where his bike was hidden and started his bike. With one last look up at the place that had been his residence and dream life, he took off into the night trying not to think about what was going on with Kelli.