SEVENTEEN

 

 

Diego must have heard the door open. His lieutenant turned away from the light of the window on the opposite wall, probably to check who’d come in. No doubt, Diego was expecting to see the doctor or Shea.

Raid strode into the room. “Heard we had a coup.”

The surprise on his second’s expression wasn’t comfortable. “Boss—”

“Where is she?”

“I don’t know,” Diego said, trying to sit up. “If she’s heard you’re back, I’d guess she’s on her way here. I got—”

“Banged up, yeah, I know,” Raid said, marching toward the bed. “The guys on the gate couldn’t look me in the eye. It didn’t take me long to find out we’ve got a new master. How the fuck—”

“I was unconscious,” Diego said by way of explanation. “Boss, she stepped up, for both of us. Kipling crapped out and Shea stepped up. She shot four inmates; damn near killed one of them. She put everyone on lockdown, ordered every man on shift, set priorities, followed every fucking procedure to the letter, better than I fucking would have.”

Details on what had gone down were sketchy. Anarchy hadn’t triumphed yet, that much was clear. To hear Shea had picked up a weapon was unexpected. “She shot four inmates?”

There was a pride shimmering about the still wary Diego. Raid was still trying to figure this whole situation out. “Three are back on the block. One’s in another room up here,” he said. “From what I heard, she was incredible. There was a moment when we were losing it. The inmates could’ve had it. But, Shea, she came from nowhere, floored the perps and took control.”

“We need to find out who’s responsible. We need to—”

“She already did that. She has them in solitary awaiting our word on punishment… your word. And, she’s identified the key power players on each block. Kipling says she’s got a novel of a fucking report that she updates every minute she does something… She’s logged every detail and is willing to be held accountable for her decisions… And, she’s on my ass about my recovery. Our girl hasn’t missed a trick, not one thing… I’d be scared to think what would’ve happened if she hadn’t been here.”

Raid couldn’t believe what he was hearing. The woman had saved the day? Since when could she shoot? Diego might have taken notice of this girl because she looked like Mia, but he’d been right about her steel too. That Shea was impressive was no revelation, though he hadn’t expected her to have the courage to run his compound.

Business would always be his priority, but he had to take note of his lieutenant’s surroundings. “Doc says you’re going to make it.”

“Seems like it,” Diego said, loosening his muscles to rest against his pillows. “I fucking hate being in this bed. Pest has got me on this diet too, it’s a fucking nightmare.”

Raid scanned his friend, laid up in the bed. “Maybe she learned something from me after all.” They made eye contact. “I’m glad you’re going to be okay, D.”

His lieutenant nodded. At the same time, a feminine cough came from the doorway, making them both turn.

 

 

There they were, Laird and Lieutenant.

Shea ignored her nerves and started forward, keeping her focus on her friend in the bed. “Doc showed me your report. I was sure it had to be wrong. I said to him, no way was Diego breaking the rules, it had to be some kind of misunderstanding,” she said, going over to hand him a single sheet of paper. “I’ve been kind enough to print off your approved foods list… again. Aren’t I a great friend?”

Rolling her eyes at the contrite Diego, she acted angrier than she really was. With Raid back on the compound, she wouldn’t have the power to discipline the men for sneaking Diego food anymore. But, without the responsibility of running the place, the time she’d have to spend policing her friend’s infirmary room would skyrocket. That would be a lot more fun for her than it would be for Diego.

Her other arm was supporting the heavy load of papers and files that she’d picked up at the office when she heard Raid was back on the premises. She hadn’t seen him since the morning she’d stormed out of his place in his shirt, but this wasn’t the place, or the time, to talk about that.

“This,” she said, bending to shift the weight of the stack. Turning around and hefting it up, she dumped all of it into Raid’s arms. “Is yours.” His focus fell to the heap while Shea flipped the top sheet. “I have printed a quick reference guide. A cheat sheet. I’d prioritize seeing the guards who were injured. They went above and beyond, as you can see.” She glanced at Diego and then moved the top page aside to open the first folder. “I’ve written a full report on the incident. I’ve enclosed the witness statements and the video footage is included too. Draw your own conclusions, don’t take my interpretation as gospel. The perpetrators I’ve identified are awaiting your word. Forgiveness or… not.” Her gaze bounced to his. “I’d go with not and that’s got nothing to do with how hot I’ll find it when you whale on a man who truly deserves it.” Diego laughed, making her spin on him. “Something to say?”

