Chapter 10
Shayla
“Last night was just so amazing!” Leah’s practically glowing. She’s talking so fast, it’s hard to keep up.
I sip at my coffee. It’s burning hot. That’s usually the way I like it, but not today. It’s too much today.
Everything’s too much today. Too hard-edged. Too bright. I wore sunglasses all the way in. I didn’t even take them off when I went underground for my daily subway ride.
I feel like I have a wicked hangover, but I don’t. I wasn’t drunk last night. Not even close.
Seeing Jett shouldn’t do this to me. It’s long since over with him. He’s not even the same person he used to be. Neither am I.
Leah can’t stop talking about how much fun she had last night. At least I was able to stop her before she got into any detail about sex with Bailly. That’s way beyond my limits, even when I’m feeling normal.
I check the time. “We have to get back.”
We don’t really, at least not yet. The coffee shop is close enough to the office but I don’t have it in me to rush up there and get in at the last minute. Not today. Plus I can’t listen to another minute of any to do with Bailly or Tailspin.
Leah gathers up her stuff. “I can’t believe you never told me that you went out with Jett! Why’d you hold out on me?”
I grimace as I try to balance my coffee, bag and sweater while I tug at the heavy door. “Like I said. It was a long time ago. Before they got famous. Before you and I met. It’s a past life.”
One that keeps popping up into my present.
“Yeah, okay. I guess I get that. But still—”
I cut her off as fast as I can. “I’m not telling you anything more about what Bailly’s really like. You know what you need to know. There’s no future with him. He’s a player. They all are.”
Even Jett.
“Okay. But you know the band. And you knew them way back. That’s so cool.”
Leah talks about Tailspin right up until we split off to head to our own desks. At least she doesn’t try to grill me on Jett. I have to get him off my mind.
At least I’ve got piles of work to get through. It’s lunch time when I realize I feel a lot better. I was going to eat at my desk, but instead I text Leah to see if she wants to go out. I’ve just hit send when she appears by my desk.
“I was just coming over to ask you the same thing.”
“Great. Let’s get out of here.”
My phone vibrates in my hand as I’m about to slip it back into my bag. Quickly I glance at the screen, then stop and stare at the long text that’s just come in.
It’s from Jett.
I’m still stunned by what he’s written when Leah and I get to the elevator.
“What’s with you?”
The doors slide open and I answer her without thinking. “I just got a text from Jett.”
Her eyes widen, but the elevator’s too crammed full of people for us to talk about it.
The moment we’re in line at our favorite sandwich shop, she pounces. “So? What’d he have to say?”
I still can’t believe it. “He’s asking me to come see him. Down in DC. That’s the next stop on their tour.”
“Really? Wow. Do you think he wants to get back together?”
I shake my head. “No. There’s no way.”
Is there? No. Not possible. “He said he doesn’t like the way we left things.”
Even as I say the words, I can’t believe them. He has no reason to feel bad about the last time we saw each other. I’m the one whose cheeks burn every time I think about it. I have no clue what got into me that day. Sure, seeing him threw me for a loop. But that was no reason to try and hit on him.
“You’re going to go, right?”
“I can’t just drop everything and go off to Washington.”
“Why not? You’ve already got your vacation days booked. And you don’t have plans for them anymore.”
I frown at her. “Hey.” But my protest is half-hearted. I was going to go away with the guy I’d been seeing recently. We’re not together anymore. It’s hard to even call it a breakup, since we were barely together. My heart wasn’t in it with him.
Leah grabs a small bag of chips to go with her sandwich, squeezing it onto the tray we’re sharing. “I’m sorry. But it’s true.”
“Yeah, okay. Still, I can’t go.” I’m a wreck just from seeing Jett for a very short time here. Going out to visit him and spending more time together might destroy me completely.
“Aren’t you at least curious about what he wants?”
I shrug. “A little.”
Leah shakes her head at me. “Come on. You can’t fool me. You’re still into him. You’ve got a chance to go after what you want. There’s no reason not to take it.”
“I don’t want him. Not anymore.”
She lifts her eyebrow, but doesn’t say anything. We’re both too busy eating as we walk to keep talking. Even after we’ve parted ways, I can’t get Leah’s words off my mind. Go after what you want.
But what do I want? It can’t be Jett.
Can it?
I haven’t replied to his text yet. I can’t decide what to say to him. I’ll do it after work.
By the time our floor has emptied out, I’ve made a decision. Grabbing at my phone, I tap out my reply to Jett. My fingers hover over the screen before I hit send. This is it. Once I do this, there’s no going back. I should be sure of what I’m doing.
I’m not.
I send it anyway.