Hayden held out his finger, wagging the diamond in front of my face. Dazzles of light reflected all around the room. “It’s beautiful, Hayden. Leo did such a good job picking this out.”

“Did someone say my name?” Leo walked into the room, carrying two drinks. He handed me mine and sat down.

Hayden couldn’t keep his excitement at bay. He was exploding with joy and happiness. “And we want you to be the best man,” Hayden said.

“You guys, I’d be honored,” I said. “When is it going to be?”

“This summer,” Hayden said. “You should bring a hot date. What about Noah?”

Noah. Oh, Noah. “I don’t think that’s going to be an option,” I said.

“I told him last night what happened,” Leo said.

Hayden tensed up apologetically. Apparently the whole world knew about my tragic date with Noah. “Shit. I’m sorry, Hank.”

“I have other things to worry about,” I said.

Leo sat on the couch, holding Nathan against his lap. Hayden quietly ran to the kitchen to prepare the baby’s finger food. Tucked away in the bookshelf behind Leo was the last Adam Newton photography book. I walked over to it and picked it up.

“You did the right thing,” Leo said.

“Did I?”

The question was rhetorical, but Leo responded quickly. “You did.” Noah was fun. No, he was more than fun.

“What do they want from you, anyway? Oh, wait. What they want is obvious,” Leo said.

“The pictures… I’m going to get rid of them,” I said.

Hayden came out from the kitchen and set down a plastic plate of chopped fruit for Nathan. “Can I see them before you do?” he asked.

Holding his baby in the air, he said, “Yes, we’d all love to see those photos again, wouldn’t we?”

I gave my best eye roll for the cute family. “I was younger then, and a hell of a lot more fit,” I said.

“You should just own it,” Hayden said. “I mean, who cares what other people think?”

“Hayden,” Leo whispered.

He was definitely right, but my kink was special to me. It wasn’t something I wanted out in the open.

“If everyone knew about it, it wouldn’t work. I like that it’s not out in the open. It’s discoverable. Does that make sense?”

“No, but I’ve always been pretty open about things,” Leo said, shrugging.

But Hayden knew what I was talking about. For most of his life he wasn’t open about his bisexuality. “I get it. It’s yours. You want to own it.”

“And I want to share it, but only with the right person,” I said. Or… persons? Shit, I didn’t know anymore.

“Talk to them. Maybe you three have more common ground than you think. Maybe this whole thing was a misunderstanding,” Hayden said.

“You could be right, Hayden. What if Adam is trying to make a comeback?” Suddenly, it felt kind of good that they were singling me out.

“Wow. You’re like a celebrity,” Hayden said. “That’s kinda cool.”

Leo was too focused on the baby to listen, but I knew what he thought. It was more trouble than it was worth, and all he wanted for me was to find someone solid like Hayden, someone who could offer me something long term and real. A ménage à trois situation probably wouldn’t offer me that.

“Fuck,” I groaned. The whole thing was too embarrassing to go through. “Kenny Lorel. I’ll never talk to that fucking guy again.” He never told me he was going to give those pictures away.

“The guy’s a notorious snake, and that’s why I want you to be careful. You have to wonder… what’s their relationship with this guy?” Leo asked.

Leo brought up a good point that I never wanted to hear, but Adam and Noah weren’t the only ones with those photos. Kenny Lorel wasn’t a genuine artist like Adam. He was a scam artist and loser, looking to get a few extra bucks from people like me. I wouldn’t let him affect me.

“I guess I should call them back. I’ll see what they have to say.”

Standing up, Leo patted my shoulder. “I think Hayden said something pretty poignant earlier. The warning signs are already there. Why put yourself in an already bad situation?”

“I have a lot to think about, clearly,” I said. “I’m going to go, but I’ll see you this weekend. If you need help with any of the wedding stuff, please let me know. I’ve been bored as hell at home lately,” I said.

And lonely too. So fucking lonely.

Walking to my car, I tried not to think about the big decision that I had to make. Now that it was November, the trees were starting to shed their leaves. The beautiful trail of orange and red led me to my car. Orange, like the color of Noah’s hair. I sighed and shut the door.

I was going to call them and get to the bottom of this. Deep down, I didn’t think Noah was a bad guy, and I did have a good time at Bar Silencio. If Noah proved that they weren’t, in fact, total creeps, maybe we could cultivate a long lasting friendship.

