I wake to a warm, wet mouth around my cock.

“Holy shit!”  I sit halfway up, my eyes wide open, to find the wicked gaze of Iris looking up at me as she sucks my dick to the back of her throat.  I reach for her, but she pushes my hand away.  With her gaze locked on mine, she sucks me in again, and I moan.  A moment later, she releases me with one final lick.

“Did you have a nice evening?”  Iris raises her eyebrows as she crawls over me and straddles my waist.  “Get a good night’s sleep, did you?”

“What?”  I shake my head, still cloudy from sleep.  I don’t know what she’s going on about, and I have no idea what she expects me to say.

She places her hands on either side of me, and slides her body over my cock.  I suck in my breath as she positions herself and slowly guides me inside.  She fucks me slowly for a moment, still staring at me with a strange half grin.

“Do you like that?”  Iris raises herself up again and then slams back down on me.  “You like it, don’t you, Bishop?”

I nod and grip her hips.

“Wha-what?”

“You think I don’t know?”  She moves her hand up and grips my hair, pulling my head back as she glares down at me.  “Do you think you can fuck my sister without me finding out about it?”

She releases my hair, grabs my hands from her hips, and pushes herself off of me.  The cold air hits the sweat covering my body as Iris stomps over to the bed and grabs the blanket.  She wraps it around herself and turns away from me.

What the fuck is happening here?

“Really, Bishop!  What the fuck is wrong with you?”

I stare at her, tempted to hurtle the same words right back at her, but I’m not sure that’s wise.  What the hell is she going on about?

“Don’t fucking lie to me, bitch!”  My father’s fist made contact with my mother’s jaw.  “Do you think you can fuck around without me finding out about it?  Do you?”

I shake the memories from my head.  The last thing I need right now is his voice ringing in my ears.  My body reacts to the sound of Iris’s harsh voice with the release of adrenaline.  I tense automatically, preparing for fight or flight.

“What else would you call it?” she screams at me.  “You slept with my sister!  My sister!”

I feel like my brain is going to pop right out of my ears just trying to come to grips with what I’m hearing while simultaneously trying to keep memories of my father’s tirades from my head.  I push myself to my feet and take a step closer to her.

“You’re the same person!” I yell.

“We are not!” she screams back at me.  She closes the distance between us and shoves me, nearly dropping the blanket in the process.

I stumble backward, steady myself, and glare at her. I stand there, naked and confused, as I tear through my head, trying to come up with some kind of response to this ridiculous accusation.

“Go on,” Iris says, “tell me how you couldn’t help yourself.  Tell me how it’s me you wanted, and you just didn’t know how to find me.  Give me your fucking lame-ass excuses for not being able to control your cock!”

“Excuses?”  I blink several times, wondering if this is all some kind of nightmare. I grab my jeans and yank them on.  “Iris, I have no idea how I’m supposed to respond to this!”

“Don’t bother saying you’re sorry!”  She grits her teeth and glares at me.

“Sorry?  Sorry for what?”  I have no idea what we’re even arguing about.  None of this makes sense, and the yelling is turning me inside out.  “You may not be the same person, but you’re still in the same body!  I’m the first one to admit that this is as fucked up as it could possibly be, but you can’t blame me for that!”

“Who am I supposed to blame, huh?  Seri?  Do you think it’s her fault you decided to fuck both of us?”

“She doesn’t even know you exist!  She thinks you’re dead!”

“I am dead!”  Iris screams as she balls her hands into fists, nearly tearing the blanket as her nails dig into it.  “He tried to kill me, but she’s the one who succeeded!”

Iris grits her teeth and pulls back her lips in a horrific display of frustration.  Her head turns to the left, her mouth closes, and her eyes soften.

“That is not how it happened, and you know it.” The voice is calm and controlled, but it only lasts a second.  Her head jerks to the right, and her voice changes tone.

“She’s the fucker who locked me away, and it’s worse than death!”

“You made your choice,” Netti’s calm voice says.  “You can’t blame Seri for that, and you can’t blame Bishop, either.”

“He was mine!  She didn’t have to fuck him!”

“She didn’t know.  It’s not anyone’s fault, Iris.  You have to be reasonable.”

“Fuck reasonable!”

Stupefied, I can do nothing but stand and watch helplessly.  I want to call out to her, but I not only don’t know what to say, I have no idea which one I would be addressing.  I haven’t felt this level of terror since I was a kid, and my father was still alive.

“This isn’t helping.”

“Blame it all on me then!  It’s always my fault!”

“No one said it was your fault.”

“It all starts with me though, doesn’t it?”  Iris tilts her head left and glares to the right.  “Iris, the fuck up!  Iris, the one who got us all into this mess!”

“You aren’t to blame for what he did.”

“He’s going to kill us!  You know he will!”

“He does not know where we are.”

