Chapter Thirteen

 

“Dinner was scrumptious and this resort is beautiful. I can’t believe Gideon sold it,” I said as we walked toward the resort, a blanket under his arm from the hotel room. Gideon set us up in a room at Orchid Reef Resort, which he sold to the current owners a few years back. Lei used to be the general manager here, until the unexpected death of the manager at Kupid’s Arrow. Gideon brought Lei over to Kupid’s Arrow, and sold this resort for millions.

“Their surf and turf here is legendary. I used to fly over with Gideon once a month or so and do some cooking and training with the staff. I miss it, to be honest, but I do have my hands full at Kupid’s Table.” He tapped his chin with his free hand. “Let’s see, now you love Mahi-Mahi, lobster, and shrimp; all creatures who swim in the sea.”

I bumped shoulders with him as we walked through the sand. “You’re a real comedian. Apparently, Minnesotans don’t know how to cook seafood. It’s certainly growing on me.”

“Anything else growing on you?” he asked, his voice husky.

It took me a moment to catch his drift, but when I did, I smiled in the darkness. “Blooming might be a better word for it.”

“I’ll take blooming,” he whispered, kissing my cheek. “Do you want to go in the hot tub when we get back to the room?” he asked, his hand tightening on my waist.

“Our private one?” I asked. Gideon had put us in a room with a two-person corner jacuzzi in the suite. “I can’t get in it, to be honest. It’s too high and there are no stairs.”

“I’ll lift you in. I’m hoping it might relax your leg and let me massage it.”

“I used to use the hot tub in physical therapy and it did relax it. I still use the one at the resort, but only when no one else is around. I’m self-conscious about all the scars.”

He kissed my head as we stepped carefully onto the path, and picked up my crutches. “I understand why you feel self-conscious, even though everyone would understand. It doesn’t bother me, though. I want you to know I’m not put off by the scars. Okay?”

“I don’t know how you aren’t. It’s a web of destruction and missing a significant chunk of meat from the thigh.”

He rubbed my arm as we walked. “It bothers me in the aspect of how much it had to have hurt when it happened and what you went through, but only, and I mean only, in that aspect. I’m not repulsed by it in the least. If anything, it’s a badge of honor you should carry proudly. You survived, sweetheart. That said, before we get to the doctor tomorrow, you should probably tell me what happened,” he said as we strolled through the lobby to the elevators.

The elevator was filled when we stepped on, so I stayed mute on the ride to the sixth floor, waiting until we were alone to discuss it. He swiped us into the room, holding his hand out for me to wait as soon as we were in the door. He did a fast tour of the suite to make sure there were no surprises and then motioned me in. I sat on the edge of the bed and slipped my shoes off, being careful of the sand rattling around in the bottom. He rested his butt on the edge of the bed next to me and I sighed.

I dug my phone out and he pointed at it. “What are you doing?”

I busied myself on the browser without making eye contact. “Showing you what happened.”

His hand shot out and he stilled my hand. “I don’t want to see pictures, baby.”

“No, not of my leg. It’s easier to show you this picture than explain how bad the damage was. A guy used a .357 magnum Hydra-Shok and shot it point blank, which is what Jarrett did to my leg, into a Christmas ham.” I held the phone out to him and he held it close to his face, his breath catching in his chest.

“Lord have mercy, Rose. This is what your leg looked like?”

He set the phone down as I hiked up my dress to show him my thigh. “The bullet hit here,” I said, pointing at a hole which had scarred over with fibrous tissue, “but it blossomed once it broke the skin and turned the tissue in my thigh to liquid, essentially. The doctors had to clean this whole area away,” I said, making a circle motion over the inside of my leg. “It’s the fleshy part, but I didn’t have a lot there to start with, so now—”

He palpated the area gently with his fingers. “Now it’s skin on bone there.”

“Basically, but they didn’t have a lot of options. The bullet missed the bone, luckily, or I would have lost my leg. Unfortunately, it bounced around and damaged my femoral nerve which branches into the saphenous nerve going down the leg. They did the best they could with repairing the damage, but there was only so much they could do. The rest is up to my body to regenerate or not. My foot turning outward is concerning, but it likely has more to do with the loss of feeling in my leg. If I turn my foot outward I have a better sense of where it is on the ground and I can stay upright.”

“Wait, you can’t feel your leg?” he asked, confused. “How come it hurts then?”

I laid back on the bed, my feet still touching the floor. “Nerves are funny things, Sawyer. You can be paralyzed and still have nerve pain. You can be an amputee and feel the foot or arm as if it were still there, because the nerves think it is. It’s my lot in life for being dumb and not seeing the warning signs before I got involved with him.”

He laid beside me on his elbow and rested his hand on my chest. “Don’t say that, Rose. You didn’t ask him to shoot you. A man doesn’t shoot a woman in cold blood. He’s an animal, and you couldn’t predict what he would do. Did you see any signs of a personality disorder before that night?”

