CHAPTER THREE
CAILYN
Cailyn woke abruptly, a cool sense of calm drifting over her. She blinked at the white ceiling, murmured voices reaching her ears as she tried to get her bearings. A harsh burn rippled around her neck and her breathing became shallow as she realized no warmth surrounded her, no scent of her Alpha, no purr. She lifted her head and everything came rushing back. The Mothers.
She sat in a tilted chair that kept her almost lying at a diagonal angle. An oval, ice-blue room surrounded her and the Mothers, in their white, hooded robes, stood at the foot of her chair talking amongst themselves. Beakers and potion bottles littered the wooden tables pressed against the walls; some filled with liquids of all colors, some glowing, others empty, but the sight of them made Cailyn’s nerves flutter. She brushed her trembling fingers over the heated skin on her neck and gasped as the raw pain increased.
"She’s awake."
The Mothers all turned to her, their voices dying out.
"Mothers," Cailyn said, her voice sounding firm regardless of her trembling stomach. "What is going on?"
"Your neck will soothe a moment, Cailyn," said Mother Naysa. "I'm sorry if you’re feeling any pain."
"I’m afraid we were unable to take it off,” Mother Orlee said, her expression somber.
“’I don’t care about the chain,” Cailyn said, forcefully. “You just used magic on me to force me in here against my will!”
“Stop being a child!” Mother Freya snapped.
Cailyn started, taken back by her tone.
“We trained you to be a spy, capable of taking on any role, capable of maneuvering any situation, skillful enough to deliver powerful feats to secure the safety of your sisters without anyone even knowing it,” Freya said hotly. “We did not train you to be this entitled.” Her eyes blazed. “We had to get you here to the sanctuary so we could try to protect your child without all your questions delaying matters. So we did it. Do we need to always give you an order before you’re capable of doing as you’re told?”
“I am no longer a fucking spy!” Cailyn’s fury spiked as she pushed herself up onto her elbows. Whether the Mothers flinched at the use of her language or her volume, she didn’t know, but she didn’t give a shit. “You told me to run back to my Alpha and forget all about you and everything I have ever known. Don’t expect me to now fall in line and be a good little girl when you demand it!”
Freya opened her mouth, her face contorted, but her twin, Mother Fern, slipped a hand onto her forearm and she stilled.
“I apologize for your distress, Cailyn,” Fern said. “It was not our intention to worry or frighten you. But you must understand that there are time constraints.”
“Why?” Cailyn asked. “What for? Why are you so concerned about this chain?”
The Mothers glanced at each other before moving to form a semicircle around her. Cailyn glanced at them all warily.
Mother Naysa spoke first. “You know that magic is everywhere—it makes up the core energy of everything in existence. Yes?”
Cailyn nodded. “Pure magic comes from the purest of natural matter, but it exists in different states depending on the form of the matter.”
“Exactly,” Mother Naysa said. “Everyone absorbs magic into their bodies, which is what gives them the ability to then affect and manipulate the magic around us. This control becomes more powerful with the right training or access steps, such as spells or charms. However, after a time, that ability begins to erode because the magic around us is more powerful and strains the magic that exists within the body. It wears on the ability and twists it into a warped state that affects the natural matter of the individual—their bodies and minds. But for us it’s different. Omegas begin absorbing magic into their bodies within the womb. It becomes embedded into us so deeply that we are able to manipulate it in a purer way than other dynamics. And it doesn’t strain because it’s threaded into our physical being, allowing us to connect to magic in a deeper way. This is why we can use the Talent so liberally without any damage, and why we are capable of more powerful feats and easier mental control. We are the only dynamic that can do this to our knowledge.”
Cailyn gaped at her, trying to absorb everything she said. “So we are born with a more powerful magic inside us?”
“Everyone is born with magic inside them,” Mother Orlee responded. “Which is why everyone can use magic if they choose to learn how. But Omegas have it nested into every fiber of our being. It’s like we are simply born to use magic more powerfully.”
“But there was nothing about this in all the Talent-lore training,” Cailyn said, bewildered. “If Malloron’s family created the use of the Talent—”
“Most of the Visant family were unaware of the strength of connection that Omegas have with magic.” Mother Azia’s gravelly voice filled the room. “They developed the use of the Talent based on their understanding of how most used it at the time. One of the queens, Kasmira Visant, began to realize her own experiences were different and documented them separately.”
Cailyn took a breath, digesting this information. “So why is no one aware of it?”
