Kieran: Rain check on lunch? Have to work through it.

My heart drops at the text. I know it’s only been a day, but I’ve been anxious to see him in person again. Since it’s my day off, treating him to lunch seemed like a perfect idea. Texting has been nice, but I long to see his smiles in person, and not just imagine his responses in my head.

Ted: What is your favorite take-out? I’ll drop it off for you. Don’t want you to go hungry.

I’m worried that I’m crossing the boundaries between caring and pushy, but I can’t imagine that ass of a boss, even if Alexander isn’t his direct boss any longer, worrying if he goes all day without a bite to eat.

Kieran: Chicken tikka masala from Taj Mahal. That would be amazing. I have to have this presentation ready by 2 and won’t have time to grab anything for myself.

Ted: I’ll bring it by before noon.

Kieran: Thank you!

Now that I no longer have our date to look forward to, my mind is free to plan when I can next see him. Would trying to squeeze him in for an after-work coffee, or in his case tea, be too soon? Speaking of, I need to get some tea for the house for next time. Please let there be a next time.

I reach the Taj Mahal just after it opens at eleven. Although I wasn’t going to order anything for myself, their spiced tomato soup smells divine, and I’ve been told it’s vegan. I have to wait for Kieran’s order anyway.

It’s barely a two-minute drive from the restaurant to Kieran’s workplace. I text him to let him know I’m there, but I go ahead on in. The front receptionist wasn’t there last time and I expect to leave the food with him, but he waves me on back.

“Delivery.”

Kieran’s nose is almost touching the computer screen as he squints and moves the mouse around. He’s so consumed with his work, he doesn’t hear me.

“Kieran.” I lower my voice and gently touch his shoulder, but he still jumps. His hand braces against his chest. “Sorry, I tried not to scare you.”

His laugh is embarrassed as he fans himself. “Whew. Thank goodness I’m too young for a heart attack.” His eyes fly wide. “Not that you’re old. I wasn’t comparing. I–”

“Food.” I cut him off and raise the brown bag up to chest level. “Where do you want it?”

A throat clears behind my back. “Kieran, is the presentation for the Crawford proposal finished?” I turn toward the voice, slowly, because I know who I’ll find. His perusal obviously finds me lacking, because he can barely contain his disdain as he says, “We’ve met before.”

“Yes, we have.”

Since this wasn’t a date, I’m still wearing my jeans and t-shirt from grocery shopping earlier. But he isn’t going to make me feel shitty about that. If anything, I win, because I have better hours and don’t have to strangle myself with a tie to do it.

“But we haven’t,” a bubbly voice pops from behind Alexander, and a short, round, and bubbly woman to match the voice holds out a hand to me. “I’m Maureen.”

Kieran’s boss. I already know this, but I find it interesting that she doesn’t feel the need to tell me.

“Oh, right,” Kieran says with a short shake of his head. “Ted, this is Maureen Mueller, my boss. Maureen, this is Ted Olson.”

“Pleasure to meet you,” I rush to say. I don’t wait to hear if there was going to be a descriptor after my name. After all, we’ve only gone on one date, but hearing the word friend by itself would be a bit spirit-crushing.

“That smells delicious. Next time you decide to spoil Kieran with take-out, he’ll have to warn us first. My ham sandwich looks rather pitiful in comparison.”

“Next time, I’ll be happy to pick something up for you too.”

Maureen tugs on my arm, feeling my bicep I notice, and Kieran does too based on his amused expression.

“Ha ha!” she cackles. “You think I won’t take you up on that. Just you wait. Ted, it was a pleasure, but I have to get back to it.”

I smile after her, but not for long. “I think it’s best if you leave. Kieran doesn’t exactly have the time to be social right now. We’re on a deadline,” Alexander says.

I set the food on the seat of the chair facing his desk, and nod to Kieran. His quick smile vanishes the second Alexander turns the glare in his direction, and he refocuses on his work. Alexander follows me to the front of the office.

“By the way, you have a little something in your beard,” he says, motioning with a finger to the side of his mouth. An amused puff of breath flares his nostrils before he focuses past me and walks away as if I was never there.

I refuse to give the fucker the satisfaction, but inside my truck I pull down the visor mirror to find a small orange speck of soup clinging to my beard. Hardly a disaster. Alexander’s going to have to try a lot harder than that if he thinks he’s going to rattle me with such an insignificant blunder.

