Jacob strode forward, confusion on his features. “But you—” He scanned my face. “You’re still human. You—”
“I mean, you’re too late. I’ve already made up my mind.”
Jonathan came in quietly behind him and shared a look with David.
David gestured to the door. “I can just…give you some space.”
“No.” I spun to him. “We don’t need space. There’s only one thing we can do and—”
“There isn’t,” Jacob snapped. “This isn’t the only solution. You—”
“Please,” I said quietly. “I don’t want to fight about this. I made my decision, and if you can support me, I don’t know what else there is to say.”
“I support you. I do,” Jacob said, holding his hands out like he wasn’t sure whether to touch me or stay where he was. “But, please…please don’t do this.”
David was inching toward the door, sharing looks with Jonathan that said he didn’t know what to do.
“You can’t leave,” I said. “You said you’d help me.”
Jacob whipped around to David. “You said you’d change him? You don’t even know what you’re doing—you could kill him—”
“I didn’t say—I mean, I said I’d help. I didn’t—”
“Stop.” Jonathan stepped in between them. He reached back to set his hand on David’s hip. “This isn’t helping. No one is doing anything unless we know what’s going on. I suggest you figure it out soon, though, because we have other things to deal with.”
I pleaded with him with my eyes. “You’re right. The hunter is coming. Maya saw him. I can’t—” My voice broke. “I can’t let him hurt Jacob. You have to understand.”
Jonathan’s eyes went soft. “I understand. I know what it’s like to want to protect the person you care for. But there are several of us. It’s not just Jacob against the hunter. We have a whole clan.”
“And I would be one more person who could help.”
David peeked around Jonathan’s shoulder. “I understand where he’s coming from. I couldn’t stand by and watch while Jonathan was fighting and do nothing. I can’t stand the thought of losing him.”
“He won’t—” Jacob broke off and turned to me. “You won’t lose me. We’re stronger than you think. And we’ll figure out what to do.”
“You can’t know that. You told me yourself that hunters were strong. They were born to kill vampires. They could kill you.”
Jacob stepped forward. “Hawk.”
“No. Don’t. You have no idea what it was like to almost see my mom die when I was a kid. If I had to do that again with you, it’ll kill me. I can’t watch someone else I love die.”
Jacob froze, his mouth dropping open at the words.
“Yes,” I told him, my voice softening. “I said love. I love you, and I won’t stand by and watch you get hurt.”
He stepped forward, arms coming around me in a hug that nearly took my breath away. “I love you too,” he whispered in my ear. “I never thought I’d be able to say that to someone else again, but I love you.”
I kissed him, and then cupped his cheeks with my hands. “Then please, please understand this. Understand why I need to do this. I can’t lose you.”
“I can’t lose you either.”
I swallowed and nodded. “We’ll be stronger together.”
His gaze dropped for a long moment, but when it came back up, he nodded. “Okay. All right. As long as everyone agrees, we’ll change you.” Jacob turned to Jonathan. “Get in touch with the others.”
The relief that hit me was swift and almost painful. David smiled at me from over Jonathan’s shoulder, and I blew out a slow breath. I wasn’t going to admit it, but I was terrified.
I was about to become a vampire, and my whole life was going to change.
***
“Are you sure you want to do this?” Jacob asked as we sat in a spare bedroom in his house.
It smelled a little musty in here like no one had used it for a long time. It didn’t matter. It was just a place for my transition. A place to die and a place to come alive again.
“I’m sure,” I told him from my position on the bed.
“You’re shaking.”
I couldn’t help it. My hand trembled in his. It hadn’t stopped since we’d left David’s house. “I’m fine.”
“We don’t have to do this.”
“Please. We already decided.” I pulled my hand from his. “Maybe you shouldn’t be here. Maybe Jonathan—”
“No. I’m doing this.”
“It’s okay if you don’t. I don’t want this to be hard for you.”
His mention of the word hard stopped me. That was why I was nervous. Because not only was it going to change everything, but because it might hurt. Because I didn’t know what to expect.
David said it hadn’t hurt when he’d done it, but Jonathan had also told me it was different for everyone.
“So…” I gave him a wry smile. “How does this work?”
“There are a few ways, especially depending on the strength and age of a vampire,” he said.
My smile widened. “You’re really old.”
To my relief, he laughed. “Yes, I am. Which means I’m powerful. My blood will change you easily. I’ll drink yours and you’ll drink mine.”
“You mean…I don’t have to die with your blood in my system?” I asked, feeling less worried.
“You will die. I will drink your blood until your heart stops beating. And then I’ll give my blood to you. Long enough that the brain is still alive, but the heart is finished working.”
I breathed in deeply and blew it out. It didn’t sound better when he said it like that. My heart had to stop beating. That was terrifying.
“I’ll help you,” Jacob said.
There was a knock on the door and Jonathan peeked his head in. “We’ll be right outside if you need anything.”
Just in case, was what he wasn’t saying. In case something went wrong.
But I only nodded at Jacob. “I trust you,” I told him.
He got onto the bed with me, laying at my side. “Relax. It’ll only hurt for a moment, and then you won’t know anything but bliss.”
He kissed my lips, and I returned the kiss, sliding my tongue into his mouth. Taking this last moment of closeness. He moved his lips to my cheek, and then shifted so he was caressing my neck.
I sighed, already feeling bliss.
And then he bit me.
My breath caught in my throat. Alarm bells went off in my head, and I tensed up, but Jacob caressed my shoulder, then rubbed my back.
“Relax,” he murmured.
He soothed me with his voice, and suddenly there were images in my head. We were walking in the forest, the sun spearing through the trees, and my hand was in his. He brought it to his lips and kissed it.
The pain vanished and I was filled with love for him. He smiled at me and wrapped his arms around me. All I could feel was him. All I could see was our future. Happiness. Thousands of lifetimes together.
“I love you,” Jacob said to me.
“I love you, too.”
I leaned in as he did, accepting his kiss. It was warm on my lips and I drank it in. I let myself go in his arms because I’d never felt anything better than to be near him.
After a moment, I felt his lips brush my ear. “Open your eyes, Hawk.”
I frowned. Open my eyes? Why? I wanted to stay right here with him forever.
“Hawk,” he said again. “Look at me.”
I forced my eyes open, and everything was dark. With a gasp, I sat up on the bed. The room came into focus around me, objects I hadn’t noticed before sharp and full of color I shouldn’t have been able to see with the kind of light in the room.
It was dark, with only a bedside lamp on, but I could see everything.
Jacob’s face came into view. He set his hands on my shoulders. The familiar warmth was there when he touched me, and that was reassuring. As was his voice.
“Hawk,” he said carefully. “Are you okay?”
“I feel…I feel different.”
Even his features were more defined. And I felt like I had so much energy. Like I could run for miles.
“That’s because I changed you.”
I blinked up at him. “What? But—it—it’s just been a few minutes.”
He smiled gently. “No. It’s been eight hours. It’s nearly morning.”
“But I just closed my eyes. And I—I saw you—”
“I put that image there. So you wouldn’t feel anything.”
I touched my neck, where I knew he’d bitten me, but the skin was smooth. “I didn’t feel anything,” I told me. “I thought you couldn’t influence me.”
“Not with my mind—or not only with my mind and no other connection. But we were linked. Through blood. I guess it’s more powerful that way.” He smiled gently. “Regardless, it worked.”
“It did?”
“Yes. Hawk, you’re a vampire.”