“Noah, I’m ready to talk,” I said.

“Hank? I’m sorry about the other night. I never intended to blindside you like that. I had a lot of fun dancing, and…” Yeah.

Our little stall session was a lot of fun, and I wanted to get kinkier with someone for a long time. Generally speaking, I had been afraid to show my kink to other guys because it was hard to understand. Maybe Noah was different.

“Can we meet somewhere?” I asked him.

“Please. I’d love that. I want to apologize to you in person.” The desperation lining his voice was as thick as syrup.

“I need to speak with Adam too. I need to know what’s going on with you both. Last night was a little weird, man,” I said.

“Come over to 43^rd and Washington. Adam has an apartment down there. We can all have drinks and talk,” he said.

“Champagne, right?” A faint smile broke out onto my face.

“I’ll take a shot if you want me too. I’m here to make you comfortable,” Noah said.

“I’ll be there in twenty.”

* * *

Noah said he lived in a high-rise apartment, but he didn’t mention it was the most expensive building in the city. Driving to the Leather and Lace every night, I had seen this place. I was always envious of people who could afford to live there, but I figured I’d never get the chance to buy something so extravagant.

As I parked the car, I saw Noah run out to the front. He waved excitedly and slowed down his pace as soon as I stepped out of the vehicle. “You made it,” he said.

“I’m here for now.”

I felt embarrassed standing in front of him. We greeted each other with a handshake, which made the whole situation even more awkward. Truthfully, I wanted to hug him. I wanted to say that I was sorry. I figured there was some sort of explanation that was going to ease my worst fears, but I could see Leo’s face in my mind. I needed to stay strong.

Noah took a step back and tried to get a read on me. “You okay?”

Swallowing hard, I nodded my head. “Yeah. I’m okay. Are you okay?” I asked.

A glimmer of a smile appeared on his face. “Now that you’re here? Yeah.”

Noah and I stood still for a moment. He bobbed on the edges of his heels before taking my hand. “I feel like there’s been a huge misunderstanding,” he said. “Adam is not at all what you think. You two are totally going to hit it off.”

“Well, I’m here to talk with you both,” I said, warily. “But you’re going to need to explain the pictures.” The whole scenario was bizarre.

As Noah led me into the elevator, he said, “There’s an explanation. Don’t worry.”

His vanilla scent filled the elevator. As we traveled up in flights, I inhaled slowly. Noah was dressed nicely, in a grey cardigan and dress pants. His hair was styled back, but no amount of gel could hide those cute curls.

“You smell good,” I said.

Noah blushed and took a step back. “You always smell good,” he said.

I leaned against the cold metal railing of the elevator doors. “Really?” I asked him.

“Really.”

The elevator doors opened as soon as we reached the top floor. My chest started to tighten with an odd, looming fear. I was going to meet my hero, and he knew more about me than I knew about him.

“You look worried,” Noah said.

“Sorry,” I croaked. “I just don’t know how to handle this yet. I’ve got a lot on my mind.”

He glanced over at the large wooden door. Noah stepped closer to me, nearly touching my chest, but he quickly reconsidered his decision.

“I think you’re hot as hell,” he said.

Every nerve in my body felt tense. There was that aching sensation I always felt in situations such as this. Part of the reason why I loved the Leather and Lace club so much was that it was so dark. You could be whoever you wanted to be without being spotted. This place, however, was bright and alarming.

“You do?” I asked.

“I know why you’re so worried, but you don’t have to be worried when you’re around us. We understand you. And we think you’re perfect,” he said.

We. So, they were together. Probably were in an open relationship. That was another warning sign. Open relationships almost always turned muddy.

Noah waved me forward. Opening the large door, I could see Adam Newton sitting in an assuming red leather chair. He was staring through the windows contemplatively.

The apartment was huge and jaw-droppingly beautiful. Decorated works of art hung on the wall. Some of the pieces looked classic and very expensive, but there were also a few lithographs that framed near the sofa.

Then, there was the photo room. I glanced just long enough at it to see it in its glory. There were new photos in there, or at least unreleased sets that the world had never seen before. Adam was still creating, which excited me. Then, I remembered why I was here.

“Finally,” Adam said, turning around. “We meet, at last!”