“Queen Kasmira had her own issues in her time, and she was smart,” Azia said. “She shared the information with only those she trusted. The celebrated Visant Talent-crafters of recorded history had no idea how inferior their use of the Talent really was.”
“And they still don’t know?”
“We destroyed all research and knowledge pertaining to this element of our makeup,” Mother Fern said. “If citizens across the Lands were to know, then it would be much easier for them to come to the conclusion that the Omega use of the Talent is superior. It would make it harder for us to avoid detection.”
Cailyn nodded. That made sense.
“This charm chain you wear,” Mother Naysa said after a moment, “is not only stopping you from accessing magic, it’s stopping your child from absorbing it as she grows. She will be unable to use magic without significant damage unless we remove it before you reach too far into your pregnancy.”
“You are approaching five months already,” Mother Orlee said. “It is dangerous for her that she has already gone without absorption for so long.”
Cailyn breathed deeply, her head suddenly spinning.
“You need to tell us how to remove this chain,” Mother Fern said, her voice soft. “We have tried it but it seems to been created in a very specific way.”
“Only Drocco can take it off,” Cailyn said, finally. “That is how it works.”
“But who made it?”
Cailyn lifted her shoulders. “I don’t know. He put it on me in the Western Lands during my Haze… It could have been made there.”
The Mothers glanced at each other, seeming to silently agree on some kind of conclusion. Mother Naysa turned to her. “You will have to stay here until we can remove it, Cailyn.”
Cailyn gasped. “No! I can’t. I have to go back to Drocco.”
“We have to get it off,” Mother Orlee said firmly. “This cannot be negotiated.”
“Drocco will take it off,” Cailyn insisted, panic bubbling within her. “If I explain, he will—”
“He will keep it in place,” Mother Orlee said. “Because he will be glad to have a child that cannot use the Talent to any great degree.”
Cailyn opened her mouth, but could not find an argument against that fact. But there were others. “I have to be with my Alpha. I cannot be away from him. Not even for a night.”
“We will find a way to secure the health of you and the child,” Mother Orlee said. “We have to do this, Cailyn. Your child cannot be disadvantaged in this way. It is cruel.”
“What are you talking about?” Cailyn asked, bewildered. “How will you secure my health without an Alpha? Through magic?” Her mind could barely comprehend everything they had already told her, but the idea they could somehow replace anything that Drocco provided for her was baffling.
Mother Naysa leaned forward and patted her hand. “We won’t keep you from him longer than necessary, Cailyn.”
The feel of her warm hand calmed Cailyn’s thoughts somewhat. She looked at each of them, taking in their faces as though she was seeing them for the first time. Although they were all mature, they clearly came from different countries across the known Lands. Also they were different ages; Mother Orlee had the least lines of age on her deep brown skin and could be the youngest, while Mother Azia’s gray hair indicated she was the oldest. This had once been a comfort to her—knowing that all of their decisions would be fair and well-thought-out, but now she was fearful of who they actually were.
“But why not just tell us all of this?” Cailyn asked, her voice quiet and trembly as she looked them all in the eyes. “Why not tell Omegas all this information? Why hide it?”
Mother Fern worried her brows. “There is no need for everyone to know everything, Cailyn,” she said. “You seem to be under the assumption that we purposely keep things from you and your sisters, but you must understand that running a community is not easy. What good would it do to fill your heads with useless knowledge?”
“Our first priority is to make sure you are aware of who you are and why you are here in this compound.” Mother Freya had calmed, but a hard edge remained in her voice. “That is what we focus on teaching all Omegas primarily.”
“And you have to also know,” Mother Naysa said hesitantly, “that such important knowledge has to be protected too.” She squeezed Cailyn’s hands. “Look at what your Alpha was able to force you to tell him when he kept you prisoner. I’m sure you have told him more since.”
Cailyn’s eyes lowered, a niggling shame suddenly worming in the pit of her stomach.
“So you see,” Naysa said when she didn’t respond, “we have to be careful about protecting ourselves and all Omegas regarding important knowledge.”
Their argument on this matter seemed to make sense and yet so many questions remained unanswered. Cailyn bit her lip as she thought, unsure how to respond.
“Have you made peace with your Alpha now?” Mother Azia asked.
Cailyn lifted her head, tears stinging at the thought of Drocco. It had certainly been more than an hour she had been gone. He would know by now and she dreaded to think what he thought. “I want to go back to him.”
