Chapter 6
Tabor’s clothes were piled on one chair, and the empty suitcase sat on the table.
Tabor stood looking at the suitcase, his hands in the back pockets of his jeans.
Tiana sat in the armchair directly across from the chair holding the clothes.
“Maybe we should go through them again,” she said. “Maybe it’s in a pocket.”
Tabor shook his head. “I checked the pockets,” he said. “Besides, you didn’t stick your hands into each pocket as you were looking for something to wear, did you?” he asked.
“No,” Tiana admitted. She slumped back in her seat.
“Let’s go talk to the front desk,” Tabor suggested. He started piling his clothes back into the zip up, rolling suitcase.
They’d looked through each item twice already, shaking every tee shirt, jacket, and pair of pants around before folding them back up.
Tiana didn’t say anything. She began imagining the ring in detail — the sparkling diamond, the white gold setting and band. Her father had given that ring to her mother, when they married at age twenty-two.
She stared listlessly at the carpeting, and heard Tabor zip up his suitcase. Soon his hand protruded into her line of vision, as he extended it to her.
“Come on,” he said.
She reached for his hand and he pulled her up, out of the chair. His gesture of support and kindness meant the world to her. It gave her the courage to keep looking for the lost ring.
In fact, the whole day with him, so far, had been becoming more and more pleasant. Though neither of them had ordered alcoholic drinks at lunch, she could feel each of them becoming more and more relaxed as the hours together progressed.
She felt almost as if she had a buzz — like she was high on something. Was my iced tea spiked? She wondered. Did his coke come with rum in it? Why are we both acting so loopy? Maybe it’s because we’re tired. It was a long night last night.
He let go of her hand as they started walking down the hallway, side by side.
She wished he was still holding it.
When they reached the front desk, Tiana prayed for good news. Please, please, please let this be good news, she thought.
But the look on the attendant’s face said otherwise. He grimaced dramatically as they approached.
“Mr. Knight, Mrs. Brown. I’m afraid that the search didn’t have any positive results.”
“You didn’t find the ring?” Tiana asked, wanting to cut through his overly formal speech.
“No,” he confirmed. “No ring.”
Tiana let her shoulders slump. She felt Tabor’s arm circle around hers, squeezing her. The squeeze gave her energy.
“Are you sure?” Tabor asked. “Who cleaned the room?”
“Our head housekeeper spoke with the two girls who were assigned the turn-over. She and the staff looked through the hamper, and went back to the room also. She says that they even looked through the vacuum bags.”
Tabor was quiet for a moment.
Tiana waited for him to something. Use that big brain of yours, she pleaded silently. Help me figure this out.
“How about the sink?” Tabor asked. “Did they check down the drain? What about under the bed? Are you sure they looked there?”
The attendant hesitated. He made a move to reach for the phone, and his hand hovered over it as he spoke. “I can call the head housekeeper — you could speak to her yourself…?” he said, turning the question into a statement with his tone of voice.
“No, no,” Tabor said. “You know what? I’d like to check the room myself. And it looks like I’m not flying out until tomorrow anyways, so I think I’d like to book it again, if it’s still available.”
The attendant nodded. “I believe it is,” he said. “Let me confirm that for you Mr. Knight. One moment please.” He began tapping away on his keyboard, looking at the computer screen before him as he did so. “Mmm hmmm,” he said. “Yes, it does appear to be free. One night only, Mr. Knight?”
Tabor nodded. “Yes,” he said, pulling out his wallet. He passed a stiff, solid gold credit card to the front desk attendant.
Tiana reached for Tabor’s hand. She squeezed it “Thank you,” she mouthed to him as they waited for the room to be booked.
Soon, the attendant handed over a familiar key.
They turned away from the desk. “I don’t like leaving things to other people, that I could do better myself,” Tabor said. “I never have. It can make things tough when you own a business,” he said with a chuckle. “I’d rather do the work than delegate it to someone else. I’m learning though.”
“I’d like to check out the room with my own eyes,” Tiana said. “I’m glad you booked it. I really appreciate this.”
“Sure,” Tabor said.
“The head housekeeper was a really old lady,” Tiana added. “Her vision might not have been very good. Maybe she missed something. I swear, she was like seventy. I have no idea what she’s still doing working.”
Tabor laughed. “Who knows… maybe we’ll find it. Two non-glasses wearers like us… we probably have better vision than some old bag of a housekeeper.”
Just then, the elderly housekeeper rounded the corner, and Tabor and Tiana zipped their lips. They both nodded to her and then walked stiffly passed.
