Ivy

After dropping Chevy back, I went looking for my father. Slater had told me all I needed to be sure this was my father’s doing. They taunted Kelso with his past. They intended to rape him and to kill him. 

My coward of a father has gone into hiding, and so has Parks. There’s one more place my father might have gone, but my desire to talk to Kelso has overcome the thirst to find my father. I’m still trying to figure out what I’ll say, what I’ll do. I need proof he organized this, his links to the bikers, and then I can have my father thrown in jail. He needs to pay for what he's done.

Biting my bottom lip and rubbing my sweaty hands down my jeans, I stride up the porch stairs and knock on the Kings’ front door. Recently I’ve been walking straight in, however uncertainty whirls and builds in my stomach. I have no idea what Kelso thinks or knows. Will he let me explain? 

I’d called Lana earlier, frantic to find out how Kelso was doing. She was reluctant to tell me anything at first, but I succumbed to begging and she took pity on me. She informed me about the kidnapping and the deal Parks and my dad made with the bikers. Disgust doesn’t come close to describing how I felt. How much I hated my own blood running through my veins.

Della answers the door and frowns when she sees me. Then her eyes narrow to slits. Oh God. They all hate me.

“Please,” I beg. “I need a minute with him to explain.”

Della’s features soften at my plea. She opens the door for me to walk through. “He’s in his room.” Her voice is taut, not friendly at all.

“Thank you,” I whisper, and race up the stairs before any other family members can stop me and throw me out.

Opening Kelso’s bedroom door, I look to his bed, but it's empty. I hear the familiar sound of water running. 

I shut the bedroom door, cross the room, and enter the humid bathroom. Kelso is standing under the falling heat as it hits his naked back, his arms extended in front of him, holding his weight.

I softly call his name, and he stills under the water. He doesn’t turn to look at me, not even a glance. “I’m so sorry,” I say with trembling lips, and press one hand to the shower door, badly wanting to push through the glass and touch the man I love. The man I only ever wanted to protect, but ended up hurting instead. 

Kelso’s body tenses, but he remains still under the flowing water. 

“Please talk to me, Kel,” I beg. 

Kelso spins and looks at me. His bruised features pull tight and his eyes are dark with rage. He slowly opens the shower door and steps out, naked. He’s glorious, exuding strength with his muscular body and heavily tattooed arms and chest. The stare he has for me is brokenhearted. I see his shattered heart, and I’m sure he’s about to rip mine in two. 

“What would you like me to say?” Kelso grates out. “You’ve already taken everything from me. I gave you my trust, and you broke it. I gave you my heart, and you shattered it. I gave you my body, and you betrayed it.” Kelso stares at me and then suddenly out of nowhere he roars, “What more do you want from me!” 

I step back clumsily, the furious anger in his voice causing me to tremble. Tears build in my eyes as sadness floods my chest. 

Kelso takes a step toward me. “Here I am. Naked and bare, but there is nothing left of me for you to burn. I’ve got nothing left for you, Ivy, or for anyone ever again.” 

I step back again, a sob ripping from my chest. “I didn’t know. I swear I didn’t realize my dad was capable of something this cruel. I’m so sorry I told him. I thought he’d understand and stop messing with your family if he was aware of the truth. He’s my father, Kel, I never dreamed he’d be this savage.” Saying those words has finally let them penetrate my heart and soul. My father wasn’t always this way, but there’s no excuse; no amount of death or grief makes what he did okay, ever.  

“Why are you crying?” Kelso yells, and my eyes swing up to his. I watch as tears fall down his cheeks and he stares at me with confusion. “You can’t possibly understand the pain you’ve put me through. You can never know how deeply you've hurt me.” He punches his chest hard. 

He’s wrong. It’s pouring off him like a wave, the pain. It’s suffocating and overwhelming. 

“You made me feel dirty again, Ivy. A sensation I haven’t felt since I was a little boy. Something that has taken me years to recover from, and you, the only woman I’ve ever loved, brought it back to me, to torture me for years to come.” Tears continue to cascade down Kelso’s face, and the ramifications of what I’ve done come into full light. I’ve become his torturer, when all I ever craved was to be his savior. “The first woman I trusted obliterated me. Before you, Ivy, I was broken, but now I’m dead on the inside.” Kelso punches his chest hard again. “There’s nothing in there anymore,” he shouts. 

