Chapter Nineteen
Behind the barns and near the open pasture, Olivia took a sip of lager and grinned at the story Amy’s brother Kyle was telling Nate about Justin’s first black eye, right after he’d broken his leg falling from a cottonwood.
A bonfire crackled in the center of their small circle of chairs, a radio off to the side playing flashback songs from the nineties. Temperatures had finally begun to warm, yet the nights still held a nip in the air. The scent of firewood mingled with fresh grass and blooms.
It had taken two weeks, but the winter wheat had been harvested. They were relaxing this weekend before planting the spring crop. Most of the ranch hands had gone into town, aside from her few close friends, to let off some steam.
She glanced at the blackened sky, twinkling with stars, and a pang of longing hit her. Between Kyle’s story and working the fields, she missed Justin something fierce. Spring had always been his favorite season.
“So then, he waddles right up to me and says, I’m not gonna tell you again. I can ride faster than you with a gimp leg and blindfolded.” Kyle laughed. “Eight years old, and he was stubborn as hell, even then. He’s got this giant cast covering him from thigh to ankle, and the dumbass tried mounting the horse. Fell right off and took a faceplant.”
Nate chuckled and glanced up from the block of wood he was whittling in the chair next to hers. “Sounds like him, all right. I’d like to tell you he grew out of his obstinate behavior in the military, but that would be a lie.”
Nakos cleared his throat. “Must run in the family.”
Olivia sent him a baleful glance. “Said the pot to the kettle.”
With a grin, Nakos looked around her to Nate. “What are you making over there?”
“No clue.” Nate continued to work the tool, wood shavings piling at his boots. “Don’t really think about it.”
“He made me several carvings of Nessie.” She stared at her dog between their chairs. “And Bones. Right, boy?”
The dog barked twice, earning a grin from Nate.
“That’s it. She’s sunk.” Amy pointed her beer bottle at Olivia. “Feed into her Loch Ness obsession and she’ll do whatever you want.”
“I resemble that remark.” Olivia glanced at Nate.
He winked at her, then examined what he’d done. “Huh. Looks like this one’s for Amy.” In his palm was a carving of a camera, no larger than his fist. He tossed it to her two seats down and leaned over to grab his beer from where he’d set it on the ground.
Amy’s brows went up. “This is really cool. Thank you.”
“Speaking of cameras...” Nate tipped his head. “I saw your photos in Olivia’s living room. They’re good. When are you going to start using your new equipment?”
She twisted her lips in a pout. “I haven’t taken anything out of the boxes. I’m just not comfortable with not knowing who they’re from.”
Olivia pinned Nate with a glare, silently telling him to spill the beans.
He scratched his brow with his thumb and shared a look she couldn’t decipher with Nakos.
After a few beats, Nakos nodded in gradual understanding. “Uh, they’re from me.”
Olivia looked between the men, wondering why Nate seemingly wanted Nakos to take credit.
“What?” Amy’s eyes flew wide. “But, why? And to not tell me?”
Rubbing the back of his neck and disrupting his ponytail, Nakos shot a flickering glance at Nate and back again, obviously uncomfortable. “Yours was busted and I had plenty in savings. Consider it a gift.”
She blinked at him as if she’d never seen him before and they hadn’t grown up together. “Thank you. I’ll pay you back.”
“You absolutely will not.” Nakos waved his hand in dismissal. “Take photos. That’s reward enough.”
“But...” She frowned, looking at the carving from Nate. She brushed a strand of long cocoa hair from her face. “Okay. If that’s what you want.”
Closing his eyes, Nate sighed, one corner of his lip curling in satisfaction. He sent Nakos a nod Olivia interpreted as thank you, then took a long pull from his bottle.
Olivia shook her head, not understanding, but kept mum. Honestly, she was just glad he and Nakos were getting along. In fact, the two were developing an interesting bromance. Every time she caught them, they were together working on something or talking.
It made her heart happy Nate was settling in, making friends. He didn’t seem to have anyone of substance in his life and deserved to be around people who cared about him. Nakos wasn’t the only one, either. Amy adored Nate to death and the other guys always made it a point to acknowledge him.
