Choices…
We all make them. Good or bad, but we all have a choice in life.
Choosing to take the bus to Isla’s earlier seemed like the best choice at the time. So, wandering the streets this early morning hour, trying to get a taxi, with intermittent rain falling on me, helps me to clear the ramblings going through my mind.
My pocket vibrates. Who the hell is calling me at 4:07am in the morning?
Seth’s name flashes on the screen.
“Yeah, man. What’s up?” I ask as I round the corner from her apartment.
“You look like you could use a lift.” His dark blue jeep is idling 200 feet from where I am walking.
Sighing, I hang up as I reach his car, opening the door to Seth’s stony and serious face.
Fuck, my choice to see Isla may not have gone down well with the family.
Closing the door, the vehicle moves. Seth won’t question me. He knows his place in the hierarchy of the family. But being each other’s protection and closest friends for our entire life, he deserves an answer to why I’m risking everyone’s lives.
“I know I fucked up… Fuck man, I know, but she’s everything I think about. She makes me burn from inside out. I’m nothing without her. I had to see her.” Closing my eyes, there’s nothing truer than the words I utter to my closest friend.
“I get it, man. I do.” His eyes stare straight ahead, watching the dark road as we travel it without any lights on. “But, uncle…? We are all trying to find a route in to the heart of this Russians fortress, but it’s going to take time and patience.”
Scrubbing my hands over my days’-old stubble and through my hair, I drop the new bombshell, “The Russian told Isla they will be married in three months. Three fucking months.” My voice trails off. Hearing it off my lips kills another inch of my heart.
Banging the steering wheel with one of his hands, Seth gets another piece of the puzzle. “Fucker. Why the hell does he want that?”
“I have no goddamn idea. I didn’t want to talk about it with Isla. She’s strong. For her family she will do this, but I won’t let it happen. The time frame to end this motherfucker’s life just got shorter. We have three months.” My hands type a message to uncle:
Time frame just got shorter.
Meeting 10am.
That should give me a few hours to try to sleep to clear the haze from my head. Uncle should have calmed down by then too, or he may erupt when I walk in his office. He ordered me to stay away from Isla. And I defied him.
“Take me home, Seth. We both need a few hours of sleep before the next round.” Placing his foot on the accelerator pedal, headlights now on, we both know today is going to be a tough day.
It’s 9:30a.m. and I am ready as I will ever be. Today I must end my freedom. Walking up the concrete steps, pushing on the wooden door, I step into my work place one last time. God, how I love coming here every morning so that I can assist clients in making their special celebrations a magical and special event. It gratifies me when Jules and I transform any space, transcending people into another place. One that they will remember forever.
I have to make Jules understand with as little fuss as possible.
Slowly crossing the wooden floor to my space, Jules finally hears my silent footsteps.
Rushing toward me she holds out her arms. I collapse into them. She hugs me tight as I take steadying breaths, wrapping my arms around her waist. Who knows when the next time will be?
Without letting me go, her voice calms me, “Isla… Are you sure you should be back? You should have let me know and I would have picked you up today.” Relaxing my arms, I move back from her hug.
“It’s okay, Jules. You know the bus drops me easily enough.” Looking down, avoiding her eyes, I walk to my desk and sit on my chair for the last time. I try to memorize the feel of it. The soft foam cushion and weaved fabric. Nothing special. But something so simple. I chose it and it is mine.
“Actually, Jules, I’m not here for long.” My hands play with my handbag as I drop the next bomb on my best friend. “There’s no easy way to say this, but I have to quit. Today. I’m s…sorry, Jules.” A sadness takes over my face. I can’t stop it. Our business is the only thing that keeps me sane.
“What the hell are you talking about, Isla?” Jules voice is a high-pitched squeal. Her arms wave frantically around in chaos. “There’s no way you can just leave me like that! We have clients and weddings.” Her long blonde hair swishes from side to side as she strides back and forth in the one area, shaking her head. Halting abruptly, she straightens her back, and walks directly in front of me. Looking up at her, I won’t cry. I have to be strong for my family and my friends. Her eyes pierce mine, her voice comes out strong and loud, “What the hell is that Russian asshole doing to you this time? What’s really going on?” She can read my life like an open page book.
My shoulders slump. “I saw him last night. Oh…crap… Jules. I have to do what I am told or you know my mother and brother will be hurt.” I shut my eyes so her piercing blue spears can’t penetrate mine.
“Fuck, Isla. You already have given up the past six years of your life for your family. How much more are you willing to give?” She kneels in front of me as she drops her voice down to a whisper. “You didn’t kill your father, Isla. He did it himself. You aren’t responsible.” Tears once again start rolling down my cheeks.
“Jules, it doesn’t matter anymore. If I leave Dimitri, he will kill my family and I don’t know who else he may go after. I am not willing to take any chances with the people I love.” Following my tears down my face with her fingers, Jules sighs.
Her shoulders sag as she places her head on my knees. “So what are his demands this time?” Her voice is soft as though she is speaking to a broken child.
Defeated I say, “I am now his completely. I’m not allowed to work. I am to move in with him and in three months I am… I’m…” The sobbing takes hold of my body, “…to be…married to him.” My arms wrap around her, holding on for dear life. Christ knows when the next time will be that I see my friend. Hostage in Sokolov’s house from tomorrow, I don’t know when it will be.
Lifting her head so my chin lifts as well, she finds my eyes. Her voice pleads with me. “Isla. This man should be locked up and yet you’re willingly going into the lion’s den. Go to the police. I will come with you. I will tell them everything he has done to you. You can’t marry him.”
I will be praying every night for the next ninety days that I don’t marry Dimitri, but a miracle is going to have to occur. Or Alex…
“I will be all right, Jules. I will still phone you and hopefully I will be able to have you come over, if you can stand it. This is something I have to do. I failed my family once, I won’t let it happen again.” I stand and slowly look around the office one last time for the foreseeable future.
Jules stands up and hangs her head in defeat. She knows she won’t change my mind. I am a stubborn mule when it comes to protecting the ones I love.
“Give me one last hug, bestest friend in the world. I expect a call every day. Okay? You know you can call me any time of the day or night. I’m never far away.” Her warmth radiates through my chilled body as I take in her strength one last time, for now any way.
“You know I love you, Jules, and the business will survive.” Trying hard to hold on for as long as possible, we both stand there wrapped in each other’s arms.
“I have to go.” I embrace her hard, one last time then release her.
“I know… Call me anytime, Isla Winters. I will see you soon though. Some way or another, I will see you soon. And if you don’t call, I will be calling you every night. He can’t stop that!” Turning away from me, I hear her sniffling as she heads to the bathroom. Leaving me to gather my thoughts and memories.
Pulling myself together momentarily, I decide I won’t take anything. Hopefully I will be back one day soon.
Reluctantly, I make my feet move, taking me away from the one thing that has kept me sane over the past years. The unknown making my body tremble. I take a deep breath of the cool air as it blows past me.
Quit job. Done…