I will kill the son of a bitch.”

“Is everything okay over here?” I ask after Craig’s very vocal threat forces me to exit my office and investigate.

Kieran sits on a stool beside Craig, who looks like he’s chilling out rather than working behind the counter. That’s okay. It’s dead this time of night on a Saturday, and we’re minutes away from closing. I heard Kieran arrive earlier but thought it best to remain tucked away and out of view. I’m feeling a little exposed after Wednesday at his office. I was on the cusp of embarrassing the fuck out of myself and asking him to dinner. On Valentine’s. Thank god his asshole boss stopped me before I could follow through on the humiliation.

“Everything’s fine,” Kieran says through clenched teeth, narrowing his eyes at Craig.

Which means everything is not fine, and I want Craig to spill.

“Who are we killing?”

“His boss,” Craig says with a nod at Kieran, who is still glaring daggers at him.

“The Principal Asshole?” I ask and Craig sputters out a laugh, while Kieran has to bite his lip to keep his smile from escaping. “Yeah, I met him a few days ago. I thought he was going to faint from lack of oxygen, since he’s so high above the rest of us. What happened?”

“Nothing.” Kieran says it like it’s final, and I can take a hint.

The clock behind the counter ticks to nine o’clock and I head to the front door, flip the open sign over to closed, and click the lock into place. A light tap on my shoulder has me turning to see Kieran right behind me.

“By the way, I brought you cookies to say thank you for helping me the other day.” He holds out a plastic container with a shy smile. “You really were a life saver.”

I don’t have the heart to tell him I’m vegan and probably shouldn’t eat them. But the thought of putting something in my mouth made by Kieran, specifically for me, is enough to tempt me. I crack open a corner and inhale the chocolate and sugar air that escapes.

“Heaven.”

His smile widens. “I am pretty good at baking.”

My stomach will hate me later, but at least I’ll have the memories of Kieran’s beaming gaze while I eat his cookies to comfort me as I long for death. I take a bite and hold the container out for him. The chocolate chips melt across my tongue, and he’s right. He’s really good at baking.

“Oh no,” he says, “I taste-tested all afternoon. These are for you.”

“Thank you.” I hold the container close to my body. “I’m going to put them in my locker so I don’t have to share with everyone.”

Kieran follows me back to the break room, and when I grab a broom to clean up the sales floor, he grabs the one next to it. We sweep around shelves and under counters in relative silence, splitting up the store into sections without even needing to coordinate. We meet at the front door with our piles of dirt and crap – seriously, how can people be so messy just walking through a store? I grab the dustpan and Kieran follows me to the back again.

Laura steps from the office where she was counting down her till. “Everything’s in the safe, Ted. You guys have fun tonight.”

Tonight is a gaming party, but not for customers. I host them every so often so the employees can check out new games, hang out, and bond. A few special non-employees, namely Kieran and my nephew Jonathan, get invited too.

“You sure you don’t want to stay?” I ask her.

“Both kids are at sleepovers. Believe me, this is a rare opportunity that the hubby and I are not passing up. Maybe next time,” Laura says with a laugh before bundling up and heading out the back door.

Dave slips in just before it shuts, while Craig wanders from the office, talking on his phone.

“Babe, that’s terrible. I’m so sorry. He’s really going to move?” He pauses at the table, where Dave set down a couple of cases of beer. Pulling out a ten-dollar bill, he flaps it in front of Dave, who snatches it away and gives him a thumbs-up. “What about Ben? Okay, I gotta go, but text me if you need me. Love you too.”

Kieran and Dave both roll their eyes at Craig’s sappiness, but I think it’s kind of nice. Craig’s a lucky man, in my opinion. Of course, I know Kieran’s just doing it to give him shit. The man went to all that trouble to help the couple get together, so there’s no way he’d be cynical about them now.

“Sorry. Zach just found out his aunt has Alzheimer’s.”

“That’s terrible. Does he need anything?” I ask.

“No, but thanks,” Craig says.

“Is this Parker’s mom you’re talking about?” Kieran asks. I’ve never met Parker, but presumably Kieran has at a dinner party Craig and Zach held last month. I wasn’t invited, curse of the boss I guess, but Mrs. Hill told me all about it. “Is he okay?”

Craig nods. “Yeah, but he’s decided to go back to Oklahoma to be with her. So, Ben is out a roommate. Again.”

