Chapter 34 - Mara
The horror from yesterday has been replaced with numbness. I zip up my suitcase and stand it up, walking to my bedroom door and opening it.
At least I didn’t have to share his bed.
My father is walking towards the back of the house with a concerned expression on his face. He helps me with my suitcase and turns towards me, searching my face.
“Are you sure this is what you want, Mara? It’s all so quick! What’s going on?”
A pang goes through my chest when I look into my father’s eyes. I don’t want to lie to him. I don’t want to lie to Dominic. I don’t want to leave, but what can I do? The only way for me to protect Dominic is to do what Vincent and my mother want me to do.
I swallow and force a smile onto my face.
“I’m sure, Dad.” I open my mouth to say something else, but I can’t think of anything. My father puts his hand on my shoulder and stares into my eyes until I have to look away.
“Mara,” he says softly. “What’s going on?”
I force myself to look at him again as I straighten my shoulders. “I’m getting married, Dad. That’s what’s going on.”
“Why does it sound like a funeral, then? Mara, does this have anything to do with what you were saying before? About using you? Is there something I don’t know?”
I shake my head. “Dad, please. I’m just tired. I was up late packing all my things. This is what I want to do. I want to go with Vincent.”
I hope that my voice is convincing. I hope he believes me, and he stops looking at me like that. I hope that I can just leave this town behind me and that the pain in my chest will fade.
My father sighs and nods his head. “You know you can talk to me, right? If something is wrong? I know your mother is bull-headed sometimes, but that doesn’t mean you have to change your life for her.”
I grimace as I try to smile at my father. “I’m not changing my life for her,” I say. I’m doing it for him.
My father nods and takes a deep breath. “Better get going then,” he says.
It’s a somber walk from my little room at the back of the hotel to the front lobby. Vincent is there, with his sunglasses on and his hair slicked back. My mother is waiting near the door, and I pass both of them without saying anything. I walk straight out the door to the waiting car. My father follows with my suitcases, and I help him load all my things up into the trunk.
As I’m putting the last of my bags in the car, a truck rumbles down the road. I can almost sense Dominic’s eyes on me, even before I look up to see his vehicle. Our eyes meet as he pulls up in front of the hotel. My mother flutters down the pathway towards him, calling out for help behind her.
“Dominic! I wasn’t expecting you until tomorrow! Do you have a delivery already?”
“Finished early,” he says, not looking at her. Our eyes are locked on each other. He’s asking me a thousand wordless questions and I can’t do anything except stand there. My heartbeat sounds like a hurricane in my ears, and it feels like the earth has shifted on its axis. I’m off-balance, and all I can do to stay standing is stare at the man I love.
Every part of my body is screaming to run to him. I want to wrap my arms around him and kiss him and never let him go. A light breeze ruffles his hair. He stands next to his truck and looks at me as if nothing else in the world exists. If I took three steps, I could be in his arms. I could wrap myself around him and tell Vincent to leave me alone.
But what then?
Dominic’s career would be ruined. Vincent might go after Ethan and Aiden as well. I’d be the cause of all their pain once again, just as I was ten years ago.
Vincent appears beside me and puts his hand on the small of my back. A shiver of disgust passes through me and I try to step away from him. I shift my gaze to the ground. He urges me towards the car and I let myself be led to the passenger’s side door. It slams closed and I see Dominic in the mirror, standing exactly as he was. He’s staring at the car, and then shifts his gaze to Vincent.
I wish I could hear what Vincent says to him, but I can’t. In a few moments, he’s sliding into the driver’s side and the car is rumbling to life.
My parents raise their arms in goodbye and I see my father’s eyebrows knit together. He knows something is wrong, but he won’t say it. I blink back the tears that are gathering in my eyes and shift my gaze forward.
This is my life now.
Vincent turns on the radio and I lean my head against the window. I close my eyes and try to forget the look on Dominic’s face when I got in the car.
When we pass the sign on the edge of town that says ‘Thank you for visiting Lang Creek!’, my heart breaks all over again. The sharp pain radiates from my chest to every part of my body until I have to close my eyes and focus on my breathing just to stop myself from screaming.
Vincent reaches over and puts his hand on my thigh. I tense, snapping my head towards him and snarling:
“Don’t touch me.”.
He raises an eyebrow and takes his hand away, placing it back on the steering wheel. He glances over at me and shakes his head.
“You’re going to have to play the loving wife eventually, Mara. This kind of thing won’t fly.”
“You’re the Devil,” I say as my voice catches in my throat.
“I haven’t done this alone, remember. Your own family sold you out.”
He doesn’t look at me when he says it, but I know he’s watching my every reaction. A lump forms in my throat and I try to blink back the tears that are gathering in my eyes.
As much as I hate him – as much as I hate to admit it – he’s right. It wasn’t just him. It was my mother too. She’s the reason I’m here. She’s the reason the Clarkes hate us. She’s the reason that I’ve just left the love of my life behind to fend for himself.
The further we drive from Lang Creek, the more the horror of my situation starts to set in. I’m going back to Silicon Valley. I’m going back to the land of fake people and fake smiles. I’m going back to the land of money. Vincent’s world. I glance out the windows at the mountains around us and say a silent farewell.