Was I mad at him or enthralled with him? My brain couldn’t decide, and my body seemed to be locked in overload mode. I waved. “Yeah. Finally.”

He was as pretentious as I wanted him to be, but as inviting as a friend. When I felt him embrace me, I closed my eyes and leaned into him. What was I doing?

What struck me as curious was the fact that Noah and him were so different. He smelled of leather, and the whiskey rolled off his breath like a southern storm. He had dark brown eyes, like Swiss chocolate or the comforting wood color of a log cabin. I fell into his presence immediately, but I knew I had to keep my guard up.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m… shy.”

Adam Newton, the alpha who didn’t give two fucks about anything, was shy? That seemed unbelievable to me. Laughing, I took a step back. “I’m sorry for laughing, but I’ve watched practically all of your interviews. You don’t seem too shy.”

“What do I seem like?” Adam asked.

“Well… kinda like a—”

“A prick?” The word knocked him a step back. “Yeah. I’ve heard that one before.”

More warnings signs. “That wasn’t the word I was going to use. I was going to say confident,” I muttered

Adam led me over to his grey couch, but he sat back down on the red leather chair. “Interviews are another thing entirely. Nobody tells the truth about themselves. You plan it all out months in advance.”

“You must feel free in those moments,” I said. “I wish I could mold a character like that.” But I did. Every single day, I hid what I was into.

“I feel the opposite. Adam Newton can sometimes feel like a prison,” he admitted. “It’s the reason I stopped doing interviews over ten years ago.”

Noah sat down next to me and threw his arm around my shoulder. “He felt like he was starting to become a caricature of himself.”

I understood what he was getting at. I didn’t do too many interviews for the same reason. Plus, I always felt like it was better to stay in the darkness rather than the bright lights. People loved to flock to the lights, but if you waited too long, you were bound to get burned.

“I like mystery better myself,” I said.

Adam loosened up and leaned forward. A big smile formed on his face and his eyes flashed. “I know. You’re a lot like me,” he said.

I wasn’t falling into his trap. The confusion I felt earlier was still there, and since Adam was undoubtedly smitten with me, I decided that there was no better time than now to drill them with questions. “You’re dating.”

Adam smirked. Noah pulled his arm back into his lap. “Is that a question or a statement?”

Shrugging, I leaned back. “I’m curious what your situation is. I’ve never had this happen before, and I’m the owner of a sex club,” I said.

“We’re in love,” Noah said.

My eyelids fluttered as I tried to comprehend all of this. Anger rushed into my chest. “Does he know that I sucked your cock in a bathroom stall?” I asked, feeling my cheeks turn hot.

“Oh, I know all about your little foray,” Adam said, unimpressed. “We’re open. It’s not a big deal.”

“I had a feeling that was the case. I’m not sure I’m into that,” I admitted.

Of course, as soon as I laid eyes on Noah’s freckles, I knew I wouldn’t be able to control myself. I looked back at Adam. The way that he looked at me gave me goosebumps. He had a way of making people feel special.

“Why are you still here then?” Noah asked me. I felt it almost instantly, his hand creeping up my thigh, resting near my growing cock. My mind went back to the pictures of me dressed in lace panties, legs spread for the camera.

“I don’t know why I’m still here,” I admitted. Maybe it was Noah’s eyes or Adam’s dark stare, or perhaps it was because I couldn’t stop wondering why they found me so intriguing. To most of my friends, I was just an average guy.

“The attraction comes as an afterthought.” Adam suddenly stood up and paced the room. “I didn’t anticipate it, but I have to admit, once I saw the photos, I knew I needed to have you. We both did.”

Adam blushed. Despite all of the press he had garnered in past years, he had never allowed himself to look so bashful before. He walked toward the window and looked down at the streets below. “It’s embarrassing to have a crush,” he said.

“None of this is making me feel any better,” I said, eyeing the door.

“Noah and I have been together for a long time. We’re both alphas. It would be nice to introduce an omega into the mix,” Adam said.

Noah shook his head and quickly took my hand. “That is not why we went to your party,” he said.

“Then, enlighten me. Why the hell have you two been following me?” I finally asked.

“Because those photos shouldn’t have been printed and given out,” Adam said. “But Kenny Lorel couldn’t help himself, could he? We stole the prints from his place because they needed to go back to their rightful owner. You.”

“So, you admit it? You’re friends with Kenny Lorel?” I asked, trying not to bite clear through my tongue.