I shook my head. “No, which was the confusing part. It’s like he snapped when I told him I was pregnant. The first thing he did was punch me in the stomach, twice. I was on the floor, already cramping, knowing my baby was dying when he shot me. I don’t remember a lot of it, but I distinctly remember him saying he wouldn’t let me ruin his life. I remember the pain in my stomach and the blood as it poured from me.”

He caught a tear with his finger. “I can’t find the words to tell you how much I wish you hadn’t gone through this trauma. It kills me inside to see you in pain and not be able to help you, and I don’t mean only the physical pain. Emotionally you live with this every minute of the day. I don’t know how you stay sane, probably because you’re stronger than I could ever hope to be. Let me take care of you tonight. Let me carry the burden for a few hours. I want to give you some peace.”

My lips trembled, but I nodded. “I’d like to spend time with you without thinking or worrying about the outside world.”

He kissed me, his lips tender as he made love to my mouth the way I dreamed he’d one day make love to my body. “I’m going to get the jets going in the Jacuzzi and then I’ll help you in. Do you have a suit?”

I eyed him curiously. “We’re supposed to wear a suit in a private jacuzzi?”

He held his hands up against his chest. “Only if you want to,” he answered, then spun around and turned the bubbles on in the tub, letting them swish the heated water around for a bit. We had the forethought to fill the tub earlier in case we wanted to use it tonight. The question still hung in the air. Did I want to wear a suit? Did I want to get into a jacuzzi with him in my birthday suit? Was I ready for what might happen if I did? I suspected I wouldn’t be able to answer that question until the moment was upon me. Do I love him? Yes. Do I trust him? Surprisingly, yes. I hadn’t reached a decision when he strode back to the bed and pointed at the bathroom.

“I’ll be right back.”

I nodded and stared at his receding backside, which by all rights was enough reason to pray he decided to wear his birthday suit, too. He worked out religiously, and a girl could definitely appreciate his efforts. I quickly shucked my dress, bra, and panties, crutching to the tub. If I could get up on the edge of the tub balancing on my crutches, I could fall into the water and hide under the bubbles. When he came out he wouldn’t know if I was dressed or not. I made several attempts to swing my good leg over the edge, but each time I slipped back to the carpet, the lip a hair too tall for my tiny frame. I would have to wait for him to help me in, which meant I should put a suit on. Before I could move he strode back into the room, his clothes gone and his lower half barely covered in a Speedo. He had two towels and laid them near the edge of the tub. In his scantily clad outfit, it was easy to see his reaction to my nakedness. He stalked toward me and stopped a few feet away, his eyes closing and his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down as he steeled himself.

“You’re so damn beautiful, Rose,” he whispered, his eyes still closed. “I’m not even ashamed standing here hard before you. Do you see the incredible power you have over me?”

His eyes opened and he took my crutches, bracing my hands on the tub while he laid them down. “I’m going to lift you up and over, then you settle where it’s comfortable.”

I wrapped my arms around his neck and he seamlessly lifted me over the edge, setting me into the water. The heat and bubbles instantly soothed my tired leg, and I leaned back against the edge, moaning softly.

“Incredible. I need one of these at home,” I sighed, as he joined me in the tub.

He chuckled. “I think you should tell Gideon it would help in your recovery. He would have one for you the next day.”

“Which is the reason I don’t say anything. I already feel guilty enough about all the money and time they’ve spent on me. I can never repay them for saving my life.”

He lifted my bad leg and laid it over his lap, not touching it, but propping it so it was elevated. “They don’t want you to feel guilty or to pay them back. They have this inability to separate themselves from a friend in need. I’ve seen it over and over with them. Gideon pulled Mally out of homelessness and paid for his schooling, then gave him a job, all because he was willing to drive Kate to the hospital as she lay bleeding in the back of his taxi cab. I’ve seen it when Lei was being stalked and threatened. Gideon flew a private investigator over and paid for full-time security until Lei was safe again. I have story after story of Gideon and Kate helping the people on this island. They’ve been fortunate and they like to give back. When Kate was given a second chance, they vowed to use their fortune to do good. They’ve taken care of you, and now you’re giving back to their resort by implementing a project the likes of which no other resort on the island has ever seen. In a matter of a year you’ll have brought in more revenue for the resort than they ever spent saving your life, and that’s only one year. You have to stop feeling guilty or it’s going to eat you alive.”

I lay in the warm, bubbly water and considered what he said. “I suppose you’re right. Sometimes it’s hard to see the end game when I’m still in the middle of the final quarter. My leg isn’t healing and Jarrett is out there taunting me somewhere. I struggle to remember it won’t be this way forever. Eventually, if Jarret is cau—”

“When Jarrett is caught,” he insisted and I held up my hand.

“When Jarrett is caught, maybe it will be easier to plan a future. Right now, I spend every moment in fear of when the next bullet is going to rip through my flesh.”