Ever since he and Olivia had sex that first night, he’d gotten better about other things, too. He smiled more and brooded less. At dinner and breakfast, he sat at the table instead of standing or taking his meal to the porch. Aunt Mae had even coerced him into dessert a time or two. He didn’t hesitate when leaning in for a kiss or to hold Olivia’s hand when they watched TV. And he never fell asleep without pulling her to his side so they were wrapped up in one another. He hadn’t gone back to his bedroom, either, except to change, and he’d get no complaints from her.
Their lovemaking was still intense but, afterward, he was forever gentle. She hoped he would start wanting to be more intimate in that regard. Not that she didn’t love wild sex. However, he kept falling back into his comfort zone whenever things got heated. She couldn’t pinpoint why, but she suspected there was a part of him holding onto something dark. At times, he looked at her like he had something to say, to admit. Yet he’d clam up and shake his head.
“Oh, I love this song.” Amy pointed to the radio. “This was from our senior prom, remember? I haven’t heard this in ages.”
Olivia recognized Peter Gabriel’s, In Your Eyes, but forgot it had been their prom theme. “It was, wasn’t it?”
“You were a terrible date.” Amy looked at Nakos. “This was the only song we danced to.”
“Hey, I agreed to attend, not dance.”
“Wait.” Nate leaned forward. “You two used to go out?”
“No.” Amy snorted a dismissal. “Nakos went to school on the reservation. For functions, he’d go with one of us to be included.”
“Against my will.”
Olivia laughed. “Hardly. And you wanna talk about bad dates? At least yours didn’t try to get under your dress at the after party.”
“God, he was a loser.” Amy sighed and blew a strand of hair off her face. “I can’t believe you dated him. For three months. And he thought sneaking you into a hotel room was a clear path for sex. Forcefully, I might add. Wow.”
“I think he was more clueless than malicious.” Olivia figured he’d assumed sex was a part of the whole prom experience. She might’ve considered it had he not acted like a petulant child.
Nate bared his teeth. Seethed. “Where can I find this person?”
Everyone stared wide-eyed at him, but it was Nakos who eventually broke the silence. “Tom Henderson. Quarterback of the football team and had his eye on Olivia since freshman year. He converted to a Mormon after graduation and lives in Utah now with five wives. Or something. And don’t you worry, he walked out of that hotel limping and bleeding.”
“My hero.” Olivia rolled her eyes. “I did knee him in the balls. I had it handled.”
Kyle took a bow in his chair. “And I escorted the fair maiden home.”
“That you did.” She smiled at him and set her hand on Nate’s rigid arm to calm him down. His mouth was still in a tight line, but his shoulders sagged. “Riding on the back of your ten-speed was awkward in an ankle-length gown.”
“Shut up.” Kyle laughed. “I had Dad’s car, thank you very much. And we had fun the rest of the night, if I recall.”
Nate tensed again under her palm. She squeezed his arm.
“Sweet Baby Jesus.” Amy gagged. “Tell me you two didn’t hook up. I might vomit.”
“I second that.” Nakos rubbed his stomach.
Olivia tilted her head. “Want to tell them our naughty tale?”
Kyle grinned. “If memory serves, we were in your bedroom, it was dark, and we...” He paused. “Watched The Breakfast Club. Twice. Popcorn might’ve been involved.” He glanced at his sister. “Get your mind out of the gutter. Sleeping with Olivia would be akin to incest.”
Nate let out a quiet, long exhale.
“Be sure to remember that.” Amy looked at Nate. “So, any sordid high school tales from Chicago?”
“No.” He rubbed his jaw. “I didn’t attend dances. They weren’t my thing.”
And he’d been in juvie by the time his senior year had rolled around. What a shame, too. Prom was like a rite of passage and he’d missed out.
“Well.” Olivia rose. “I’m going to bed. You guys okay putting out the bonfire?”
The others nodded and said goodnight as Nate stood to follow her. With the dog at their heels, they headed inside and to her suite, where she stopped in the living room and eyed her stereo. An idea bloomed, and she sorted through her CDs.
