Sabrina

“We have to talk about it, you know.”

The milk I’d been pouring missed the glass and spilled all over the counter. “Jesus Dan, you scared me.” I ripped a paper towel off the roll directly in front of me and blotted up the mess. I glanced over at him. “How do you move so quietly with a crutch and that brace on your leg?”

He shrugged and leaned against the counter. “Maybe I’m not quiet. Maybe you’re just too wrapped up in your thoughts to hear me.” He chuckled. “Besides, if I give you fair warning, you might run the other way.”

I didn’t dispute that claim because he just might be right. “Want some?” I gestured toward the milk container.

“If you’re pouring.”

I grabbed a glass from the cabinet above my head, filled it with milk, and handed it to Dan. His fingers brushed over mine and sparks radiated from my hand to every pleasure point in my body reminding me why I wanted to avoid him in the first place.

“You can’t avoid me forever, you know.”

“I’ve been with you all day.”

“Not because you wanted to be.” He looked and sounded like a pouting child, but his words rang true.

After our morning session, I’d wanted nothing more than to put some much-needed space between Dan and myself. Unfortunately, Lexi had other plans. First she asked me to play catch with her, which seemed harmless enough until she asked Dan to watch just to make sure she was doing everything right. After that, her sage green eyes turned pathetic and pleading as she begged Dan and me to play a game of Uno with her. When I attempted to say no, she really turned on the charm and added logic for good measure. After all, Uno really is quite boring with only two people playing.

Lunch followed what seemed like a hundred hands of the card game, followed by Dan’s afternoon therapy session. Shortly after that, Lexi tracked me down and asked me to give Dan a French braiding lesson.

I managed to escape after dinner, sneaking out the back door to explore the grounds. Part of me felt guilty, but I know Lexi would have wanted to tag along if she knew my plans—most likely inviting “Daddy” along—and I really needed the time to clear my head.

The kiss Dan and I had shared still has my head spinning, and that combined with the whole Mr. Mom thing he has going on might skew my vision of him. Rose-colored glasses are lovely, until you’re into someone heart and soul and are forced to take them off and see him in his true light. That happened to me once with Dan and I can’t allow it to happen again.

The walk had helped clear my vision of him. Now if I can only keep it that way for the next few weeks, I’ll be okay.

“Did you hear what I said before?” Dan asked.

“What’s that?”

“We have to talk about it.”

“Talk about what?”

He blew out a frustrated breath and ran his fingers through his hair. “The kiss.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.” I drained my glass in one gulp, rinsed it out, and placed it in the dish drainer on the counter. Just to keep myself occupied, I retrieved the sponge from the sink and wiped down the counter.

Dan grabbed my wrist, forcing me to stop. “Would you slow down and talk to me?” His green eyes bore into mine. “Please?”

I’m not sure if it was the “please” or the frustration in his tone that convinced me to put the sponge back into the sink and lean against the counter, waiting for him to speak.

“Thank you.” He let go of my wrist and took a step back. “That kiss was pretty amazing.” I gave him what I hoped was my best bland expression. He must have sensed that I wasn’t going to comment, because he continued. “There’s something between us, Bri. There always has been.” His smile turned nostalgic. “I remember the first time I laid eyes on you. Do you remember that?”

I nodded and swallowed the lump that had formed in my throat. Apparently my remembering wasn’t good enough…he wanted to reminisce.

“You were taping ankles in the training room. I couldn’t keep my eyes off you. I knew then Sabrina, at that moment, we were meant for each other.”

Tears stung my eyes, threatening to spill. I wanted to stop him, but the lump in my throat prohibited me from saying a word.

“I know you feel it too. You got just as caught up in that kiss as I did, and if Lexi didn’t come home, who knows what would have happened?” His eyes seemed to glow in the dim light of the kitchen and I felt drawn to him. So drawn it terrified me.

“I’ve never forgotten you. Never forgotten what it was like between us. I nearly died when you left me. It was like losing half of my heart.”

