I drop a gray shirt on top of the others laid out on the bed, frustrated at not having brought enough clothes. Not surprising really. I never thought I’d have anyone to impress.

I never thought the day would come when my modest clothes would not satisfy me, when I’d want to show more of myself. But even I have to admit that the workout clothes Bryant bought me had changed me in some way. They gave me the confidence in my appearance I had been trained to ignore.

I collapse onto my bed next to a pair of blue jeans, gazing through the window at the ocean. I want to tell myself there’s nothing going on between me and Bryant, that the invitation to dinner is innocent, a meal between friends. But earlier that day, he had hinted at something more happening between us. The invitation to his cabin is definitely a big step. There’s something about Bryant that refuses to let me go. I dream of him at night and daydream about him most of the day. The way he looks at me, the way he says my name, everything about him ignites an intense desire inside me I can no longer ignore.

Entering his private room would be crossing the line into a territory I’m not familiar with. It could be a mistake. I could be setting myself up for major heartbreak. But there’s no way I’m about to pass up this opportunity.

As much as I try, as much as I’m dying to, I can’t stay away. I’m also curious to find out how a normal employee is able to occupy the entire top deck. Especially when we had been instructed never to go up there.

There are only two explanations. He could be acquainted with one of the wealthy guests and they offered him their cabin for the evening. Or maybe, his job in admin affords him more privileges than ours. Either way, I’m intrigued enough to play along.

I reach for the jeans and a navy blue T-shirt that’s long enough to be a mini-dress. It doesn’t really matter what I’m wearing because the moment Bryant lays his eyes on me, no amount of clothing would be able to hide me from feeling exposed. One look from him and I’m stripped naked. His x-ray eyes see deeper than my skin. They reach into my soul and start rearranging things I had not wanted shifted, but come to find I like the new look after all. Being around someone who sees so much of me is both exciting and terrifying.

Fully dressed, I release my hair from its loose ponytail and run a brush through it. I can’t find it in me to put it back into its usual braid. They say, once you taste a slice of freedom, you never go back. I don’t know if I want to.

I’m about to step out the door when I remember the small tube of tinted lip-gloss and mascara Lynn had given me earlier, claiming I need to do more to bring my best features to the forefront. The only time I’ve ever worn makeup was on my wedding day, and that had been one clean sweep of mascara on each eye and clear gloss on my lips for shine.

As I run the gloss on my bottom lip, while gazing at my reflection in the mirror, I’m glad she had insisted I keep the makeup items. Now that I’ve discovered the transforming power of a makeover and change of clothes, I might even get myself a few more products once this trip is over.

I take one last look in the mirror. Now that I have to leave the room, to see him again, tiny drops of sweat are popping through the skin on my nose. Anxiety has replaced my earlier excitement, but it’s too late to back out now.

I’ll be fine. I’ll get through tonight. He did say a meal between friends is all it is.

I draw in a breath, hold, and count to twenty before releasing, watching my shoulders rise and fall. How is it possible that Bryant makes me feel both intimidated and comfortable at the same time?

I take a few steps toward the door and pause with a hand on the doorknob to lift my chin and push my shoulders back. I step through the door.

The moment I reach the staircase, I’m breathless again as nervous energy claws through me. I grip the metal railing and get moving upward, one step at a time.

My knees feel about to give in, but I’ve come too far to turn back now. And I don’t want to. This is my chance to grow, to become the woman I’ve always wanted to be, confident and sure of herself. The woman who goes for what she wants, no matter what anyone else or the voice inside her head is telling her. It’s time for me to break out of the mold and explore the world with all its thrills and dangers. Bryant is the key to the other side.

On the landing, I close my eyes for a moment and push the ball of fear through my dry throat.

Before heading to the hallways, I look around to make sure there’s nobody around to inform my boss that I’ve been spotted on the upper deck. I’ve never been one to bend the rules and I hope I won’t lose my job over this.

Working on a cruise ship brings me so much satisfaction that I see myself doing something like this for a longer period of time. Being on the water makes me feel alive in so many different ways.

The hallways are covered with thick carpeting and the walls are lined with what looks to be vintage artwork. As my feet sink into the carpet, I can’t help thinking this is wrong. Why would Bryant want me to come up here, putting both our jobs at risk? My sense of adventure is starting to wane as it dawns on me why the upper deck is off limits. This place is pure luxury. The expensive crystal chandeliers above my head say it all.

There are quite a few doors that I don’t know which one to pick. I’m so nervous sweat trickles down my spine. What does he expect me to do? How should I know which door is the right one? What if someone comes out and finds me here, looking lost?

If this is a game he’s playing, he has succeeded. I feel like a complete idiot.

Refusing to make a fool of myself, I turn to get back to the staircase when I hear his voice behind me. Relief washes through me as I turn to face him. He isn’t playing games, after all. And the way he looks takes my breath away. He has on the most amazing baby blue Cashmere sweater, worn over blue jeans. No shoes. Sexy.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he asks, standing in the doorway furthest from the stairs. The smirk on his face tells me he knows I was about to bolt.

