Chapter 2: Gareth
I stared at the dressing room wall trying to make sense of everything that had taken place at the concert. I was still a little shaken by the whole thing, but my adrenaline rush was finally subsiding.
My guitar was toast. As soon as the first flash went off in front of me, I’d lifted it to shield my eyes. It ended up saving my face. We had one more concert to go before we took a few weeks off and I really needed that break right about now. I wouldn’t admit it aloud, but I was never so happy to have Iron Man watching out for me. I glanced over my shoulder to see the man in question on the phone — shouting.
Day-umm. I’ve never seen a man that fucking big in my life! Not even the bouncers come close to Mr. Blaze’s mass. He has to be at least six-foot-five and he’s a walking wall of muscle. He has some pretty damned interesting tattoos, too. Dark hair cropped close and the coldest gray eyes I’ve ever seen were eyeing me as he spoke on the phone. I felt naked, as if he could see through me to my soul. And fuck if he wasn’t hotter than Hades. I licked my lips looking at his package. He had to be big; his bulge said so. Why was I drooling over my bodyguard? That had to be a no-no. Besides, he probably wasn’t even gay.
Fuck my life.
I tapped my fingers on my thighs as I waited for Mr. Blaze to tell me when we could leave. Mr. Blaze, really? I almost snorted but thought better of it. I really can’t say shit about his name; my real name is Gareth, but Ransom and I changed our last names so that any family can’t find us or track us down. Especially our father. I shivered at the thought and closed my eyes.
“Are you cold?”
I opened them and Mr. Blaze was standing right in front of me.
“Um, no. Is everything cool?”
“Yeah. Come with me.”
I was ushered out of the room while my big, huge bodyguard walked in front of me. We made it to the parking garage without any fanfare and then I was slipping into the limo. I looked around for Ransom, but didn’t see him.
“Where are the rest of the guys?”
“Different limos.”
“Limos? Plural?”
“Yes. Best way to cause confusion. Don’t worry; you’ll see your brother at the hotel.”
My head whipped around and I stared open-mouthed. “How do you know he’s my brother? No one but the band knows that!”
“I do.” Mr. Blaze sat forward, clasping his hands. “I have to know everything. Why do you guys keep it a secret?”
“Long story.” I looked out the window.
“Is it because of your father?”
“Jesus!” I threw my hands in the air in frustration. “Do you know my dick size, too?”
“Nope.”
My eyes widened as the huge man smiling wickedly at me gave me a wink. I swallowed hard and curled up in my seat. Not that this guy wasn’t my type. I loved them manly and bigger than me. But fuck, this guy could crush me.
“Do you know how to use a gun?”
I looked up. “What?”
“If not, I’ll have to train you.”
“Why would I need one?”
“I’m your last line of defense, Gareth. If something happens to me, you’ll have to protect yourself.”
“What do you mean if something happens to you? Aren’t you supposed to be bulletproof or something?”
“As nice as that would be, no, I’m not. If anything happens to me, you’ll have to know some basic moves.”
“Okay.” I grinned. I did know some basic moves and I couldn’t wait to see the look on colossal man’s face when I used them.
We pulled up to the hotel and the limo pulled to the service entrance. Mr. Blaze got out first and surveyed the area before coming back for me. I exited the limo and walked beside him as we entered the hotel kitchen. Once we passed the dining area, we boarded the elevator.
We got to the top floor and I again walked behind Mr. Blaze. A bellhop was waiting, and he swiped the keycard. I waited right inside the doorway while my bodyguard did a sweep of the room. When he came back, he tipped the bellhop and allowed me into the suite.
“I’m surprised you didn’t frisk the bellhop.”
“Didn’t have to. I asked Mac to do a background check on everyone who works here.”
The living room was spacious, with two chairs and a large couch. Double doors hid what I was sure was a king-sized bed and bathroom. A kitchen off to the right featured a stainless steel refrigerator and stove. Leave it to Paul to set us up in another ritzier than hell hotel.
“Well, I suppose this will have to do.” Mr. Blaze raised a brow at our accommodations.
“I don’t know why Paul feels the need to put us up in places like this. Ransom and I have been in some pretty raunchy hotels.”
“Maybe he feels you’d like this sort of place.”
“Pfft. I just want to go home, Mr. Blaze.”
“How about you call me Axel?”
“Really? Axel Blaze?”
“It is what it is. My dad had a great sense of humor.”
“Had, huh?”
“Yes, he died.” Axel got comfortable on the couch.
There was a short rap on the door and Axel shot up and crossed the room. He peeked through the peephole, opened the door an inch and then opened it the rest of the way.