“You will,” Mother Azia said, although Cailyn wasn’t reassured. “As soon as we can let you. But we have to help your little one first.”
Cailyn shook her head, blinking away her tears. “She doesn’t have to use the Talent.”
Mother Naysa moved closer to her, inching around to her left side, her voice calm and soft. “Let’s say she doesn’t. Let’s say we allow you to leave and carry her until full term. Then what happens? How will she protect herself? If somehow you were to keep her, she would be completely vulnerable to every single Alpha warrior in your palace or she would eventually go mad from overuse of the Talent. And even if we take her to live here, she will never be able to leave the compound, Cailyn.” Naysa’s brown eyes bore into her own. “Never.”
Cailyn took a breath and tried to take in the implications of her words. Her child would be stuck in the compound, dependent on others to protect her all the time. Although most Omegas weren’t spies, they at least were able to use the Talent if they needed to. This decision wasn’t about her, it was about her daughter and enabling her to have a full life as an Omega, whatever that may mean. She lifted her eyes to Mother Azia and inched her head down in a tiny nod.
Mother Azia’s gray eyes softened. “Since you are willing to do the mind wipe, we will answer any questions you have until that time.” The other Mothers shot a look of surprise at Mother Azia at that statement, but she continued on. “We will all be honest with you as long as you agree not to be difficult while you are here.” She paused, a rare, soft smile bracing her lips. “Many of the Omegas look up to you, Cailyn. You do not know it, but they respect your strength and the conviction you have to the Omega cause; that you have been so dedicated and focused on your missions and committed to honing your skills without seeking distraction. Their admiration for you is a testament to your courage and kindness that they have all witnessed. They will become distraught if you begin telling them information that will cause them to distrust us. All I ask is that you let us explain things to you properly first.”
Cailyn bit her lip while she thought over the request. It seemed reasonable enough—at least she would get the answers she wanted. She met Azia’s eyes again and nodded.
***
They kept her in the chair for at least another hour examining her neck, trying different charms, spells, and even tiny bursts of pure magic to try and get the charm chain off, but nothing worked. Mothers Orlee and Fern went to examine some of the older spellbooks and Mothers Azia and Freya left to attend to existing appointments within the compound.
As Mother Naysa leaned over her, applying gentle healing magic to soothe her neck, she murmured, “We are not as terrible as your Alpha would have you believe, Cailyn.”
Cailyn swallowed. “I understand you are trying to protect us, but you don’t have to lie to us.”
“Sometimes lies are necessary to protect the ones we love,” Naysa said.
Cailyn remained silent as she stared up at the ceiling, Drocco’s words resounding in her mind. Lies bring nothing but pain. “Telling us we have family wouldn’t harm us, Mother. We are smart enough to know we have to stay away.”
Mother Naysa straightened, looking down at Cailyn. “Do you think that’s something we haven’t tried before? Eventually, all Omegas are tempted, especially if they are on a mission that takes them into direct contact with family members. Curiosity can overcome even the strongest willed Omega, Cailyn. And one slip could hurt all of us.”
“So you take us at a young age and wipe our memories so we have no knowledge of who we really are?”
“What good is it to know who you really are, when that life could kill you, or cause you permanent suffering? What good is it to always be tempted to reconnect to a life that is cruel?” Mother Naysa shook her head. “You must be able to understand that making this decision was difficult for us. Taking these steps to protect Omegas came with certain downfalls, Cailyn. Surely you understand that it was never simple; not with the number of Omegas we are protecting. We had to do what was necessary for the safety of all Omegas. One mistake costs us all.”
Cailyn huffed out a breath. “I cannot believe that there was truly no other way.”
Mother Naysa held her eye for a long moment and then sat on the stool by her chair. “I assure you, at the time there wasn’t. I haven’t been out of this compound for decades, but I’m sure the Lands are very different now than they were back when we created this place.”
Cailyn’s eyes widened. “You were all around when the compound started? I suspected it was just Mother Azia.”