“No, Lady, you got it.”

“Lady?” Raid asked, his brows rising.

Diego shrugged. “It’s what the men call her now… in front of her face anyway.”

“Oh, haha,” she said, folding her arms. “I still have some sway with the doc. You like how those pain meds are working out for you?” His smile dropped. “Yeah, try physio without them.”

“You’re mean now,” Diego said to her. “When did that happen?”

“Oh, I don’t know somewhere between him telling me I was last week’s news,” she said, bobbing her head backward in Raid’s direction. “And seeing you flat out on the yard.”

“You became a badass in that time?”

Bowing to get closer, Shea laid a hand on his shoulder. “Sweetie, I’ve always been a badass.” She took a deep cleansing breath. “My work is done. I have off-loaded all of my responsibilities, so I am going to eat dinner with the guys.”

Without letting herself look at Raid again, she turned away from him in her pursuit of the exit. Although every new day had come with the hope that the Laird would return, she hadn’t really considered what she’d do when he did. Being in charge had its perks, but she didn’t enjoy the responsibility of having all the men looking to her for leadership.

Deciding she was more of a reader than a leader, she wished she had a bathtub and a good book to escape into. Unfortunately, there wasn’t much fiction that tickled her around and the only bathtub she’d ever seen was in Raid’s bathroom. As far as she was concerned, she’d never need to set foot in that building ever again.

Leaving Diego’s room, she made her way through the infirmary and was about ten feet down the corridor with the double doors behind her when she heard them open. She didn’t think much of it until Raid’s voice echoed down the corridor at her back.

“Shea!”

Turning around, she kept walking backward. “What did you do with the files?” she asked, though he’d probably left them with Diego. Smiling, she held up both hands. “Sorry. Not my department anymore.”

About facing to continue her journey toward the mess, the last thing she expected was his hand on her arm, pulling her back. “She…”

Wonder and gratitude bled from his gaze, seeping down into her. Shea held herself rigid. “I didn’t do it for you,” she whispered, thinking he might have gotten the wrong idea about why she’d taken control like she had.

“You did it for Diego.”

She nodded once. “And because this place, love it or hate it, is my home. You left here trusting that the rest of us would stop the walls from caving in. That’s all I did.” When his gaze dropped to her mouth, she breathed in and pressed a hand to his chest. Putting space between them before he could do something stupid, this was the time to say what had to be said. “You were right. What we did wasn’t fair to your ‘out there’ her. Carrying on wouldn’t be fair to me either… I can’t work under you and be your dirty little secret at the same time. I don’t know how to feel for a man the way I feel for you without being with you all the way and we can’t be together all the way while you’re embarrassed to claim me in front of the men.” Touching his jaw, she smiled and blew out a breath. “Shit, I feel better for saying that out loud. Thank you for letting me.”

It was just as possible that he hadn’t been thinking about their fling at all. With Raid there was always the possibility of him being mad and considering punishment. Yet, he’d stood there just letting her say what she had to say.

Coming out of her funk and being forced into action had given her time to put things in perspective. Being honest and mature was a far better way to deal with things than the way she’d reacted on his balcony when he’d ended their involvement.

Feeling lighter and freer than she had in a long time, Shea left him in the corridor with a bounce in her step like a weight had been lifted. Shea was proud of what she’d accomplished. Sure, she only ran the compound for five days, but it was proof that she had the capacity.

Striding into the mess, she didn’t dwell on what was and let her thoughts move onto what might be on the menu and what other unexpected feats she might achieve in her life.

Someone grabbed her upper arm and yanked her around.

She had no idea who might be holding her with such a determined grip in this public place. Anyone who wasn’t on shift ate at this time. There had to be sixty guys in the room, maybe more, and they’d all know better than to manhandle her. Diego might be down, but he wasn’t out, and he’d hear about anyone disrespecting her. Something no man would get away with doing twice if her friend had any say on the issue.

But, it wasn’t a random comrade. There was no emergency, no one was panicked or afraid or trying to hurt her.

The man detaining her was the same one who’d gotten hold of her in the corridor.

