Chapter 21 Now
After Zoe's spout of word vomit last night, I wasn't sure that Evie would want to see me, but to my surprise she agreed to meet me at my parent's house. The look on her face when she heard I was ready to leave the army felt like a punch in the gut. I could see the hope, and hurt in her eyes all at the same time. And then the shame. I could feel it coming off of her in waves. The more that my feelings began to surface, the more she began to realize how wrong she had been about us. About me.
Even though she hurt me, I owed her an apology as well. I should have been honest. I never should have let her think that I didn't love her more than the army. I thought it was what she needed to hear, what she wanted to hear, so that she could move on, and be happy. We both fought so hard to do what we thought the other needed, that we forgot to even ask. We let each other go, because we thought the other deserved more, and in the end, we both ended up alone.
I sat on the front porch, mulling over what I was going to say, when I watched her car pull into the driveway. I took a deep breath, and stood, as she exited, and made her way towards me. “Where's Gabriel?” I asked, as a way to break the ice.
“Antonio's watching him. I thought we could use the time alone.” She said, looking down at her feet.
“Please don't do that.” I said softly, using my finger to lift her chin. “I'm not one of your foster fathers, I'm not going to hurt you for having an opinon.
“I know.” She smiled, looking into my eyes. “I guess I'm just nervous. It's silly isn't it. You're probably the person who knows me best in this world, and my stomach is literally doing cartwheels.”
“It isn't silly. I feel the same.” I replied with a shaky laugh. “You want to come inside?”
“I'd like that.”
I opened the door for her, allowing her to enter first. It brought back memories from before, when she'd come over for lunch, or dinner. This house was where we spent all of our time as teens, especially after my parents died. It seemed surreal to be selling it now. “I seen the for sale sign out front.” Evie said, as if she were reading my mind.
“Yea, the realtor came by yesterday. It's starting to feel real now I guess.”
“We spent a lot of time in this house.” She smiled fondly.
“Evie, I don't even know where to start. I feel like I have fucked up a lot of things in my life, but letting you walk away, feels like the biggest.”
“Let's sit down.” She said, letting out a breath, and taking a seat on the couch.
I followed her lead, sitting down on the opposite end. Wanting to give her space, but needing to be near her. “The weekend I came home to find you. I was going to tell you everything.” I started. “Your phone was off, your apartment was empty, and I lost it. I came here, to this house, upstairs, and I destroyed it. That last night that we were together, shouldn't have been our last. I should have told you then how I was feeling, and what my plans were.” I sighed, running my hand through my hair.
“I didn't really give you a choice. I told you how things were going to be, and then when I found out I was pregnant I freaked. I ran. I thought I was doing the right thing for everyone involved. I know now that I didn't, but it doesn't change the fact that we both made mistakes Jake. We both handled things badly, immaturly. Maybe we weren't ready?”
“I was going to propose to you.” I said standing, and pacing the floor. “I came home that weekend, to get my mother's ring from my safe. I just.. I just wanted to give us time you know? I wanted you to finish med school, and my last few months of first term enlistment.”
Evie stood then, coming towards me. “You were going to.. purpose?” She stammered softly. “Jake, oh my God! I don't even know what to say to that. I thought we were on the same page. I thought the army was everything.If I had known for just one second, just one. God, that isn't something you just keep to yourself Jake!” She said with exasperation.
“Neither is the fact that you were pregnant with my son!” I said, my own anger getting the best of me.
“No. Don't! Don't bring Gabriel into this. I know I fucked up, ok?! I fucked up, and so did you, and here we are now in this fucked up situation! We have no one to blame but ourselves! We lied to each other to make each other happy Jake, who does that?!” She yelled, her voice on the edge of hysterics.
I took three purposeful steps toward her, and grabbed her hands with mine. “Do you still love me?” I asked. I could tell the question took her off guard, but I had to know. I had to know if we had something worth fighting for, and this time I wasn't going to stay quiet.