“Damn, Gareth!” Ransom rushed in, grabbing me and hugging me tightly.
“Can’t…breathe,” I wheezed.
“Damn! I was scared to death out there!” He turned to Axel and pinned him with a warning look. “Don’t you ever take Gareth again without warning me first!”
“I’ll do what I have to do to keep him alive, Mr. Fox.”
Ransom started to say something but I cut him off.
“Why don’t you get some rest? We can talk on the plane.”
“Yeah, okay.” Ransom ran a hand through his hair.
I shut the door behind my brother and locked it. Axel grinned and went back to the couch, settling on it comfortably.
“So what can you tell me that the files can’t?” he asked.
“Such as?”
“Well, I know there was an accident which is why Paul’s right hand is messed up. He used to be the lead guitarist and now you are. You guys grew up together?”
I sat down on the chair across from Axel.
“Yeah, I was quite a few years behind Ransom but I was always around.”
“The annoying younger sibling?” Axel grinned.
“Something like that. Ransom never treated me that way, though. He always felt like he needed to protect me. Jinx, Harley, Paul and Rebel all went to school with him and they always switched whose garage they’d practice in after school. Ransom would always get me from school and I’d sit in and toy around with Paul’s extra guitar.” I shrugged. “I guess I learned how to use it naturally.”
“So, no lessons?”
“Nope. Just picked it up from watching the guys.”
“That’s pretty damned impressive.”
“I guess. When Paul hurt himself, Ransom turned to me right away. I guess I just fell into it. Our first concert I was nervous as fuck because I was taking over for Paul and I didn’t know how well I would be received.”
“But it went really well, right?”
“Yeah. After that we were always sold out.”
“You weren’t before?”
“No, not really. The band did well, don’t get me wrong, but now we’re packed instantly.”
“Is there anyone on staff who makes you nervous?”
I thought about that one. The only guy who made me uneasy was Paul’s right hand man, Stan. He always looked at me funny, like I was some reject.
“I get weirded out around Stan. I think he’s homophobic.”
“Stan Jackson. Paul’s assistant? What makes you think he’s a homophobe?”
“Just the way he looks at me, like he’s praying for my soul.” I chuckled.
“Has he ever said anything around you?”
“No, but I’ve heard him on the phone talking about the ‘fag.’ I’m going to assume that’s me.”
“What made you decide to come out?”
“Are you kidding me?” I snorted. “After each and every show there’s some strung-out chick that wants to suck my dick or fuck me. I got tired of fucking just to save an image that didn’t even represent me.”
Axel eyed me skeptically.
“What?”
“You’re nothing like I thought you’d be.”
“Is that a good thing?”
“I expected a spoiled rotten, full-of-himself guitarist.”
“Yeah, well, Ransom and I have seen hard times and we’re really grounded, as are the rest of the guys. I love being able to buy a nice car and live in a mansion, but I don’t have either. I bought a Jeep because I always wanted one as a kid. And I own two houses. I sold the first one after the incident and then bought another one. Then I had one built special. Let’s say it’s a bit unconventional.”
“Meaning?”
“It has to be seen to be believed.”
“I’ll take your word for it. In the file it says you all live in Arizona.”
“Yep.”
“Why stay there? You grew up there.”
“Because it’s home, no matter what shit we went through. I love the heat and the rain.” Axel snorted and I lifted a brow. “What?”
“I hate rain.”
“Well this is ‘special rain’.” I lifted my fingers to indicate air quotes.
“Yes, I’ve seen the special rain.”
“Turn around, don’t drown.” I laughed softly.
“Well, we’ll have plenty of time to talk on the plane tomorrow. You should get some rest.”
I glanced at the clock and realized it was after one in the morning. We had another concert the following night in Vegas and then it was on to Glendale, Arizona. I couldn’t wait to get back home. I yawned and stretched out my arms.
“Okay. 6 a.m. wake up call sound good?”
“I’ll be awake at five.”
“Ouch.” I got up from the chair. “Is that a military thing?”
“It’s a survival thing.”
“Goodnight, Mr. Survival.”
I woke up covered in sweat. My hands were tingling and my body was shaking so hard the bed was moving. The door to the room flung open and a huge shadow blocked out the light from the living room.
“Gareth?”
“Yeah.” I rubbed my arms and closed my eyes, wishing my nightmare away.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah, just a nightmare.”
“You have them a lot?”
“I guess. Did I wake you up?”
“The screaming did, yeah.”
“I was screaming?”
Axel sat on the edge of the bed and I pulled the sheet up around me.
