“Stop fidgeting! You look hot!” Ali nudges Melissa in the back when she stalls outside the door of the bar.
She looks down at herself, suddenly uncertain. After pulling virtually everything out of her closet, she’d gone back to the first outfit she’d tried on. So here she was, in skinny black leather pants and an off-the-shoulder grey t-shirt that made her eyes look even more arrestingly blue. She was rocking the biker chick look hopefully more successfully than during her first foray.
“I feel nervous as all hell.” Melissa mutters the words under her breath, as if her quiet voice will help calm the butterflies in her stomach.
“Don’t chicken out on me now, Potter.” Felicia bumps her from behind, virtually shoving her through the door of the bar.
“Alright, alright, jeez Felicia, push much?” Melissa gives the diminutive blonde behind her a look that tells her just how little she appreciates the more than gentle nudge. “You know you’re way stronger than you look.”
Felicia allows herself a little triumphant smile. “When you dance in a club, you learn to make the most of what you have.” She levels Melissa with a hard look. “Now, if you’re done trying to distract me, can we go inside?” She doesn’t wait for Melissa’s reply before she steps through the door, vanishing inside, clearly expecting the girls to follow her.
Ali nudges Melissa in the ribs with a bony elbow. “You heard the woman. I didn’t come all the way here just to admire the sturdiness of the door. So are you coming or what?” She follows Felicia’s lead, walking inside without a backward glance at Melissa.
For a few seconds Melissa entertains the idea of turning around and escaping, but the truth is that her nervousness over seeing Hawk again and what he’s going to say to her is still outweighed by how much she misses him. She takes deep breath. Come on Potter—man up. She walks through the door, almost bumping into Ali who is standing stock still looking around the bar.
“Close your mouth, Ali, before a fly goes in.” She whispers in her friend’s ear, welcoming the distraction from her own tenseness.
“Is this place for real?” Her eyes widen, and Melissa takes in the now-familiar smell of pot in the air, the leather-clad bikers making out completely brazenly in front of everyone, and the general sense of testosterone and danger that hangs about the place. To her, this has all become pretty normal in a relatively short space of time. But she can see it from Ali’s perspective, remembering her first impression of the bar.
“This is probably one of the realest places you’re ever going to be, blondie.” Josh appears out of the shadows in the skulking way that he has, looking broad as a barn.
Melissa swallows hard, nervous at what his reaction to her turning up like this is going to be. He knows that she’s a reporter and that she’d lied to them all. She’s not exactly expecting a welcoming committee. But Josh surprises her, giving her a warm smile and throwing her a wink.
“Good to see you, kid. He’s been a living nightmare since you’ve been out of the picture.” He doesn’t bother to lower his voice as he says this, and Melissa has to force herself not to look around to see if Hawk is within earshot. But Josh has already moved on. “And who’s this?” He jerks his head at Ali not in an unfriendly way.
“This is my housemate, Ali. She was curious about where I’ve been spending my time.” Melissa shrugs, not adding that Ali was mostly just there to size up Hawk and to give her best friend some much-needed moral support.
“Ah, the one from the dare.” Josh sticks his hand out for Ali to shake.
Ali flashes a questioning glance at Melissa who shakes her head almost imperceptibly. She realizes that although Josh knows the truth about her role as a reporter, he’s backing up her story in front of the other bikers. He’s throwing her a bone despite the fact that she really doesn’t deserve one. They shake hands, both sizing the other up, and eventually Josh gives her a little nod of approval, before he heads off towards the bar.
“Any drinks these ladies want are on me, Matt.” He signals to the owner working behind the bar who just nods, clearly having watched the exchange between them with interest.
“So do you see him? Is he here?” Ali nudges her friend, doing a supremely unsubtle job of searching for Hawk.
Melissa doesn’t need to look around to answer in the affirmative. The moment she’d stepped into the bar she felt his presence like a gravitational pull. She didn’t need to see him to know that he was there. She had to actively stop herself from zeroing in on him as if he were the only light in the darkness. She can’t help but wonder if he’s noticed her or if the homing beacon effect only works one way.