“It was the two of us,” Mother Naysa confirmed. “Azia and I.” She entwined her fingers and rested them on her lap. “It was a more brutal time, Cailyn. Many of the richer Alphas kept multiple Omegas, and some of them were housed in conditions worse than horse stables. They were beaten, whipped, starved, made to do terrible things…” Her eyes glazed over as she spoke. “At that time, the law stipulated that Omegas be chained. We were never to go outside unless chained to an Alpha. Some Omegas were never properly dressed, and others were taken out while their Haze was upon them. The control of land and territory was an important concern for all of the ruling powers at the time, and those in power, both Betas and Alphas, found that they could sway another by the scent of an Omega in her Haze. Some even used Omegas to cause Alphas to kill each other while in their rut in order to dispose of a difficult ruler or potential political threat. Omegas became highly desired property; bought and sold based on age, the frequency of their Haze, and potential to breed children. We were treated like livestock.”
Mother Naysa’s voice became hoarse and she squeezed her eyes shut and swallowed, unable to continue for a moment.
Cailyn watched her, dread and horror causing tears to well in her own eyes. How could things have gotten so bad? Where were the Alphas who should have been protecting Omegas during this time?
Mother Naysa took a breath and opened her eyes. “The prostitution of Omegas reached new heights when an Alpha could take a walk with his Omega on a leash and earn a small fortune before he reached his destination,” Naysa said, her voice wavering. “This was happening in the streets, Cailyn. In front of people, in front of children. Omegas would be mounted by strangers and then whipped until bloody if the stranger had found any reason to be unsatisfied. Azia lost six of her blood relative sisters to this kind of lifestyle—six, Cailyn. Children under twelve feared what dynamic they would be, because being an Omega was the worst existence possible. Some young girls killed themselves when they discovered their dynamic. The culture viewed Omegas as the lowest, most worthless dynamic. Lower than the mangy dogs that roamed the streets for food. Something drastic had to be done.”
Cailyn blinked, her tears tracking down her face. “Why didn’t anyone help?” she whispered.
“The Alphas that instigated and encouraged this behavior were the richest and most powerful of men with depraved minds and the strongest of egos. They collected Omegas, and no one could challenge what they did with their own property. Plus, nearly all of them were either Talent-crafters or protected by Talent-crafters.”
Cailyn breathed shallowly. “But if Omegas could use the Talent so well, why didn’t they protect themselves?”
“Only a very select few were aware of that,” Naysa said. “And no Alpha or Beta allowed Omegas to learn the Talent. I don’t know why Queen Kasmira didn’t share the true knowledge about the Talent, even if just to Omegas—it was way before mine and Azia’s time. I can only assume there was concern about how others would react. I’m sure if she had known what was to come she may have chosen differently.” She thought for a moment. “Also it’s generally not in our nature to be aggressive and combative. I’m not sure Omegas of that time would have fought against fierce, Talent-crafter Alphas, even if they were trained.”
Cailyn nodded. The training that spies received at the compound was intended for furtive, investigative, and surveillance activities—never to outright attack unless it was unavoidable. “How did you and Azia find out?”
“A descendant of the family selected Azia for training after all her sisters died. She was suicidal but had no way of escaping her life. They trained her in secret and encouraged her to be strong and brave enough to take on the task of preserving Omega life. If they hadn’t, I don’t know where it would have ended.”
Cailyn exhaled a slow breath. “I understand it was a difficult time, but surely someone could have talked to the Alphas or somehow—”
“There was no negotiation to be had, no one we could rely on, Cailyn,” Naysa interrupted. “We did what was necessary and we had to get it right. We could not take any risks, we could not make any mistakes. And that has been at the core of every decision we have made. No risks, no mistakes. The Omega population’s well-being has always been top priority. Do you understand?”
Cailyn stared back at Naysa’s bright eyes and nodded. Everything Naysa said stirred a despair inside her. It was true that she did not and could not truly understand the horrors of what Omegas of the past lived through, and maybe the sacrifice of her family—of all Omegas’ families had been a necessary one. At that time. But now things were different.
“I can’t imagine that happening in the Eastern Lands,” she murmured.
Naysa shook her head. “This was in the Western Lands.”
Cailyn peered at her. Naysa had raven black hair that contrasted the dark sand coloring of her complexion. Cailyn had assumed she was born in Saderthorn or Jynora, but she could indeed be from across the White Ocean. “You’re from the Western Lands?”
“Azia and I, yes.”
Cailyn frowned. “I thought Omegas were taken from the Eastern Lands first.”
“We escaped to the Eastern Lands to formulate a plan and gather support,” Naysa explained. “The Eastern Lands were treating Omegas badly, but not as badly as the Western Lands—not yet. We gathered a group to set up the compound and then began rescuing Omegas.”
Cailyn stared at her. “How old are you and Mother Azia?”