When they turned the corner, the elevator was available, and they rushed into it. The moment that the doors closed, Tiana burst out laughing.
Tabor guffawed too, his belly laugher ringing out through the hallway. “I didn’t mean to call her an ‘old bag’!” he said, between laughs. “Shit! What are the chances.”
“An old bag! Who even says that?” Tiana asked, her eyes tearing up.
This time, the tears were from mirth.
As they calmed down, a full silence took over the elevator. She felt that buzz again, that sense of being high. She glanced at Tabor. He looked at her, and an instant of wordless communication zipped between them, as fast as lightning.
What is this? Wondered Tiana, breaking her eyes away. What is this feeling? And why do I seem to always get it around Tabor Knight?
It felt like more than simply attraction, although physical attraction was definitely a part of it. But the energy had an intense quality, much deeper and stronger than the sense of sexual attraction to men that she’d felt it the past.
The elevator arrived on the fifth floor, and the doors opened.
Tabor extended his arm and held the sliding door in place with one had. Tiana stepped through the opening, and she felt Tabor use his other hand to guide her over the seam between elevator and flooring.
Again, the light, subtle pressure of his palm against the small of her back flooded her with emotion and attraction. How does he do this to me? She wondered. It’s like I’m under his spell.
What kind of a spell is it?
She didn’t have time to answer this for herself, because before she knew it, they were at the door of the hotel room.
Tabor used the key to unlock the door. He opened it and Tiana stepped inside.
Tabor stepped in after her.
Immediately, Tiana felt the charged energy of the room. It was filled with memories of the night before.
The bed was now perfectly clean and remade, but when she looked at it, she could see the ghosts of the night before, there on the bed. She could imagine her own body there, and Tabor’s on top of her, making her feel all kinds of good.
In her mind, she could even hear their cries of pleasure.
The memories stopped her short.
Tabor walked around her, into the room. He flicked on a light, which added brightness to the room, snapping her focus away from the bed. She realized how dim the room had been before he turned the light on.
It’s late afternoon now, she thought. Where did the day go? Once I find this ring, how am I going to sell it and get to a mechanics in time?
There’s got to be a pawn shop around here, she thought. The idea sounded incredibly low tech, but she couldn’t think of anything else. Listing the ring for sale online would take too much time. She didn’t have time. In fact, she was supposed to be back to work in the morning. She’d only taken the weekend off — Saturday for the reunion, and Sunday to drive home. Now, it was nearing evening on Sunday night. The delay was completely unexpected.
A pawn shop, yes, she thought. Tabor walked to the bed, and knelt down beside it. She watched him start to look underneath, sweeping his hand back and forth.
I’ll just look it up on my phone. I’m sure there’s one right around here, and they’ll give me a few grand, at least. They have to. And I bet they’ll be open late. That will get me enough cash so that I can book another hotel room, at least, and then I’ll got to a mechanic’s first thing tomorrow.
I bet it is my timing belt, she thought, as she wandered into the bathroom.
She made a mental note to call her manager, Jackson, at the Shop and Start where she was a cashier. I’ll tell him that I’m not feeling well, she decided. Mentioning the car troubles would only cause Jackson to worry. Tiana didn’t want to cause a big fuss. That will buy me some time, she thought.
The plan sounded good enough. She peered into the cream colored, porcelain sink, looking for any signs of a ring. It was spotless, and she knew that the cleaning crew would have seen the jewelry as they were cleaning.
The drain was tight and modern, with no gap where a ring could have possibly fallen through.
Tiana moved to the toilet. She remembered peeing a few times the night before, but as she stared into the porcelain bowl, she couldn’t imagine a scenario where the ring would have fallen into the toilet. Why would it? she thought. No, it was much more likely that it had fallen off while I was doing something… like pulling off my shirt… where the ring could have snagged or loosened.
She gave up in the bathroom and moved to the bedroom.
Tabor was now on the other side of the bed, on his knees. He was looking under the bed, his face pressed to the carpeting. He was using his phone as a flashlight, and Tiana could see the beam shining under the bed.
She crouched down and looked under the bed as well. As far as her eye could see, there was no sign of a ring.
“Anything in the bathroom?” Tabor asked, looking at her through the opening under the bed.
“No,” Tiana said.”Nothing.” She sighed and stood up.
Tabor stood as well.
Tiana walked to the window. She gazed out.
No ring. This can’t be happening! That was my ticket home!
She remembered hearing once that it didn’t take much to push a person who was living on the poverty line over the edge to homelessness.
A broken down car could have domino-like effect.