Kelso drops to his knees and his chest heaves as a sob rips from his mouth, the pain causing my heart to splinter a thousand different ways. 

“You’ve ruined me, Ivy. It’s as if you were the one holding me down today,” he whispers hoarsely.

Kneeling, tears cascade down my cheeks as we stare into each other's eyes. Face-to-face. Broken to desperate. 

A million I’m sorrys sit on the tip of my tongue. But I know it won’t be enough. I know what I’ve done is unforgivable. 

Suddenly his eyes narrow with hatred, the tendons on his neck becoming taut. “Leave and never come back, Ivy,” Kelso growls, his breath searing my cheeks. “I never want to see you again. If you see me on the street, we are strangers. You do not even look my way.” 

My whole existence shatters into a thousand pieces, every ounce of strength I’d regained since my mother’s death decimated within seconds, by my own doing.

I nod and stand, shaking. I’ve damaged us beyond repair, and I will not hurt Kelso King for a second longer. His hatred for me runs deep, but it’s his love for me that causes the tears. He can’t bear to be near me, but it’s killing him to say goodbye. 

He rises beside me, his intense gaze darkening more every second I remain in his presence.

Blinking away the blur in my eyes, I take one moment to scan Kelso’s face, committing it to memory. I should go and not say anything else, but I’m brokenhearted and can’t imagine leaving without saying what’s truly in my heart.

“I’ve loved no one as much as I have loved you. And even though I know you’ll remember me as the bitch who destroyed you, I will love you every day, every night, and every second for the rest of my life.” My lips wobble and tears fall unforgivingly. “However, I promise you, because I loathe ever hurting you again, if I see you on the street, I will not allow my stare to linger, I will continue on as if you aren’t even there.”

Kelso blanches at my words, but for only a second. He steps back and lifts his chin, waiting for me to exit his bathroom and his life. 

Trembling, I put one foot in front of the other. My mind tells me to walk faster, while my heart screams to wait and see if he calls my name. Kelso doesn’t. When I’m out of his room and halfway down the stairs, I hear the slam of his bedroom door. It reverberates through me as if lightning struck me on this very spot, shaking my spirit itself. 

I continue down the stairs and out of the house. Proceeding down the porch steps, I cross my arms against my chest, warming my body with hard strokes. 

The night has never felt so dark. 

The air has never felt so cold. 

My breaths have never been harder to take. 

My father has taken everything from me. My family, my happiness, and now Kelso, my love. 

The blood inside me boils for revenge, screams for it, for him to pay for what he’s done to me.

* * *

Kelso

Slamming the door closed, I stare at it, seeing only Ivy’s anguished face, her tears. I will continue on as if you aren’t even there. It’s what I asked for. What I need. 

I step away from the door, my eyes catching on the torn picture, on Ivy’s lit-up green eyes and bright smile.  My vision clouds and my nostrils flare as a roar explodes from my mouth and I slam my fist into the wall. 

My bedroom door swings open and my brother Mackson stands there. His eyes swim with sorrow… for me. 

Yanking my fist out of the wall, I growl, “Follow her. She’ll go to her father sooner or later. I’ll dress and be on the road soon. I want these bastards found tonight.” 

Mack nods, but hesitates for a second before finally shutting the door. 

Turning, I lean against the wall, sliding down to my ass, holding my head in my hands. I miss her already. Today took so much out of me, made me feel things I’d long forgotten, and all I want to do is tell her, share it with her so she can tell me everything will be okay. So she can lighten my burden as she’d done these last few months. 

But where has it gotten me? Here, stupid tears falling down my face as I wish for a woman who broke my trust at the first sign of trouble. Who has been telling me pretty little lies with those soft lips of hers. 

Forgiveness. It caresses my heart and at my soul, whispers that have my heart re-breaking with every plea I deny.