Dave answers the banging at the back door as two more guys step inside. The first is Elijah, a CSU student and part-time employee. The other is my nephew and roommate, Jonathan.

Jonathan made the trek from Louisiana to Colorado to attend CSU for forestry science a few years back. He lives with me because it was the only way his parents would agree to let him attend a college so far away. My brother jokes that his wife is a helicopter mom, but really, they both worry. Jonathan is technically hard of hearing, but without his hearing aids, he says he doesn’t hear more than a low rumble. With his hearing aids, he can sometimes hold conversations if the room is quiet enough and the other person’s voice is deep enough, but mostly relies on sign language. It isn’t possible for him to hear much in a noisy room, except to get a feel for what’s going on. A burst of noise might get his attention, but he wouldn’t be able to make out voices. He and I talk a lot at home, but he’s never been able to hear his own mother’s voice.

We all gather up our things and head to the gaming room. I lug the beer, while the others lay out hordes of junk food on a table in the middle of the room. Some blessed individual brought Mountain Dew. Later on, I’m treating the group to pizza delivery from a place that offers a vegan option. I’ve only ordered an individual-sized vegan though, so the others can have their piles of meat.

Everyone claims a screen – I pick the one with the blue gaming chair that still has a lot of cushion to it and log in to my account. We play the new Kingdom Come game for a couple of hours before I have to take a break and stretch my legs. I wander around to watch the others play, cheering them on or wincing in sympathy when something goes wrong. Kind of like how other folks act when watching football, vocally participating as if they themselves are the ones playing.

Kieran joins me for a stretch behind Craig’s spot on the sofa, watching as Craig and Elijah team up to go two versus two for the Crimson Days event that they are reviewing for Destiny 2. The previous events for the game were a little on the “meh” side, but a few kids were raving about this one so they decided to be the guinea pigs.

“Has your car been giving you any more trouble?” I ask him while keeping my eyes firmly on the screen in front of me. Totally something a friend would ask, right? I can practically feel the sigh collapse his shoulders next to me.

“Yes. I had to jump it again yesterday. Fucking cold weather.”

“You need a new car.”

“New car. New job. New place to live. What don’t I need?”

This does get my attention away from Craig’s game. His blue plaid clad shoulders are slumped and he kicks his red Converse together absentmindedly. “Why a new place to live?”

“His roommates are dicks,” Craig tosses over his shoulder. Kieran flips him off and Craig returns it, causing Elijah to complain about Craig’s focus.

“After I came out to the guys in the house last year, well, they haven’t been outright hostile. I guess that’s the best thing I can say about it.” He shrugs as if it’s no big deal, but his eyes tell another story. “I knew what they were like. I guess I just hoped that since it was me, they’d reconsider their asshole opinions. But obviously not. The sooner I can get out of that house, the happier we all will be.”

“Craig mentioned earlier that Ben needed a new roommate. What about that?” I can’t help myself from trying to fix a problem when I see it, especially when that problem involves Kieran. I might have a problem of my own. “It will get you away from those douches you’re living with now.”

“That’s a great idea,” Craig says.

Jonathan appears by my side, and I have to remind myself not to do a double-take at the beer in his hand. He’s twenty-two now.

Craig and Kieran chat more about the roommate situation, but I don’t pay attention because Jonathan wants to know what he’s missed.

“Kieran’s roommates are assholes, and he needs a new place to live. I suggested Ben, since he’s looking for a new roommate,” I sign to him.

“Hello. We have a guest room. He could stay with us.” Jonathan looks at me like I’ve grown three heads as he signs.

“No.”

It’s hard enough to act normal around Kieran and not like a teenager with his first crush. If he lived with us, I wouldn’t be able to keep up the act. I’m trying to be his friend – a supportive, kind friend. Not the creepy old guy perving on him, or the pathetic old guy pining for him. Just a friend.

“Why not?”

“Because I’ll end up embarrassing myself,” I respond.

“Or you’ll fall in love and live happily ever after.” Jonathan laughs as he signs, knowing that he’s pushing me close to the end of my sanity rope. He flutters his eyelashes and puts his hands in the shape of a heart over his chest. I don’t care if he’s family. I will kill him.

I need to stop hanging out with my nephew. Of course, since he lives with me, that’s not likely to happen. But we need to start setting boundaries or something. He’s young and romantic and fancies himself a matchmaker. He can’t understand how someone could be perfectly happy and still be alone.