“I don't even know you anymore Jake.” She said, as a tear slipped down her cheek. “I thought I did. I thought I understood you, the way you worked, but I just, I don't know anymore.”
“Well I do. I know. I know that I have loved you since I was seventeen years old. I know that I was ready to walk away from my career to spend every single important moment in life with you. I have been sleeping with your ghost for the past two years, and I don't want to sleep with it anymore. I want you. In my house, in my bed, in my heart, in my life Evie.” I said with conviction. “I would marry you today if you'd let me. I didn't tell you the truth back then, but I'm telling you now, and whatever you want to do with that, I'll respect it.”
She just stood there, stunned, her hands still in mine. I was holding my breath waiting for some kind of answer, any indication that I wasn't completely insane. Instead, she took her hands from mine and took a step towards me, placing them on my chest. My eyes locked on hers, and I could see the anticipation there. Reaching up, I brushed her cheek with the palm of my hand, and she closed her eyes. I couldn't wait any longer, I had to feel her lips on mine, so I kissed her. My hands cupping her face, and her nails digging into my chest.
The sexual tension in the air was so thick you could've cut it with a knife, and within seconds, I was scooping her up into my arms and heading for the stairs. She laughed, when I bumped us into the wall, and nearly stumbled up the last two stairs, but when we reached the bedroom, it all fell away. I set her to her feet, and she slowly lifted her shirt over her head. I couldn't stop watching her, as she let her jeans fall next, leaving her only in a white lacy bra and panties.
I licked my lips, before losing my own clothing, and pulling her into my arms. It was as if our bodies had never been apart. Her every curve fitting perfectly against me. Her soft skin like a drug that I couldn't get enough of. My hands were all over her, needing to feel every inch. When my hands covered her ass, I lifted her, allowing her to wrap her legs around my waist. My erection brushed against her needy core, and she moaned into my mouth. That sound was my undoing, and in four steps, I had her laid out beneath me on the bed.
I moved my kiss, from her lips to her jaw, and then her neck, kissing my way down to her stomach, only stopping to slip her panties off. When I crawled back up her body, she reached for my waist band, and I lost my boxers. I planned on taking my time, but it had been so long since I felt the woman I loved in my arms, and I couldn't wait any longer. I got up on my knees, pulling her into a sitting position just long enough to unclasp her bra, and give it a fling. She laughed wrapping her arms around my neck, pulling me back down on top of her, cradling me between her legs as we went.
In one fluid motion, I was slipping inside of her, and our lips were back where they belonged. On each other. I could feel her nails on my back, as I ground against her. Her moans, and whimpers driving me, making me hungry with passion. She whispered my name, and I thought I was going to lose my damn mind. It had been so long since I'd felt her body writhing beneath mine, and now that I had her here again it felt like heaven.
Her moans became louder, and her fingers dug deeper into my flesh, encouraging me. I ground my hips faster, deeper, as I began to feel her walls tightening around me. The clench, and unclench of her core driving me to the point of near explosion. Her legs tightened around my waist, and within seconds I felt her climax all around me. Finally able to let go, I came with her, the action making her moans louder. It had been so long since something had felt so right, so complete, that I found myself not wanting to move. I did though, move, but when I did, I took her with me. Her back, to my front, the scent of her hair enveloping me.
“The best me, has his arms around you Hermosa.” I whispered in her ear, before kissing her there. “And I'm not letting you go again.”
“What about the army? What about the clinic, and my practice? What-”
I turned her in my arms then, effectively interrupting her. “None of that matters now. This. Us. Gabriel. That's what matters. The rest will fall into place. Do you believe me?”
“I think I do.” She smiled, reaching up to run her hand through my hair. “I missed this.” She teased, giving it a little tug.
I gave her a mischievous smile, raising my eyebrows, before disappearing beneath the sheets.
“What are you doing?!” She squealed with laughter, as I used my hands to open her legs.
“You said you missed your hands in my hair. I'm just giving you reason to have them there.” I said, before dipping my head down into her sweetness.