I sit in my seat as the plane lands, trying to shake the crazy haziness that fills my head. Two hours ago, I was struggling to not come the second Logan’s warm hand touched my bare chest. Trying not to come when that hand slithered its way down my torso, past my stomach, and wrapped around my hard-on was the single hardest things I’ve ever had to do.
Never in a million years did I even think something like that would happen. It’s like Logan’s entire attitude changed over one single fucking lead being discovered. His flip-flop moods make me feel like I’m on a rollercoaster yet the second he commands me to jump, I ask how high like a junkie needing that last hit.
I keep telling myself that it’s the last time, that I really don’t need whatever ounce he gives me. But then he does something like crawl into bed with me, wrapped his comforting arms around me, giving me the most intense, penetrating stare as I got us off that I felt his pull fill me until I came so fucking hard; it’s times like that when I feel like Logan might break from the damaging, downward cycle he’s been in.
Almost.
Because I had to ask him to join me. I had to hold his hand. And I saw the familiar shadow settle in his eyes ours locked on to one another.
I know he’s struggling, but I see him trying, too. That, and the knowledge that I’ll actually remember this encounter are what’s getting me through. I’ll do what I can to help him but he has to make the next move.
“Here.” Logan hands me a water and sits down next to me on the bench seat. I take the bottle from his hand but I can’t stop staring at him as he drinks his down. The only thing between me and Logan DeLuca is one flimsy retractable armrest. His eyes lock onto mine and his cheek lifts in a cocky smirk. “What?”
“Nothing.” I shake my head. I stare at the bottle in front of me, every thought in my head zoning in on Logan. Always Logan. Every wild thought, every crazy one. The nightmares and fantasies I’ve ever had and the horrifying realities we’ve shared.
My obsession.
“Hey, look at me.” The minute I turn, he leans over and gives me a chaste kiss on my cheek. “Stop overthinking.”
“Can you really blame me? I mean, the last time we were in this position, we both said some pretty fucked up things and then we fought. I don’t want that to happen again.”
“Cameron, I was a drunken idiot. This is still a little difficult for me, and I stand by what I said: I don’t want to start anything big, at least not right now.” Logan hesitates for a moment. I can tell there’s more that he wants to say but he’s holding back on me.
“But?” I urge him to continue.
Logan expels a sigh. “But, I know that when this is over and we’ve finally come to terms with everything? I know that I want to…try.”
There’s so much sincerity in that last word that it takes all I have not to unbuckle my seatbelt and pounce on him. All my restraint is being tested and somehow, I give him a cool answer as we near the runway.
“Okay.” I give him a tight smile, saying nothing else. I quickly open the water and take a big gulp while the man next to me eyes me apprehensively. But no more words are spoken.
Keep yourself busy, Cameron. Don’t fuck this up.
Somehow, I manage to keep my composure neutral while inside I’m dancing, singing, and leading a marching band down a street in celebration. I’ve waited, in a sick way, to hear these words, in some form or another, come from Logan, for years. I can almost see us old and gray, sitting on the front porch in our rocking chairs, spending weekends with grandchildren, happy.
It’s a smooth, quiet landing once we make our descent but of course, it doesn’t last long. The doors open and the staircase is rolled over to us. We finally reach the tarmac when we hear the recognizable voice.
“Gentleman, welcome to Denver. We’ve been waiting for you. Glad to have you show up…unexpectedly.” We turn to the pissed off older man standing near the stairs.
“Wilkerson, can’t say we feel the same,” I grumble in annoyance of our plan already being screwed up.
“How the hell do you even know we’re here?” Logan asks, but I have a feeling the answer lies in our rainbow-haired ally.
“Mr. Rodriguez. And speaking of, the second we reach my car, you’re on the phone with him.” He turns and walks to the dark car waiting for him. I start walking toward the car but Logan grabs my arm and holds me back.
“We don’t have to go, Cam.” He shakes his head to make his point. “Remember, this is our mission. We answer to no one, report to no one.”
“And screwing over the FBI is the answer?”
“Look, we play it his way, answer a few questions, gather some intel, and early tomorrow morning, we go where our gut tells us. Even if we have to bribe someone for the Alexander Group’s schedule, we’re not staying here for more than twelve hours.”