Naysa smiled. “I’m one hundred and fifty-three. Mother Azia is nearly two hundred.”
Cailyn’s brows rose. “How have you lived so long?”
Naysa tilted her head, her eyes on Cailyn. “How do you think the compound is maintained, Cailyn? Why do you think we chose the Wastelands?”
Cailyn tapped her fingers on her thighs as she thought. The Wastelands were known to be inhabitable because of the volatile environment, but the compound must also need an incredible amount of magic to maintain it. Somehow that connected to the extended lives of the Mothers. “The Wastelands has a raw, powerful, natural energy,” she began. “And its pure magic sustains the compound.”
Mother Naysa smiled and nodded.
“But it would still need to be filtered and manipulated into a usable form,” Cailyn said thoughtfully. Raw magic had to be diluted or filtered through spells, charms, or mental cleansing in order to be used effectively, otherwise it was too unwieldy.
“Exactly,” Naysa said. “At first, one of us would spend days manipulating the magic from the environment in order to preserve the compound, but we realized, due to the way magic works within our bodies, we could filter it through ourselves.”
Cailyn’s brows lifted. “Through yourself? You absorb magic from the Wastelands into your body?”
“Yes,” Naysa said. “And it gets filtered back out to create our environment, through the added use of charms and spells.”
Cailyn thought for a moment, squinting her eyes. “So you can never leave here?”
“No. The compound would weaken.”
“What about the other Mothers? Is it the same for them?”
“Yes. But we would never want to leave here anyway, Cailyn. We are intrinsically linked to this compound; we can build and create as we need, we can travel across it in the blink of an eye, we can sense the mood of the Omegas and amend their surroundings to their needs. And there is no reason for us to leave if we have great spies out there in the Lands bringing us Omegas to protect.”
“But then how do you know whether things have changed enough to venture back into the Lands?” Cailyn asked. “Surely you must realize that the Lands are not like they were. The absence of Omegas has changed it dramatically from how you experienced it. It could be possible to have a better life.”
“The Western Lands no longer deal in depravities?” Naysa asked evenly.
Cailyn thought back to Malloron and hesitated.
“As long as there are Alphas or Betas who would seek to take advantage of Omegas, we will never truly be safe, Cailyn.”
“But what about the Alphas who need us and will protect us? What if they can find a way for everyone to be protected now that things have changed?” Cailyn argued. “What you have done is made us believe that all Alphas are the same, Mother. Can you not see how that is wrong? They’re not all like that.”
“At the time our decisions were based on what we knew about Alphas, and they were indeed all like that.” Mother Naysa sighed. “But I know they may not be now. I’m not disagreeing with you. Eventually there would be—”
“Are you referring to your Alpha?” said a low voice from the other side of the room.
Cailyn tensed, startled. Mother Azia had somehow reentered the room without her realizing it, and stood against the wall by the door.
“Because I distinctly remember you begging and pleading to not go back to him,” Azia said, her eyes glittering. “I remember the horror on your face at the suggestion that you should even consider spending more time with him.”
“That was before,” Cailyn shot at her. “Before I got to know him.”
“Which you did only at our insistence,” Mother Azia shot back. “It doesn’t change the fact that he treated you badly. Even without the influence of Alphas from times past, your Alpha treated you badly simply because he could.”
“No.” Cailyn shook her head. “He had reasons.”
“They always do,” Azia murmured.
Cailyn turned to Naysa. “He did,” she said, her voice soft, knowing that her argument sounded weak against everything Naysa had described. “He didn’t want to. He didn’t enjoy it, Naysa.”
Mother Naysa’s smile was downcast. “Maybe so, Cailyn. I see you have truly recognized the joy that comes from being with one’s Alpha,” she said. “But you cannot vouch for them all.”
“Neither can you,” Cailyn responded, looking between both of the Mothers. “You cannot assume they are all the same.”
Mother Azia walked slowly toward her, her eyes trained on Cailyn’s face. “They don’t all need to be as drastically depraved for Omegas to suffer. Even if some are kind, there will still be cruelty at the hands of others behind closed doors. And it only takes one king, one leader, one emperor to be publicly cruel, and the rest will indulge.” She stood for a long moment, staring at Cailyn. “We will never go back to that time, Cailyn. Never. Whatever sacrifices have to be made, we will make them.”