His arms encircled me before I saw him move. “Not going to happen,” he said through gritted teeth. “I will take the bullet before I let him hurt you again. Do you understand me. No one will ever hurt you again.”

“I’m trying to believe, Sawyer, but it’s going to take some time,” I whispered, his warm, wet chest heaving under my cheek.

His arms loosened and then released me as he leaned back against the tub, his hands going under the water to run lightly up and down my leg. “Will it cause a problem if I do this? Does it hurt?” he asked, his touch tentative as his fingers trailed across the lumpy flesh.

“The water is relaxing the muscles which are usually tight and unforgiving. You aren’t hurting me,” I answered, my head resting on the tub and my breasts floating at the top of the water line.

“I’m glad the water is helping relax it. You need to find something you can use when it gets to be too much. I’m going to talk to Gideon about getting a jacuzzi tub put in your apartment.”

I grasped his arm. “Please, don’t. I can use the one in the workout room when it gets bad enough. I don’t want any special treatment. Please. Besides, when you buried my leg in the sand the other night, I discovered how sand conducts the heat. I can always spend time on the beach with you if need be.”

He gazed into my eyes for the longest time, but finally relented. “For now,” he said. “But we’ll revisit it after we see the doctor tomorrow. We need to do whatever he suggests, even if it means we have to spend some money. I have a bigger apartment than you, and I can always put a small portable hot tub in the corner for you to use.”

“We?” I asked, surprised by his words. “Your apartment?”

He nodded. “I’m in this with you for the long haul, Rose. I won’t give up on you and I won’t give up on us. You deserve happiness, and so do I.”

“And I make you happy?” I asked, as he tucked his hand over the edge of my thigh and let his hand settle there. He was dangerously close to my mound and I had to swallow when I let my mind wander to what it would feel like to have him touch me.

He leaned on the edge of the tub with his shoulder, his lips making contact with my neck. When I turned my head, he caught my lips with his and his hand caressed my face. “The last eight months have been pure torture wanting to be with you, but not wanting to scare you. Even as I struggled to break into your heart, it still made me happy to see you. When Gideon told me I would have to work with you in order to get a daycare center kitchen and menu completed, I saw it as an opportunity. I had a reason to get to know you, and show you how much I care about you. I didn’t know if it would work out between us, but I knew I had to try. You make me happy every time I think about you, which is basically all the time, you might as well know. You feel like your world is in turmoil right now, but I’ve never been happier. I’ve never been with a woman like you, Rose. It’s a heady, sexy, overpowering feeling of love when I hold you.”

My hand went to his face, dripping water down his cheek and onto his shoulder as my lips sought his. His hand brushed my breast as it floated lazily on the bubbles and I moaned against his lips. His hand abandoned its shoring on my shoulder and grasped the tender mound of flesh, barely big enough to fill his hand, but sensitive enough to set me on fire.

He shifted on the seat and lifted me by my waist, settling me on his lap, letting my leg float free in the water. His hardness pulsed against my thigh and I stroked it lightly, not expecting the hiss that escaped his lips. 

"You stood naked before me, trusting your whole self to me, and I was a goner," he whispered, his lips leaving mine to tease the nipple floating near them. He sucked, kissed and massaged until I wanted to explode from the pleasure of his touch. I arched my back and he used his left hand to brace me while his right hand slithered below the water, his lips back on mine. I could feel his hand hovering on my belly. "I want to touch you. Will that scare you?" he asked.

I tossed my head back and forth. “I need you to touch me,” I begged, lost in the moment.

His tongue plunged into my mouth at the same moment his hand settled on my mound. I reached inside his Speedo and gripped him, a growl ripping from his throat. His hand stilled on me and he sank his teeth into my shoulder gently. "We have to stop, now, or I won't be able to," he panted, kissing away the sting left behind from his nip.

"I don't want to stop," I whispered, keeping a firm grip on him. "I just want to feel."

His hand left the water to cup my cheek. "I don't want to hurt your leg again. I haven't figured out how not to yet."

"I have," I said, kissing him between words. "The water makes us weightless, and with no gravity there will be no spasms."

He closed his eyes and I took advantage of the moment, slipping below the water to take him between my lips. His hips bucked and his hands searched under the water for me, but I stayed with my task until I ran out of air. I floated back to the surface, and he grabbed me, a naughty smile on his face. 

"You, little lady, have one hell of a sexy side," he said, holding my waist. "Are you sure?" 

"I need you, Sawyer," I begged. He stood, and transferred to a seat by the towels, holding me on his lap.

"Tell me first. Condom?" he asked, kissing my lips, getting sidetracked when his tongue darted into my mouth. 

His hand searched in the towels while he kissed me and came up with a silver packet. My eyes traveled to it, but before I could answer, he had it open and on. He held my waist, lowering me over him, our gazes locked. His tip rested at my entrance and his hand held my face as he entered me. 

"I'm always going to protect you, Rose," he cried.

Then words ceased and our hearts took over.