Thank the good Lord he said those last two sentences because I’d been starting to melt. His last words actually made me see red. He nearly died when I left him? Ha! What a laugh. I was such a mess, my mother nearly had to sedate me. Thank God it happened at the end of the school year, otherwise I probably would have taken the semester off…that, or flunk out.

Dan must have seen the storm in my eyes because he started speaking quickly, as if he was trying to get it all out before I exploded.

“I know I was a jerk back then. I know I hurt you as much as I hurt myself, but I’m not the same person.” He rubbed the back of his neck and looked at the floor before his eyes met mine again. “What I’m trying to say is that I want you back. I mean, I’d like another chance if you’re willing to give me one. I’ll treat you right this time Bri, I swear I will.”

I have to admit he was giving an award winning performance. He looked sincere enough, but then he always did. I wanted to rant and tell him about how devastated I was back then, how much he’d hurt me. But for some reason I couldn’t. I felt numb inside. Numb and cold. I wanted nothing more than to go to bed.

“No,” I said quietly.

He blinked comically. “Excuse me?” Apparently he’s not used to having women say that word to him.

“No, I’m not willing to give you another chance.” I waited a second for my words to sink in, then added, “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to bed.”

I left him standing in the kitchen with his mouth hanging open.

Dan

Well fuck, that didn’t go like I’d hoped.

What can I do? How can I make her understand?

Before I could delve too deeply into those questions, Jeff came through the door.

“Early night?”

“Tori didn’t feel well so she came home tonight instead of tomorrow.”

Jeff was currently dating the mom of one of Lexi’s friends. They were keeping things under wraps until they figured out where things were going. Since Nancy is a single mother, their alone time is pretty limited. But he seems happy. At least someone’s love life is looking bright.

“You look like somebody kicked you in the teeth,” he said. “What’s up?”

I looked down at the glass of milk I still held. Unfortunately, it didn’t hold any of the answers I need. Turning to the sink, I poured it down the drain and rinsed my glass.

“I asked Sabrina to give me another chance and she said no.”

“Okay, so you still have work to do.”

“Yeah, I guess.” I rubbed the back of my neck. “I don’t know.”

Jeff chuckled. “It really is interesting seeing you like this.”

“I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself.” I scowled. “You know, it’s not like my love life has been perfect. Did you forget about Marie? That turned to shit as soon as she got pregnant.”

“True. But before Marie, you had the life. You were the first guy my age to get laid, and you continued getting it on the regular.”

“Yeah, and that’s what got me into this mess with Sabrina,” I said. “God, I was such a dick.”

“Don’t beat yourself up too much. You know the old saying, ‘A stiff prick doesn’t have a conscience.’”

“But I do. And part of me knew it was wrong while I was doing it, no matter what my father said.”

“Well, you can’t change the past. Just keep proving yourself,” he said. “Sabrina is pretty smart. She’ll figure it out eventually.”

I stared at the ceiling, hoping a game plan would appear. The last time I felt this unhinged was when I was pleading with Marie not to have an abortion. I’m a take-action kind of guy and it drives me crazy when I don’t have control over the outcome of a situation. With Marie, I had something she wanted…money. With Sabrina, I can only offer myself and she doesn’t seem to want any part of me.

That’s not exactly true. When she lets her guard down, I can see the attraction is still there, she just doesn’t trust me. I can show her I’m worthy of her trust, but there’s no way I can make her take a chance on me.

When it was obvious I wasn’t going to fall asleep any time soon, I got out of bed

and ventured downstairs to watch TV. After flipping through the channels a couple times, I settled on an old Seinfeld rerun I’d already seen a million times. Good. Something mindless to distract me from this whole situation.

Unfortunately, it didn’t work. I just couldn’t shut my mind off. If I wasn’t trying to come

up with a plan of attack, I was beating myself up about the past and how badly I fucked up. Then there’s this damn leg. I know my injuries could have been much worse, but not being able to play ball leaves a lot of time for me to do nothing but think.

I pushed back on the recliner until I was laying down and settled my arm over my eyes, willing sleep to come. Hopefully Sabrina is getting a good night’s sleep. One of us will need a clear head in my therapy sessions tomorrow.