Nathan bounced on Hayden’s lap. The two year old wrestled away from his grasp. I jerked back as Nathan started to scream.

“Shh. You’re okay,” Hayden whispered.

Leo chuckled when Nathan stopped crying. “Faker.” There was a playful look in their baby’s eyes. Sometimes raising a child seemed hard, but there were so many moments that made me yearn for it. I was lost with baby fever, but I was a little too late. That train had come and went.

“You guys are great parents,” I said. “Makes me a little jealous.”

Hayden furrowed his brow into the air. Dark bags of exhaustion were resting under his eyes. “I haven’t slept in two days,” he grunted.

“Yeah, but you’re still smiling,” I said. “That’s what I never understood. Parents can go through the hell and still come out smiling. How is that possible?”

“We’re like soldiers. It’s just a duty you give yourself to,” Hayden said.

Leo chuckled and sat back. “He’s lying. He loves every second of this. Then again, I do too.”

“Well, you’re both masochists, so there’s that,” I said.

Nathan laughed at my joke, but the two adults in the room looked zonked. Hayden bent over and whispered to Nathan, “Leo went out drinking last night.”

“Drinking? You?” I asked him.

Leo shrugged and looked the other way. “Nah. Not really.”

There was too much on my mind to wonder what Leo was up to. When my phone vibrated for the tenth time this afternoon, I felt my stomach sink.

“You already know what it’s going to say,” Leo muttered.

He was right. The banks’ incessant calls were starting to stack up on me. I was going to have to figure something out sooner or later. “The L&S was my pride and fucking joy,” I said.

Leo nodded, but I knew his heart wasn’t in it anymore. “You don’t care?” I asked.

Hayden’s hand fell against Leo’s thigh. I knew that move. He was calming the beast down. “I just don’t want to live in the past,” he said.

“We made it together. We hired the contractors, we talked to state legislators, and we fought tooth and nail to keep it going,” I said. “Remember how strict the anti-sex laws were? It was us that changed everything. Us.”

“And we lost… to the banks of all people,” Leo interrupted.

I sat back in my chair, lost in thought. Maybe we he was right, but another part of me wondered if his scope was too narrow. There would be other fights, and culture could only continue to move forward.

After some time passed, I leaned forward and looked him in the eyes. “We didn’t lose anything.”

“Whatever. I’m tired of hearing about it,” Leo said.

Backing off, I shut my mouth. Beneath his tough exterior, he was a lot more emotional than he wanted to people to know. Leather and Lace was his club too, after all, and even though he acted like he didn’t care, he surely did.

“Anyway, you’re right. It’s not a big deal,” I said.

Hayden held Nathan close to his chest. Their baby managed to close his eyes for a brief moment, but there was no telling when he’d wake up crying.

“I can’t believe it’s over,” Hayden said. “I wish I got to see the club in its true form. You know, back in the day.”

I laughed. “It was in worse condition back then if you can believe it,” I said. “You went at the best time.”

“It used to have more soul. It just felt different,” Leo said.

The flood of support from friends was heartwarming, but the emails and Facebook messages came from people who had left the scene long ago. Old friends turned into distant acquaintances. Our lives had changed in a way we never could anticipate. Some went on to do some great things. Others didn’t get that chance.

I had something else on my mind. Well, two things were on my mind, actually. In my pocket, I twirled Noah’s business card, scraping the sharp edges across my skin.

Nathan finally woke up, screaming and clawing for his daddy. “Okay! It’s time to go,” Hayden groaned.

“Nap time?” Leo asked.

Hayden didn’t laugh. It was a cruel joke. “There will be no nap time,” he said, robotically.

“Hey, before you go, I wanted to give you something,” I said.

I ran into my room and grabbed the two heavy black bags. Embroidered on the front were the initials L&S. “Whoa. You made these?” Leo asked.

“Yeah, just for you guys. It’s nothing big,” I said.

Leo hugged me, followed by Hayden. I gave a loving kiss to their baby. “We love you, man,” Leo said.

“I love you too,” I said.

Taking out Noah’s business card, I flung it against the counter. Was I really going to call him? Fuck yeah, I was. He was hot as hell, and I needed an excuse to have a good time.

Noah’s freckles were so unique, the way they sat scattered underneath his cheekbones. As soon as I saw him, I wanted kiss them one by one. I never felt that way for anyone, so I took it as a sign. Calling him was a must.

Strangely, I lost all of my confidence as soon as I picked up my phone. Even my throat felt tight. “What is going on?”

How many years had it been since I had gone on a date with someone? Let’s see… it had been too long to count.

Laughing at my odd behavior, I dialed his number and anxiously waited for him to answer. “It’s you, isn’t it?” His voice was neither rough nor high-pitched and sweet. Slightly playful and downright deviant, his voice was unique and inviting.