“Hi.” My voice wavers. “I wasn’t sure which door is the right one. You never said, remember?”

“Now you know.” He pushes away from the door frame. “Come on in.”

I glance at the stairs and back at him. I start walking in his direction. It’s a wonder my shaky legs manage to get me to my destination.

When I get close enough to smell his cologne, he moves aside for me to step into the room. Room is the wrong word. This is a freaking suite, an apartment.

My mouth drops open at the sight of the luxury spread out before me. Everything is so beautiful, so expensive. Soft leather couches, chandeliers, a plasma TV that covers the entire wall, and a breathtaking view of the ocean. I swallow and turn to him.

“Are you sure we’re in the right room? Did you lie to me?” I frown at him. “Tell me you’re not a guest. If you are, why would you use the staff gym when the ones for the guests are so much better?”

He lays a hand on the small of my back and ushers me deeper into the room.

Goosebumps spread across my skin in response to his touch. He leads me to a pristine white couch I’m almost afraid to sit on. But I do after a moment’s hesitation. He sits down next to me and leans back. “This is the right place, yoga girl.” He slings his arm across the back of the couch, getting dangerously close to me. I can almost hear the electricity sparking between us.

“You’re right. I did lie. There’s something you don’t know about me.” He takes a breath. “I’m neither a guest nor a member of staff. Not really.”

I cock my head to the side, confused. “Well, what is it? Who are you?”

“Bryant LaClaire. This ship is mine.”

“No.” My eyes widen and my cheeks flush with heat. “You can’t be.”

His eyes glint with mischief. “I swear to you, this time I’m not playing games.”

I clutch my knees with my hands. “If what you’re saying is true, if you’re really Bryant LaClaire, that means you’re my employer.” Hot acid spreads through my stomach as I think of the times we spent together, searching for moments where I acted inappropriately. But why should I feel guilty? The way I look at it, I didn’t do anything wrong, did I? He was the one to speak to me first at the gym, the one who bought me clothes, and the one to invite me up to his place. If anyone acted inappropriately, it was him. But, then again, he’s also the boss.

Our eyes meet and disappointment expands in my belly.

He’s my boss, nothing can happen between us. I shouldn’t have come. Why didn’t I trust my instincts and stay away? The pain of losing him even before having the chance to get closer rips through me like an unforgiving tornado.

No matter which way I look at it, this isn’t a good idea. Despite being annoyed at being lied to, I wish he’d carried on the lie for a little longer. But of course things would’ve been much worse. It’s best this way.

I shift away from him, so he’s no longer close enough to touch. There’s only one way this relationship can go, nowhere.

I reluctantly pull my gaze from his and push myself up from the couch. “This is a mistake. I should go.”

“Don’t.” He rises and moves closer to me, so close his breath strokes my face.

“What are you doing?” My heart rises to my throat.

He places a hand on my cheek. It takes all my willpower not to lean against it, to close my eyes and give in to his touch. “When I invited you up here, I was afraid of this. I was afraid that once you found out the truth, you’d walk away. I’d like it if you could prove me wrong.” He drops his hand from my cheek and lays both on my shoulders. His eyes reaching deep into my soul. “I didn’t tell you, because I wanted you to like me for me. Believe me, there’s more to me than my name.”

“You should still have told me.” My heart clenches. “Now I feel like a complete idiot.”

“Don’t you dare feel that way.” He tightens his grip on my shoulders. “You’re far from an idiot. You’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.”

My chin hits my chest as I hide the smile. “Don’t be silly.” No man has ever said those words to me before, not even Dustin.

“I may have lied to you about my identity, or at least withheld the information, but I’m not lying about this.” He places a finger under my chin and forces me to look back into his eyes. “How do you not see how stunning you are?”

I don’t respond but I also don’t move away from his touch. “What do you want?”

“I don’t want you to go,” he whispers, removing his hands from me, leaving me with an emptiness I haven’t felt before. “Have dinner with me. I hate eating alone.”

“Are you sure that’s all it is, dinner?” I can’t help grinning up at him.

He smiles back. “I might have an ulterior motive, but I don’t want to scare you away just yet.”

“Careful. You’re still my boss.”

“That’s right. Now say yes, or I might be forced to fire you.” He reaches for my hand. “Let’s eat, shall we?”

* * *

He lied again. If this were only dinner between friends, there wouldn’t be as many candles and flowers on the dining table, that’s set out on the balcony. And he certainly wouldn’t be looking at me the way he is right now, undressing me with his eyes.

Dustin had looked at me several times over the past year, but I never felt as if he was seeing me. Not for the first time, I regret marrying him. What had I been thinking, marrying someone who didn’t make me feel the way Bryant makes me feel? So this is why some women risk their hearts even for one night of passion? I get it now.

“Is the food to your satisfaction?” He brings his glass of water to his lips. “Or would you rather go eat in the canteen?”