“He’ll find us.  He always fucking finds us!”  Iris turns her head to the ceiling and screams.

I hold my breath as every muscle in my body clenches.  I feel like I’m watching a horror movie, and when I try to leave, the theatre exits are blocked.  With nowhere to go, all I can do is watch, wide-eyed and immobile as she changes from Iris to Netti and back again.

Iris turns to me, and her face transforms but not into another entity.  She is still Iris, just a different side of her as her anger disappears and tears stream down her face.  She collapses to the floor and covers her face with her hands.

“Iris…”  I drop to my knees in front of her.  I reach out and take her into my arms while she sobs.  My head is pounding either from trying to figure out what just happened or from all the yelling—I’m not sure which.

She shakes and sobs in my arms, no longer changing from one personality to another, and I know she is Iris—only Iris.  She claws at my skin as if dangling from a cliff, and I am the only viable rock to cling to.  I’m also shaking as my own terror of not knowing what to do tries to take over.  I hold her as tightly as I can without crushing her and slowly rock us back and forth on the bare floor.

We stay like that until my knees ache, but I don’t move.

“I died on the river bank,” Iris finally whispers.  “I died there, and she came back.”

“I don’t understand.”  My knees can’t stand the pressure any longer, and I shift myself onto my ass, pulling Iris into my lap and cradling her.

“I know you don’t.”  She sniffs and tilts her head up a little, tucking her face into the crook of my neck.  “Don’t ask me to explain the unexplainable.”

“Maybe I’ll ask Netti.”  I’m probably taking a risk with the suggestion, and my heart pounds as I wait for her to respond.

“Yeah, maybe she’ll tell you.  Seri won’t.  She understands less than I do, and we have to keep it that way.”

“Why?”

“Netti says so.  Seri has to be protected.”

“From what?” I ask.  “You and Netti have both said that, but I don’t know what you’re afraid of.”

I wait patiently for an answer, but she says nothing.  For a moment, I think she has fallen asleep, but she suddenly moves to wrap her arms around my neck.

“Don’t let him kill us,” Iris whispers.

“Who?”

“Don’t let him.  You can have us both if you want.  Just don’t let him kill us.  Please, Bishop.”

Her plea stings my heart.  I need to know more, but it’s obvious I’m not going to get any straight answers from her, not now.  I can only reassure her in the best way I know how.

“I won’t let anyone hurt you.”  I stroke her hair and speak softly.

“Promise?”

“I’ll protect you.  I swear,” I tell her.  “I’ll protect all of you.”

She nods silently as she clings to my neck.  Eventually, her crying subsides, and she shivers.  I pull the blanket up around her shoulders and hold her close to me.

“I’m sorry I’m such a pain in the ass,” she says with a humorless laugh.

“Yeah, you’re all kinds of fun.”  I take a deep breath and kiss the top of her head.  “It’s all right.”

“You care about Seri.”

“Yeah, I do.”

“If you hurt her, Bishop, I swear to God I will fucking gut you!”

“Don’t start that again,” I mumble.  “I’m not sure if I can take any more of this.”

“I mean it!”

“Did I hurt her?”  I take Iris’s face in my hands and stare into her eyes.  “Huh?  You look down deep and maybe consider asking her or something.  I didn’t hurt her, and you know it.”

She looks away from me, but I turn her head back until she meets my gaze again.

“I wouldn’t hurt Seri.”  I lean in close so my breath is touching her face.  “I wouldn’t hurt any of you.”

Iris grits her teeth and turns away from me with her eyes closed.  I let out a long sigh and loosen my grip on her.

“Lie back down,” I say as I lead her back to the rug in front of the fireplace.  “You’re cold.”

Iris lies down beside me and places her head on my shoulder.  I pull the blanket around us, making sure it’s not too close to the fire.

“It’s still cheating,” she says with a grumble.

“No, it isn’t.”  I reach over and stroke her hair.  “If I can put up with all of you in there, you can deal with the fact that there is enough of me to go around.”

“I still had you first.”  Iris snickers.

“Yeah, yeah.”  I hug her to me, suddenly understanding how extremely fragile she is.  Despite Iris’s harsh words, Seri is the strong one.

“I guess I don’t really mind sharing you,” she says quietly.

“Sharing, huh?”  I swallow hard.  “Do I get a say in this?”

“Do you object?”

“If history is any judge, I did a pretty bad job at handling one woman.”

“You’re doing pretty well with us so far.”

“Am I?”

“Yes.”

Iris closes her eyes and relaxes against me.  She is asleep moments later, but I can’t bring myself to nod back off.  I just watch her closely as I try to sort out everything she said.  I can’t make sense of all of it, but it’s clear she is afraid of someone—an unnamed man who wants to kill her.

Do I take this threat at face value?  Is there literally a man out there in the world who wants Iris or Seri or Netti dead?  Or is there someone else, someone unknown inside of her, who wants to take control?  Can someone with multiple personalities have multiple genders as well?