* * *

I wait until Craig is no longer busy with a customer before I bombard him with birthday wishes. The customer, a college-age woman who looks like she threw on whatever was closest and freshest on the ground, turns when she hears me wish Craig a happy birthday and repeats it with an “awww” tacked at the beginning.

“Thanks, Jackie,” Craig says with a wave as the girl retreats again to the front door. “Good luck with the Fume Knight!” He gives her a wicked chuckle.

“You’re evil,” she calls back. “I take it back. Horrible birthday to you!”

With the store empty for the moment, Craig sits on the stool resting behind the counter. I hand him a birthday card, which he opens with the finesse of a ten-year-old.

“Thanks, man,” he says as the gift card to the sushi place he likes so much falls into his lap. “I know where we’re going for my birthday dinner.” He snaps a picture of the gift with his phone and begins to tap at the screen, probably informing Zach of dinner plans.

“Did you guys have fun this weekend?”

At Zach’s request, Craig took the whole weekend off so he could treat him to a mini vacation in Boulder. Hopefully I didn’t just open myself up to too many details, but before I can kick myself, Craig smiles.

“Yep. Speaking of, I hear you had a date this weekend.”

“You talked to Kieran?”

“No,” Craig says, drawing the word out with a suspicious look. “Jonathan stopped by after his class to tell me happy birthday. Why … was your date with Kieran?” Craig’s voice gets louder and higher with each word he utters.

“You know, since it’s your birthday, I think you should take the rest of the day off. On me,” I say, trying to flee to my office and hide, but Craig stops me.

“Dude, I don’t care if you are my boss, you cannot run away from me on this. Kieran is one of my best friends. Why didn’t you tell me you like him?” Craig raises a finger to his chin. “Come to think of it, why didn’t he tell me he likes you?”

“It was a Tinder date. I didn’t realize it was him.”

Craig presses his lips firmly together, and I know he’s trying not to laugh.

“I will fire your ass,” I say, and Craig’s eyes widen in surprise.

“You really like him. I’ve never seen you act like this before. Did the date go well? Jonathan was skimpy on the details.”

“That’s because Jonathan was gone all weekend.” As usual. “And I’m not talking about my dating life with my nephew or an employee.”

Craig rubs at his chest. “Oh, so when the store needs me, we’re equals. But I try to open up and share a piece of your happiness, and this is how you respond. Cuts deep, man.”

If I were honest with Craig, and with myself, I’m dying to talk through all this Kieran stuff with him. He’s right. He knows Kieran better than anyone, but using Craig’s insider info feels somehow dishonest. I want Kieran to like me for me, not because I picked the right restaurant or movie.

“I’m going back to being a hermit. Life was easier then. People left me alone.”

Craig pops off the stool and tosses an arm around my shoulders, making me incredibly uncomfortable.

“Everyone needs love, man. Even lonely old gamers like you.”

I shrug his arm off. “I take it back. No early release for you today.”

“What’s this about early release?” a new voice says from behind me. I was so wrapped up in my argument with Craig that I didn’t even hear the doorbell jingle.

Zach steps up to the spot under Craig’s arm that I just vacated and tilts his cheek, immediately receiving a kiss.

“Thanks for the gift card, Ted,” Zach says with a rosy glow on his freshly kissed cheek. “I mean, I know it wasn’t a present for me, but since I’m benefitting, I thought I should say thank you too.”

“You’re welcome.” Craig might be driving me crazy this afternoon, but Zach is too much of a sweetheart to deserve my ire. “Fine. Go ahead and take off. Happy freaking birthday.”

“What did you do?” Zach’s head angles so that he’s glaring at Craig over the top of his glasses.

“Nothing.” Craig raises his hands in protest. “Apparently Kieran and Ted went on a date this weekend, and I’m just trying to get some details. It must not have gone well, because Ted has turned into Super Grump.”

I sputter out the words, “It went fine,” before realizing my mistake.

Craig’s eyes brighten. “Oh really. Is there a second date on the horizon?”

I really should keep my mouth shut, but my mouth has other ideas. “It was supposed to be lunch today, but he had a work thing come up, so we had to cancel.”

Zach frowns, but Craig’s eyebrow ring dips as he quirks his mouth to the side.

“I know that look. Butt out, Craig. I do not need you meddling in my love life, and I’m sure Kieran doesn’t either.”

“Oh, kind of like how he totally butted out when Zach and I were on the outs last summer?”