First, the car went.
Then, without a car, the job went.
Next, the living situation. And voila! You have a homeless woman, living out of a broken down 1991 Dodge hatchback.
Maybe even in Austin, she thought. I might not even be able to get home to collect my clothes.
Why, oh why did I think it was a good idea to spend the last of my savings on stupid clothes and manicures and salon appointments? All to impress people I haven't seen for more than ten years. And who I won’t see again for another ten.
Or ever.
I won’t come to the next reunion if I’m homeless.
The view from the window filled her with more fear. She could see across the highway, all the way to the Marriott, and the parking lot where her car sat.
The late afternoon sun glinted off of the Marriott's glassy front facade. The hints of peach and pink in the sun’s reflection impressed her further with the late hour. The sun was sinking in the sky, three hours from setting. It was just dipping into Austin’s faint smog layer, and the air turned the sun into a darker color than it was during the day.
“What am I going to do?” Tiana said out loud. “I thought I’d have it in my hand by now,” she said. She turned, and saw that Tabor had taken a seat on the bed.
“I don’t know,” he said. “I’m sorry. We tried.” He looked truly upset.
“It’s not your fault,” she said. “It’s mine.” She walked to the bed and sat as well. “All of this,” she said, tossing her hands up into the air. “Have you ever made a mistake… like a really, really bad mistake, that you wished you could take back?” She stroked her hair absent mindedly, remembering all of the money that she had spent on her appearance.
Tabor looked at her.
“You mean… last night?” he asked.
Tiana thought of the reunion, and all of the effort she had put into preparation. She thought of the extreme excitement she’d felt, while driving to Austin. As if by proving herself to her classmates, her whole life would change. I was so stupid, she thought.
“Yes,” she said. “I never should have come to Austin.”
Tabor blew a breath out, causing Tiana to look over at him. He was raking a hand through his hair. “Look, Tiana--” he said, his face filled with a pained look.
Tiana realized her mistake. “Oh!” she said. “No, honey, I don’t mean you… I don’t mean that last night with you was a mistake. That was, like, the best thing that’s happened to me in years! I didn’t mean it like that.”
She saw relief pass over him.
“No,” she said. “It’s just… Tabor, to be honest, my life is all fucked up. I spent way too much money getting here to Austin. I mean, getting here.” She motioned to her hair, her nails.
“I don’t usually look like this,” she explained. “And it cost me a lot of money. Money that I could really use, now. I’m not like you… I live paycheck to paycheck. The most I have in the bank… like, ever, is five hundred dollars — and that’s when things are good. That’s like my safety net.”
It felt good to admit this. She realized that she’d never actually said this aloud. Back in East Texas, everyone in her circle was in the same place… just trying to get by.
It felt bizarre to try to have to explain what that was like to a billionaire. “I work for minimum wage,” she said. “I have since we left high school. I’m not like you Tabor… I’m not out there saving lives. I’m a cashier at a grocery store. And that’s fine… it’s… it’s the way things are,” she said, her voice almost failing her as she struggled to continue her confession.
Tabor had turned on the bed, pulling on knee up so that he could face her. She twisted her body as well, so that she could look directly at him.
“It’s always been like that,” she said, “And I’m used to it. But I thought — I thought that somehow, if I could show up here, looking… looking and feeling like someone else, then maybe I could get past some of my hang ups. You know… some of the things that hold me back. I thought it would give me a feeling of… I don’t know, confidence or something.”
She waited for him to speak.
He did not.
She felt like a fool.
“I guess I’ve been reading too many pop psychology blogs. You know… ‘Five Ways Improving Your Self Esteem Can Change Your Life’...”
It all sounded so pathetic now, that she was saying it out loud. But for six months, every day leading up to the reunion, she’d consumed such articles. Articles with titles like ‘How Your Self-Image Impacts Your Earning Ceiling’.
“I guess it was all bullshit,” she said. “But I believed it… all of it. I spent my safety net… and now my car’s crapping out. I don’t usually drive this far, actually, and I never should have, in that old thing.”
She was quiet again. Her admission hung in the air around them, feeling dirty to Tiana, like the smog that hung over the city outside.
She couldn’t bear to look at Tabor, to see his expression of pity. She looked at the comforter instead. It was impossibly white, pristine, and spotless. The fine fabric felt too soft beneath her fingers.
How can things like this exist? she thought, comparing the thick, white, down filled comforter to the worn, stained quilt that she used at home. To some people, this is normal. She ran her palm along the luxurious fabric, back and forth, nervously.
The silence was killing her.