How am I supposed to protect her from that?

And what am I doing here?  Am I now in a relationship with two women occupying the same body?  Am I supposed to have one with Netti as well?  Is there even any point in trying to make sense out of any of this?  I don’t have any answers, so I just hold her.  I hold her, stare at the fire, and try not to think about how I’m ever going to get used to this.

But I am used to it.  I’m used to her presence here with me.  I’m used to her walking around the cabin, helping me with daily chores, and I’m used to her warmth when I sleep.  I don’t want Seri or Iris or Netti to leave.  I like having them all here.

I must be insane.

The woman in my arms stirs.  She yawns and stretches, and I watch her closely as she opens her eyes.  I must be getting used to this because her smiling expression tells me that she’s Seri again.

“Hi,” she says, and then blushes as she pulls the blanket close to her chest.  Her smile disappears, and she winces.

“How are you feeling?” I ask her.

“A little off,” Seri says with a shrug.  “My stomach is still bothering me.”

“Want something to eat?  It could help.”

“Sorry.”  She blushes again and shakes her head.  “I think I need to just get it out of my system.”

She excuses herself to the bathroom for a while.  Solo pounces on me, demanding to be fed.

“Yeah, yeah,” I say to the kitten.  “Come on.  Let’s get you some food.”

He’s much more interested in the caribou meat mixed with broth than he is the milk, so I let him feast on that while I get breakfast ready for me and Seri.  However, when Seri finally comes out of the bathroom, she says she isn’t hungry.  I hand her a cup of coffee, but she only sips a bit of it.

Seri stays quiet as she sits in the chair, ignoring her coffee and paging through a book.  She seems embarrassed by the whole issue with her stomachache, so I don’t say anything about it.  The turmoil from the night before has left me exhausted, so I lie down on the bed with Solo on my chest.  He steps back and forth, treating me like a ball of bread dough.

“Hey!”  I poke at the kitten.  “Your claws are kinda sharp, you know!”

He meows, unfazed, and continues to knead me.  I stroke his fur, noting how much softer it is now.  He looks like a regular kitten and not like a half-starved runt.  He decides to crawl onto my shoulder and stretch out across my neck.  He actually makes a pretty good scarf, and I drift off for a while.

I’m pulled from my sleep by Seri jumping up to make another bathroom trip.  When she comes out, she’s pale.  She shuffles over to the fire with her hand over her stomach.

“You okay?” I ask as I sit up, forgetting about the cat.  Solo tumbles down my chest, rights himself, and then struts off as if nothing happened.

Seri nods her head but continues to wince.  I bring her a glass of water, which she drinks without hesitation, but she still looks pale.

“I think I might have a bit of a stomach bug,” she says with a slight grin.  “Just my luck, huh?”

“I’ll get you some more water.”

“I’m sorry,” Seri says.

“Nothing to be sorry about.”

“It’s embarrassing.  I hate being sick, especially in front of someone else.”

“Lie down,” I tell her.  “Get some rest.  You’ll probably feel better soon.”

Seri drops onto the bed and pulls the blanket up around her.  I check out the fish we’ve been eating, wondering if it might have gotten contaminated, but it looks and smells just fine.  I also feel fine, so I doubt whatever is wrong with Seri has to do with what she ate.

An hour later, she’s burning up with fever.

“Drink this.”  I hand her another glass of water and help her sit up to drink it.

“I’m sorry,” she mumbles.  “Like you haven’t done enough for me.”

“Stop apologizing for shit you can’t control.”  I take the glass away and lower her back onto the pillow.  “Do you want to try to eat anything?”

Seri shakes her head.  I grab the small, round table by the chair and move it next to the bed.

“I’m going to leave the water here,” I tell her.  “Drink it all, okay?”

“I’ll try.”

Within minutes, she’s rushing back to the bathroom.  Time goes by, and she doesn’t come out.

“Seri?”  No answer.  “Seri!”

When she still doesn’t answer me, I open the door to find her on her knees in front of the toilet, nearly unconscious.

“No, don’t…”

Ignoring her, I pick her up and take her back to the bed.  She’s sweating and her skin feels clammy.  I tip over the bucket of kindling, emptying it onto the floor before bringing it to the side of the bed so Seri doesn’t have to get up.  Every few minutes, I force a little more water into her, but she can’t keep it down.

The next morning, she isn’t any better.  Her skin is practically grey.  She can’t keep anything down, and I know she’s in trouble.  I make sure she has access to the water and the bucket, and I leave some crackers in a small bowl for her.  Once everything is set out, I start getting my winter gear on.

“Where are you going?”  Seri asks.  Her voice is weak.

“I’ve got to get the Jeep started,” I say.  “I’m going into Whatì to get you some medicine.”