I instantly felt comforted by it. Strange.

“How’d you know?” I asked him.

“I don’t get too many calls,” Noah said.

My body started to relax almost immediately. Sitting back down, I poured a stiff drink. “Are you busy tonight?” I asked.

“Tonight? Let me check my planner,” he said.

“Okay,” I muttered, nearly laughing out loud. Planner? Who had planners these days?

“Hank, I’m just fucking with you. I’m flying in from New York right now,” he said.

“Wait, seriously? You’re on a plane right now?” I asked.

There was a short pause before his uninhibited voice echoed into the phone, briefly lagging before cutting back in again. “It’s the modern world. Did you know you can get in-flight Wi-Fi too?”

It wasn’t funny. “Duh. I know that.” I didn’t. I didn’t get out too much. It must have been over a decade since I had flown anywhere.

“I’ll be in town in twenty minutes, but I’ll need to get ready,” Noah said.

The young alpha with green eyes paused for me to answer. “That sounds perf,” I said. Perf? Oh, god. Why was I so good at embarrassing myself?

“Perfect,” I correct myself.

“Uh, yeah. Perf. I’ll call you when I’m ready. It’ll be fun,” he said.

“It will. Thank you. Er, I mean, have a good flight… fuck.”

I hung up the phone as fast as I could. I had to be careful with my words, or I’d scare off every man I’d meet.

When Noah finally did text me back, I jumped up and quickly grabbed my phone.

“Meet me at Bar Silencio. You know where that’s at?”

“I know the spot.”

“Good. See you in thirty minutes. And bring Adam’s trench coat.”

My heart pumped rapidly as my eyes fell on the black coat. Noah knew that I took it, but how?

“His trenchcoat?”

“Just bring it.”

“Sure thing,” I said.

Grabbing the coat in a hurry, I left the house to drive to the Bar Silencio, a small dive bar in the heart of the city. On this Friday night, the streets were buzzing with people dressed in costumes.

Shit, I thought. I had completely forgot about Halloween. Was it already October? Somehow, I had lost track of time.

“Hey, you! Over here!” Noah’s freckled face smiled in a lit up corner of the parking lot. He was nonchalantly leaning against the galaxy-blue brick wall of the bar.

A group of men walked by the club, sneering at me with masks hanging off their faces. Angels and devils flew around us, lining up to get into the bar.

“You forgot your costume,” I said.

Noah laughed and grabbed the bottom of my shirt. He brought me closer to him and grinned, close enough to make me want him. He was aggressive, but I liked that in a man. “I’d rather play dress up at home,” he said. “Know what I mean?”

Our lips nearly brushed against each other, and his eyes were half closed, waiting for me to react. A satisfied smile formed on my face, but it was quickly ruined when a group of guys bumped into us, nearly slamming our bodies against the brick wall.

“Sorry, bud.”

“No worries,” I said.

Noah quickly licked his lips, but he slowly dragged his teeth against the edges. There it was again, a look of defiance that seemed so inherently him. Now, I was the one latching onto him, already falling into that catch of desire. Together, we walked inside the bar.

The pounding music reverberated throughout the room, hitting the center of our bodies. The sound waves shook us closer, reminding us that we were alive and we were free. I couldn’t remember how long it had been since I had gone out dancing. Excited, I pulled Noah into the crowd.

“I’ve never seen it so packed here!” Noah yelled over the music. I wanted to nod my head in agreement, but a dull smile hung on my face. I hadn’t come here in over a decade.

“Should we get a drink?” I asked.

Hank leaned in and kissed my cheek. “Let’s enjoy this for a while,” he said.

As I was sucked into the pulsing bodies, my body turned hot. Fuck, I wanted him so bad. The thick fog and raging lights blinded me. Like a body sucked into a rip current, I fell into the music.

This, I thought, is what I should have done with the Leather and Lace. A full remodel with a dance floor would have been the update that could have brought new people out. Hindsight was always twenty-twenty, and Noah’s daring eyes as he twisted his feet to the music snapped me out of the thought.

He was hot. There was no doubt in my mind about that. His leather jacket hung loosely around his shoulder, and his black t-shirt was tucked in neatly to his slacks. Old school sensibilities were a strong turn on for me, and there was that classic daring look to Noah.

“Feel me,” he said, barely audible against the heavy, driving beat. “C’mon. Get closer. I don’t bite.”

“Maybe I want you to.”

Pulling him closer, I felt my cock throb against my jeans. Noah’s tight chest pushing against mine felt incredible. I latched onto the loose fabric of his slacks and held on tight. The feeling of electricity rushed through my heart. This was going to be a wild night.

For us, time seemed to slow down. The music suddenly didn’t seem as loud, and the ambiance darkened. For a second, it felt like it was just the two of us in the middle of that giant dance floor. A light draped onto our heads, and Noah went for the kiss I had been craving all night.

