Dane, Dylan, and Drew, don’t look happy at all.
In fact, the three of them look downright murderous. Dane glances between his brothers before tilting his head to the side, watching me. “Is it true, Mills? Did some asshole call you a slut in the cafeteria?”
God, the rumor mill in this place is on fire today.
Drew’s nostrils flare, reminding me of a bull ready to charge. I know his expressions and he must be holding down some serious anger right now. “Who was it? I’ll fucking murder him,” he growls.
Dylan, his eyes narrowed at me, nods. “He won’t ever say shit like that to you again, Mills. Tell us who it was.”
I know that their hearts are in the right place but I need this like I need a hole in the head right now. I’ve got enough negative attention on me. If the triplets storm in there and start beating on Connor, it’s only going to fuel the gossiping.
“What? We’re serious, Milly. Who was it?” Dane adds.
“It doesn’t matter. I’m okay, really. He was just being a dick, that’s all.”
Clearly, this isn’t enough for them. “Mills,” Drew growls. “If you don’t tell us, we’re just going to find out about it from someone else.” I shake my head but it doesn’t dissuade them. “Was someone in the team?” My expression must flicker something because I see his eyes change. “I’m right, aren’t I? It’s someone on the team. Goddammit, big mouth assholes.”
“Who was it, Milly?”
I sigh. It might have been Connor who called me out but it wasn’t like the rest of their team mates stepped in to defend me. Thing is that I don’t feel like being the reason the team loses its focus and possibly even the next game. Around here, something like that will give you a worse reputation than sleeping with your stepbrothers. “It was Connor,” I say. There’s a collective angry sound. I don’t think any of them are surprised because he’s got a reputation for being a loud mouth idiot. “But I don’t need you to do anything about it, okay? It’s just going to make things worse. They don’t seem to hear me passed the red veil of rage and I have to launch myself at the three of them as they spin around to head toward the cafeteria. “Wait!”
I don’t want them to do anything that could get them kicked off the team. The idea of trying to have that conversation with Richard and my mom makes me cringe.
But it’s no use—I’m nothing compared to one of them moving at the angry pace of a rhino charging—much less the three of them combined. I’m damn near tearing at the hem of Drew’s shirt, desperately grasping onto Dylan’s back pocket.
And when my phone rings loudly in my own pocket, I grit my teeth. Talk about some shitty timing! I can tell by the little jingle that it’s my mom, so I let it ring, still trying to get Dane, Dylan, and Drew to stop.
“The motherfucker is going down,” Drew hisses to his brothers.
“Guys, seriously! Just stop!” I dash in front of them, the only thing I can do to catch their attention. “This isn’t going to solve anything.”
“Doesn’t have to. As long as Connor’s bleeding. A lot,” Dane replies, surprising me. The other two I could maybe see pummeling some guy on my behalf, but Dane? He’s usually just a big teddy bear. My throat constricts at how much they want to defend me.
“Are you going to answer that?” Dylan says nodding to my pocket which is lighting up and ringing yet again.
I hold my hands up. “Stay put. Just for a minute. Seriously,” I add, seeing the three of them looking around and over me. Mom’s name is at the top of the screen. “Hey, Mom.”
There’s a deep breath before she says anything. “Milly, hi, baby. Listen, I uh, I’ve got some bad news.”
Those are words I never want to hear coming from her mouth. My stomach does a flip. “What kind of bad news?”
And just like that, my stepbrothers are at my side, listening intently, the fire in their eyes doused, for now.
“I just got off the phone with Amanda, and she had to take Nana to the hospital. She’s…not doing well. The doctor’s say that it’s a severe stroke, and she can barely talk. I don’t know baby. She just doesn’t look good. I think we need to get over to the hospital. Quickly. I don’t think she has much time left, Milly.” She sounds so exhausted and wary, and her voice is clogged with the sound of unshed tears.
I swallow hard. The phone shakes in my hands as I hold it up against my face. “Okay,” I manage to say.
“Okay,” she agrees. “I’m really tired and I’ve got to get organized, so Rich will text you and the boys the details. Have them bring you, okay, honey? I love you.”
I haven’t seen my grandmother in a couple of months, not with school going on. I was supposed to go help her clean up her garage after my last final exam. Dane, Dylan, and Drew are watching me, as though they’re ready for me to fall apart. “What’s going on?” one of them asks gently.
I can’t bring myself to look at them, vaguely aware of the wetness on my cheeks. “It’s my Nana. She had a bad stroke. Mom said I need to get to the hospital now… I just can’t believe this. She was totally fine when I talked to her on the phone a few weeks ago!”
“Oh, shit, Mills.” I’m pulled into Dane’s arms just before I break down and cry. Sobbing against his chest, he holds me close. I feel other hands on my back, supporting me.
“Do you know where she is? Which hospital?” Dylan asks.
“Ask your Dad. He knows,” I whisper.
Dane lifts my chin up until I’m staring up into his eyes. “We’ll get you there, don’t worry, okay?”
