CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
Krissy
I scanned the papers again, trying to find those photos where I’d seen Rachel with my brothers. Ah, here was one. The beautiful bartender had her head bent close to Tyler and Troy, their dark hair making them almost look like siblings. But the truth was I was their sister, not Rachel.
I looked more closely, and my breath caught in my chest. Because I saw something that I’d never noticed before, the image partially obscured by a passerby. In the bottom right of the photo, almost out of frame, I could see Tyler and Rachel holding hands, as if they were lovers.
Fuck! My brain screeched with pain, like hot oil was being poured all over my body. My brother … at least one of them … was cheating on me. Suddenly it all came into place. They’d shipped me off to Michigan, sure, to shield me from the trial, to keep whispers at bay while I was pregnant with their baby. But now, I’d been abandoned in these remote outskirts, our daughter unacknowledged, because my brothers had taken up with another woman.
The shock and grief overwhelmed me.
“Mom?” My voice quivered when my mom picked up. I was lucky to even get a hold of her. “Mom, can you hear me?” I tried again.
“Baby, where are you?” she asked. “We’ve been so worried, and Tyler and Troy won’t take our calls either. Where are you? I’m coming right now.”
I was gratified that my mom’s first instinct was to rush to my side. But her comforting words weren’t enough for the searing pain.
“Mom, I have something to confess,” my voice trembled.
“Honey, whatever it is, I’m sure it’s okay,” she said soothingly. “Robert and I, we’ve been trying to find you for the last year, but you disappeared. Why honey? What’s going on?”
“Mom …” I continued. “I had the baby out here in Michigan … because the baby’s fathers are Troy and Tyler,” I said faintly.
That got my mom. A crackling silence ensued, the line silent and staticky as my mom took in the import of my words.
“Honey,” she said calmly. “What do you mean Tyler and Troy are the fathers? There can only be one dad,” she said.
I took this as a good sign. At least she was focused on the biological aspect, and hadn’t made screeching sounds about fucking my brothers, how we were related, etc.
“They’re identical twins,” I said with a small hitch in my voice. “They have the same DNA so there’s no way to tell who Annie’s father is. And mom,” I added miserably, “I don’t know who the father is because I was sleeping with them both.”
Again, ominous silence. But then my mom’s voice came back on, oddly maternal and comforting.
“Oh honey, Robert and I guessed something happened between you and the twins, when you disappeared and your brothers wouldn’t take our calls. We knew something had happened, and well … we didn’t know how to bring it up. We didn’t know how to broach this sensitive issue, although I was ready to fly in and give them a piece of my mind. Instead, Robert convinced me to be patient. But honey, what went wrong? Why aren’t you with your brothers? Are they not good dads?”
And the story came tumbling out, how I’d been alone in Michigan for the past year, how Annie hadn’t even met her fathers yet. I cried, the tears streaming hot and fast down my cheeks, the first time I’d unburdened myself during this difficult, terrible time.
My mom clucked and murmured in all the right places, but her reaction was different from what I expected. Instead of saying “ditch those guys, they’re losers,” she suggested the opposite.
“Honey, why are you still in Michigan? What are you waiting for if the trial’s already over?”
“I don’t know Ma. I figured Troy and Tyler would send for me once everything was settled … but they didn’t.” I started sobbing again.
My mom sighed heavily.
“Honey, I know I haven’t been around since I married Robert, but for seventeen years I was a single mom, so tough times aren’t new. We didn’t get you through junior high without a fight, right? So be that woman now … go and find your future. Search for it, make your brothers face you if that’s what it takes.”
Was that the right thing to do? Had I been a weak wallflower, shamefully accepting the twins’ money and bad behavior? My mom and I had struggled financially when I was growing up, but perhaps it had been worth it. Maybe to develop a sense of independence and self-worth, I needed to draw boundaries, to stand up for myself. Had I forgotten all that in the past year?
Suddenly, I knew my mom was right. I needed to confront my brothers, show them Annie, and challenge them to do right by us. What was happening was simply unacceptable, and there was no way it could, or should, go on, monthly checks be damned.
“Ma … I think you’re right,” I said softly. “I need to face my fears. I need to go to New York, and … if there’s another woman, I need to confront them about it.” I choked slightly at these words.
“That’s right,” said my mom. “And remember, you’re not just their sister or girlfriend. You’re the mother of their child now, a woman in full. They need to understand that, and pay you the respect you deserve.”
“Thank you, Ma,” I murmured softly. “I’m going to book a ticket right now, for me and the baby.”
“And honey, if you need anything, I want you to come to me, okay? We’re the Lyon girls, we stick together,” she reminded me. “I’m always a hundred percent behind you. I’m so proud of you for having a baby on your own. It ultimately doesn’t matter that Annie’s dads are her uncles too, okay? I love you.”
“Thanks Ma,” I said softly. “I love you too.”
And as I hung up the phone, I realized my mom was right. The real Kristen had been lost in the last year, in a deep spiral of gloom and depression. But she was coming back … even if my brothers didn’t like it.