Zander had been silent on the drive back to the Grant family home, which was just as well, because Darren didn’t know what to say. There were no words that could thank him enough, or express his remorse in a way that didn’t sound either disingenuous or woefully inadequate.

He hated himself now more than ever, but for once, Bobby had a shot at the life he deserved, and if all it required of Darren was to swallow his pride in order to give that to him, he was going to. He’d put himself first his whole life, and for once, he was forced to accept that he didn’t have what it took to fix things on his own.

Samantha had wanted to talk when he’d returned home, since Bobby was already asleep, but Darren had told her he had a headache and really just wanted to go to bed. She’d been worried, but she didn’t push him. He knew if he talked, he’d break down again the way he had in front of Zander, and he couldn’t bear any more humiliation that night.

Somehow, he slept better that night than he had all week, even if his dreams were full of regrets and all the mistakes he’d made. He wanted so badly to do them over again, but even in his dreams, he could only relive them.

Despite his exhaustion, Darren dragged himself out of bed and went downstairs in his bathrobe, intent on at least doing the dishes and making breakfast before his parents went to church. His mother hadn’t even bothered to ask him if he wanted to go with her that morning like she had every Sunday while he’d lived at home. She probably assumed he’d turn her down like he always had, even though he could tell from the look in her eyes how important it was to her. In the very worst times after his father’s abandonment, her faith was what had gotten her through and the friends she’d made through it had been there for her in ways he’d been too young, inexperienced and lost to be himself. He knew for a fact that Christopher didn’t believe in God or the Spirits anymore than he did, but he’d always gone because it was important to Samantha.

Darren hesitated at the top of the stairs. He couldn’t hear anyone else awake, so he ran back to his room and changed into something he hoped was presentable enough for the quaint little Sunday service. He paused in the mirror. He had been so vain in his early twenties, but he couldn’t remember the last time he’d put more than a few minutes of effort into his appearance, other than his recent date with Zander. He always felt guilty about spending time or any of their limited resources on himself when he could be spending it on Bobby, but that morning, he took a bit of extra care with making sure his hair looked nice and his shirt was pressed before heading back downstairs.

The house was still quiet when he made it to the kitchen, so he got out the eggs and bread and started cooking. He was still no gourmet chef, but at least now he could make toast without starting a fire.

“I like the sound of bacon in the morning,” Christopher said, already dressed in his best suit when he came into the room.

Darren laughed. “It’ll be ready in a few minutes. There’s fresh coffee.”

“What a nice surprise,” the Alpha said pleasantly, pouring a cup. He stopped and looked surprised at the fact that Darren was dressed before noon. To be fair, he’d resembled a vampire more than a shifter the last time he’d lived under the man’s roof. “Going somewhere this morning?”

“I thought I might go with you guys to church, actually.”

Christopher’s eyes widened a bit, but he quickly hid his shock. “I’m sure your mother would love that. But uh, you do know the Reverend Judd is still there, right?”

Darren groaned. The woman was known for going off on so many tangents that by the time she got back to the original topic of the sermon, even she’d forgotten it half the time. “I’ll live.”

Christopher chuckled, sitting down at the table as Bobby came wandering into the room, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. “Something smells good.”

“Eat up,” Darren said, setting their plates on the table before helping Bobby into his chair. “You’ve still got to get dressed for church.”

“Church?” Samantha yawned as she came into the room, shuffling over to her mate. She was still in her pajamas and her hair was half-out of the messy braid she wore at night. “I was thinking of skipping today.”

“Darren was going to come with us,” Christopher said pointedly.

Samantha’s eyes widened in surprise. She looked at her son as if she thought her mate was joking. “You were?”

“Yeah, but if you’re not feeling up to it, I can go with you next week.”

“No, no!” she cried, running back toward their room. “Give me ten minutes!”

Darren couldn’t help but laugh. No matter what Reverend Judd had in store for him, he decided it was worth it if it made her that happy. Half an hour later, they were all on their way into town. The small white building was already teeming with people gathered around on the steps and lawn, catching up on smalltalk.