“We hate that son of a bitch,” Noah said.

“You end up at these dinner parties… It’s just the way things work in our world,” Adam explained. “He was bragging about how you were going to have to pay him a large sum of money to silence the photos. An hour later, we stole the prints.”

“But you inspired us,” Noah said.

“You don’t need me to inspire you,” I said.

“Trust me. He does,” Noah said, leaning back against the grey sofa. “And now you’re his muse.”

Adam set his drink down and looked at me with honest eyes. “Look, I know how this looks. It’s fucking weird. You don’t have to agree to do anything, but you have the photos now. As far as I know, those were the only prints. You can burn them if you want.”

Relief washed over me. Suddenly, I wanted to know more. “What do you mean when you say I’m your muse?” I asked.

“We think you’re incredible,” Noah said. He was as direct as I wanted him to be. “How long has it been since those pictures were taken?”

I had to think about the question for a second. Truthfully, it had been a long time. “He was the first guy I ever told,” I said. “I think it had to be around ’96. He promised he wouldn’t show anyone. I should have known. The man has a reputation.”

“We can shut him down for good. One cease and desist letter made public can ruin his career,” Adam said.

“But that’s not why you called me here, is it?” I asked.

Adam cleared his throat and anxiously looked at Noah. “Guess you called our bluff. No, it’s not.”

“You want me to model in a photo-shoot?” I asked, shaking my head.

“I don’t like to phrase it in that way. I want you to collaborate with me,” Adam said.

Did I feel a flurry of excitement? Maybe. A collaboration with my favorite artist was something most guys didn’t have a chance at getting. Was I even allowed to say no to something like this?

“No judgment?” I asked. “I can be myself? I’ve been burned before.”

Noah’s hand dug up against my crotch again. I started to grow hard against his palm. “Do you really think we’re like all those normies you grew up around?” he asked.

I shook my head. “No. I know you’re not. But how am I supposed to know that you’re not like Kenny Lorel?”

Adam walked toward the photo room. Grabbing his camera, he walked toward the both of us and sat down on the other side of me. Suddenly, my heart started to pound against my chest. He leaned over me and kissed Noah. No, they were making out.

When Adam pulled away, he smiled and licked the edges of his lips. “Why are you so worried about sharing your little secret with us?”

I looked at them both. “Because I like that it’s hidden,” I said. “I like that people think I’m a normal guy.”

“Hmm,” Adam whispered. “You’re particular. I like that.”

Of course, he did. That was his whole thing. What was odd was the fact that I was starting to get really turned on talking about it. “I like frilly panties,” I admitted. My heart must have jumped against my sternum when I said it.

Soon, both of their hands were pressed against the front of my jeans. Was this a dream? No. It was very real. “What else do you like, Hank?” The “k” clicked off Noah’s tongue, teasing me closer to him.

I flipped through the pages of my mind, recounting all of the magazines I used to look at as a teen. Women dressed in cute lingerie... I felt jealous of them.

I remembered when I first walked into a lingerie store with my mom. She shouldn’t have brought me there – it was already hard for her to accept that her thirteen-year-old son was gay. As soon as I left that store, I knew there was more to my story. I bought my first pair within a month.

“G-strings?” Noah asked.

“They’re okay, but they’re not my favorite. G-strings don’t give the right impression,” I said.

“So fucking sexy,” Adam whispered.

I had revealed too much. When Adam leaned over to kiss my neck, I jumped away from the couch and tensed up. “I should probably go,” I said.

“Wait,” Adam looked around the room frantically. “Don’t go. Not yet, at least.”

“This is moving faster than I expected,” I said, glancing at the front door. “We can talk about it more on another day.”

“You can leave whenever you want to. But if you stay, I can show you something special,” he said.

I peeked down at the front bulge of my pants. I was enjoying this, which was why I had to make myself leave. Noah stayed silent, but the look in his eyes made me want to stay.

“I didn’t handle this correctly, but I’m not someone who plans things out,” Adam said. “I’m always too fixed on the fucking end goal. I tried to take shortcuts. Now, it’s obvious that the shoot won’t happen.”

“You have my attention, but that won’t last forever. Hurry and show me what you need to show me,” I said.

Adam cocked his head toward the photo room. I followed him as we walked inside. All around the walls were photos hanging on strings.

