Chapter10
Years later, I would think that my life really officially began in Paris. I’d certainly never felt so alive. I’d never felt so free. So happy. So “more like me” than I’d ever been.
By day, I met up with a group of new friends that Fed had introduced me to. These friends were American women, wives of Testera executives and engineers. Most of us were staying in rented countryside chalets just outside of Paris, and these chalets weren’t too far apart; so, we all met up daily to have coffee, swim, and take the three young children in the group on excursions in the city. My second week in Paris, I even started a “watercolor painting club” with two of the other women, and Fed hired a professional artist from Paris to be our instructor. I also became immersed in the French language around this time, studying for two hours a day, three days a week, with a tutor that Fed had hired for me.
Fed and I spent most evenings together, either going out to dinner in the city or cooking together at home. Fed admittedly wasn’t the world’s greatest cook, strongly preferring my cooking to his own; but he was decent at a few Italian dishes, and several times, he made panna cotta for me, a dessert he excelled at. In fact, the first time he made panna cotta for me, which he flavored with espresso, I declared that it was even better than what we’d had in the restaurant on our first dinner date, which was the truth, and this was saying a lot. This compliment made Fed grin, and his face reddened a little, the first time I’d ever seen it do so.
When eating at home, we usually ate our meals at a table outside, next to a large, oval-shaped pool surrounded by manicured gardens and hundreds of rose bushes. By dinnertime, the two gardeners and two maids that Fed employed had gone home for the day, which gave us privacy to enjoy some pretty lengthy make-out sessions by the pool. Once, after we’d gone skinny-dipping at night with underwater lights in the pool illuminating our bodies, we enjoyed a lengthy make-out session that ultimately led to us making love on a cushioned recliner poolside, with stars twinkling above us in a velvety sky.
Every day we spent together, we became closer, and it wasn’t long before we said, “I love you” to each other. This mutual proclamation of love led to a nearly two-hour-long lovemaking session in our bedroom, with Fed giving me a slow, erotic massage first with his strong hands slick with coconut oil. That night, I quickly learned that he was just as good at giving massages as he was at making love, which was really saying something.
Fed was not only the best lover I’d ever had in my life by far, but he was a better lover than I’d ever even dreamed it was possible for a man to be. His stamina in the bedroom continually amazed me, and this stamina, combined with his “sexual talents,” led to me sometimes enjoying two orgasms a night. One night, over the course of several hours, I even had three. With Fed, I felt more sexual hunger than I’d ever felt before, but also the most profound sexual satisfaction I’d ever had all at the same time. I’d almost started to feel addicted to his body and his touch.
One night, during our fifth week in Paris, Fed arrived home late after a dinner meeting with some of his executives. I was already in bed when he entered our bedroom. The windows were open, allowing a balmy, summer-scented breeze to flutter the sheer, cream-colored curtains every so often. On the dresser, I’d lit a long row of red pillar candles similar to the ones I’d lit the first night that Fed and I had made love.
He came into the bedroom with a low growl, his gaze immediately going to me on the bed while he shut the door behind him. It had been at least twenty minutes since I’d been wearing any clothes. They were now in a heap on the floor.
Teasing him, because I was pretty sure what his answer would be, I asked Fed if he still found me as sexy as he had when he’d first met me. Practically ripping his clothes off, he issued a response in the form of another growl rumbling deep in his chest.
However, when he got into bed beside me, completely naked and already semi-hard, he pulled me close and spoke in a low voice near my ear. “Do I still find you sexy as I did when I first met you? Why don’t I just answer that question by showing you?”
I really liked the sound of that.
He began by kissing my mouth with his full lips firm and warm. Then, he began trailing his kisses a little lower, down the side of my neck to the base of my throat, making me knead the silk bedsheets with the hand I wasn’t using to tangle my fingers in his thick, dark hair. When his kisses reached my breasts, he took a little detour to tease my stiffened nipples with the tip of his tongue, and I began biting back moans. By the time he’d trailed his kisses to my inner thighs, I just couldn’t bite back my moans any longer, not that I even had to.
The chalet was empty except for just the two of us, and Fed had told me several times that my moans and other sounds of sexual pleasure greatly turned him on. So, now with both hands tangled in his hair, trying to direct his mouth exactly where I wanted it to go, I began to lose myself in the passion that I’d been fantasizing about all day.