The moment the nearby chatter ceased and Darren found himself the center of attention, he started second guessing his decision. Bobby squeezed his hand and he looked down to find his son looking up at him with a reassuring smile. “It’s a new adventure!”

Darren smiled, squeezing his hand back. “Yeah, it is.”

“I’ll take him to the children’s class while you two go get a seat,” Samantha offered, taking Bobby’s hand to lead him inside.

“Ready?” Christopher asked, offering his arm.

Darren took it, nodding gratefully. “Here’s hoping I don’t burst into flames.”

The older Alpha chuckled. “Trust me, if I didn’t, you’ll be fine.”

Darren looked around once they were inside and found the place every bit as intimidating as he had as a rebellious teenager. He’d traded in his edgy look for more conservative fare, but he still felt just as out of place. Everyone who’d been there long enough to remember him--which was most of the town in a place as quaint and small as Sawyers--knew what he’d done. They knew he wasn’t one of them, and they were probably all just waiting for him to leave again. Half of them probably only thought he was there to pawn his son off on his parents.

As Darren walked with Christopher down the aisle, he locked eyes with Dustin, who was sitting with his mate near the front. The Alpha stood and waved them over.

Shit...

Christopher led the way to join them and Caleb stood to greet them alongside his mate. To Darren’s surprise, the omega gave him a smile that seemed almost warm.

“Morning,” Dustin said, shaking Christopher’s hand. “Good to see you guys here. Where’s Samantha?”

“She’s dropping Bobby off at Sunday school,” Christopher said pleasantly, turning to Caleb. “How’s that baby coming along?”

Caleb laughed, patting his rounded belly. “Still loading, but the doctor says we’re about sixty-percent there.”

The music started and people started filing in from the front of the church. Darren felt his throat tighten up like he was a teenager again, sitting in the back pew pretending like he was bored out of his mind when really, he was just counting the moments until he could flee the judgmental stares and whispers surrounding him.

“You should sit with us,” Caleb said, meeting Darren’s worried gaze.

“That would be lovely,” said Christopher, stepping back to let the others into the pew first. Samantha came to join them and Darren wound up sandwiched between her and the end of the aisle. He tried not to pay too much attention to the looks he was getting, but when he finally dared a glance as the homily began, he realized most of the people who were looking seemed more curious than judgmental.

Maybe he could do this. Reverend Judd had evidently taken a few speaking classes in his absence, because the sermon itself didn’t last long and Darren found himself drawn in. At least until she started talking about the importance of forgiveness. Darren squirmed in his seat. Why couldn’t it have been a sermon on the evils of adultery? That he could handle. He knew he was a terrible person, so having someone echo his own thoughts from the pulpit was just par for the course.

He could imagine what Caleb and Dustin were thinking. Of all the days she had to go into this crap. If she knew he was here, it’d be a different sermon.

Somehow, Darren made it through to the end of the service without crawling under the pew. Samantha and Christopher were evidently the most popular members of the church, because the line to greet them after the service and welcome Darren back into the fold seemed to wrap halfway around the sanctuary. He smiled and nodded his way through reintroductions to the people he’d hoped he would never have to face again.

They were all so put together and wholesome, the picture of everything nice young people from Sawyers were supposed to be. They were all mated with prestigious jobs in town and most of them had growing families on top of it all. It would have been easier if they’d greeted him with cold shoulders and catty remarks, but Darren had never been hugged or fussed over so much in his life.

No one asked about Zander, at least. He wasn’t sure if that made it easier. He found himself wanting to scream, Stop! You know who I am and what I’ve done. You should be treating me the way I deserve, not like this.

When Darren had accepted the last welcome he felt like he could stomach without reminding these people that they should be shunning him, not inviting him to their potlucks, he tapped his mother on the arm. “I should go pick up Bobby while you guys finish up.”

“Oh, I’ll show you where it is.”

“I can take him,” Caleb offered, walking over to them. “I have to pick Stephanie up anyway.”

“Thank you, sweetheart,” Samantha said with a warm smile before turning back to the other omega she’d been speaking with about some party the following week.