“Yes, you were screaming for someone to ‘watch out’.”
I groaned and fell back against the pillows. In one way or another, I was still in that stupid car — could still hear the sound of glass breaking, metal tearing apart and screaming. I could still feel the blood soaking my shirt — the smell of it overpowered everything.
“Gareth?”
“Yeah?”
“Are you okay now?”
“I think so.”
“Have you seen someone for it?”
“For what?”
“Your nightmares. If you don’t get a hold of that shit, it’ll fuck you all up.”
“I take it you have firsthand knowledge?”
“Yeah, I do. I wasn’t too proud to see a shrink. The shit I’ve seen would make you puke.”
“I’ll take your word for it. What time is it?”
“Time for you to get up.”
“Ugh.” I rolled to my side and thrust a pillow over my head.
“Five minutes!”
My door closed and I sat up in bed. I should have taken the sleeping pills Paul had given me. Maybe then, I’d get a good night’s sleep.
~*~
Vegas wore me out. We did a two-hour show and my fingers went numb after the first hour. One of our number one hits had a riff that tore me up every time. Axel stood just off stage and his mere presence relaxed me. I don’t know why; he’s scary as fuck.
I chuckled as I rinsed my hair under the warm water. This hotel suite was also ritzy as fuck. I was tired and sore and just wanted a bed.
I walked out into the kitchen area and found Axel standing over the stove.
“What are you doing?”
“It’s called cooking. I hate eating out at restaurants all the time so I’m making us some chicken.”
“Chicken?”
“Oh God, don’t tell me you’re a vegan or a vegetarian.”
“Fuck, no. I love meat.”
Axel chuckled and I knew my cheeks were instantly red. I was with this man twenty-four hours a day and drooling over him for half of that. Okay, more than half. Who wouldn’t, though? He was sexy.
“Do you need any help?” I asked.
“Nope, just about done. Have a seat.”
I sat down and eyed Axel’s ass in sweatpants. It was perfect, rounded and perky. Totally biteable.
“Here ya go.” Axel set a plate in front of me.
I stared down at my plate of chicken with broccoli in some sort of sauce. Axel went to get his own plate and brought two glasses of water with him. He sat down across from me and picked up his fork.
“Do you plan to try it?” He stared at my plate.
“Yes, Lurch.” I snickered as Axel raised a brow at me. “What’s the sauce?” I poked at my chicken.
“Just try it.”
I stabbed a piece of chicken and stuffed it into my mouth. The flavor swept over my taste buds and I groaned. It was tender and delicious.
“That good, eh?”
I opened my eyes and found Axel watching me. I didn’t even realize I had closed my eyes. I coughed quietly and sipped my water.
“Delicious.”
“So, tomorrow it’s Phoenix.”
“Yeah.” I nodded. “I want to go to the unconventional house.”
“I’ll be going with you.”
“I know. It has a guest room.”
“Where is it?”
“In Flagstaff.” Axel seemed to choke on his food and he coughed. I handed him a napkin and eyed him. “What?”
“Nothing.”
“You should cook more often.” I smiled, taking a bite of broccoli.
“If you’re a good little boy, I will.”
I frowned at him.
“What? Fair is fair. You love calling me all kinds of names.”
“Okay, Stretch,” I pointed at Axel with my fork. “But don’t think I won’t come up with new ones for you.”
“I can’t wait,” Axel drawled.
I laughed.
~*~
I stared out the window of the plane as it descended into Phoenix. I have never been so happy to be home, although I love touring. There are some places I always wanted to go to as a kid, but could never afford. Now we’re staying in five-star hotels and eating at five-star restaurants. But I always look forward to being back home.
Amazing how things can change in just a few short years.
When the band first got a contract, I went along for the ride as a roadie. Hell, I had nothing better to do and had no plans to attend college. Music was my life and I didn’t plan to do anything else. I loved my job even then, setting up the equipment and making sure everything was ready to go for the guys. Music calms me, centers me in a way, and when I was younger, it was my escape. Music often drowned out the screaming and yelling between my parents. But playing? That brought me to a completely new level. I loved the sound of the crowd, the vibrations of the music stroking along my body.
Even though I was out front every night with people screaming at me, I was still unbelievably shy. Don’t ask me why. I was always in the background, minding my own business. Now I was front and center and still trying to get used to it. When I took over, we were opening for bands. Now bands were opening for us.
“Yo, Gareth.”
I glanced up. Ransom was grinning at me.
“What’s up?”
“Guess who’s playing in Glendale?” Ransom waggled his brows.
I sat up quickly. “No!”
“Yes! Black Ice!”