“Fine, but if we get shit for this, I’m blaming you,” I crack a smile and grab my bags to take to the awaiting car.
I can’t help it. It just teases me, all perfect, round, and strong. When Cam bends over, I can’t help but slap his ass before ducking out of the way when he yelps. Something about the plane ride changed everything. Two and a half hours of air time, over an hour spent in bed forgetting all the bullshit going on around us, and my whole attitude about this mission changed.
Yes, we’re doing this for Brad and Josh.
Yes, this is for Suzie.
But this is also for us. This is for my happiness, Cameron’s happiness, and I’m sick and tired of feeling lonely. It might be too soon, it might be wrong, but I want to feel like I belong to someone again.
“I’m gonna get you for that, DeLuca. Watch your ass,” he calls behind me.
I turn around, the grin on my face wide. “I’d rather watch yours.”
He rolls his eyes but as I get into the car, I can see a ghost of a smile play at his lips.
* * *
“You brought us here?” I look around at the rubble around us as my heart starts to thump in my chest. My hands clench and unclench as I try to steady my racing heart.
“We figured if you’re going to be here, we’re putting you to work. A few things, though.” He hands us both a folder. “First, this is everything new that we’ve learned today. We got a call from Mr. Rodriguez with new information regarding The Judge. They believe that he’s a member of Ms. Alexanders team. There’s a summary of the phone call your business partner had with her including her updated work schedule for the following three months as well as her scheduled flights for the last six months. Pay attention to the highlighted ones.
“Second, we’ve got a third team headed to Atlanta as we speak. A few of my guys will be going undercover with Ms. Alexander’s security team and they’ll be rendezvousing with them in Atlanta in the morning. They’ll be assisting us from here on out. Third,” he hands me a phone and I look down to see the familiar name. “Speak, Mr. DeLuca.”
I glare at Wilkerson as he exits the car while I bring the phone to my ear. “Jo.”
“You assholes better have a fucking good explanation as to why I have two rogue partners and why you had to bring Suzie and Grayson into it.”
“Fuck you, JoJo. We don’t work for you; we work with you. It’s not like we didn’t have a plan.” I lower my voice. “You know Cam and I will work ten times better if we go out on our own and follow up with whatever we find. That means we catch this asshole faster. That means we get the man who murdered Brad and Josh.”
I swallow the lump in my throat. That’s the first time I’ve used that word out loud regarding Brad and feel a little queasy.
“And you think I haven’t thought about this at least a half a dozen times? Logan, there’s nothing more than I want than to catch him. And if you’d have told me your plans before, then you’d know that I’m one hundred percent behind this. I just thought you had a little more respect for me than this.”
“What?” I jerk my head up and look at Cam. I hold up a finger when he gives me a questioning look. I still don’t think I heard Jo right.
“Find a way to get away from Wilkerson and you get to Atlanta as fast as you can. That’s the next stop. Irina has a job there in three days and they’ll be flying out tomorrow afternoon. Just turn your fucking phone on and call me once in a while.”
“Um, we sorta smashed them on the plane in an act of rebellion which I now realize was a stupid idea, but we’ll stop by Walmart and pick up a couple of burner phones.”
“Get me those numbers as soon as possible, Logan.”
“We will. And Jo? We’re sorry. But when Suz and I were talking earlier and she told me about what happened to her, I just snapped.”
“I know,” Jo mumbles quietly. “I’m at her place almost every night. I stay until she falls asleep and I can’t make myself leave.”
“Take care of my sister while we’re gone. She’s all we’ve got left of him.”
“Go get him, Logan.”
I hang up the phone and I breathe a little easier until I look at Cam.
“I think Suz and JoJo are together.”
He looks at me suspiciously.
“And JoJo gives us his blessing. Wants us to head out to Atlanta as soon as possible. With Irina’s travel schedule, we now know where she’s going to be for the next two months. We just have to find a way back to the airport with our stuff.”
Cam gives me a wink – a fucking wink that makes my heart beat fast for another reason – and with a smirk, taps the glass partition that separates us from the driver.
“We’ve been ordered back to the airport, buddy. Step on it.”
I shake my head and stifle a laugh as we speed off toward the airport.