Darren swallowed hard, but he followed Caleb out of the sanctuary and down the hall. Here it was. Part of him dreaded the tongue lashing he was sure he had coming, but another part of him welcomed it. At least it wouldn’t fill him with even more feelings of guilt and inadequacy.

“So, how are you guys settling in?” Caleb asked awkwardly.

“Everyone’s been very kind,” Darren said with a stiff smile.

Caleb stopped walking and Darren braced himself. The omega searched his face for a moment, his eyes full of worry. “There’s something I wanted to say to you, now that we’ve got a minute.”

Here it is… “Go ahead,” said Darren. “I’m listening.”

“I’m sorry,” Caleb said in a somber, strangely guilty tone. He looked away, as if he was the one who had anything to be ashamed about. “The way I treated you when you came over the other day, it wasn’t right. I’m sorry we got off on the wrong foot.”

Darren stared at him in disbelief. Was this a joke? And here he’d thought he was the master of sarcasm. “I don’t understand. You don’t have anything to apologize for.”

“I do. What happened between you and Zander is between you two,” he said, biting his lip. “If he’s chosen to leave it in the past, I have no right to hold it against you. Especially when we’ve never even met before now. It’s just that Zander is like a brother to me. He’s family, and I’m admittedly a bit protective.”

“You’re right to be where I’m concerned,” Darren said softly. “I’m glad he had people like you and Dustin looking out for him when I wasn’t there at all.”

Caleb looked away and seemed unsure of what to say for a moment. “Do you think we could start over?”

“I’d like that,” Darren said softly. “I don’t know why you or anyone else is willing to give me a second chance at all, but I’ll take it.”

Caleb smiled softly. “We all need a second chance at some point, Darren. It’s what you do with yours that matters.”

“My mom told me about Alec,” he said quietly. “I know he was your mate first, and I’m so sorry. I wanted to be there for the funeral, I just…” he trailed off, knowing that if he told Caleb Greg hadn’t let him come, it would just sound like an excuse.

Caleb reached out to squeeze his arm. “You meant a lot to Alec. He considered you a good friend. So does Dustin.”

“Maybe they did,” he murmured. “I’m not that person anymore.”

“I don’t know,” Caleb said, watching him. “The way Dustin tells it, you’re closer to the friend he used to love than you have been in a long time.”

Darren wasn’t sure how to respond to that, but Caleb led him down the hall. The sound of children’s laughter filled the hallway. “Maybe you and Bobby could come over for a playdate with Stephanie sometime.”

Darren looked over at the other omega in surprise. “I’m sure he’d like that.”

“Daddy!” Bobby called, running over to Darren. Darren reached down and scooped his son up as a little girl toddled over to Caleb, holding a painting in her hands.

“Hey, kiddo,” Darren said, grinning. “Did you have fun?”

“It was the best!” he cried, his eyes still wide with excitement. “Can I come every day?”

Darren laughed, barely able to keep up. “I think this is really more of a Sunday thing, but Grandpa Christopher says you can start school on Monday, if you’re ready.”

“Okay!”

As Darren walked back into the sanctuary to join his parents, he found himself relaxing. For the first time in his life, he wasn’t eager to get home as soon as possible. They had moved out to the lawn, but Samantha was still chatting and seemed to show no signs of slowing down while her mate waited patiently at her side, clearly content to let her do most of the talking.

“Daddy, look! It’s the guy who hunts bad wolves!”

Bobby’s loud announcement turned more than a few heads in the direction he was pointing, but they all relaxed when they saw that it was just Zander.

The Alpha looked sharp if severely out of place in his leather jacket and jeans, but Darren had never seen a sight that set his heart aflutter the way Zander did walking toward them across the lawn. Darren smoothed down his flyaways as the Alpha came to join them. Zander smiled down at Bobby, but Darren could tell from the look in his eyes that something was weighing heavily on his mind.

“Hey, Bobby. Lookin’ sharp today.”

“Grandma bought me a new suit,” Bobby said, grinning proudly as he smoothed his lapels down.