***
Mother Naysa escorted Cailyn back to her quarters in the training region to collect some of her belongings. She’d been housed in a multi-level building specifically for trained spies. Each floor provided three spacious quarters, and spies on the same floor tended to be trained to the same level. Cailyn, Amara, and Victoya had all ensured that their training remained equal to each other so that they could live on the same floor and support each other as much as possible. Their skills had developed differently, but their competence was of equal measure. However, Amara was still in the Western Lands and Victoya was most likely still debriefing, so neither of them were around.
After she collected her clothes and possessions, Mother Naysa led Cailyn back to the sanctuary and showed her to quarters on one of the upper floors, which would be her temporary home until they managed to take the charm chain off.
“I advise that you rest and take time to read,” Mother Naysa said, gesturing to the extensive bookshelf in the main living room. “I wouldn’t recommend wandering around the sanctuary without an escort. Please ask a Mother if you wish to go for a walk.”
Cailyn frowned. “I can’t leave this room?”
“We would prefer if you stayed in here as much as possible, Cailyn.”
Cailyn eyed her for a long moment. “You don’t want me talking to the Omegas.”
Naysa smiled, almost apologetically. “We would prefer it if you didn’t. Your pregnancy is showing, Cailyn. It would be better for everyone, including you, if you didn’t have to answer numerous questions by curious and eager young Omegas, right now. You know how inquisitive the ones who haven’t been out into the Lands can be.”
The thought of being questioned by the younger Omegas did indeed sound horrendous. Cailyn remembered once being surrounded and bombarded with questions after returning from an information-collection assignment near the notoriously colorful phenomenon of the Ariyon mountains.
“And it’s not just that,” Naysa continued. “This sanctuary is the heart of the compound, where many important matters, specialist training, and business is tended to. It is in the best interest of you and your child, that you stay secluded from that.”
Cailyn sighed and nodded. That was Naysa’s way of saying the memory wipe would be harder if she continued to learn new and distressing information.
"So I just stay here?" Cailyn asked as Mother Naysa made to leave. “On my own?”
Mother Naysa paused, looking around the quarters. "This is more elaborate and comfortable that your usual quarters, isn't it?"
"Yes, it's just…" Cailyn shrugged. She hadn't slept alone in nearly five months. Drocco had been with her every night.
Mother Naysa smiled. "You will get used to being alone again, and this isn't forever."
"You said you'd find a way to satisfy my need for his purr," Cailyn said. "I’ll need it tonight."
Mother Naysa nodded. "We are still trying to figure out what the best option would be, but you will have something."
Cailyn frowned, but didn't say any more. How could anything compare to Drocco's purr? The idea baffled her, but maybe they had a solution. She inclined her head in agreement.
After Naysa left, Cailyn found herself pacing the rooms, restless and anxious. Thoughts rolled in her mind about everything the Mothers had said while all the while a dread grew in her chest about the fact she’d left Drocco. She deeply regretted it. Even if she lost her memory of everything that happened back at the cabin, Drocco would realize and he would try again to win her around. She believed he would, even if he struggled with confusion and anger about it. On the other hand, if she hadn't left, her child risked being born without the Omega version of the Talent and that may have sentenced her to a life of misery. Her regret couldn’t quite be complete with that knowledge in mind.
Cailyn's new quarters felt markedly more lavish than her previous one but she wasn’t particularly comfortable. She preferred her run-down lodge to pretty surroundings. She flicked through the books on the bookshelf, but couldn’t focus on anything. The more she thought, the more questions arose and then she realized she hadn't asked the Mothers the right questions.
By the time the skies turned dark, Cailyn had specific questions in mind to ask Mother Naysa upon her return, but unfortunately it was Mother Freya who knocked on her door.
"You don’t need to look at me like that, Cailyn," Mother Freya said dryly as Cailyn narrowed her eyes. "I simply get impatient with the pandering sometimes. It doesn't mean I wish you any ill will."
"I would be interested to see what you are like when you do intend ill will," Cailyn said, sharply.
The corner of Mother Freya’s mouth quirked up. “Not all of us can be as mild-mannered or calm as your favorite Mothers, Cailyn.”
“And what do you mean by pandering?” Cailyn asked, ignoring her response.
"Do you think the other Mothers would put up with outbursts from most others?" Freya asked, raising an eyebrow. "Believe me, you would have been shut up, knocked out, and dealt with as necessary if they didn't have a soft spot for you."
Cailyn glared at her. “I was.”
“Not without all the unnecessary talk beforehand,” Freya said, a hint of annoyance in her tone.