“Raid,” she said when he yanked her to him. “What are you doing?”

“There is no her ‘out there’,” he murmured, grabbing the back of her head to pull her up to the tips of her toes so he could plant his mouth over hers.

Shea was still in such deep shock that she forgot for at least twenty seconds that she was supposed to participate in a kiss as devouring as this one. This was Raid… Raid. Her Laird. Her lips loosened. This was Raid, kissing her in front of his men, in the mess at chow time.

Just the trust it showed was enough to make her hands relax to open on his chest. The whimper in her throat became almost a growl when she pushed up higher, harder, begging for more from the mouth of the man she’d thought was embarrassed to acknowledge her.

“Raid,” she whispered when his lips edged away from hers.

Blinking the daze from her eyes, Shea was amazed to see that his absolute focus didn’t show even the slightest hint of embarrassment.

“Consider yourself claimed,” he said, locking an arm against the small of her back to tug her against him. Grinning, she hid her smile against his chest. “Aren’t you supposed to be eating?”

From the angle of his voice, she figured out that he wasn’t talking to her. Peeking over her shoulder, she saw that everyone in the room was fixated on them. “We’re putting on a live show, baby,” she murmured.

“Won’t be the last time,” he said, growling at any man who was standing too close.

“Relax,” she said, stroking his chest when his glare zoned in on Lev. “That’s Lev, he’s been helping me out. We like Lev.”

Lev blinked at her and then his eyes widened on Raid. “Nice to have you back, boss… Not that your lady wasn’t amazing… she was, but… we’re happy you’re back.”

“Not as happy as I am,” she said and nodded Lev back to the chow line while the rest of the room tried to be more discreet about their gawping. “Are we eating here?” Raid took her hand and pulled her toward the door. “Guess that’s a no.”

She steadied herself by laying a hand on his back. Letting him lead her through the corridors and stairways, they eventually got to his place. He took her up the stairs and over to the bed. When he pushed her onto it, he didn’t join her, he left her sitting there at the end alone.

“Take your shit off,” he said, going over to the computer near the window.

“Take your shit off,” she mumbled. “That’s romantic.” Bending over, she removed her shoes and pulled her top over her head before standing up to shirk her jeans. He didn’t even glance her way once while she stripped, his frown stayed fixed on the screen. He entered a bunch of codes, and opened programs she didn’t recognize. “Are you checking up on me?”

“Something like that,” he muttered, reading something on the monitor.

“We can’t have sex until you check I didn’t accidently alert the FBI to our whereabouts?”

With her clothes in a less than neat pile on the floor, she lay down. But, she didn’t want to fall asleep like she had last time, so she got up to go and join him… with ideas of perhaps tempting him into action.

Squeezing his shoulders, she let her hands slide down his chest as she bent over. “Did you have sex out there in the real world?” she asked, kissing his ear and then tonguing the lobe into her mouth. Her hands skimmed lower and she started to unfasten his pants. “Did you?”

He’d said there wasn’t an ‘out there’ woman, but that didn’t mean he hadn’t found a willing woman who’d do him in a minute. Knowing what was in the real world and what she had here, Shea was aware of just how many women would throw themselves at her appealing Laird.

Flicking off the monitor, he grabbed her arms to lift them away as he turned his swivel chair towards her. “I didn’t come back here expecting this,” he said. “I didn’t think this was an avenue still on the table.”

That sounded like a preface to an apology or an excuse. She sank to her knees between his feet and pushed her hands up the front of his thighs. “Is that a yes, sir?”

Shea slipped her hand into his pants; he took her wrist and pulled it back out. “No,” he said and undid a couple of buttons on his shirt to then grab it at the back of his neck to remove it.

That could’ve been a no either in answer to her question or her actions. Grabbing her upper arms, her Laird stood up, pulling her onto her feet too.

He didn’t follow up his word with an explanation. Instead, he began to walk forward, backing her toward the bed. “Raid?” she asked. His eyes grew narrower and more intense by the second. “What are you doing?”

“You’ve got some credit to spend, Poppet,” he said, picking her up and throwing her to the middle of the bed.

The air rushed from her lungs, making her squeak when she landed. There was no time to orient herself. Raid came down onto the bed between her thighs, pulling them apart to give his broad shoulders space, then he hooked her legs over them and rolled his tongue around her clit.