However, Fed apparently wasn’t quite ready to allow me to lose myself fully just yet. With agonizing slowness, he raked his tongue up and down my pussy lips several times, making me arch my back, becoming desperate for him to move his tongue inward.
“Please, Fed. Don’t tease me anymore. I can’t handle much more of it.”
Seeming to be in a real mood to be cruel, he again gave slow, deliberate attention to my outer lips, although without bringing the tip of his tongue anywhere near my throbbing clit.
Thoroughly frustrated, I heaved a sigh. “I’ll pay you back for this later, Fed. I don’t know exactly when, and I don’t know exactly how, but I do know that I will. I’ll tease you until you’re just begging me to…oh!”
Making me grind my head back into the pillows, hips jerking, he’d finally, and rather suddenly, begun raking his tongue over my clit with a prolonged, low growl.
“Oh, God, Fed. Right there. Don’t stop. Please don’t stop.”
He didn’t, and instead progressively quickened the pace of his deliciously firm, warm, stroking tongue. Several minutes later, I cried out loudly, involuntarily squeezing my eyes shut, as a powerful climax crashed over me in waves. By the end of it, I was actually seeing stars behind my eyelids, little pinpricks of white light that disappeared and reappeared, twinkling, with each surge of my ecstasy.
Once Fed had pulled his body up alongside mine, though, I found that I still wanted more and didn’t even want to wait.
“I want to feel you inside me now. I just want all of you…every inch of you.”
Seeming incredibly eager to give me every inch of himself, he rolled me on my side, facing away from him, hiked a leg up over my hips, and then quickly entered me from behind with one powerful thrust. Moaning, I found the sensation of having my pussy filled with my legs closed to be one of almost unbearable pleasure, slightly uncomfortable in some way but completely rapturous at the same time. When Fed began thrusting, this sensation only intensified, bringing me close to the brink of another powerful climax within minutes.
Seeming to sense this, and possibly wanting to stave it off for a while, he slowed the pace of his thrusting considerably, then soon pulled himself out of me, rolled me over to face him, and hiked my leg up on his hip before sliding his rock-hard cock into my pussy again.
“I want to watch your beautiful face when you cum.”
This was fine with me because I wanted to watch his.
In the glow of the candles, we looked into each other’s eyes deeply many times over the next several minutes, until finally, when Fed increased the pace of his thrusting, I couldn’t hold back any longer. With a loud, prolonged cry of passion, I gave into my cresting pleasure and just let it take me, meeting Fed’s every thrust with my own bucking hips while I saw stars for the second time. Almost at the same time, he growled out his own release, kneading the soft curve of my hip with one strong, long-fingered hand.
A short while later, we rested in embrace without speaking while a stiff breeze blew in through the curtains, cooling our slightly-sweaty skin. Candlelight danced along the cream-colored walls of the spacious bedroom.
Eventually turning my face to look at Fed, I was the first to speak. “This is what I want in my life, you know. This is all I want. I just want this. Just us, together and happy. I just want to know if you want it, too.”
The candlelight revealed Fed’s expression to be one of unmistakable sincerity.
“I do want this…more than anything, Jasmine. I love you so very much.”
Smiling, I reached for his hand and twined my fingers with his. “I love you, too…and I’m starting to think that maybe a happily-ever-after is in our future.”
Fed attempted a smile, but I could see that it was only that. Just an attempt. The smile didn’t reach all the way up to his eyes.
Instantly, I realized that I’d probably made some kind of a mistake by mentioning the words “future” and “happily-ever-after.” This was because even though our relationship and love had deepened, Fed still didn’t like talking about the possibility of a long-term future. He certainly was reluctant to talk about marriage, changing the subject when I’d brought it up during dinner one night, asking if he thought he might ever change his mind about it.
Now, in bed with him, I felt like this was maybe the time to ask him for more of an explanation about his anti-marriage stance when it came to him personally. After all, the previous six weeks in France had taught me that although Fed was often very busy with the company, he wasn’t so busy that the idea of marriage and family someday should be completely out of the question.
However, before I could say anything further to him or ask him any questions, he abruptly gave me a kiss and closed his eyes. “Goodnight, Jas. I’m very tired.”
With some kind of a little ache in my chest, I soon closed my eyes myself, although it was a long while before sleep finally came to me.