It doesn’t help that he picks up on clues that others miss. Like the fact that I’ve always had a soft spot for gingers. Or the fact that I hang on Kieran’s every word like they’re damn diamonds dripping from his tongue.

“Or you’ll just have to watch me walk around with a boner all the time. Still think it’s a good idea?” I sign.

Jonathan’s face morphs from happy to horrified and he slowly backs away.

“Never mind. You’re right. Bad idea. Truly, truly terrible idea.”

Gaming continues until after midnight and I need another break, this time adding caffeine to the list of needs. I’m going to be feeling this in the morning, but I’m having too much fun to care right now.

Kieran joins me at the snack table, taking another slice of now-room-temperature pizza. He’s just set his teeth around a bite of pepperoni when Dave asks, “So Craig, did you ever decide about that Prince Albert?”

Kieran’s sharp inhale has him choking, and I pound on his back. He’s too cute and innocent sometimes. There’s a bottle of water on the table nearby, and I snag it for him, twisting open the cap. He gulps it down, panting heavily afterward in a way that has my dick taking notice.

“Jesus, Dave, give a guy some warning,” I say, but add, “Although, yeah Craig, I want to hear this too.”

“Not me. I’ll be over here with headphones on,” Elijah says and runs back to his screen with his ears plugged, singing, “La la la la” until his headphones are in place and muffling our conversation. He’s set up next to Jonathan, who still plays, unaware of the conversation going on behind him. That’s probably a good thing. I mean, who wants to hear their uncle talking about genital piercings?

“Oh my god, I never should have told you guys about the gift certificate Zach got me. I really wasn’t looking for committee consensus on my next piercing.”

“So, you’re not doing the PA?” Kieran asks and his face flushes pink. He looks horrified and fascinated, all at the same time. “I’ve never known a guy who had his dick pierced.”

Craig tosses down his controller and turns to us. “Well, if you really want to know, I haven’t decided yet. I want to do it, but the recovery time is a while. I don’t think I can go that long without sex.”

“You can have sex after a few days as long as you aren’t too rough and you use a condom to help keep it from getting infected,” I say without thinking.

Kieran chokes on his pizza again.

“Do I want to know how you know this?” Craig asks.

I grin. “Probably not.”

“What about the other kind? What’s it called?” Dave asks, and I have to wonder why Dave of all people is so interested. In Craig’s genital piercings, no less. I thought Dave was straight, but maybe he too is just horribly fascinated by the whole thing.

“You okay?” I nudge Kieran’s shoulder with mine. “I can redirect the conversation if it’s making you uncomfortable.”

He tries to laugh but a snort comes out instead, and he covers his nose with his hand. Adorable.

“No, I’m good. Just yeesh. Am I right?” He makes a face, then seems to remember that I’ve essentially admitted that I do have a piercing, and he snorts and flushes again. I decide to avoid speaking up to give Craig advice on guiche piercings. I don’t want to kill Kieran.

Elijah pulls down his headphones. “Is it clear yet?”

“Yep,” Dave yells back. “We’re just talking anal bleaching now.”

Elijah cusses and pulls his headphones back on, while the others laugh. The sound catches Jonathan’s attention.

“What?” he signs to me, and I back away from that conversation with a big, “Hell no.”

Craig’s signs as he tries to describe the conversation to Jonathan in my stead are both hilarious and uncomfortable. I don’t think I’ve ever turned this shade of red in public before. It’s all worth it when Kieran pats me on the shoulder.

“Don’t worry, big guy. We won’t corrupt your nephew too much.”

I don’t get time to dwell on the sensations that Kieran’s words are stirring in me, because Craig’s phone makes a sound like a cricket chirping. Craig stops with the pornographic sign language and he checks it.

“Hey, Kieran. Zach says Ben’s on board. He’ll match your current rent, if you can move in next month. Do you have to give your current roommates notice?”

Kieran shakes his head. “Guess I’m moving.”

Jonathan gives me a sympathetic look before giving me a sign that would be literally translated as “Train-zoom-sorry.” What he means is that I missed my opportunity to offer our spare room to Kieran. Or maybe even more specifically, missed out on my opportunity with Kieran.

Either way. Yeah. Train-zoom-sorry.