An instant barb of pleasure shot up through her; she said his name as her body bucked. It had been a while since she’d had an orgasm. Though she couldn’t say she’d never had one in the Laird’s home. After pleasuring him in the past, when she’d been in the shower, she may have been guilty of enjoying herself. But, she sure hadn’t reached climax under the tongue of a man in a long time.

Raid was skilled in the way he licked and teased her. His shoulders and scalp would be covered in scratches tomorrow, but she couldn’t bring herself to stop clawing and begging. It was a good thing they were in a detached building. Her volume would’ve been a problem anywhere else. None of that slowed Raid down. He sped forth, bringing her to the brink of orgasm before slowing his pace and teasing her with a warm awakening that built again.

A tear slid from the corner of Shea’s eye as his talented tongue pushed her into the heavy abyss of an orgasm he’d been building for longer than she’d realized. She needed this release, needed his permission to feel this level of acceptance from the man she’d craved and feared lost.

She was still panting when he rose and lay over her, touching his lips onto hers. “Still with me?” he asked.

Panting out a smile, she dropped her hand to her forehead and managed a lazy smile. “Always,” she said, looping her arms around him. “Raid, I—”

“Shh,” he said and kissed her. “No talking, babe. My balls are ready to burst.”

Pushing up in an arch, she couldn’t subdue the laugh that exploded from her chest. She’d never heard him say anything close to that crass. This new more relaxed side to him only showed her how their intimacy was growing.

Sliding her hands down his shoulders, she smoldered. “Want to lay back and I’ll—”

“No, I want to fuck you,” he said, hooking his arm under her knee to pull it up toward her chest.

She shivered. “It’s about time… I want you so bad.”

“So bad, huh?”

Pulling her knee higher, he pushed the other leg out of his way and his hips rose. “So bad,” she pouted, aroused by the joining of their eyes that were managing to tease each other and bond at the same time. “So, so bad.”

Opening her hands on his chest, she stroked up to his shoulders and down. As she whimpered and angled her hips, he surged forward and plunged into her. Shea screamed, a good scream, and in her recovery from the surprise, she wriggled, trying to get closer.

Raid puffed out a breath and began to retreat. “Fuck, She,” he hissed and froze. “Sit fucking still a minute.”

She was meant to follow all of his orders. Except, as she lay there beneath him with the head of his dick enveloped inside of her, she couldn’t help but tease him a little. Moving her hips slowly, she grinned when his glare snapped onto her.

“You feel too good,” she said, tipping her hips up and down. “Fuck me, boss. Please, fuck me.”

Bowing to kiss her, he used his body weight to pin her down. “Never thought that phrase would turn me on.”

He was funny; being in bed made him funny. Shea would never have guessed that he’d relax like this. Maybe giving in to his own feelings had freed up some of that guilt. No previous Laird had ever had a woman on the compound, which meant everywhere there was virgin to him. Everywhere would be a first for him, for her, for them together. She was lost in this thought when he started to kiss her again.

After a minute, his hips rose and he pushed deeper into her. It took him a few more thrusts to get home and when they were finally fully joined, she threw her legs around him and clamped her muscles tight around his thighs.

“Babe,” he said and tried to pry her thighs from around him.

Shea shook her head. “This might be the only chance I have to feel you like this,” she said, curling her fingers around his shoulders. “Let me feel you.”

“You don’t understand what you did,” he said. “You don’t understand what I owe you.”

Gratitude was one thing. But to have it expressed while they were in bed together, while he was inside her, brought her up short. Her legs loosened. Raid didn’t notice the frown that flitted across her face as he started to thrust into her again.

When his mouth descended to hers and his tongue slipped between her lips, Shea couldn’t stop her body from reacting, and her concern dwindled. This powerful man was inside her, pleasuring her, belonging to her in this minute, and she couldn’t resist the allure of what that meant to her heart.

Desire drove her to buck up in surrender to an orgasm. Tearing her mouth from his to call out for him, she dug her nails into his shoulders again in sync with his groan. His hips shoved forward, pushing hard to pour himself into her before his body went slack over hers.

As soon as he moved away, his sentiment returned to her memory. Shea sat up and ran a hand down the back of her head, feeling the knots in her hair, though she didn’t care about the mess. Scooting to the edge of the bed, she bent over the end to find her underwear.

