To describe the excitement level Jessica’s parents felt regarding our relationship could easily be done with one word.

Nonexistent.

They had no idea of Jessica’s past experiences with her ex. The countless times she’d filed protection orders. The domestic violence reports. The stabbings. The death threats. The visits from Wichita Police to stop him from beating her. The file listing his trips to jail was several inches thick. Her parents knew nothing of any of it.

As with most abuse victims, she was embarrassed and blamed herself. She feared telling them the truth, so she told them nothing.

It seemed they knew everything of me, however.

“He writes pornography,” her mother said. “His books depict relationships with unwed couples having sex.”

“They’re books, mother,” Jessica said. “Just books. He treats me with respect. He’s good with the children.”

“We don’t like the idea of you being with someone like that,” her mother replied. “He’s got tattoos.”

Clinging to their belief that she would one day have a spiritual awakening and break off the relationship with me, they’d never taken the time to meet me. After our physical relationship began, their contact with Jessica diminished to a once a month phone call, at best.

Each of their attempts to contact her were met by Jessica’s praise of how the children’s attitudes and manners had improved. She explained how she felt loved, respected, and safe. She also reiterated during each call that our relationship sat firmly on a solid foundation of respect and love.

Eventually, they felt the need to drive to Wichita and point out my deficiencies in person. I wasn’t thrilled about being criticized from afar – or in person – by anyone who spewed the Bible’s scripture as if they’d written it themselves.

Hoping that they’d somehow find a way to accept me for who I was and not what I appeared to be, I agreed to the meeting. The next weekend, Jessica’s mother, father, younger brother, and one of her younger sisters arrived in Wichita.

We met for an early evening dinner at The Anchor, a local bar-restaurant that was situated within a few blocks of where we lived. It was typically filled with hipsters, artists, and musicians who enjoyed the eclectic fare offered on the often-changing menu.

Jess, the children, and I walked from the adjoining parking lot to the lot her father had parked in. Jess looked like she was ready for a fashion show, as usual. The children were wearing their typical late-summer attire; Landon wore shorts and a tee shirt. Lily, a dress.

I wore a V-neck tee, jeans, and the Chuck’s used for what had become Jessica’s favorite sexual position. Upon exiting the car, her father looked me up and down, pausing for an inordinate amount of time to take in my full sleeve of tattoos.

An aeronautical engineer and former Air Force pilot, he now worked for Boeing as a Program Manager on the F-16 Program. His military career as an officer didn’t include obtaining the tattoos often sought by Marines or Army infantrymen.

Although he may not have realized it – or believed it – my choice to use my body as a canvas didn’t make me any lesser of a man. I had no intention to prove my worth to him. I would simply be myself. He could then base his opinion of me on fact, not fabrication.

I extended my hand. “Pleasure to finally meet you, Sir.”

With a smile and a nod, he accepted my hand, gripping it firmly in his. “Terry.”

“It’s a pleasure, Terry.”

I faced her mother. She looked at me and gasped. It wasn’t intentional, it was more of a reaction to what she’d seen. She was appalled at my appearance. There was nothing she could do to hide it.

With bulging eyes and shaking hands, she stared at me.

Feeling that a handshake would exceed the extent of her desire to touch me, I chose to not to shake her hand.

Instead, I opened my arms. “Come here, Lisa,” I said with a smile. “It’s Lisa, right?”

Hoping to be saved from the situation, she glanced at Jess. Well aware that there was nothing she could do to prevent me from proceeding with the awkward embrace, Jess simply shrugged.

Lisa’s face distorted into a fearful scowl.

It was all the invitation I needed. I took a step in her direction, wrapped my arms around her, and pulled her close.

“So nice to finally meet you,” I said.

“Nice to uhhm…nice to meet, you, too,” she stammered.

I held her for just long enough to make her mildly uncomfortable. Then, as a group, we went in the restaurant. Surrounded by tattooed hipsters and artists adorned with no less than a dozen facial piercings, I felt right at home.

We ate dinner together, talking about everything from airplanes to AC-DC. After the table was cleared, the waitress brought the bill.

“How do you want this split?” she asked.

I handed her my bank card. “All on one.”

Her father shook his head. “We can split it up. I’ll gladly pay for--”

“You’re our guest for the weekend. Let me treat you as such,” I said.

He alternated glances between Jessica and me, then grinned. “Thank you.”

The next day they came to the loft. While Lisa seemed appalled by the living space, Terry was nothing short of fascinated.

“It reminds me of the flats in Europe,” he said. “Only much bigger.”

“For now,” I said. “It suits us just fine.”

Lisa wrinkled her nose, surveyed the space, and picked apart every facet of the arrangement.

When the weekend ended, Terry offered a smile and a congratulatory remark. Lisa, on the other hand, offered nothing but a scowl followed by a side-eyed stare as they walked to their car.

I looked at Jess as they drove away. “Much better than I expected.”

“Me, too.” She waved at her sister and then offered a consoling look. “My mother will take time.”

“She’ll eventually accept me,” I assured her. “She doesn’t have a choice.”

“What do you mean?”

“Any time she sees you, she’ll see me. Eventually, she’ll accept me. It might take time, but it will happen.”

“When I go there to visit, you’re going to come with me?” she asked excitedly.

“Of course,” I said. “We’re a family.”

At that moment, the splinters of amber that were sprinkled throughout her brown iris glistened with a brightness I’d yearned to see for months.

And the depth of her beautiful eyes returned.