“This is the reject room. I’ve been filling it up for years now,” Adam said.

The photos were incredible, but they were definitely different from his past collections. Adam never focused on family members or loved ones. That was a subject he told reporters he would never cover.

In these photos, however, his parents were standing with proud smiles on their faces. They were wearing leather harnesses and smiling. “Wow,” I whispered. “These are incredible. Can I see more?”

Without even pausing, Adam reached up and grabbed a set of photos. Handing me a stack, he led me through the other side of the room. “Come on. My room is right through here,” he said.

I raised my eyebrows. “Your room?” I asked.

“Don’t worry. I just want to show you something,” he said.

Oddly enough, I believed him and trusted that he wouldn’t do anything to push me out of my comfort zone. As I walked through the small hallway, I poured through the photos in my hands.

His parents were conservative. I knew that from reading interviews. At first, they didn’t accept him. It wasn’t until he found fame that they realized the errors of his ways.

“Oh, I love that one,” Noah said, leaning over my shoulder.

In the picture, Adam’s mom was standing near her husband. Her palm gripped a long, leather whip. Adam’s father was handcuffed to the bed.

“How the hell did you get them to pose like this?” I asked.

Adam laughed. “I begged and pleaded. When that didn’t work, I bought them a house. After that, they were game to do anything,” he said.

“But they were so strict,” I said.

Adam shrugged and opened the door to his room. “Money will force people to open up. Even your own parents,” he said. “But I have a feeling it doesn’t influence someone like yourself.”

“No,” I admitted. “It doesn’t.” I never cared about money all that much. It was nice to have, but it wasn’t everything.

“But you’re a man of taste,” Adam said with a faint glimmer of a grin. I wasn’t sure if I should feel excited or not.

As we walked into his room, I glanced at his bed. It was neatly made, looking like it was taken straight out of an Ikea magazine. “Over here,” he said, leading me toward yet another door.

He opened the door, showing me the inside of his closet. The interior was nearly the size of my bathroom. As Adam opened a drawer, I peered curiously at him.

“What is it?” I asked. I was quickly given an answer.

The drawer was full of lingerie.

Biting the inside of my cheek, I stepped forward and tried not to feel too enthusiastic. “We’ve teamed up with a designer,” Noah said. “None of these have been worn before.”

“Who?” I asked.

“Andrew Mackintosh,” Adam said. “They’re all custom made, but these are just some samples. He’ll make you anything you want.”

My eyes widened. “I’d be in charge?” I asked.

Adam grinned revealing a set of sharp, pearly white teeth. “Of course you would be,” he said.

“And then what? You show the world?” I asked.

Adam went to close the drawer, but I put my hand inside, stopping him. “Wait,” I said.

“I’m not in this for money or fame anymore. I just want one last show. That’s all I ask for,” Adam said.

I held a pair of pink panties in front of my face. I let the laced fabric brushed against my nose and lips, smelling the clean material. I smiled and turned around to face both of them.

“Why? I thought you were done with photography,” I said.

“I want to experience and push the limits. No one is doing that anymore. Look at all the famous photographers now. Traditionalism is coming back in style, Hank. Once that becomes normalized, we all lose,” he said.

Noah leaned back against the wall. I looked at him, curiously. “We want to test people again,” Noah said. “We want the fetish community to be heard. No more bullshit.”

“It’s also personal. You said you watched my interviews, but I watched yours too. I’m a big fan of what you did in this city,” Adam said.

Adam finally closed the drawer, but I still held the frilly pink panties in my hand. I rolled them into a ball and clenched them in my fist. “Keep them,” Adam said.

I put them in my pocket, quickly walking through the hallway. Curiously, I didn’t walk toward the front door. Both Adam and Noah were standing silently, waiting for me to say something, anything to make them feel better about this whole thing.

“The answer is maybe,” I said. “I need time to process all of this. I have the Leather and Lace club to think about.”

“We want to help with that,” Adam said.

I didn’t know if it was worth putting myself out there like that. I’d be “coming out” all over again. There were plenty of people in my life that I didn’t want in that closet.

Placing my hand in my pocket, I felt the panties. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow,” I said.

I walked out of the apartment and collapsed against the elevator wall. Just as those metal doors closed, I saw Noah’s green eyes staring back at me. A small smile escaped his lips.