“It’s very nice,” Zander said with a chuckle, turning to Darren. “You look nice, too.”

Darren’s face turned warm and he hoped it wasn’t as obvious as it felt. “Thanks. So do you.”

Zander looked down at his casual clothes. “I’m not really dressed for the occasion, but I went to the house and no one was there, so I figured you guys might be here.” He tilted his head. “Since when are you the church type?”

“I’m not really,” Darren admitted, looking down at Bobby. “It’s a new ritual, but I think it’s one we’re gonna keep at. We could both use a little stability now.”

“They drink blood out of tiny cups,” Bobby said in a grave tone.

Darren pressed a hand to his forehead. “We might um, need some refresher classes to make up for lost time.”

Zander was obviously trying hard not to laugh. “That’s pretty metal, little dude. Hey, how would you guys feel about going out for lunch?”

“Both of us?” asked Darren. Greg had never liked going out to eat as a family. Even though Bobby was relatively well-behaved for a five-year-old, the Alpha insisted on holding him to adult standards and when Darren wasn’t comfortable with dropping him off at a babysitter’s, date night had become a thing of the past.

“Yeah. If you don’t have other plans.”

“No, let me just go tell my parents,” Darren said, putting Bobby down for long enough to go find his mother. She seemed delighted at the prospect, and Darren felt even guiltier knowing she probably thought that he and Zander were going to get back together now. Darren knew that just because the Alpha was being kind to him and Bobby didn’t mean he still had feelings for Darren—even if the omega himself had realized that he was still just as in love with Zander as he had been the day he’d left.

By the time Darren made it back over to Zander and Bobby, the Alpha was listening and nodding as if he was deeply fascinated by whatever story the boy was telling him. Zander looked up, giving Darren a smile that stopped his heart. “Ready to go?”

“Definitely. What are you two talking about?” he asked, taking Bobby’s hand.

“The little guy was just telling me about his pet brontosaurus,” Zander said matter-of-factly. “I imagine that costs quite a bit to feed.”

Darren gave Bobby a look. “And did you mention that this was one of your pretend stories?”

“No,” Bobby mumbled, looking down at his shoes.

“He has a bit of an imagination,” Darren sighed.

“I did, too, at his age,” Zander laughed. “My mother used to make me write down my stories to get it out of my system so I wouldn’t scare the kids at school.”

“I like writing, too!” said Bobby.

“You do? I bet you’re gonna love school,” Zander said with a smile.

“Daddy says I can go on Monday. I hope it’s better than my old school,” Bobby mumbled.

“Why’s that?”

Darren swallowed hard. He knew what Bobby was going to say.”

“The kids don’t like me,” he said quietly. “I’m weird.”

“You don’t seem weird to me,” Zander said gently. “But I think you’re gonna fit in just fine at this school. I was a pretty weird kid, and I had lots of friends.”

“You did?” Bobby asked, tilting his head. “Like who?”

Darren winced internally. He could hear the pain in Zander’s voice as he answered. “Alpha Dustin and his brother, Alec. Your dad, too.”

“You knew my papa?” The boy’s eyes widened.

The smile Zander gave him broke Darren’s heart all over again. Was it possible to just die from your regrets? “Yeah. We were good friends when we were about your age.”

“I’m gonna make lots of friends,” Bobby said. Darren had never been more grateful for the notoriously short attention span of a kindergartener. “Then I can have my own pack.”

“You know, that sounds like a pretty good start,” Zander chuckled. “Here we are.”

The Alpha opened the door to the family-friendly restaurant and they were immediately seated at a table by the door. Darren found himself relieved they were somewhere with menus that were meant to be drawn on. It was hard not to giggle at the sight of Zander poring over his blue-and-yellow menu.

“What?” the Alpha asked, catching Darren watching him as the waitress placed their food on the table.

“You just look so out of place,” Darren admitted, laughing.

Zander grinned and Darren couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen the Alpha smile that freely. “There was a time when you weren’t exactly the Burger Betty’s type, either.”