"It was still wrong regardless. That approach doesn't soften my opinion about what goes on here."
Mother Freya crossed her arms. "What makes you think your opinion is so important? Do you have any experience or credentials that give you the right to judge how we run an entire community of women? Just because we give you license to make judgments on your missions doesn’t mean you know anything about the actual reality of what is happening here."
"And what is happening here?" Cailyn asked tersely.
Freya leaned forward. "We keep Omegas alive and safe. That is the bottom line." She straightened, dropping her arms. "Now, I'm here to see if we can do something about this purr you so desperately need." She strode past Cailyn and into the room. "Come and sit here." She knelt down in front of the couch and patted the seat in front of her.
Cailyn edged toward her and sat down. "What do you intend to do?"
Freya placed both of her hands Cailyn stomach. "Just relax and let me know if any of this has an impact." She closed her eyes, pressing her hands firmly into Cailyn stomach. They remained in this position for a long moment before she opened her eyes again and peered up at Cailyn. "Can you feel that?"
"Feel what?"
Freya frowned. She closed her eyes again, seeming to concentrate harder. "Do you feel anything now?"
"No," Cailyn said hesitantly. "What am I supposed to be feeling?"
Freya cursed under her breath and huffed out a harsh sigh. "Never mind," she said irritably, removing her hands and getting to her feet. "It doesn't seem that I'm capable of providing you with what you need."
A flash of panic leapt through Cailyn. "What do you mean? You said you would provide an alternative to me," she said, aware that her voice had risen. "I need my Alpha."
"Don't panic, Cailyn," Freya said firmly. "It’s not the end of the world if you don't have it tonight. Tomorrow we will have to find a solution that will replicate the feeling of his purr."
"The feeling of his purr?" Cailyn said, disbelief and anger stirring in her. "Is that all you think it is? Just a vibration and nothing else? What about his scent, and his embrace, and his—" She stopped abruptly realizing she was on the verge of tears.
Freya's face softened. "Nothing can replace your true mate, Cailyn. Nothing. The best we can hope for is that we are able to remove that chain from your neck tomorrow and you can go back to him."
"Go back to him with half my memories of him," Cailyn pointed out. "And unaware that I will carry this child to full-term only so she can be taken from me."
"But you will at least be with him," Freya said. "Without any knowledge of us, you will accept what your body tells you about him, you will know innately that you belong together and you won't question it. He will be happy, and you will be happy. And you can have more children." She turned toward the door. "It is not as bad as you think it will be."
After she left, Cailyn thought back to the moment in her cabin when he laid himself bare, opening up his history to her and sharing his painful past. She thought back to how he comforted her after telling her about her mother, how he held her and supported her yet never made her feel like she was weak. She thought back to the contentment she felt when the vibration in her stomach matched his purr and how complete and safe he had made her feel. She could lose all memory of that.
She placed a hand on her stomach. "It is exactly as bad as I think," she whispered.
***
The next day, Mother Naysa knocked on her door in the early afternoon. "I need to take you to a different region so you might want to grab a cloak." She turned on her heel and marched away before Cailyn even had time to respond.
Cailyn grabbed a cloak and hurried after her, trying to struggle through her miserable mood. It had been a difficult night without Drocco—she had barely slept.
Mother Naysa led her out of the building and across the training grounds to the very edge of the region. A sheened wall surrounded the entire Omega Compound, but it was difficult to detect. From a distance, it reflected the compound, making it feel even larger, and was far enough away from any buildings that Omegas paid no attention to it on a daily basis. However, when close to it, a blurred and twisted view of the Wastelands could be seen beyond.
When Mother Naysa arrived at the wall, she simply carried on walking straight through the magical edge. Cailyn blinked in surprise, then followed her. The warm rush of magic on her skin suggested that the edge was simply a barrier of sorts rather than a portal, which would have felt cooler.
On the other side, she walked into an area she had never seen before. It looked like a part of the compound, the same kind of buildings, the same kind of layout, but it was deserted.
Cailyn slowed, confused. "Where are we?"
Mother Naysa turned to her. "We are still in the compound, this is just a different region that has been hidden from the main compound."
Cailyn stopped. "Why is there a hidden region?"
Naysa threw her a look and continued walking. Cailyn strode to keep up. Bearing over to the right, they headed to what looked like a cottage and entered.