Nate came out of the bedroom, minus his shirt. “You coming?”
“In a sec.” She loaded Hoobastank’s The Reason and told Nate to wait there. She went into her bedroom and fished through her closet, grinning when she found what she was looking for. She changed and stepped back into the living room, arms spread. “Ta da.”
He turned and froze. His gaze skimmed down the length of her navy blue slip dress and back again, heating with desire on the second pass. “What’s that?”
“My prom gown. Can’t believe it still fits. Barely.” She wiggled. “You like?”
“I just swallowed my tongue, but why are you wearing it?”
“Because you didn’t get a prom.” She walked to the stereo and hit Play. “Now, dance with me.”
His mouth opened and closed, but he didn’t move.
She tilted her head, studying him. It didn’t matter how many times she looked her fill, seeing him was always a bolt of electricity.
His feet were bare and his jeans hung low on his narrow hips, worn in all the right areas. His hat was off and she had the strongest urge to rub his bald scalp. Contours of muscle and tats came to life when he shifted the slightest bit. Veins and tendons protruded from his dark skin. His clenched jaw ticked in what she’d learned was nervousness.
But his dark, puppy dog eyes searched hers. In question. With understanding. And a flicker of hope.
He cleared his throat. “I don’t know how to dance. I’ve never done it before in my life.”
“I’ll teach you.”
Closing his eyes a beat, he sighed and looked at her again. First at the dress, then he met her gaze. “I don’t need a...prom. Or whatever this is you’re doing.”
“Sure you do. Everyone should have a night to dress up and act like a frivolous teen.” He’d had so many opportunities stolen from him. She could do this one thing for him, even if it was just the two of them in her living room.
“I’m not dressed up.” He glanced at himself. “I’m barely clothed, in fact.”
“And thank you for that.”
He smiled as if unable to help himself and ran a hand down his face. Shook his head. Looked at her gown again. A furrow grew between his brows. “So, that’s the dress your date tried to...?” He growled.
Lord. She held up her hands. “Do remember I kneed him in the balls and Nakos broke his nose.” She waved at herself. “Note I’m standing before you in one piece, unharmed.”
His eyes narrowed.
“Dance with me. At the very least, you can give me a better memory than when I last wore this.”
A glance heavenward, and he walked over to stand in front of her. “You don’t play fair, baby. Fine. What now?”
Taking his hands, she placed them around her waist. “High school dances are elementary. We really just have to sway back and forth.” She wove her arms around his neck and brought them flush together. Grinning, she looked up at him. “See?”
He grunted. “I see you have no shoes on and I’ll probably break your toes.”
“Your optimism is staggering.” He was adorable all pouty-like. She took a small step to the right, and when he followed suit, she did the same to her left. After a few beats, he relaxed. “Not so bad?”
“If you were my date back then, I might not have minded doing this. The monkey suit, though? No thanks.” His hands skimmed up her back and he drew her closer as the song ended. It started again since she’d put it on repeat. He glanced down his nose at her. “Any particular reason you chose this song?”
“Caught on to that, did you?” The lyrics were about starting over after finding a special person who gave proper motivation to want to be better. “I dub this our song.”
“Our song?” Up went his brows. He glanced away as if listening, then huffed a laugh. “Okay, baby.” His throat worked a swallow. “Does this make you my girlfriend or something?”
She rose on her toes and whispered, “I think I have been for a while.” At his blank stare, she grew confused. “What term would you use for what we are together?”
He shook his head. “This is your world, Olivia. Your home, your family, your friends. I don’t have the foggiest idea what the hell is going on. I just follow you. You’re the only person in my world.”
Shocked, she paused. If that wasn’t the sweetest, most misguided thing she’d ever heard, she’d climb the Laramie naked. “First, just because this started as my world, doesn’t mean you’re not a part of it. These people? They like you. A lot. Family doesn’t always mean blood and they are your friends, too, not just mine.”
She took his face in her hands, his stubble rough on her palms. “And that thing they say about one special person in your life? It’s a myth. Family, friends, romantic love...it’s all precious. Humans, as a species, weren’t meant to have just one person. And if they’re lucky, if the gods are smiling, they don’t.”
