Chapter Eighty-Six
Bree
After everything we went through, I knew I shouldn’t fear a long walk. I shouldn’t even be worried about spending the night out in the desert. Nathan had always come through before, and this was no time for me to lose faith.
Waves of exhaustion flowed over me, but I kept walking. The desert was rough and rocky, and it took all my concentration not to twist an ankle. I told myself all I had to do was put one foot in front of the other and everything would be okay.
Nathan marched along as if we were strolling through a park.
I clenched my fists and struggled to keep up.
He glanced back now and then, but mostly he led the way without a second look. I stumbled along behind him and swore to myself that I wouldn’t say a thing.
Then the sun started to set, and I felt the first acidic bubbles of my anxiety return full force. We were stranded in the desert and darkness was closing in. Not only that, but we had no idea which way our enemies would come. The only certainty was that the cartel was searching for us and wouldn’t stop until they saw our dead bodies.
The morbid thought filled my head, and I tripped over a knotted root. I stumbled hard and hit my shin against a sharp rock.
Nathan turned around at my cry, but didn’t rush to my side. “Are you okay?”
“As if you care,” I muttered.
“What?” Nathan glared at me in the encroaching darkness.
I dragged myself to my feet only to find my knees were weak. I swayed and reached out to steady myself. Nathan was there with one strong arm stretched out. I batted him away and stumbled along to find my balance alone.
“You know there’s a difference between strength and stubbornness,” Nathan said.
“Really? And I’m supposed to believe you, of all people, can tell them apart?” I asked.
Nathan’s eyes glittered, lit from the side by the blazing sunset. “You don’t think you’re acting stubborn? If you need help, why don’t you just ask? Otherwise, you’re just slowing us down.”
“So now I’m just slowing you down?” My voice echoed off the jagged rocks ahead.
Nathan ran both hands through his hair and then clenched his fingers into fists. “Are you okay? Do you need me to walk with you?”
“I’m fine,” I snapped. “A Mexican cartel is trying to kill me, and I’m lost in the desert but I’m fine.”
“You forgot to mention that it’s getting dark,” Nathan said. He whipped around and started walking again.
“What does that matter? It’s not like I get to choose the direction were going,” I said.
Nathan stopped. “Where do you suggest we go?” he asked, not bothering to turn around.
I marched past him. “Right. It’s totally unreasonable for me to think about going somewhere besides Ciudad Juarez. Why not go straight back to where the cartel got ahold of us in the first place?”
Nathan grabbed my elbow and spun me to face him. “What is wrong with you? We have no choice but to go back the way we came. The nearest sections of the border will be covered by now. The cartel doesn’t think we can make it, but I do.”
I wrenched my arm from his grip. “You mean you’ll make it. Or you would if I wasn’t slowing you down.”
Nathan raised his hands up to the darkening sky and opened his mouth. I expected a primordial roar to come from him, but he held back. Instead, Nathan took another deep breath and turned to continue marching across the rough terrain.
Something inside me broke. I took one step, and my knees buckled. I slumped to the ground and cried out when my hip hit a sharp rock.
At first, Nathan didn’t turn around. I didn’t know how far he went before he noticed I wasn’t moving. My eyes felt too heavy to pry off the ground. I stared at a minuscule row of ants and wished I could move with such purpose.
“Bree?”
Nathan marched back and prodded me with the toe of his boot. My hands wouldn’t lift to push him away. I just sat, slumped on the ground and watched the ants marching away.
“Are you hurt?” Nathan squatted down and grabbed my chin.
I fought as he raised my face to his. “I’m not hurt. I just need to rest.”
“Are you cold?” he asked.
I glared up at him. “We’re in the desert.”
Nathan cocked an eyebrow. “So, what’s your problem?”
I choked on his ridiculous question. Tears sprang to my eyes, and I couldn’t answer over the sudden flood. The way Nathan squatted there and stared at me like I was a child didn’t help. I sobbed and slumped further down to the ground.
“Bree, we have to keep going. Even if you’re hungry or tired. The only way to solve those problems is to get to the next town,” Nathan said.
He tried to brush my hair back from my face but I slapped his hand away. “I’m hungry, I’m tired, and I’m going to die in the desert. But what does that matter? Everyone I ever loved already thinks I’m dead.”
Nathan sat down and gathered me into his arms. I fought his comfort but I was too weak and he wasn’t letting go. He reached up with one wide hand and pressed my head to his shoulder.
I leaned there sobbing and gritting my teeth in anger. My emotions crashed all over the place until, finally, they started to ebb. My head fell heavier on his shoulder, and he started to rub my back.
“We’ll make it out of this, Bree, I swear,” Nathan said.
“How are you so sure?” I asked.
The sun dropped below the horizon and left us with a fading orange light. Nathan let the last rays of warmth linger on his face before he looked down and kissed me.
“The only reason I’m sure is because you are still with me,” he said.
Without another word, Nathan stood up and held out his hand. I let Nathan pull me to my feet. Then we walked on into the darkness together.