“These days, I don’t know what to do with myself at a restaurant where silverware isn’t optional, as you got to see firsthand last night,” Darren teased. He reached over to cut up Bobby’s chicken strips.

“Nah, you’re perfect wherever you go.” Zander looked down at his plate a moment later, blinking. “But uh, you’re cutting up my cheeseburger.”

Darren looked down and dropped his fork and knife when he realized what he was doing. “Oh my gosh,” he muttered. “How humiliating.”

“Hey, at least I won’t choke,” Zander laughed, taking a bite-sized piece of cheeseburger. He winked at Darren and the omega’s heart skipped again.

Bobby had been eating happily, but a sound straight out of a Sci-Fi movie drew his attention to the arcade in the back. “What’s that?”

“Oh man, that’s Space Rage 3000,” Zander said, looking over at the arcade game. He fished into his pocket and pulled out a few quarters, offering them to Bobby. “Why don’t you go check it out and I’ll come over in a second?”

“Okay!” Bobby grabbed the quarters and ran off to play.

“I remember you and Alec spending hours trying to beat each other at that silly game,” Darren laughed.

“Yeah, and then you wanted to go to a movie, so you bet us both that if you beat our score, we’d leave.”

“I did, didn’t I?” Darren smirked. “I seem to recall winning that bet.”

“You wiped the floor with our asses,” Zander scoffed. “Shoulda known after you hustled me at pool.”

“Well, I wasn’t about to go through with what I promised if you won.”

“Hey, at least I always beat you at hoops.”

“Oh, really? See, I remember things a bit differently…”

Zander cocked an eyebrow. “They’ve got a machine back there if you care to put your money where your mouth is,” he said, pointing to the scoreboard and hoop machine in the back.

“As a matter of fact, I do,” Darren said, pushing up from the table. He strutted back into the arcade where Bobby was still playing pinball and stuck a few quarters into the new machine. A few basketballs dropped into the pit and Darren threw one hard at Zander’s chest. “I’ll even let you go first.”

Zander grunted as the ball thumped against his chest. “You’re on,” he said, shooting and sinking his first shot. The Alpha grabbed another ball and stepped back, dribbling between his legs before making his second shot.

“Wow!” Bobby cried, wandering away from the pinball machine to watch them.

Darren rolled his eyes. “Showoff.”

“Don’t hate just because you’re jealous of my athletic prowess,” Zander said, sinking every shot before the timer ran out. He tossed the ball to Darren and put a few more quarters into the machine. “Your turn. Unless you’d like to save face in front of the kid and forfeit now,” he said, holding up his hands. “I am a merciful competitor.”

“Oh, shut up,” Darren scoffed, shoving the Alpha aside with his hip. He tossed a one-handed shot in and it hugged the rim before sinking through.

“Go, dad!” Bobby cheered, jumping up excitedly.

“Not bad,” Zander said, raising his eyebrows. “You’ve gotten better.”

“That was just the warm-up,” Darren said pointedly, turning away from the machine. He propped the ball up on his fingertip and let it spin, grinning when he saw the look of surprise on Bobby’s face. Darren stopped the ball suddenly and threw it back behind him, sinking the shot without looking. He turned to face Zander, grinning when he saw the Alpha’s smug expression turn blank. “Now you can be impressed.”

“I wanna try!” Bobby ran over to the machine and grabbed a ball, flinging it with both hands. It bounced off the plastic casing and he sighed in immediate defeat. “I’m too short.”

“I gotcha,” Zander said, lifting him up so he could reach. “Push it up with your right hand and aim for the scoreboard.”

Bobby furrowed his brow in focus and tossed the ball. This time, it went through the hoop.

“Nice job!” Zander cried, setting Bobby down to give him a high-five.

“I rocked it!” Bobby cried triumphantly.

“You sure did,” Zander laughed. “Keep practicing and you’ll be good enough for the school team in no time.”

Bobby ran back to the pinball machine to ride the wave of his recent victory. Darren turned back to Zander, smiling. “You’re good with kids.”