Studying him, her heart grew heavy. Lord, she wished he’d met Justin sooner. “Luck may not have been on your side, but it is now. You’re here, in a new world. Shed the old one and let go. There are people everywhere around you who care.”
His fingers twitched on her back. The longer he stared, the more shallow his breathing became until she swore he quit altogether. For a moment, she got a picture of the scared little boy he used to be, hidden beneath the man who still held onto those fears as if they were all he deserved. Clear as day, he was trying, wanting to grab hold of what she offered with both hands. Yet the censure in his soulful eyes said he couldn’t quite bring himself to believe.
And she fell in love with him right there in her living room in her bare feet and an old prom dress. She’d laugh if she didn’t feel like crying.
Love. She’d been surrounded by it in one form or another her whole life. But not like this. Not in a tragically consuming, she-couldn’t-catch-her-breath kind of way. Yet, she loved him. The desperate, lonely boy. The rogue turned soldier. The man whose heart still beat despite life’s attempts to crush it. A hero. His defiance, his charm, his utter selflessness in the face of tragedy...
He wasn’t just it for her. He was everything she dared not wish for herself.
Truthfully, she’d been no wiser than him. In the wake of her parents’ deaths, she’d clung to those she had left and built her world around them. He’d been right before when he’d claimed she didn’t seek anything for herself. And perhaps that had been a good thing, else she might not have recognized the real deal when he rode in on a Harley with a cargo of baggage and a If You’re Reading This letter.
This wrecked, beautifully built man had awoken her, and she hadn’t even known she’d been asleep.
Carefully, he gripped her wrists and moved her hands from his face to the back of his neck once more. Then, with a swallow working his throat, he brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. His quiet sigh went right through her, but his tender gaze wrapped her inside him.
One corner of his mouth curled like he wanted to smile, but couldn’t commit. “So, was that a yes to the girlfriend question?”
Damn him. She dropped her forehead to his chest and breathed a laugh. Just...damn him. “Yes, Nate.” She lifted her face and smiled. “That was a yes.”
He grunted and shoved his hand in her hair, holding the back of her head and encouraging her to rest her cheek on his pec. The other arm banded around her back as he started to sway again. She reveled in his warm embrace and the safety there, breathing in his scent.
After a moment, he dropped his chin on top of her head. “Aren’t couples supposed to go out? Not that I have a shred of experience in this area, but shouldn’t I be taking you on a date or something?”
Pressing her lips together, she smiled against his skin. Lord, he was adorable. “If you want. Why don’t we do something you’re comfortable with?”
His hand skimmed up and down her spine. “How about a ride on the Hog tomorrow if the weather holds?”
She grinned up at him. “Heck yeah. I’ve never been on a motorcycle.”
“Well, what do you know?” He dipped her and held her suspended over his arm. Pinning her with an amused glare, he smirked. “Something I can teach you for a change.”
She grabbed his shoulders and laughed. “I thought you couldn’t dance.”
“I’m faking it.” A grin split his face and, had he not been holding her, she would’ve melted into a puddle. “Tell no one.”
“Your secret is safe with me.”
He brought her upright again and she wrapped her arms around his waist to grab his shoulders from behind. She buried her face in his neck and contentedly hummed when he held her close.
“Question.” He smoothed her hair. “Why do you do that? Press your face against me?”
“Because you’re warm and you smell good and I like being close to you.” She blinked, concerned. “Does it bother you?”
“No. I like it.” He dipped his head and brushed his nose against her cheek. “Just curious. You do it a lot.”
“It also gets me in target range to do this.” She licked his pulse, teasing him with the tip of her tongue, knowing it drove him mad every time.
He inhaled, fingers clenching her strands. “Pretty sure you’re not supposed to get this feisty at prom.”
“Good thing no one else is here.” Nuzzling his neck, she lightly scratched her way down his sculpted chest, past the rivets of rock-hard abs, and cupped his length through his jeans. He made a choking sound and she grinned. “Since I’m never going to wear this dress again, how about you tear it off me and take me to bed?”
Without hesitation, he did exactly that.