“Let’s get a drink.” Melissa pulls her friend towards the bar, not quite ready for a conversation with Hawk yet, not before she has a little more alcohol buzzing around her system.
“Why are you avoiding him? I thought you came here to talk to him?” Ali looks at her accusatorily.
“I did. I just need to figure out what I’m going to say. ‘Hey, sorry for totally lying to you and everyone you hold dear, but I was just doing my job’ doesn’t really seem to cut it.” Melissa signals to Matt for a couple of beers, getting his attention much faster than on her first visit to the bar. She can’t help but think that there is a lot to be said for associating with the Kings, including getting your drinks at record speed.
“Where’d Felicia go?” Melissa looks around for the little blonde who was the reason they were even there.
“She said she had some tips to collect, headed into the back.” Ali lifts her chin towards the door at the back of the room labeled ‘Office’ with a sign that looks like it’s been there since the dawn of time. “There are a lot of hot guys in this place. Who knew that a biker bar was a little treasure trove of eligible men?” Ali is taking in a group of guys sitting around a table appreciatively, before her attention is inevitably drawn to the pool table. “Holy moly, that guy knows how to wear a pair of jeans, but I wouldn’t mind seeing him without them…” Ali’s voice is husky, and Melissa feels the hackles rise on the back of her neck.
“Told you. You can’t help but notice him.” Melissa lifts her bottle to her lips, taking a long drink as Ali turns towards her, her eyes looking like they’re about to bug out of their head.
“That’s him?” Ali’s voice comes out strangled, and Melissa nudges a beer bottle towards her friend, as if that would help.
“The one and only.” Melissa doesn’t add that’s exactly what he is for her, something she’d only really taken on board when he’d walked out the door without any intention of coming back.
“Damn, Potter, no wonder you fell hard and fast.” Ali shakes her head, as if she can’t get the image of Hawk bent over the pool table out of her head. Melissa knows exactly where she’s coming from. “Not that you couldn’t do better.” Ali’s hurried back-pedaling leaves Melissa no choice but to laugh.
“Nice try, Ali, but you might want to wipe that drool off of your chin before you tell me how I’m out of his league.” Melissa shakes her head, wondering at the wisdom of coming here at all. What if he was with a girl? What if he started making out with another girl right in front of her? Just the thought of it made her want to vomit.
“Earth to Potter.” Ali waves a hand in front of Melissa’s glazed expression. “You’ve gone white as a sheet.” She gives her friend a concerned look, and Melissa blinks several times to get the image of Hawk with someone else out of her head. “And I wasn’t just trying to make you feel better. Yes, he’s all Diet Coke hot, but you’re not exactly chopped liver my statuesque friend. You could have any guy in the place.” Ali waves expansively at the room, and Melissa winces at the thought that any number of these bikers could have overheard their cringe worthy conversation.
Melissa doesn’t bother to point out that the only guy in the room that she wants is the one that doesn’t want her. It’s poetic justice or irony or a Sod’s Law or a combination of all three. Whatever it was, it sucked big time.
“Another beer please, Matt.” Melissa holds up her beer bottle that she’s managed to empty in record time, drinking through the pain.
“She’s had enough, Matt. Thanks.” The deep voice behind Melissa makes her freeze, and it’s not just the suddenness of it, but it’s the coldness in his tone that makes her wish she could wave a magic wand and disappear into thin air. She swallows hard and turns around to face Hawk. Her heart still does the erratic beat that she’s become used to around him, but it’s not just the anticipation of seeing him, of his touch that does it. It’s the fact that he doesn’t look at all happy to see her. “She’s just leaving.”
Melissa blinks, processing what he’s just said, and Matt weighs in so she doesn’t have to. “Josh’s paying for her drinks, man.” Melissa is grateful for Matt’s response on her behalf, even though she’s fairly certain it has more to do with his bottom line than with the fact that he actually wants her in the bar.
“And I’m telling you to stop serving her.” Hawk looks past Melissa, focusing on Matt, and she senses rather than sees Matt shrug before moving off to take another order.