“Holy shit!” I bounced. “I’m going.”
“Black Ice is …?” Axel joined our conversation.
“Oh God! They are so awesome! I grew up listening to them. They’re a heavy metal band.” I almost squealed. I didn’t care if I sounded fangirlie. I loved Black Ice. They got me through so much when I was younger.
“So, a concert?” Axel furrowed his brows. “I don’t know, Gareth.”
“Oh come on! Please?” I begged. “I’ll be extra good and won’t call you any names.”
“I’ll have to call the arena first.” Axel pulled out his phone. “I need to talk to their security.”
“Seriously?” I balked.
“I’m going to be carrying, so yeah.” Axel narrowed his eyes at me. “You want to go or not?”
I zipped my lip and grinned.
Once we landed, Axel waited with me for the limo. I was going to stop at my house in town first and grab some clothes. After the concert, I planned to head up to the unconventional house in Flagstaff until it was time to leave for Europe. I love it up on the mountain; everything seems so calm in a chaotic world. The limo pulled up and Axel peeked inside before allowing me in. We hit the road and merged onto I-10. I watched the city fly by and sighed in contentment. This was home.
“You live in the foothills?” Axel asked.
“One house is out here. I like to be close to malls.”
“Seriously?” Axel’s brows furrowed. “Do you actually go to the mall?”
“Yep.” I motioned to the hoodie hugging my slim frame. “I flip the hood on and off I shop. I play a lot of video games so I’m constantly picking up a new one.”
“Let me guess. ‘Rock Band’?” Axel guffawed.
“If you must know, no. I play ‘Dragon Ball Z’.”
I couldn’t help but laugh when Axel’s chin hit his knees. I reclined in the seat and lifted both brows.
“I’m kidding. I play ‘Mario’.”
Axel sighed and placed his face in his hands, shaking his head.
“Would you feel better if I said I play ‘Grand Theft Auto’?”
“That would actually make more sense.”
“A hard core rocker like me can’t play video games? Do you know how hard it is to beat Bowser?”
Axel threw his hands in the air and I chuckled softly.
“When we get to the other house, you’ll see what I actually play.”
“You mean you don’t play ‘Mario’?”
“Oh no, I do. Jinx and I are trying to beat the castle.”
“Oh for fucks sake.”
The gate opened slowly and the limo pulled through. My house was at the end of a dead end street. The nearest house to mine was a good half-mile. We pulled into my circular drive and stopped. I opened the door to jump out but Axel’s large hand landed on my arm.
“Wait here,” he instructed.
I stared at my house through the window as Axel made the rounds of the front, side and backyard. I couldn’t believe how much I missed my place until I couldn’t even go in it. Axel came back and offered me his hand. I took it and he accompanied me to the front door. I punched in the code on the wall and a panel opened. I took my key from inside and slipped it in the lock.
“Fancy,” Axel observed, staring at the little door in the wall.
“This way I never have to carry my keys.”
I opened the door and immediately punched in the security code on the wall panel. The light turned green and I noticed Axel checking the place out.
“You should see the living room.”
“Yeah?” Axel walked forward. “Which way is it?”
“To your left.”
“I’ll hit that after I’ve made the rounds through the entire house.”
“Um, do you want a drink or something?”
“Water is fine. I don’t drink alcohol on a job.”
“Well that’s good because I don’t have any.”
Axel stopped midstride and turned to look at me. “You don’t drink?”
“Not really. I don’t do drugs either.”
Axel tilted his head, observing me. He finally nodded and took a step forward.
“I think I get that. Your father, right?”
“Well, me and Ransom were never into that shit anyway, but yeah, that has a little something to do with it. Both of us are somewhat scared it’s genetic so we just don’t drink too much. We don’t do drugs, either. Besides, there’s a clause in our contracts that forbids us from doing drugs.”
“I guess that’s smart. I’ve heard of enough musicians dying from drug overdoses.”
“Well, we don’t give the guys who smoke pot any shit. I mean you can carry a license and order that shit online now.”
“Huh. Interesting.”
“You didn’t know that?” I asked in astonishment.
“Not really keeping up with the drug trades, Gareth.” Axel cocked a brow.
“Okay. Well, um, I’m just going to get some water.” I jerked a thumb to the kitchen behind me. Axel grunted and took off.
I hit the kitchen and grabbed two water bottles. I really loved my kitchen. I had a four-burner stove, stainless steel, with a grill option. My fridge had a bottom freezer, and double doors with ice and water. Knotty pine cabinets covered one wall and a large pantry with pull-out shelving ran across the other. Right in the middle was my showpiece — a butcher-block island with a pot and pan rack hanging from the ceiling. A noise upstairs alerted me to my huge bodyguard scoping out my place.
