Chapter 2
Damian
“I should be out there living by the seat of my pants. You know what they say?” Blaine was a colleague and someone that I found it necessary to confide in.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” There was no reason why he should and it wasn’t like he had the respect of his peers.
“I’ve lived more than anybody and this feels like a step down. They say that those that can’t do teach and that doesn’t apply to me.” I felt trapped like an animal. I wanted to gnaw my arm off to get away from the tedious boredom of day to day life.
“Damian, there’s no shame in taking this position for the interim. Your divorce was ugly and cost you half of what you earn. You no longer have the luxury of taking the assignments that catch your attention. Living beyond your means makes it necessary for you to jump at this opportunity.” I thought that I was doing the right thing. Blaine had been quite convincing.
The money was nothing to sneeze at, but the classroom didn’t hold the appeal of real life. These kids had to learn there was more to life than textbooks.
“It’s easy for you to say and you’ve never had the need to keep up with the Joneses. If I only took your advice, I probably wouldn’t be here.” Blaine was the only one who had the balls to tell me what he thought when I was marrying for the first time. It was the reason why we had lost touch. I couldn’t have his negative energy.
Looking at Blaine, I was reminded of the stuffy professor that I had before I finally broke free of academia. I had no interest in wearing glasses or sporting a coat with patches on the elbows. If I was going to do this then I was going to do this my way.
“I tried to tell you, but you wouldn’t listen to me. Everybody has to learn the hard way. I’m not one to tell you I told you so. Unfortunately, it means that you’re going to have to bite the bullet and walk into that classroom with your head held high.” Blaine was giving me a pep talk over a caffeine injection right into my veins.
The coffee was black and was the perfect pick me up to give me the courage to start this new chapter in my life. I had tried dating, but they were already jaded from past relationships. They were looking for the quick fix.
“I don’t need to rehash history. I did sneak a peek at some of the new recruits last week at registration. I honestly don’t see any potential. I would be very surprised to see anybody rise to the cream of the crop.” It wasn’t fair of me to make snap judgments. There could be a diamond in the rough and it was just a matter of polishing off the rough exterior.
“I really don’t have time to hold your hand.” I gave him a dirty look and he whistled a happy tune going out the door.
I went into the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror hoping that I would recognize the man that I used to be before she took my nuts. I was a little weathered around the eyes, but I still had my hair and I was in relatively good health.
I was going to be a breath of fresh air in the classroom. I was hitting my stride at 45. I looked younger like I had found the fountain of youth. I improvised by using my environment as my own personal gym. I liked to think of myself as an innovator and I was never in one place long enough to have a gym membership.
I moved my hands through my hair and looked at how dejected my eyes looked. I had to put this past me and my friends kept telling me the best way to do that was to get underneath someone. I was pretty selective and Jennifer had been the only one to tie me down to a commitment.
I was like the honey bee flitting from one flower to another to pollinate before moving on.
I rolled up the sleeves of my white shirt, taking off the red tie and unbuttoning the first couple of buttons. The black pants were perfectly accented by my belt with a silver skull on the buckle. It was my way of defiantly snubbing my nose at authority.
I walked down the hallway carrying the brand new briefcase in brown leather. It was given to me by my father. He was living in an assisted care home for the elderly. Amazingly, he wasn’t wilting away and had blossomed by becoming the Casanova of the group. He proved to me age was only a number.
Looking out the window, I saw the cherry red 98 Wrangler Jeep. I breathed a sigh of relief that I was able to keep it after the divorce. I had to beg on bended knee to keep it out of her hands. Of course, I had to give something back in return which turned out to be a priceless collection of rare books by Shakespeare.
I had already read the volumes and it seemed pointless to keep them around gathering dust. I was never going to pick them up again and I couldn’t say the same thing about the Jeep calling my name.
It was my guilty pleasure for hitting the open road whenever the urge came over me. Putting the top down and letting the wind blow through my hair took me back to my teenage years of being carefree.
These kids had no idea what they were in store for when they finally were ready to make their mark in the world. I had to prepare them for the never ending rejection. It was my job to give them the tools. What they did with them was entirely in their hands.
I had noticed one girl last week firing on all cylinders. Her body was banging and worth a second look. I found myself mesmerized by her eyes and everything below the waist had me hungering for something off limits.
Staring at her, I recognized the need unfurling in my pants and I wanted desperately to cross the line of good taste. I think she knew I was there. I stood no more than a few feet away from her and yet it felt like she was just out of reach. The university was a smorgasbord of fresh young faces. It would be like taking candy from a baby. I just didn’t get that impression from her and the challenge was easily the highlight of my day.
This job was nothing to me. It was a means to an end. The first chance I got, I would be on the first flight to some war ravaged country at the expense of my editor. There were too many freelance photographers without journalistic integrity. It was something vastly lacking from the next generation which I hoped to instill in their young minds.
I was at the door to the threshold and I steeled myself for the unnerving looks in my direction. Some would know me by reputation and others would learn through the power of the internet.
I was looking for something that I couldn’t get from my wife. We had a daughter just entering her first year in college. She had cast aside any of our hopes by going to a party school in Miami.
These kids underneath this roof had no choice. Most of them were crippled by financial hardships. They would grab onto just about anything to break free of the depressing Chicago winters.
“I know some of you are expecting this to be a cakewalk. I won’t be following any kind of curriculum. I have been given the freedom to show you what real journalism is all about. I’m going to place you within the stories and make you live them through the eyes of the subjects. I’m fair but harsh when it comes to grades. I don’t believe in grading on a curve. You do the work, excel at it and we’ll never have a problem where I will have to call you after class.” I wasn’t even looking at them and they were pretty much faceless strangers.
I strode with a confidence that I didn’t feel I had. I scrawled my name on the blackboard in bold letters so that anybody could see it even if they were sitting at the back of the class. I opened the briefcase and took out the necessary teaching supplies.
“If you can’t handle hard work then you know where the door is. This might be a night class, but I still take this seriously. Those who are here because you want a pat on the back then I suggest you turn around and go back out the same way you came.” I felt in my element. Having this kind of control made me feel like I had their futures in the palm of my hand.
“I was wondering what your position is regarding the story you did in Nicaragua.” The feminine tone caught me off guard. I had no idea anybody even remembered. It was a harrowing ordeal and had me a prisoner of a contingent of soldiers for almost three weeks.
“I don’t have time to get into the details.” I turned my attention to the girl who had asked the question. I was quite surprised to see that it was the same young impressionable face I had seen at registration last week. Her name was Rita.