What does he think of me? she wondered. This is the life he’s used to. Fine things, three hour lunches, first class flights. What does he know about broken down cars and working for minimum wage?
His hand landed over hers, finally stilling her nervous movements.
“Tiana,” he said. “I can help you.”
She pulled her hand away. “That’s not what I’m asking for,” she said, a sense of pride that she didn’t know she had lashing out. “I’m not telling you this so that I can con you out of money.”
“You’re not conning me out of money,” Tabor said.
“I just want to find that ring, so I can get home. I have to get home.” She thought of her job, her cat, the way her mortgage payment would soon be due.
She looked out the window. “I think if I found it, I could pawn it. And then take the car to the shop in the morning, and get home maybe the next day.”
She thought again of calling in sick. She’d have to call her neighbor, who was feeding her cat, as well, and tell her about the delay. “People are waiting on me,” she said. “Jackson. And my neighbor. But now that I haven’t found the ring… I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what I can do. I’m totally stuck. I don’t even know where I’m going to stay tonight.” She glanced at the clock. It was almost five. “It’s already evening,” she said, a sense of panic filling her.
*****
Tabor listened to her. He heard her voice rise with panic. He wanted to try to help her calm down, but his thoughts were stuck on one name that she’d said. Jackson. That must be the man she’d going to marry, he thought.
Tabor wanted to ask her more. At the same time, he didn’t want to know about the fiance who was waiting for her at home. He didn’t want to know how they met, and what she saw in him.
He didn’t want to know if she laughed with her fiancé, the way she and Tabor laughed. He didn’t want to know what she was doing, having sex in Austin, when she had a husband-to-be waiting on her in East Texas.
Maybe she’s in some kind of an open relationship, he thought. Maybe… she and this man — this Jackson dude — have some sort of an agreement, where having sex with other people was okay. That would explain why she’d been so open to his advances the night before, not once mentioning her fiancé and the relationship that she was in.
She seemed to not have a guilty conscience about it. Hearing her explanation about her financial worries made him see that her concern about the ring was more about the money that it was worth than what her fiancé would think.
Maybe he’d want her to fix her car, he thought. Maybe he’s just as broke as she is, and the love that they share is worth more than some material ring.
Tabor felt his mind swimming with confusion. It didn’t help to be sitting on the bed across from the most beautiful woman he’d been in the presence of in a long time. More than that, he felt a deep connection to Tiana. It went beyond their shared past. I feel… close to her, he realized, in some inexplicable way. Like she understands me, better than anyone in Silicon Valley ever could.
Without being able to help himself, he placed his hand on her knee.
“You can stay here tonight,” he offered.
He moved her hand up and down her leg twice.
He meant for the gesture to be comforting, but after the second pass of his hand against her jeans, it became sensual. He felt her react to his touch, and the energy between them changed.
She looked up at him, her eyes wide with desire and need.
This, Tabor said. This openness… this obvious attraction between us. She’s not even trying to hide it. She must be in an open relationship. There’s no other reason for her to act so obviously into my advances.
So what? he wondered. Everyone has their own deal going on. Not everyone wants to be in a monogamous, one man to one woman relationship.
He’d even heard people describe open relationships as a natural evolution — kind of a cutting edge, progressive thing.
I could never do it, he thought. I want one woman.
I don’t know how her fiancé handles it… knowing that he has to share her with other men. If she was mine, I wouldn’t want to share her. If she was mine, I’d want it to be just us… forever. This realization caught him off guard. He’d never felt this way about any woman. He was always one to avoid commitment.
I could never be in an open relationship, he thought.
But if that’s
what she wants, than good for me. I guess I’m lucking out, just
to be with her here, and now.
She obviously wants me. And I want
her.
He let his hand move over her leg again, the tension between them building. His question hung in the air, and he met her eyes with a questioning look, waiting for her response.
Her voice was soft as she responded. “Really?” she asked. “I guess…” she laid her hand over his, sliding her long nails lightly against his skin. “That might be nice,” she said.
He felt arousal stirring powerfully within him, and he felt that she was on the brink of it as well.
He wanted to lean forward, kiss her, and pull her down in the bed. But he had to get clear on one point before the lust in his body overrode his clear thinking.
“I just want to be clear on one thing,” he said, struggling to speak. His voice came out low, and urgent. “You -- I don’t want to cause trouble for you…you know, at home. With your situation… whatever that is. I’m not judging you… I just want to be sure that this is, you know, okay with your man, Jackson.”
“My man?” Tiana asked. He saw a blank look cross over her face.