I glance at the delicious pecan chicken. “No, sir. This is perfectly all right.”

“I admire your politeness, yoga girl.”

When is he going to stop calling me that? It’s so inaccurate. I suck at yoga and he knows it. But on the other hand, it makes me feel special that he has found a nickname for me.

We eat in silence for a few moments, watching the inky sea below.

I lift the last piece of chicken to my lips, and close my eyes to better enjoy the burst of flavors flirting with my taste buds. Compliments to the chef, for sure. The canteen food has nothing on this.

“Wow . . .” I lower my fork to my empty plate. “I don’t think I’ve ever eaten anything more delicious. Whoever prepared this meal is a keeper.”

He dabs his lips with an embroidered napkin. “I like to think I am.” That irresistible grin again, those dimples.

“No.” I shake my head. “You didn’t.”

“I did. I’d cook more if I had the time. It’s a hobby of mine.”

I glance at my plate in amazement. “Wow, I’m impressed.”

“That was the plan.” He reaches across the table and tucks a strand of hair—the night sea breeze had blown it into my eyes—back behind my ear.

I swallow hard but I don’t move away. “I like a man who can cook.” My eyes widen. I had not planned on saying those words out loud. How could my mouth betray me like that? My face grows hot as he watches me with an intensity which makes me want to run and stay at the same time. Since when do I play the flirting game? I have to remember that Bryant is not just any man. He’s the man that pays my wages. How long do I intend on sitting here, pretending this is all right?

“Oh yeah?” There’s a sexy lilt to his voice. “I have more skills where that came from. But if you want me to show you the rest, you’d better ask nicely.”

Sudden and immediate lust makes me dizzy.

I’m pretty sure he’s referring to his skills in bed. Sleeping with him or any man would be so scary after my last experience, so wrong because he’s my boss, but why does my body crave him so much?

“Are you done?” He gestures toward my plate.

I lay a hand on my stomach and nod. “Yes, thanks again.”

“Great, why don’t we go for a quick walk?”

I look at him in horror. “I can’t. I can’t be seen with you.”

He dips his head to the side. “You are aware that this balcony is big enough for a walk, right? We don’t need to leave this place.”

I marvel at how large the balcony is, so much bigger than most people’s bedrooms. “In that case, sure.”

No. I should go. I’m getting dangerously close to crossing the line. But he’s not asking me to follow him to his bedroom, just a quick walk together. What’s the harm in that? And besides, it would be nice to stretch my legs after sitting rigid for so long.

We don’t get far. After only a few step he gestures to a bench decorated in fairy lights.

“Let’s sit.” Instead of waiting for my response, he lowers himself onto the bench and I follow suit. Side-by-side, we watch the water sparkling in the night. No place has ever been more romantic than this. And my heart has never felt lighter. I want to be here for more than a few seconds, more than a few minutes, or even hours. I long to be here for as long as he wants me beside him, embracing the warmth of his body.

He twists to face me, his expression suddenly serious. “I’d like to be honest with you because I’m not the kind of guy who beats around the bush.” He waits until I turn to look at him. “I’m extremely attracted to you. So much that it blows my mind. And if my instincts are correct, you feel the same way about me.”

I clasp my hands tight in my lap. “I . . .”

“Denying it won’t do either of us any good. I know you left behind a complicated relationship. Whoever you were involved with broke something inside you.” He pauses. “But that doesn’t scare me. If anything, I want you even more. I want to spend time with you, to explore the body you keep hidden under those massive T-shirts you like to wear. Maybe I can heal you in my own special way.” He touches my cheek, sending my senses spinning out of control, making my head swim. “I’m not asking for more than you can give, just a little sexual fun between two people who are attracted to each other. No strings attached.”

He must be out of his mind. How the hell does one do that? How am I supposed to have no-strings-attached sex with a man who drives me so crazy with longing? On the other hand, how could I say no to the offer he is making me? What if this man can boost my sexual self-esteem and teach me things Dustin was unable to? It feels damn good to be wanted, to be desired even for a short time. But what if I fail miserably and he ends up as disappointed as Dustin had been? I don’t know how I would be able to recover from that.

“You think this is a good idea? I mean, you’re right, I do feel something for you. But—”

“Don’t make things more complicated than they need to be. Have you ever done something just because?”

I swallow hard and shake my head. I’ve always done what I was told was the right thing. And some of it turned out to be the wrong thing.

“That’s what I thought.” He grins at me. “Look, it doesn’t have to be tonight. I want you to think about it. Think of all the fun we’ll have.” He pauses and returns his attention to the water. “One of these days, I’ll be dropping by for a massage, anyway. I’ve heard you’re talented at it. You can give me my answer then.”

I nod slowly, lost for words. I’m pretty sure after this conversation, I’ll think of nothing else. My mind is already going wild thinking about the pros and cons of his proposal. I’ve followed rules all my life, now may be the time to bend some of them and act out of character. If I choose to have sex with him, I might regret it.

If I don’t, I might regret it all the same.