“Find anything?” I shouted.
I got silence in return. I filled my glass with water and headed up the winding staircase. My entire house is tile; I’ve always hated carpet and tile is so much easier to clean. I found Axel in the guest room; he was looking under the bed.
“Don’t shoot the dust bunnies. They’re pets,” I said jokingly.
Axel stared up at me and I fidgeted. Did this guy have any sense of humor? I mean…ever? I’d seen him smile now and then and he’d definitely had some serious sarcasm classes in the past, but he seemed kind of …lonely. Maybe that’s just me projecting, who knows? People surround me all the time, but I feel alone.
Now I just sound pathetic.
“I did find a scorpion in the bathroom.”
“Well, that’s nothing new.” I shrugged. I handed him his bottle of water and sipped mine.
I’d only stepped on one in all my years of living in Arizona. Hurts like a bitch, but I wasn’t on death’s door. Axel stood up and continued down the hall. I followed him, sipping my water as he did a sweep of each room. I was proud of my house. I didn’t go the expensive, fancy route most rich people do. I picked this house because it was warm and inviting. I think after Mom died, Ransom and I always had it in the back of our minds that we wouldn’t flaunt our cash. If we’d had the cash we have today back then, we could have saved our mom.
That still stings.
Axel trudged ahead of me and opened the door to my studio. This was the room I’d sunk some money into — it had soundproof walls and a huge skylight in the ceiling. I had four guitars lined up against the wall, a drum set in the corner and a soundboard. The guys and I practiced here now and then between tours. Axel let out a low whistle as he looked around the spacious room.
“Well. This is nice.”
I picked up one of my Fenders and strummed lightly. Axel sat down on one of the beanbag chairs and listened to me play. I stopped.
“Any requests?”
He smirked and I cocked a brow. “What?”
“Eruption.”
I smiled.
Then I played.
I couldn’t see the look on his face because I was so wrapped up in playing, but I had a feeling I knew what his face looked like. Not too many people can play that guitar solo. It had taken me awhile to get it down. I let it flow through me, and wrap around my body in a comfortable cocoon. When I finally opened my eyes, Axel had a look of wonder on his face.
I grinned and put the guitar down.
“Wow,” he marveled softly. “It’s like you’re this different person when you play. You’re so open and real. I can’t believe you never took one lesson.”
“Couldn’t afford them. I listened to a lot of music growing up; it’s how I handled things most of the time. Want to go check out the backyard? I could really go for a swim.”
“I take it the pool’s heated?”
“Solar heated in fact. It is Arizona.”
“Well, lead the way.”
I changed into my trunks and waited for Axel to join me. The pool was clear blue and 98 degrees. It was perfect. A waterfall off to one side gurgled softly. At least I knew my pool guy was taking care of it while I was gone. The sliding glass door opened and Axel stepped out.
I almost swallowed my tongue.
He wore swim shorts that hung low on his hips giving me a perfect view of his V. A line of hair curled around his belly button and disappeared under his shorts. His chest was slightly hairy, not gorilla hairy, thank God, and it looked soft. I wanted to touch it. Beautiful, colorful tattoos decorated his biceps, rib cage and chest.
“Wow,” I nearly stammered. “That’s a lot of ink.”
“You’ve got quite a bit yourself.” Axel indicated my own tattoos.
“Yes, but yours are so colorful. Where did you get them?”
“All over. Some in Thailand, others in Turkey. Where did you get yours?”
“Not anywhere so exotic. Los Angeles, and right here in Arizona.”
Axel brushed past me and stuck a foot in the pool. I got a good view of his back and covered my mouth to try to keep my gasp inaudible.
“I see you noticed my battle scars,” he tossed over his shoulder.
“Oh my God,” I whispered. I couldn’t help it; I reached out and traced one of the scars with my fingertip. Axel whipped around with a snarl and grabbed my wrist.
“Don’t ever touch me!”
I shrank back immediately and Axel’s features moved from anger to shock.
“Oh shit! I’m sorry.” He let go of my wrist.
“No. It’s okay. I shouldn’t have, um, touched you.”
“It’s just a knee-jerk reaction, I guess,” Axel admitted. “I’m not used to people putting their hands on me.”
“So you’ve never…?” I let the question hang.
“Of course I’ve had sex. I just don’t let anyone touch me.”
“Oh. Okay.” I swallowed hard. “Note to self, don’t touch the pissy bodyguard.”
And with that, Axel threw me in the pool.