“You think we’re done?” he asked from behind her.

“I think someone has to supervise lights out,” she said, lying on her back to lift her hips so she could wriggle into her panties.

“I’ll make a phone call,” he said, his fingertips just meeting the top of her head for a second before she sat up to put on her bra. “Babe?”

Flipping around onto her knees, she didn’t even realize her rage was so potent until it burst out of her. “You don’t owe me a goddamn thing! If you want to fuck me, fuck me. Don’t do it because you think you have a debt to settle!”

He blinked twice. “Okay,” he said. “I’m sorry.”

Her mouth clamped shut; she hadn’t expected such an instant retraction. Her gusto left her. “You’re what?”

Raid opened his hand. “I’m sorry. I didn’t fuck you ‘cause I owed you. I didn’t mean it to come out that way.”

Loosening her neck, her head tilted to the side. “Then why did you fuck me?”

“Because I wanted to,” he said, resting the back of his hand over his eyes, leaving his body right there on show for her and it was a helluva show.

Her gaze danced over the lines of his defined form. “Why tonight and not before?”

“Didn’t know I could trust you before.”

That was something of a distraction, and left her with more questions. “And now you trust me?”

Shifting his hand away from his eyes, he lifted his head. “Want me to take it back? I can’t unfuck you, Shea. It’s done.”

He was scowling when he got off the bed; it was sort of reassuring to see him in a mood. Him being relaxed unnerved her a little. The more open side of him, the more relaxed Raid, he was a Raid who might let her love him. That was one can of worms she might be too weak to close up again if this got out of hand.

Her concern for her heart became concern for him when she realized he was getting dressed. “Where are you going?” she asked.

“Like you said, someone has to supervise lights out. And it turns out, I’ve got a lot of paperwork to review and punishments to issue.”

Not only did it seem they were done, but she’d managed to provoke him into abandoning her and that was the last thing that she’d wanted.

“Raid,” she said, shifting toward the end of the bed.

He held out a hand. “Stay,” he said, making her scowl at him. Shea wasn’t his pet. She’d take orders at work. At home, she didn’t want to be barked at in single syllables. Apologetic Raid had checked out for the night, or maybe forever. “It’s incredible that you’ve gotten this far without realizing I’m not a patient man.”

“I do realize that.”

“Good, then you’ll know I like being questioned even less,” he said, grabbing a sweatshirt from the closet. “Getting up and walking out the door, away from this, away from you, is the best way for me to deal with my anger. You make me angry, I walk away. It’s best for both of us.”

“Talking to me would be another way of dealing with it.”

He slammed the closet door; the thread of his patience was fraying. “That’s not what Diego told me when I found out you’d stormed through C-Hall wearing nothing except my shirt.”

“You kissed me in the mess. I think the compound knows we’re a thing now. Your shirt will be forgotten.”

“That’s not why I was angry,” he said and pulled the sweatshirt over his head. “I’d have locked you up myself if you hadn’t done it for me. I’ve never been so angry!” The moment he raised his voice, he clenched his teeth and balled his hands at his sides. “I’ve got to go out.”

Spinning around, he started to walk away.

“Raid!” She hated seeing him angry and didn’t want to provoke him. Maybe he was right about the walking away thing. “Please! One thing!” Without looking at her, he stopped on the top stair. “Promise me when you have to walk away from me, promise me you’ll only go inside, don’t ever go out into the forest mad.”

Though his expression was curious when he tipped his head toward her, he didn’t question her and nodded once. “There’s food in the kitchen, feed yourself, shower, sleep. Do not leave this house.”

Because if he was mad at her, the last thing he’d want to do was come across her in the hallways. “Yes, sir.”

Disappearing without another word, he went down the stairs. The front door opened and closed signaling his departure. She lay back down in their sheets.

Raid was a conundrum of a man. He’d kissed her in front of dozens of his men, proving he wasn’t ashamed of wanting her. They’d had sex, showing that he desired her. He’d ordered her to stay, demonstrating that he might want a repeat performance.

Except, he’d made no declaration of feelings or promises of a future. Shea might be no clearer on what they were to each other, but she was surer of what they weren’t and that was a step in the right direction.