It was a rushed kiss, one that was cut short by the costumed football players from outside. They bumped into my elbow, and of course, my forehead knocked against Noah’s elegant nose.

I heard the crunch of his cartilage.

“Shit!” Curses of pain left Noah’s mouth, but my embarrassment was far worse than any physical pain. Noah filtered away from the crowd until he reached the entrance to the bathroom. Running after him, I stopped and ran my hand across his back. “Are you okay?”

A small trickle of blood could be seen trailing down the side of his index finger as he held his nose shut.

I was mortified.

“Sure. I’m hunky fucking dory,” he said, sighing with pain.

“Oh, fuck. I’m so sorry, Noah. I didn’t mean to hit you,” I said.

“Is it bad?” Noah leaned his head back. I winced when I saw more blood.

“No,” I lied. “It just needs a little tending to.”

Noah could see the expression on my face. Once he stumbled into the bathroom, he could see the mark clearly. His nose was beginning to swell up like a balloon.

Grabbing some tissue from the dispenser, I tried my best to clean it. “Here. Tilt your head back,” I said, moving closer to him. I caressed the back of his head and acted like I knew what I was doing.

“Pretty hot, right? Ugh, I look horrible,” Noah whispered, nose clogged.

I did my best to offer him some simple words of encouragement. “Hey, you can just tell people this is your Halloween costume!” When he didn’t laugh, I felt eager to please him.

“Does it hurt?”

“No, not really. I’m just pissed we couldn’t finish that kiss,” he said.

Swallowing hard, Noah saw the nervousness form in my eyes. He removed my hand from the back of his head. The wound had finally closed. Strangely, he didn’t let go of my hand. He pulled me deeper into the crowded bathroom. His back hit the stall, and the door opened.

As I leaned forward for a kiss, Noah placed his hand across my cheek. “You’re really fucking hot,” he whispered. The sharpest grin formed on his face as clean as a dagger through the heart.

“Likewise,” I moaned.

“So, what should we do with all of this hotness?” His fingers clasped around the edges of my shirt. Knowing what to do, he ran his hands underneath the fabric, nails scratching against my chest.

My breath felt shallow, but my heart never stopped pounding against my sternum. How was this going to go down? Or was I the one who was supposed to go down? I was supposed to be the leading expert on BDSM culture, but I hadn’t hooked up with anyone in a long time.

“Don’t look so stressed out,” he said. “This is just for fun.”

Just fucking kiss me, I thought.

Noah read my mind like an open book. The desire was written all over my face. I kissed him, but Noah quickly pulled away. Moaning, his teeth clenched against my lips. “Kinky,” I whispered.

“I can get kinkier.” Suddenly, my pants felt a whole lot tighter. Every nerve in my body twisted as he forced me against the wall of the bathroom stall.

“What are you into, Hank?”

When Noah’s handsome mouth came back to mine, I savored his taste. He smelled like vanilla, but he was anything but. “I like this,” I said.

“Come on. Tell me. I won’t tell a soul,” he said.

Swallowing, I looked down at the floor. My kink wasn’t exactly out in the open. It was something personal to me, something I didn’t feel comfortable revealing to him so soon.

My palms slid underneath his underwear. “Hm. Let’s see. What am I into?” His cock was ready for me, hard and direct. Quite sudden, someone pounded against the stall door. “Will you hurry the hell up?”

Noah licked my tongue and ignored the commotion. He moaned with absolute pleasure. Cocking his head back, he eyed the door handle. It was moving.

“Fuck off!” Noah yelled. The jiggling handle stopped moving.

“There we go.” Noah sat against the top of the toilet seat, slowly unclasping his belt buckle, analyzing my every move.

“Is this going too far?” he asked.

Nodding my head, I kissed the side of his neck and slowly sucked against his fair skin. Sweet. He tasted so fucking sweet. I trailed my lips up to his ear, pausing near his cheekbone.

“I want to blow you,” I whispered. Giving head was always something I felt good at. Taking care of my partner was almost a source of pride for me. It felt like I was the one who held the keys to his pleasure.

Noah’s face was flushed red. He was waiting for me to act. “What’s holding you back from doing it?”

The voices in the bathroom vanished briefly as people trickled back into the main room. I looked back at the door to the stall. “Nothing. Nothing at all,” I said, slowly falling to my knees.

Noah didn’t have to unzip his pants. I controlled the situation. The zipper parted the opening smoothly, and inside was my present. The urge to grab it immediately took over, but I let him feel me first. His hand trailed down my back, firmly gripping my ass.

“Open that sweet mouth,” he whispered.

Opening wide, I felt his warm spongy head brush against my tongue, enough to tease me. I rolled my lips over him, forcing down every inch.

“Fuck. You’re really good at this,” he said.