Melissa blinks back the tears that are rapidly forming behind her eyes. The last thing she wants is to dissolve into a pathetic puddle in front of him. She’s stronger than that, and although her self-respect is hanging by a thread, she has to hang on to the last vestiges of it. She has never let a guy make her feel this small, and no matter how much she cares about Hawk, she isn’t prepared to let this be the first time.
“Hawk, can we talk about this?” Her voice is low, but she’s impressed that at least it doesn’t shake. She leans back, letting the bar support her a little, more because she doesn’t trust her legs not to shake than to appear relaxed.
“I don’t have anything to say to you—except that you need to leave.” He doesn’t step any further towards her. He doesn’t need to for Melissa to feel the anger radiating off of him. His hands are clenched into fists, and she notices the bruising on his right knuckles, remembering the way he’d punched the doorframe of her front door before he’d walked out of it. She resists the urge to reach out and stroke her finger across his hand; it doesn’t look like he would welcome any kind of contact from her.
“I didn’t come to fight with you, Hawk. I just want to talk.” She looks at him searchingly, forcing him to meet her gaze, and she feels the familiar jolt as his dark eyes seem to penetrate right through to her soul. She catches a flicker of something on his face, as if the anger that had been masking his features was, for a few brief seconds, chased away by something else, something like the way he used to look at her. But just as quickly as she has seen it, it disappears, and her heart drops, feeling like she’s just lost him again.
“What part of ‘I have nothing to say to you’ do you not understand?” He’s aggressive, looking at her like she couldn’t be any less important to him.
She fumbles for a response as the sting of his words feel worse than if he had actually hit her. Ali beats her to the punch.
“Back off, hotshot. Last time I checked, this was a free country, and I didn’t see your name over the door.” Ali levels him with her cold stare and flicks her hair dismissively. Melissa feels bolstered by her friend’s support, but this isn’t Ali’s battle to fight.
“It’s alright, Ali. This is his world, not mine. I shouldn’t have come here.” Melissa takes a deep breath, biting her lip, fighting to keep the tears that are threatening to take hold at bay.
“What the hell, Ownes?” Felicia’s voice rings out, drawing the attention of almost everyone in the room. She throws a glare out, and the men go back to their drinking and their conversations. Melissa makes a mental note to work on her glare.
Melissa looks down at the petite blonde squaring up to Hawk who stands over a foot taller than her. It would be funny if not for the anger radiating off of both of them.
“Don’t get involved, Felicia. This has nothing to do with you.” Hawk tries to shrug off the hand that his best friend has placed on his shoulder, but Felicia clearly doesn’t have any intention of letting go of him.
“Excuse me?” She gives him an ‘Oh no you didn’t’ look that should come accompanied with snapping fingers.
“She’s feisty. I wouldn’t want to be on the other team when she’s fighting.” Ali looks at Felicia admiringly, and Melissa is inclined to agree with her.
“What do you mean it has nothing to do with me?” The little blonde is now jabbing her index finger into Hawk’s chest. “I’m the one who’s had to put up with you moping around like a kicked puppy for the past week, and believe me, it’s not cute. And yeah, I figure it does have something to do with me when my best friend throws the best thing that’s ever happened to him away.” Felicia’s chest rises and falls, as she rides her anger. Melissa feels her heart warm at Felicia’s words, but Hawk clearly doesn’t want to know.
“Now isn’t the time for this, Felicia. Not here, not now. I’m not having this conversation with you!” He steps back from her and absently rubs his chest, no doubt sore from her incessant poking.
“You’re here; she’s here.” Felicia gestures behind her to where Melissa and Ali are standing stock-still, powerless to do anything but observe Felicia’s attack. “I’d say it’s the perfect time.”
“She doesn’t belong here, Felicia. She can’t be trusted. She’s proven that already.” Hawk’s words hurt more than Melissa could have prepared for. She doesn’t even realize she’s digging her fingernails into her palms until Ali slaps her hands away.
“She belongs here because I’ve invited her.” Felicia crosses her arms over her chest, projecting an image of an immovable force.
“And I want her to stay.” Josh’s voice pipes up, as he appears behind Felicia, and Melissa feels a surge of gratitude that he would stand up for her.