Inside was quite homely. Rich furnishings dominated the space, thick rugs, well-made, solid wooden furniture, sophisticated candle lamps, and colorful paintings on the walls. In the middle of the room, facing the left wall, stood a man. Thick, wide, and tall, he was clearly an Alpha.
Cailyn’s mouth dropped open at the shock of the sight of a man inside the compound. And not just any man but an Alpha.
“Why is there an Alpha in here?” she said in hushed tones. “Do the other Mothers know?”
Mother Naysa walked into the room and tilted her head, gesturing for Cailyn to follow.
Cailyn stepped in, slightly on edge about what the Alpha would do once he saw them both. But he simply stood in the center of the room staring straight ahead. He didn’t even seem to notice that they had entered. As she approached him, Mother Naysa moved to stand directly in front of him, but he didn’t even lower his gaze to look at her.
“This Alpha lives here,” Mother Naysa said staring at him. “This is his home.”
Cailyn moved to stand next to her and looked up at the Alpha. He was older but she couldn’t quite tell his age. “Can he see us?” Cailyn said, almost whispering.
“He can sense that we are here,” Mother Naysa said. “But he doesn’t have much cognitive ability.”
Cailyn lifted her hand and waved in front of his face. He blinked slowly once, but otherwise did not react. “What’s wrong with him?”
“He is mostly brain dead.”
Cailyn glanced at her. “Are you healing him?”
Mother Naysa shook her head, her eyes still on the Alpha.
“Then why is he here? Why does he live here?”
Mother Naysa turned to her. “He was one of the cruelest Alphas back when I was living in the Western Lands. Possibly the cruelest.”
Cailyn turned to her, frowning. “And so this is his punishment? Did you cause his brain damage?”
Mother Naysa glanced at her. “He was also Mother Azia’s true mate.”
Cailyn’s eyes widened and she turned back to the man. He was older than she first assumed but did not look as old as any of the Mothers. His brown, dull eyes had no expression in them, and drool trickled from the corner of his mouth.
“You cannot think this is right, Mother,” Cailyn said, her voice almost a whisper. “No matter the atrocities he committed, you cannot think keeping him here like this is right.”
Mother Naysa sighed. “I don’t, Cailyn.”
Cailyn looked at her in surprise.
“I don’t believe this is right,” Mother Naysa said, her eyes soft on the Alpha. “I think he should die and only live on in memories.” She turned to Cailyn. “There are reasons why he can’t, but I think Mother Azia has been able to hold onto her bitterness and anger about the past because he still lives. She is not healing as she should, time should have healed some of her suffering by now.”
Cailyn spoke hesitantly. “So you agree with me that it is unreasonable for us to remain hidden here?”
She looked back at Cailyn. “No. I do believe Azia has every right to be cautious about Omegas returning to the Lands. But I don’t think it is unreasonable to consider that times have changed since we created this place. What we did back then was to protect ourselves so that we could thrive as a dynamic. I never believed Omegas would live this way forever, not when we are now able to use the Talent so extensively.”
Cailyn nodded. “That is what some of the younger Omegas think.”
“I have heard the murmurings,” Mother Naysa agreed. “They are not wrong. We should be considering leading our own reintegration into the Lands rather than continuing to hide. I don’t want the choice taken from us by force.”
Cailyn turned to look back at the Alpha. “Have you spoken about this to any of the other Mothers?”
Mother Naysa hummed and moved to sit at the table behind her. “The general feeling is that we have no idea what will happen if we reintroduce ourselves to the Lands. The risk is too great.”
Cailyn joined her at the table, sitting opposite her. “That is a valid concern.”
“It is. But not enough of a reason to not find a solution.”
Cailyn exhaled a breath. If the Mothers were divided, she wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. “Do the other Mothers know I am here?”
Naysa nodded. “They think he is a potential replacement for your Alpha’s purr.”
“What?” Cailyn exclaimed, horrified.
Naysa held up a hand. “Don’t worry, he cannot purr much anymore. It is a random thing he does—he cannot control it in order to give you want you need.”
Cailyn’s hands fidgeted. “So how do you intend to give me what I need?”
“Honestly, I’m not sure,” Mother Naysa admitted, her brows crumpled. “Mother Freya is one of the more powerful Mothers. If she wasn’t able to create the vibration, then I’m not sure how it can be done.”
“So I am destined to suffer if you cannot get this chain off?”
Mother Naysa didn’t answer, but she didn’t have to. The worry in her eyes was enough to spark fear in Cailyn.