Zach laughs. “You’d better be glad he didn’t butt out. Or Mrs. Hill. Or Ben. You could have never won me back all on your own. You required epic-level groveling.”

“Out. Both of you. Go enjoy your birthday.”

“This isn’t over,” Craig calls over his shoulder as Zach drags him to the door. “I will see you act like an idiot in love if I have to wait all year.”

My phone dings with a new text message.

Kieran: Presentation is finished. I can finally eat my Taj Mahal. Thanks again for bringing it to me!

Ted: You’re welcome.

Kieran: I was worried maybe this was all some elaborate April Fool’s joke. I was happy to see you.

Ted: I would never joke about wanting you. FYI, you should be receiving a package from me soon. Today or tomorrow.

Kieran: Oh really? Do tell.

Ted: It’s nothing. Just something I thought you might appreciate.

With as crazy over Kieran as I already am, Craig isn’t going to have to wait that long.

* * *

Kieran: I got your package.

Ted: Baby, I’d know it if you had my package.

Ted: Yeah, sorry for that last text.

Kieran: It made me laugh. So, umm, what exactly is this present?

Ted: It’s a trainer set. Start small. Work your way up. I thought it might make things less scary that way. But you don’t have to. It was just an idea.

Kieran: And it was fun buying me toys?

Ted: That too.

Kieran: Were you imagining me using them?

Ted: Maybe.

Kieran: I have the package open. Tell me what I should do first.

Ted: Are you trying to sext me?

Kieran: Trying being the operative word.

Ted: Well if you’re trying to make my dick hard, you’re succeeding.

Kieran: And would that hard dick happen to have a piercing in it?

Ted: Maybe.

Kieran: Pic?

Ted: No. I’m already blurring my no sex deal with sexting. No visuals.

Kieran: :(

Kieran: So what do I do first?

Ted: Get naked and lay a towel down on the bed.

Kieran: I don’t think sexting is usually this practical.

Ted: Yes, well the first time you try to stick something in your ass, you’re going to get lube everywhere and then the slippery plug is going to slide out from your hands and get slick everywhere. It’s going to get messy.

Kieran: :) You know this from experience?

Ted: YES

Ted: So do as I say!

Ted: Please

Kieran: Okay, I’m naked. On a towel on the bed.

Ted: Get some lube on your finger and rub it around your hole.

Ted: Then when it’s nice and relaxed, push the tip in.

Ted: Are you there?

Kieran: Uh huh.

Ted: Get a little more lube and push it in. Wiggle your finger as much as you can inside once you’re relaxed.

Kieran: That’s good.

Ted: Fuck.

Kieran: I’ve got my finger all the way in.

Ted: God I’d love to see that.

Kieran: No visuals. Your rule. Sorry now, aren’t ya?

Kieran: What are you doing?

Ted: I’m fisting my cock, thinking about you lying there with a finger inside you.

Kieran: Can I try the plug now? It’s about the same size as my finger.

Ted: Lube it up and go slow. Don’t force it. Just relax and breathe.

Kieran: duck popsicle

Ted: ?

Kieran: Sorry I’m on speech to text now. Both hands occupied. Didn’t translate well plus autocorrect.

Ted: Is it in?

Kieran: Yes. I’m back to texting now. Just had to wipe my hands on the towel.

Ted: You’re welcome

Kieran: :-P

Ted: I wish

Kieran: It’s all the way in now. If I thrust my hips up and down, it rubs against my prostate. Fuuuuuuuuck.

Kieran: I’m imagining it’s your finger inside me. What are you doing?

Ted: I’m imagining the same thing. God, I bet you’re tight.

Kieran: So tight.

Ted: And I’d suck your cock down my throat while I was fingering you open.

Kieran: Fuck, Ted. I’m going to come.

Ted: I came at duck popsicle.

Kieran: You suck. Don’t make me laugh, I haven’t come yet. Make me come Ted.

Ted: Imagine that I’ve been sucking your cock and fingering you open. Getting you ready for my cock.

Ted: And then I press it against your hole. My cock is hot, but my piercing is cold and it makes you shiver.

Ted: Little by little, I press inside you, until the ball of my piercing rubs against your prostate, and you come like a fucking fountain.

Kieran: Yeah. That did it. Thanks.

Ted: You’re welcome.

Kieran: And thanks for the present.

Ted: You’re very welcome.

Kieran: I’m going to clean up now. Good night.

Ted: Good night.