I nod, watching as Dylan calls Rich, his voice low over the phone as he turns away. The muscles are twitching in Drew’s jaw as he watches everything. I know he’s still angry about Connor, but it’ll all be forgotten now while I deal with something so much more important.
--
I’ve never liked hospitals. The last time I was inside of one was when I was a kid and fractured my elbow during cheer practice. The stark scent of antiseptic, all the faded white everywhere you look. It’s enough to make anyone sick, ironically.
Pushing past the curtain inside room 308, I hold my breath. No one’s paying attention to me and the guys when we step into the room, they’re all busy huddled around Nana’s hospital bed. My mom leans in closest to her head, listening to whatever she’s trying to say, while my Auntie Amanda stands with her arms wrapped around her skinny shoulders, not bothering to hide the silent sobs.
It takes a moment for me to realize that Rich has settled against the wall by me. He leans forward and pulls me into a quick hug. “I’m glad you got here.” Behind me, he whispers to the guys. “Let’s leave them to it. Wait in the lobby. I’ll go grab some coffee for everyone.”
The four of them walk out of the room, someone laying a hand on my shoulder and squeezing before I hear the door shut quietly. It’s then that both my mom and Auntie Amanda look up and see me shuffling from one foot to the other. Mom’s face softens.
Taking my cue, I take a few steps closer until I’m at the foot of the bed. Nana’s skin is an ashy gray color, nothing at all like what I’m used to, with all the pink and freckles. She’s always careful to make sure her hair looks good no matter what she’s doing and watching her lying there with the blondish white mess on top of her head, I’m aching to reach out and smooth it back for her.
“Nana?” I say, my voice cracking. I reach out and place my hand gently on her leg over the thick white covers.
She stirs, her eyes swiveling over to meet mine, but I can see how hard it is for her to move her head accordingly. My stomach sinks as she tries to smile at me.
“Milly,” she whispers hoarsely. “Guess we don’t have to worry about the garage, huh?”
The breath catches in my chest as I force myself to chuckle for her benefit. “Says who?”
But her eyes flutter closed and for a brief terrifying moment I freak out on the inside. Is this it? Was she waiting for me to get here before she let go? My heart pounds with panic but then she opens them again, wincing. “Amanda, Kelly. Milly,” she says, slurring slowly, concentrating on every word. “I want to talk to you. Come over here, honey.”
Auntie Amanda leans down on the other side of her while I go to stand next to my mom, interlacing my fingers with my Nanas’.
Nana clears her throat. “There are some things I want to say to you.” She struggles to sit up until Mom helps her, fixing the pillow behind her. “Make the most of each day. They never last long enough to get everything done, but try your best to put as much happiness into each of them. Keep your thoughts positive. It helps when you believe you can achieve anything, it really does.” Her voice trails and she struggles to take some breaths.
“Mom, you don’t have to talk,” Auntie Amanda says, her voice shaking. “If it takes too much energy…”
But Nana just shakes her head slowly. What she has to say is obviously important enough to her to carry on even though it’s difficult. “But most importantly…” she sighs, her eyes unfocused. “The one regret I have in my life is letting love pass me by.” Her hand squeezes mine tighter. “I never told you because of your father. But before him, there was another. Jimmy…he was my first love. He was my whole world. He wanted me to marry him, but I was convinced, convinced that we were too young for that. I didn’t want to make a mistake. It was all he wanted…I was all he wanted. And I shut it out instead, thinking it was merciful rather than stringing him along.” There’s a longing in her voice, even as soft as it is. “It took a long time for me to realize that Jimmy had been the one and I’d let him go.”
I feel like I’m peeking into a conversation I shouldn’t be listening to, and Mom and Auntie Amanda seem as shocked as I am.
“What about Daddy? Didn’t you love him?” Auntie asks.
Nana barely nods. “Yes, most certainly. But in a different way. Your father was a wonderful man, a great father. He treated me well and provided for us, but he wasn’t my soul mate. that belonged to Jimmy and I never told him, even when your dad died.”
“What happened to him? To Jimmy?” I’m surprised when my own voice fills the silence in the room.
“Jimmy passed away last year. Cancer, from what I heard.”
My gaze drops to the bed where my Nana’s hooked up to all these beeping machines. The aching in my chest does nothing to actually help her, and instead only makes me feel worse. I can’t even imagine what it must be like, living your whole life with that kind of regret. “I’m sorry, Nana.”
“Don’t’ be sorry,” she wheezes. “Just hold on to love when it finds you, never mind what obstacles might be in the way. I know you’re young, and I want you to live your life to the fullest, but just remember what I said.” She leans back, clearly exhausted from using so much of her strength.
I squeeze her hand back, nodding as the door to the room cracks open, Rich returning quietly with coffee. Dane, Dylan, and Drew file into the room, their immense size taking up so much of the space by themselves. My eyes search theirs until I look back down at her.
“I will, Nana.”