“Guess being an uncle is good practice,” he said, running his hand through his hair. “I know you didn’t want kids before, but you turned out to be a pretty awesome dad.”

“I didn’t know what I wanted back then,” Darren admitted. “And thanks, but this whole time, I’ve felt like the world’s worst parent.”

Zander frowned. “Why?”

“When Greg pushed Bobby the night before we left, it was a wakeup call, but it shouldn’t have taken that.” Darren could sense the rage through their link and he was shocked to realize that it still existed. He’d been so upset the other night, it had been hard to tell what was him and what was Zander. “I should have left a long time ago. I kept telling myself it was better for him if I just stayed, if I --” His voice cracked, and he took a moment to steady himself. “If I just stopped doing shit that pissed him off, Bobby would have what he needed. That I could keep things stable, and keep him from facing the consequences of my mistakes.”

As surprised as Darren was when Zander pulled him into his arms, he found himself leaning into the Alpha’s embrace. In an instant, he felt safe and warm and loved, even if the latter was an illusion. It was the way he’d always felt in Zander’s arms, no matter how much they’d fought and no matter how far he’d pushed the Alpha. Sometimes he’d tried. He’d picked fights and poked at sore spots to try to push Zander into snapping the way Greg did or leaving the way his father had. In the end, Zander would just pull him into his arms and tell him it didn’t matter. That he didn’t want to fight anymore, and it wasn’t worth it. Even now, after every wound he’d inflicted on the Alpha’s heart, Zander was there, comforting him.

He didn’t deserve this man. He never had, not as a friend, not as a lover, not as a mate.

“It wasn’t your fault.” Zander’s voice was rough with anger, but his touch was gentle as he stroked Darren’s hair. “What he did, that was all him. I’m just glad you got out of there when you did.”

Darren nodded, sniffing. He didn’t want to get Zander’s shirt wet with his tears. At least he didn’t have to worry about his eyeliner smudging anymore. He pulled away, but Zander’s hands remained on his waist and Darren didn’t want to move away. He found himself frozen in the Alpha’s gaze, feeling the magnetism between them. It had never faded. In fact, if anything, it was even stronger than he remembered. How had he ever stayed away this long?

Zander leaned in so close that Darren could feel the Alpha’s breath on his lips. One look in Zander’s eyes and he knew that by some miracle, the other man wanted the contact as much as he did.

“Daddy, I’m tired,” Bobby said, wandering over.

Zander and Darren quickly stepped apart.

“Okay, sweetheart,” Darren said breathlessly. Had Zander really come that close to kissing him? And he’d been so close to returning it…

“I’ll go pay the bill,” Zander said, clearing his throat before he walked over to the counter.

Bobby yawned, taking his father’s hand. “I like your friend, daddy.”

Darren smiled, lifting the boy into his arms. “So do I, kiddo. So do I.”

By the time the trio walked back to Darren’s parents’ house, Bobby was fast asleep in the omega’s arms. “Thank you for today,” Darren said, turning to face Zander at the end of the driveway. “I can’t remember the last time either of us had that much fun.”

“Me either,” Zander said with that sheepish smile. It was the one thing about him that hadn’t changed since he was a lanky kid working the counter at the drugstore. “Oh,” he said suddenly, as if he was just remembering. “I almost forgot the reason I came to find you in the first place.”

“Oh?”

“I got in contact with that lawyer, the one who specializes in custody cases?”

Darren nodded anxiously. “Does he think he can help?”

“He wouldn’t give me an answer over the phone, but I explained the situation and he says he wants to meet with us both in person. I know it’s short notice, but would tomorrow be okay?”

“Of course. I have to drop Bobby off at school, but as long as it’s between then and three, I can come.”

“Great. I’ll pick you up at nine.” Zander hesitated and seemed like he wanted to say something else. Instead, he nodded and took a step back onto the sidewalk. “Enjoy the rest of your afternoon.”

“You, too,” Darren said softly. He watched as the Alpha disappeared before heading inside the house. The next day of waiting was going to be pure torture, but he reminded himself it was nothing compared to the six years he’d condemned Zander to.