His hands grabbed the back of my head forcefully. I kept my mouth open wide, tongue stretched out before him. There was nothing stopping him now, and I could already taste the sweet nectar dripping from the head of his cock.

Looking upward, I gazed into those mesmerizing green eyes. Noah thrust forward before issuing a commanding sigh of relief that seemed to come straight from the center of his throat.

The constant temptation gnawed at me. I wanted to take off every article of clothing and become fully submissive for him, but the location was less than allowing. Rolling my slacks to the center of my thighs was about all I could do, but it was enough to stroke my cock alongside his for a brief moment.

“Kiss me again,” he moaned, leaning back against the wall. My lips tightened around his until I felt like exploding.

Noah’s hands gripped my cheeks. Panting for air, he brought me closer to him. We kissed one more time before he pushed me back down onto his cock. My tongue did the rest of the work.

When I saw his balls jump into the air, I knew what came next. The contractions caused his cock to bob playfully against the roof of my mouth. Expanding, the shiny, soft head pulsed. I could taste him, the sweetness that I desired more than anything, but he wasn’t there yet. It took a few more slides to push past that barrier.

A fountain of cum escaped him. His body jerked back, but his hips thrust forward. “Fuck.”

Searing pleasure, almost like fire, rose up into his body. I knew that feeling all too well. I craved it.

“Fuck!” Noah lurched forward, fingers wrapped tightly around the back of my head. Inch by inch, he retreated, eyes glazing over. The look of surprise was priceless.

“Where’d you learn how to do that? You had me busting in minutes,” he said.

Laughing and swallowing, I slid my pants back up and fastened the belt buckle. “Years of practice,” I said. I unlatched the door before Noah could get his belt buckled. He was frantic. “You owe me, by the way. I’m going to have blue balls now,” I said.

Noah ran after me when he saw that I wasn’t stopping for him. When I reached the bar, I flagged the bartender over. “Whiskey for me,” I said. “And you?”

“I’m good. I only drink on special occasions,” Noah said.

“This isn’t a special occasion?” I wiped the back of my hand across my lips and smiled.

The bartender handed me my shot. I lifted it into the air before washing it down. Noah looked worried. Did we move too fast too soon? Maybe, but now that I had gotten his rocks off, I felt a little worn out. The answer to that question would have to come at a later date.

“We should see each other again,” Noah insisted.

“I thought you said this was just fun,” I said.

Noah shifted in his seat uncomfortably and leaned forward. Something was definitely going on with him. “Maybe it’s not just fun,” he whispered. “Maybe there’s more to this.”

“I’m afraid I don’t know what you mean,” I said.

Gesturing toward the exit of the bar, he asked, “Can we talk outside?”

“Sure,” I said. “Let’s go.”

As we walked outside, I fastened my arms around my chest. The air felt colder now that the heat from the concrete had dissipated. Noah offered me his coat, but I declined. We walked to the back of the parking lot where it was a little quieter. Noah stopped and sat against the curb.

“Adam wants to meet you,” Noah finally said.

Laughing, I glanced over at my car. “That actually reminds me… I’ve got his coat in the car.” Noah pulled me back down as soon as I tried standing up.

“I’m serious. He wants to meet with you, but he’s not very good with people,” Noah said.

My smile began to fade. “Adam Newton wants to meet with… me? Noah, what the hell are you talking about?”

It seemed unbelievable that the most famous photographer in the scene even knew who I was, but it all started to make sense: Adam standing on the stairs, Noah taking my champagne glass, the coat… that fucking coat.

“You were stalking me,” I said, finally flinging myself from his grasp. “You’ve been following me the whole time!”

I tripped on my feet and scraped my arms across the asphalt. In an instant, I felt the painful heated sting grow against my skin.

“Look, it’s not what you think. He likes you. We like you,” he said.

“Wow, okay. On second thought, I think you should just leave me alone.” I managed to grab the keys from my pocket.

Before I started the car, I took one last look at Noah. I was a little angry, but mostly, I was confused. What the hell did they want from me anyway, a fun time? Why go to such great lengths to get it?

I rolled down the window and held Adam’s coat in my hand. “I should have known he was a freak,” I said.

Noah’s defiant eyes shined against the streetlight. “Aren’t we all?” he asked. “Freaks.”

“Just stay away,” I said. “I mean it.”

My foot slammed on the gas, and I sped out of there with only one thing on my mind. Sleep. I needed to go to bed. I needed to never go out again. The worst was that the hints were always there, right in front of my face. They were using me the whole time, but what for?

At the nearest stoplight, I reached inside the pocket of Adam’s trench coat. I felt a small envelope. Photos, I thought. Suddenly feeling a little excited, I pulled them out. One by one, I filtered through them.

“Holy shit,” I whispered.

All of the pictures were of me.